Featuring Me!

Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pevRcbmswqM&lc=UgwBy6luJ9g907dcL-14AaABAg

JustGamer as Oh Il-nam
Swizkii as John Kramer
Beat produced by Hollywood Legend
Mixed by Special Inquisitor Rayyan
Thumbnail by Special Inquisitor Rayyan
Art by TreToonzz
Written by Jacobrl99 & Special Inquisitor Rayyan
Additional Writing Help by Awesome Ayden, Nugget, Everon, Javi-Kami & YourLeastFavoriteEthan

Oh Il-Nam:
Greetings, name’s Il-Nam. Number one in games and views
Stepping to the observant owl? This hobblin’ hog is bound to lose
Pigsaw should stop “kraming” characters into his movies
To shoot Blank, I make better tests with needles and Dalgona cookies
John's an icon of the past, while my show remains viral
With each new film, Saw keeps going on a downhill Spiral
Your box office gross is child’s play compared to what my fame claims
An ink blotch to the paper I rake in: call that a Squid Game!

John Kramer:
Tobin’s here to ring the bell, live or die? Make your choice.
I’d tell you to cast your vote, but it seems you’ve lost your voice
Voluntary participation brought our visions to fruition
But your cravings for recreation sent you on a suicide mission
I arouse fear in my players, my tests leave them tranced
You lost your marbles then forfeited them after you pissed your pants
The most viewed show on Netflix, sure, but you reaped what you sowed
My legacy spans nine films, your story wrapped up in nine episodes

Oh Il-Nam:
Jill was slammed against a knob, opening the door to your villainy
Gideon’s death sealed Cecil’s fate, putting an end to your chivalry
You Tuck-ed up your marriage then Jill deemed your actions dishonorable
While Nelson mixed up your X-Rays, left your cancer inoperable
You could’ve been saved, but Umbrella refused to cover your reign
So you kidnapped William Easton, and put him through a world of pain
Oh, and John, I gotta say: throughout your villainy what was your gain?
You asked many to play a game, but in the end you’re just proving you were the one who got played
The night is Young, John, don’t piss away your life while you have it
A failed suicide attempt altered your ideals, that’s a happy accident
Don’t talk about loss of voice, your throat was slashed on your deathbed
I gave my players a choice and they all returned to scratch off their debt
Saw, an ironic name, since you were cut out of your franchise
I gave out Won but when Wan gave out, it seemed all of your fans died
Your accomplices couldn’t stay within the lines of your philosophy
They Rigg’d their tests for failure, killing their victims unlawfully

John Kramer:
Your psychology is Hoff-man, making players seem like equals
But you lived while those around you died ‘cause they thought you were feeble 
I’d spit ill, Nam, but you’re already looking sickly 
Even Jigsaw’s puzzled by your weak attempts to go and diss me
With all your children’s games, you’re better off watching a fair
Four walls build a home, so I’ll keep running circles around this square
I’m riddlin’ you with roasts while riding this beat like a shotgun carousel
Surely I’m not your gganbu, so take a step back when I’m raising hell 
Green Light! Your show’s direction switched when you betrayed your buddy
Red Light! Until your tumor caught up to you and you were betrayed by your body
Call upon your henchmen, I tapped Tapp and Steven sang his song
Survivors become my accomplices, gone is your relationship with Seong
Wealth corrupted your humanity and decent people became pawns
So it’s time you played my games, never again seeing dawn
Your series was renewed, but your longevity was ill-fated
I gave you an early retirement, Player 001 eliminated

John Kramer vs Oh Il-nam - Citric Rap Battle!

In this series debut, Batman villian Hush goes up against Oregon urban legend The Bandage Man in a battle of the bandage-wearing murderers. Which one will leave with the most bruises?

Spadical as Hush
ForgottenSon as The Bandage Man

Hush:
I say only strike when your foes weakness show
This battle would’ve been easy, but I didn’t bring soap (aargh)
You’re lost of your life, cemented to horrendous smell and bandaged scars 
You want a ride? Hop on the back of my parents car (aargh)
I owned Wayne’s entire town, while you only had a road 
I tortured a fucking clown, so I think I can crack a joke 
Enjoyed logging alone, but it came to a sudden stop 
Had so little friends, even the saw mill had to cut him off 

