He been workin🙅🏽‍♂️🙅🏽‍♂️

is that you?

Ruth Chris

flexbakk'

Dr Doofenshmirtz (trauma)

produced by: happytrench
composition: happytrench and sira vendeur
engineering: the spirit salesman

"Spirit Reaper," is set on the path from Agartha to the spirit staircase.  On the way there the salesman is stopped by the, "Spirit Reaper," a deity that resides in Agartha that knows the time and place of death for the souls of humans on Earth.  The Reaper knows of the spirit salesman, but doesn't know who he was on Earth.  The salesman doesn't know that he's a being that has free will, and isn't bound by the normal confines of the universe he resides in.  The Reaper asks for his name and the salesman obliges and tells him.  The Reaper then asks him why he decided to do this. This is where the entry starts.  The salesman says the main reason was the pain he felt due to loss, and then lets the listener know that he told the reaper his name.  The Reaper tells the salesman that, "You reap and sow what you claim," but the salesman expresses how he wishes he could go back and change the decisions he made that led him here. He explains that he's been making choices that will lead to his demise, because he hates living.  He found the reaper in hopes of, "solving his problem."  The Reaper explains that he can't help with killing him, and explains that there's someone he might be able to talk to in a realm called, "The Trench," to gain more insight. The reaper then gives the salesman the ability to see and use the spirit staircase. Looking down at his skin, because it "doesn't feel real anymore."  He mistakes this as him finally being freed from the woes of life, and apologizes to his mother for his issues with drug abuse.  He thinks the spirit staircase is the way to his "grave." On the journey he gives insight on his mental state and reminisces on everything he's done in Agartha so far.  He questions why he's alone, and wonders if it's because it's hard to love him.  He sees the stars and wonders why they're so far above him, then says he feels the prying eyes of the shadows watching him.  Understanding his life is finite, he made the decisions to sell spirits hoping it would make him feel complete, knowing that he'd have stories to tell his mother.  The Salesman is feeling lost, knowing he can't take back what he's done.  He'd rather let his thoughts consume him than confront the consequences of his actions. Knowing he struggles to take good advice, and would rather figure it out on his own, he lets the listener know how not being able to take advice is one of the reasons he feels like he's failing.  He expresses the hatred he feels towards the person that he's become, and how he feels that life isn't fair.  He lives his life on the edge knowing that he isn't afraid of death. He welcomes it.  That's why he told the Reaper his name.  He's excited to hear his call. 

On the journey to becoming more fully human sometimes we get caught up in mistakes we made in the past.  The salesman in our story refuses to take advice from anyone else, and decides to fight all his battles alone.  It's easy to internalize feelings we have and not reach out for help when we truly need it.  This only leads to more pain and suffering, although it's important for us to be strong, it is also important to know when to draw the line between being strong, and being hopeless.  Reach out to someone when you feel like you can't take the pain anymore.  Don't go and search for the Reaper, you have the will to accomplish so much more before you meet him. 

quality control: the spirit reaper

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numb (prod.ihatedynasty)

night life (prod.vanquish)

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