The Bandage Man:
You’re a weak and decrepit man, why can’t you accept the fact
You wanted your parents dead, couldn’t even perfect that 
They almost made it to the grave, but one was saved by one Thomas Wayne
You wanted Bruce’s praise, but now you’re waning in his father’s name 
Even you don’t know who you are, despite that I remain nameless
When I stalk they see me clearly, you hide behind people’s faces 
Riddled with plastic surgery , think it’ll eclipse your damages 
But your fathers abuse? Now that cannot be fixed with bandages

Hush: 
In Oregon, you like drinks, let’s crack open a cold case
Greet you with a couple shots, how’s that for some first aid
With locals pirating your image, do you really think you’re scaring me?
Mythos blew out proportion, no wonder they call it Cannon Beach
I don’t know who I am? I’m renowned for my one story
While your local town fucked around, came up with three origins
I’ll maim this mummy and make sure he has a bad time
With both this battle and your life, you were killed by a fucking landslide

The Bandage Man: 
When the clown attacked, you became the prey of the birds 
And you turned to the Joker’s jester in every sense of the word
You went back to your old friend, only for him to flush you out
Ironic, you want things to go your way you should just shut your mouth
Your memory is broken, you won’t kill me, know the truth
You’ll dent me with holes? Dent sure put holes into you 
And with your story ruined, Tom traded just to riddle us
No surprise, when your film’s reception faded to a- 

Written by Awesome Ayden and Everon
Produced by ESKRY
Mixed by Jordy
Cover Art by Everon

This battle was written, demoed, recorded, mixed and (privately) uploaded in 75 hours.

Hush vs. The Bandage Man - DC vs. Anything (Issue #1)

Ready for Round Two?
Spidey Fam as Sonic.exe
Mancha as Squidward's Suicide
Beat produced by Tantu
Beat mixed by GlitchDude
Written by Trakked
Additional help by M!CAH, Nooby, Candyman, M&Mattie, Worms, Snakebite126 and QuickDissa
Mixed by Jort
Thumbnail by Jort
Art by Trakked

Battle:

Sonic.exe:
ACT ONE: I’m the guy that drives readers to madness
YOU CAN’T RUN, hell, you can’t even get off your mattress
How do you expect to win if you act like you live
Under the BLACK SUN, stop acting like your life's been so tragic
Yeah, you should begin to bow, on the ‘net I’m infamous
Get a soul and rip it out, they know fun is infinite 
You think that you’re different, now? You know death is imminent.
Suicide, I won’t allow. You don’t get that privilege.
And I will say, it’s brave that you went to perform on stage
But they’d much rather cave their faces in than hear you for a day
But I’ll help you before you crack under pressure again
Your episode and soul are lost; come and play with me, friend..

Squidward’s Suicide:
I’d like to play you a song. Sit down and listen.
I’m disappointed with all the shots that you’re missing.
And you’re attempting to escape from the cartridge that bottles you?
Note to evade the Minors while you’re suffering in Solitude
Your Hopes and Dreams have been buried since your beginning
You cheat at every game you play, yet there is emptiness in winning.
And like me, you’ve degraded to a shell of yourself
Sonic can't handle ocean flow, so I'll drench you as well

Sonic.exe:
Oh, what's wrong, Squidward? Am I getting in your head?
You know that your neighbors hate you and would rather have you dead
Wouldn't you agree that you've been soft with your lines, friend?
You may have some more disses, but you've so little time left…
Let’s play Hide and Seek, you’re behind that ego and tryna be something quite unique
But your lines are weak and your life is bleaker; don’t cry to me, now it’s time to see 
You are merely a toy on my shelf to play with, I’ll shred you and tear you and rip your face, then
Blast your head to Red Mist, like the dead kids, what do you expect when you play with Satan?
DO IT. Now that you’ve seen the terror I have wrought,
A hopeless soul will burn forever knowing I Am God.

Squidward’s Suicide:
Why do you keep trying? I can’t take any more of this…
You take your only friends and leave them like the tortured kids
We’re both failures, yet you have no excuse.
Grab the strings you pull to hang yourself and prove yourself some use.
You try and try to hide them yet your flaws aren’t so hard to see
Since you and Sally couldn’t make a perfect harmony
You hunted Amy down to stop her from breaking your heart
But try to take apart my frames, and you’ll end up taken apart.
No more games. No more tricks, and I will never be your friend.
Your files are executable, so now you face the end.
You think you’re some eldritch deity inside a franchise
You're not a god, all 8-bits of your frames have died
Your reality exists within a cell
I'll pull the plug on your computer, then see you in Hell.

Sonic.exe vs Squidward's Suicide - Rap Cypher #40

CAST: 

TheToppo as Bored Ape 

Everon as Crypto Punk 

VonnyVerse as Freddy Funko 

CREW : 

Written by WeThink 
Additional Writing by VonnyVerse 
Art by WeThink & Teimunity 
Mixed and Mastered by Kaewoo 
CoverArt by Toastie  
Beat prod. By AnyWayWell 
Special Thanks to Spade, Shimario , The Monarchy, molliebendite & Corncob

NFTs vs Funko POPs!- Rap Battle! ft. TheToppo, Everon & VonnyVerse

Recorded November 2024

10/12

Prod by LethalNeedle


rump

The devil’s very emissary himself
Really wants to lend a helping hand to get me some wealth
But the jester dress he’s wearing must embarrass him, how does it feel?
Before I say “What’s your deal?” I’m starting with “What’s your deal?”

It’s your last straw and I’ll turn it to gold
Have a crack at your glass jaw, bitch I earn what I’m owed
Cause I’m the real master of returning a pact
I guess our tasks swapped, cause I’m serving your ass

How did the swindlin’ traitor
Get a game with God who straight-up robbed your win in it later?
You’re getting outplayed here
In trickery, it goes me, him, then you place third
It’s rigged in our favours, you’re just real good at favours

meph

It isn’t wrong, I’ll make anything you want, bring it on
I grant wishes, while you’re a Wish.com leprechaun
Seeking glass? Here’s a grand mirror for your ego
Both are easily shattered, weak, can be fractured, and feeble

You’re an alchemist, churning out gold with your magic
Though, a tantrum’s your only explosive reaction
Tragic… You’re literally a mini-me
Found him in the Faustian Bargain Bin for free

Speaking of Faust, anything you might add?
Please kill yourself. I wish that I had.
Well said, but he’s already done that
How many breakdowns can one have til he breaks down to one half?

rump and The Queen

Bring a friend, he’ll catch the strays I send ya
Think your alias: I’m boutta take out fellas 
Cause I rise above you both, same as Gretchen
And we’re both getting rid of babies... hey queen, tell em!

What
I won’t give you my child, fuck off
Go away and pick on someone your own size, a dog

I am, though he’s not just a poodle, he’s a butler and slave
You see, it’s funny how this wingman has fallen from grace 
Took Greek mythology dames to profit off fame by dropping their names?
I’d never, and I swear it on my own grave!

meph

Ah, names, right. Yours was… unimpressive
It was something witless like… dumbass dipshit
Or nutsack nitwit…! Ah, that must’ve been it!
grrRR IT’S RUMPELSTILtskin- oh FUCK I BIFFED IT

So Faust my dear friend, how shall we end this garden gnome?
I dunno… make his heart explode…
Yes… but afterwards you’ll get to have your baby as well
When I send you to work in eternal labour in Hell… 

wait wait waIT AAIT WAIT WIAT AGHHHHH - pop!


so this is in my anti slump era where i was just really going thru it and needed some outlet to take my mind off things, so one day i just opened a doc and went off and this was the result. i think that mindset of like, writing whatever i wanted w/o even thinking of what comes after sorta helped a lot for my mental, and i like, actually had fun writing? for once? lol

on like an actual critical analytical level im sure the characterization and accuracy for both guys are like, 95% off, but i liked playing up and flanderizing their personas for the rap battle, it really helps with the dynamic and just makes things easier to deal w on my end which makes sense if im just writing to write lol. like, i fucked up a couple of punchlines and if i were to revisit this id just like, fix those, but overall i like the little gimmick i did, the whole rumpelstiltskin name thing and dying. very fun very silly and helped a lot with clearing mental fog

Rumpelstiltskin VS Mephistopheles - 12 Bars of Dissmas #10

ChayseVA as Mr.Fox 
Leo Barqui) as Mr.Wolf 
WeThink as Mr.Snake 
Whozphantom as Mr.Shark  
WeThink as Mr. Piranha 
Cover and CoverArt by TomPuffs
Written by WeThink & Everon 
Mixed by Zagranis

Mr. Fox: 0:12-0:23
There’s no need to battle, thought we already solved this 
He’s simply wild, I’m civilized, Cannis Lupus, Vulpes Vulpes 
Let me go, cuz we know you don’t want to cause any hurt for real 
So why don’t you just flee the scene, isn’t that your whole ordeal 

Mr. Wolf: 0:24-0:58
(Yeahhh) 
Sorry, but we all know, your rapping is just not right…
What? We’re the Bad Guys , you know we have to steal the spotlight (tho) 
Glad you’ve grown else you would’ve browned yourself on sight 
And I’m sorry but I’m no one to throw a bone in this dog fight 

Now let’s review why I’m better than you
Got better lives for my crew, you ruined the ones of all  that you knew
Hey Mr Snake. What should we try on this tyke? 
He’s more my kind with how he lies to his wife 

Way to break your family, cause you feeling like a geezer 
Don’t want to die in a hole? then stop diggin’ yourself deeper 
Diane’s also a thief but with how I carry the mic 
You both are foxes, yet I feel I am the bigger stereo-type 

Mr. Fox: 0:59-1:20
Are you cussing with me? (Grrr), want to take that risk?
When Society left you in the mud, at the mercy of pigs? 
Your thug act falls apart with a pat in the hands 
So come back with a better pack and save Webbs for the hacks  (Hey!) 

You’re just a cute puppy, so wag your tail, sit and listen 
It’s Kinda funny, of course the wolf would blow the mission 
You’re no criminal mastermind more misunderstood rebel 
As you’re biggest crime still, is that godawful Christmas special 

Mr.Wolf: 1:21-1:26
You went on one last job that you hid from your missus, it’s
So weird….the poor thing was just your initiative


Mr. Fox: 1:27-1:32
Shift the blame on each other when it won’t go your way
You draw conclusions, yet don’t know the art of escape


Mr. Shark: 1:33-1:39
Wait, he’s scared of wolves, either that or he’s very miffed.
When I spoke to him as one, I mean, even his pants were pissed.
Mr. Wolf : 1:40-1:44
hey! You still got the loot, congrats on not completely failing 
But still it’s an important loss to somehow still get the tail end (Puto!)

Mr. Fox: 1:45-1:57
Cuss, what a drag, and I’m one sly crook, but 
They gave me Marmalade’s task, to make The Bad Guys look good
And sorry as I don’t wanna sound rude 
but you're terrible at being bad, and even worse at being good 
(*Mr.Fox’s whistle*)

Mr.Wolf vs Mr.Fox-Rap Battle!  ft. Leo Barqui, ChayseVA & Whozphantom

TheMonarchy as Feathers McGraw 
ThanosQuack as Untitled Goose Game 
Mixed by Kaewoo 
CoverArt by WhozPhantom 
Beat by Requiem Beatz 
Art by Molliebendite & ACE
Special thanks to Grasman & GreenOwl 

Lyrics: 

McGraw: 
Feathers McGraw, most foul mind Britain’s seen 
Keeping up with the crimes as he now steals the scene 
From this inconspicuous ballbusting gander 
Out here stealing millions you just get bread from grandmas 


Ruffle feathers with McGraw soon you’ll be dead & gone 
I will only need my glove and then I’ll make a Chicken Run (and) 
I find it ironic who you bite off greater 
Cuz You only be a Goat in a Simulator 
(On guarde)

So I’ll beg my pardon as you’re decimated  
Verbally of course, rest we shall see later 
I’ve got some serious heat, that is the proof you lose 
So get down! Duck Duck Goose 

Untitled Goose Game: 
Oh snap! The nun turned out to be strapped 
But hasn’t considered the fact, nobody fucking asked! 
If all you you do is squawk then leave it to the ducks 
Keep the Blue Diamond I got bofa (bofa?) both-a-deez nuts 

“I’m ballbusting” yap yap yap yap 
Whatever bro just put the Beets in bag 
A thousand gnomes couldn’t cover your thousand yard stare
“I almost got the bag” dude NOBODY CARES 

So L +Ratio 
Stay trapped in the zoo while I wander every pond every patio
This penguin is crazy, bro thinks he Cobblepot 💀
Fitting for someone so deadpan to end bottled up 

McGraw :
Quiet you, we shan’t see what happens when I choose violence 
You should take notes from my playbook and embrace silence 
I’ll leave your burrow burrowed and ransack your House House 
You’ll go south out of season, this goose is cooked now 
 
A verbal murder, my first bird on bird crime 
This Goose couldn’t help, fell shorter than its play time 
I’m done stealing the battle, and while it was delightful 
Shows why I remain unrivaled and you’ll stay Untitled 


Untitled Goose Game: 
Oh you’re dangerous a criminal we get it 
But the best you got still is waaay too many edits 
I get hoes, I get bread, money and the Crown as well 
Switch it to the ring and that means I’ll hear no bell 

Cuz I stole it, now it’s in my burrow shining bright 
Like that smooth clay that will go extinct with the times 
Fits that a fly less bird doesn’t land but just crash and burn 
You’re left without your ice what happens when Penguins Turn (Honk!)

Feathers McGraw vs Untitled Goose Game- Rap Battle! ft. TheMonarchy & ThanosQuack

Puss in Boots

Fear me if you dare I’m Puss in Boots! 

I'm a versatile cat, you're a loosey goose!

I'm a living legend, I faced down death!

You're a fat house pet, who puts John in debt.


If you've come for a bounty, you won’t leave alive 

Like your ratings when movie reviews took a dive

I see no need to continue, let me drink my leche

Antes de que me convierta en tu muerte


Garfield 

Zzzzzz(snoring) oh is it my turn to rap?

Against a cat, who doesn’t even have the claws to scratch(Puss in Boots-Prrrrr)

Your a Has-been legend time to hang up those boots 

You got 9 lives? More like 9 bad reboots


You got ditched like your marriage when you got softpaws

Then scratched up an ogre ordered by his father in law

You scrambled your friendships now, who's the bad egg?

Now If you think I’m all ears than I’m straight up death 


Puss in Boots

Me sorprende que tu hambre de victoria es poca 

La historia del gato con diabetes contra el gato con botas 

Yo soy peligroso, tus ataques no me dañan , 

me robé el escenario, tu te atragantas con lasaña 


Garfield

Zzzzz OH! We’re still going?

Let me switch my flow just how switched with a donkey

Joined three diablos that was a no no

And this why…..why um zzzzzzzzz (Puss in boots

!Ay, Díos mío!)

https://youtu.be/GXZBEKUHQiI?si=faUz8EWxXcLaKwSf


Puss in Boots-Cyancoat

Garfield-Thanosquack

Writing-Aj,We think

Mixing-Jort

Demo-Captain Jorge

Beat-Andrey Rossi



Puss In Boots vs. Garfield- Quick Rap Battles (Ft.CyanCoat, ThanosQuack)

prod by SAINT-DROP

than

I’ve conquered galaxies
Stars and planets kneel before my massive fleets
All is grasped between my palms so Ganon’s region is not worth vanquishing
You’re called calamity incarnate? That’s the name they oughta had for me
Cause if you reincarnate, then this body’s guaranteed

Your power’s so finite
Only spanning three timelines
You’ve been a bore in my eyes
And I don’t mean the swine kind
You’d die twice when you and a child fight
But I’ll help rewind time
You then got a fresh start when you met your demise like

You hide in fortresses til a half-pint warrior kills ya
Just a sitting duck when you have no Courage and Wisdom
You’ve only ever had Power, cause when it’s in my hands
You’ll end up just as empty and barren as your own desert land

gan

Pity… for an Eternal, you’ve no eternal youth
I get purple too, but only when I look at you
Horrid creature, being born a leader is what I’m suited to
It’s my birthright, something that you couldn’t do

Girlfriend’s a skull head, I’d say he’s just as dense
Cause this weak man can’t see that he’s slave to all her whims
So much cowardice that now his own face has gotten split
Cause you’re an ace at being able to take it on the chin

You can’t conquer - any star that you find
When Nebula’s your daughter - and you’d toss her aside
And you nearly ruled the cosmos - but you thought your - artifact died
So go on and have mine, for YOU just seem to LOSE power all of the time

than

(*thanos gets the power triforce and uses it to complete the infinity gauntlet*)

You just made a mistake. A grave one.
The Cosmic Cube then or your Triforce now won’t shape up
So cough up your armies and squadrons
Ironic, I slaughter your gauntlet of bosses with a gauntlet

(*thanos starts fuckin, bashing shit round hyrule with the gauntlet*)

With how you store your currency
You can’t afford my mercy
When your rainbow shards are scattered far and they get lost in random pots until a boy goes burgling
In the homes he lurks in
So I’ll show him what a REAL home invasion’s got

All of your goblins and Lizalfos’ get chopped to death 
And it’s obvious to me that any sort of Guardians aren’t a threat
You’re a lunatic, your planned purge was flooding the damn Earth?
I’ll do Hyrule a favour and snap - before you snap first

(*thanos snaps*)

gan

I applaud and laugh! You left my army halved!
But they’re only there to ensure I get a proper match
You really dare to split me in two? You’ll see me halved then…
Cause now you’re talking to GANON

(*ganondorf kinda just doesnt care and turns ganon*)

Some rodent left your MASSIVE ASS FLAT
So if you’ve mastered betrayal, you’re better AS A DAMN RAT 
I’m the only person that you CANNOT BACKSTAB
Cause you’re no rival, I’ve a dark side THAT YOU CAN’T MATCH

But Thanos, know I’m thankful for the crafts and forces that you’ve brought
For after your defeat, your men will fall under my grand control
To have the stars and beyond is a chance I hold
But first I now command you all to bow before Ganondorf, your brand new lord

(*ganon takes control of thanos’ fleet and goes on a big space adventure :3*)


hi! welcome back to a new different version of rosenthal battles where i sort of just dont give a shit about anything past the demo stage because i cba!

this specific battle was inspired by this one battle rapper named jey the nitewing, who is like the definition of aura, so i wanted to write a battle that sorta encapsulates the mad king energy. some other battlers that inspired this writing were dizaster and real sikh on ganon’s side, but this is mainly inspired by jey in general.

for this battle i wanted to focus on setting a tone of like “you dont fuck around w these guys” and the substance of the disses sorta suffered from that, but ermm i kinda uhh dont care lole. hopefully i was able to deliver what i wanted thru the writing and performance, but im just glad knowing that i was able to pay good tribute to the mad fucking king 👑

Thanos VS Ganondorf - Scrapped Battles of Whatever

Full video coming later this year (Hopefully September).

Kurobane Azia as Cirno
Snakebite126 as Papyrus
Writing by AshleyMagica
Beat by Diamond Style
Mixing by Jort
Temporary cover art by TheToppo

Cirno:
Cower before my might, ‘cause I am the brightest!
Like a yokai-shaped lamp - I could fool you without hiding
I’m magical, adaptable, you know I’m a natural
Try and capture the ice fairy? You’d only catch a cold

Now students, here’s a math problem:
Five royal guards face off with me - the strongest 
Subtract all the ones that got slaughtered
‘Cause Papyrus was their only option
Aren’t you supposed to get buried when it’s dogs and bones, kid?
Anyway, who’s left to defend from the one whose heart’s so frozen?
The answer is zero! There are no royal guards in Snowdin!

And you haven’t gone yet, but I predict that your lines are written in Papyrus script 
You should try a different font, ‘cause to me, that’s like Egyptian hieroglyphs
I got more fans, ‘cause I’m cooler! They wrote you hate mail, now I’m sending it
Let me spell it out for you: those are the only letters you’ll ever get

Papyrus:
THIS IS GENSOKYO’S STRONGEST? MY, YOU SURE FELL FAR
YOU’RE SO ILLITERATE, YOU CAN’T HANDLE YOUR OWN SPELL CARDS
AND WHEN THIS JUNIOR’S JUMBLED, YOU SOB LIKE, “WAHHH! IT AIN’T FAIR!”
THEY NAMED A DAY AFTER YOU? THEY SHOULD’VE NAMED A DAYCARE

YOU’RE A PAWN FOR ZUN’S GREED! YOU DARE CALL ME THE MONSTER?!
HE MILKS YOUR NAME SO MUCH, YOU SOLD OUT TO DAIRY SPONSORS
CHIRUMIRU HAS NO SAUCE, SO I’LL GO BACK TO MY PASTA
AND FURTHERMORE… SKELETONS CAN’T CATCH COLDS, YOU BAKA!

Cirno:
HEY, BACK OFF! I’m not six nor am I sixteen! I’m sixty!
I’m not your type, you sick creep! I know with children, you like getting Frisky
And despite living in snow, you reek of flop sweat
Carry my fairy status with pride, while you’re a skeleton in the closet 

Maybe try Chirumiru - it strengthens your gains
It’s good for your bones, and it’s the best thing you ever did taste
Besides that kid’s blade that got you sent to your grave
You’ll never change that human’s genocidal ways by giving them a friendly embrace
Couldn’t keep your head in the game
So you got reduced to a head in your game

Papyrus:
WHY, YES! YOU’RE AN EXPERT WHEN IT COMES TO GENOCIDAL TOLLS
THE POINT I’M MAKING IS: YOU SHATTER POOR ANIMALS INTO ICICLES
AS A ROYAL GUARD, IT’S MY DUTY TO WARN THE FROGGITS!
PAINT ME AS THE VILLAIN? I BET YOU’RE JEALOUS OF THEM ‘CAUSE YOU CAN’T MAKE THAT LEAP IN LOGIC

I SEE YOUR VILLAGE HAS COME TO REPORT A PROBLEM
THEY SAY YOU’VE ACCRUED A FORM MORE MONSTROUS…
WAIT! DID YOU JUST MAKE THAT CLAIM BECAUSE THAT ONE TIME, YOU WERE DRAWN WITH DARK SKIN?!
THAT’S YOUR CUE TO LEAVE, 9-BALL - YOU’RE OUT OF POCKET

DID YOU SEEK ME JUST BECAUSE THEY BROUGHT POTENTIAL RECRUITS OUT?
YOU THINK 9 COMES AFTER 2 - I HARDLY THINK YOU’D COUNT
JUST A LAUGHINGSTOCK WHO GOT THROWN OUT OF KEINE’S SCHOOLHOUSE
THAT’S GENSOKYO’S SPECIAL ATTACK! YOU ARE BLUE NOW!

Cirno vs Papyrus - AM Rap Battles

► CREDITS:

Sanpie as Azula

TAFox as Ursa 

Snakebite126 as "Mighty Steel Leg" Sing

JustGamer as "Golden Leg" Fung

Written by Theme Park Avenue

Edited by Theme Park Avenue

Azula Art by 3ple

Beat Prod. by Midex
 
Mixed by GlitchDude

Beat Arranged by Theme Park Avenue & GlitchDude

Cover Art by JK03
 

► LYRICS:

Azula Verse 1 

Greetings, I’m Princess Azula of the Fire Nation
And you’re the second monk I’ll leave annihilated

Now, I could have lied and claimed I wanted you on my team
But I only flatter people who are useful to me

I see your story in your eyes, and your shoes, you were poor before your tournament
And you don’t have the power I was born with

And you’re a thief, I’m calling timeout on your vile life
And I won’t be penalized, ruling’s my divine right


Shaolin Soccer Verse 1 

(Whistle) Pay attention, it’s your turn!
Oh, uhh… you’re a firebender, right? Well now you’re gonna get burned

And it’s crazy that the Firelord trusted you with his dynasty
You’re 14 years old, and I thought I was in the Minor League


Azula Verse 2

Stick to soccer, you speak worse than Sokka
But that’s not a surprise, so I’ll give you a real shocker

Honestly, you should be grateful, thanks to me, you’re making history
As you’ll be the first soccer player who’s not faking injuries


Interlude 

My power is coming back, I can feel it

Kill him


Steel Leg Verse 2 

I use martial arts for every kind of practical function
You just use them for the narrow-minded path of destruction

And your attacks are always just a hair off from being significant 
Your technique doesn’t cut it, maybe next time try a scissor kick

And you’re too serious, you need to try some tai chi or chai tea
Just loosen up like your old friend Ty Lee

If you joined her at the circus you’d give splendid performances
Since your brutal childhood made you quite the mental contortionist


Interlude 

My own mother, thought I was a monster
No, I love you Azula, I do


Azula Verse 3 

Do you think I got to where I am by trusting in others?
Everyone’s scared of me, I wasn’t even loved by my mother

So I used fear to sway an army, then we started getting things done
Screw being down-to-Earth, I brought down the Earth Kingdom!

I’m perfect! I don’t even smear my makeup when I have a fight
While your disgusting girlfriend looks like she lost in an Acne Kai

And she’s your strongest player? You’re all dead if you don’t pledge to me
Your coach’s leg is broken, and I’ll still ensure he bends the knee

I’m everything my father ever wanted in a daughter
I have conquered, fought, and slaughtered in his honor

While my mother always shunned me “No, I love you” No, you saw me as a monster
So I shut out everybody and I’m not just talking soccer


Steel Leg Verse 

Aww, now I feel conflicted about fighting someone mentally unstable
Don’t hold back, Sing, rapping is war

Speaking of which, don’t forget she planned to scorch her world’s equivalent of Hong Kong
I’m not conflicted anymore

Your father never truly loved you, he just treasured your skills
You were his little ball of fire and he bent you to his will

Then he banished your mother and tore your family apart
It’s very clear he wasn’t trained in the marital arts

Your first attack on the Earth Kingdom almost had you killed
I could have broken through that wall with my practice drill

You tried to steal your brother’s throne and you ended up fettered
So thanks to your failure, he finally caught an heirbender


Azula vs Shaolin Soccer. PowerPoint Rap Battles

Snakebite126 as Nagito Komaeda
Egomanic as Jumbo Josh

Lyrics Written by: Capitan Jorge, Third Coming of Christ, Cidisswo
Additional Writing by: TheToppo
Audio Mixed by Jordy


[Lyrics]:

RAP BATTLE
NAGITO KOMAEDA
VS
JUMBO JOSH
BEGIN

[0:10 - 0:52] Nagito Verse 1 [16 Bars]
I think I am talentless, then I look at this ape
Your only skill's your strength, yet those seem lacking on your game
(ugh) I have heard and I'm aware that I'm the worst
But at least I'm not dumb enough to smash Banban's girl!
Can't even say you're a stepping stone, your garten shows what hopeless is!
Your creepy-ass is going out there holding kids as hostages!
Made out of clay, yet someone should break the mold
'Cause it's clear a worker's lift ain't enough to lift your worker's hopes
(ugh!) You’re fucking shallow, I’d say prepare for your sad death
But I could spend hours stabbing you and you still wouldn’t have depth
Though how much you change sides proves your plot's got more holes
Storytelling ain't your forte, can't even tell humans from dolls
Even if you count mine, your genre is a worse cancer
Compare our robot bears and hand the L to Freddy Fazbear
I know you don't fare well with traps, so say farewell to this trap beat
Taken care of a warehouse, this trashy scare house won' t trap me!

[0:52 - 1:13] Jumbo Josh Verse 1 [8 Bars]
It's Jumbo Josh, brah. You better watch, dude
Want some isolation? Let me take you to my watch room!
To eat your veggies and fruits is what I would tell you
But you feed off attention so eating healthy wouldn't help you!
Your dog got hit by a car, you’re no Family Guy,
Because your parents got fried 40k feet in the sky.
Now you brain’s messed up ever since you lost your mama,
Getting off to Hope, like you got a Crush on Obama.

[1:13 - 1:34] Nagito Verse 2 [8 Bars]
I know I lost my parents, and that I'm just a faker
But it's sadder that this buffoon is a joke to his own creators!
(Haha!) Your watchroom ain't shit compared to Jabberwock
When a fucking jellyfish and a cat are your worst opps!
  It’s funny you think you can leave a scratch on me
When the last thing that crushed on you left injuries on your body!
Though, didn’t think anyone would look at this thing and obsess, 
Since you treat your own friends and women like objects!

[1:34 - 2:15] Jumbo Josh verse 2 [16 Bars]
(Uh!) Seems this time you failed at bringing down the house with fire!
(Uh!) Only gas you’re lighting is to your friends, you big liar!
You're just hopeless and hoeless, know the answer, bro?
'Cause your crush on Hinata turns Jabberwock to Jabberwoke!
You worship the talented, knowing you're not shit
But I know my words won't hurt you more than you already did
The way you talk ‘bout hope makes it seem like it's something you own
But your beliefs fall flatter than how I'd leave your bones
Got a million diseases, now your frail body’s dropping
Next time you’re in an octagon, I’ll make sure it’s your coffin
I'm rolling in the green, while you dress like a hobo 
I took the scene where you died and watched that shit in slo-mo
I'm a cold blooded unaliver and you got me pissed
So I'll take my fists and pulverize a twink to red mist
After I crush you flat, I'm leaving with a massive grin
Cause now Garten Of Banban just took a Jumbo-sized win!

Jumbo Josh VS. Nagito Komaeda - Cidisswo Rap Battles

Moxxie : Moash Bolt
Dr Flug : Kamren

Blitzo : Ego
Millie : Toodlesthemaid
Black Hat : Dboy
Demencia : Kat Toony

Written by Dboy 
Additional help from Kamren
Beat Prod : VANNN
Mixed/Mixing : Jort
Custom "RAP BATTLE" Logo: Jort

Moxxie :
Oh crumbs... What is this, Paperbag Man’s second cousin?
Huh? (I'm confused)- He’s got clones of his boss in the dozens?
Not sure that we even properly match in this matchup 
I’m professional, your crew kills by being consistent fuck-ups
I’ve read your resume, although I do have some notes
Notably that your “Villainous” acts? They’re nothing to boast
Defeated some scrawny supers, and your ads- nobody hears those!
I understand why your company has problems… with- heroes. (Shit!- Wait- um-)
Blades n’ bullets, explosions n’ death rays, marksman Imp V Brainiac with no skill grade
Keeping company with my lovely honey, I'm the only worker here seeing a payday
Organized organization, yet when facing threats, the doctor hides, silent
Miss Heed had the right idea, we’re simply interested in other clients

Dr Flug :
O-oh! I wasn't expecting a guest today, my apologies
Buuuut I expected an assassin, not, um, w-well
A pistol wielding baby with a possum-like physiology
I may not be from deep-down there, but I can raise hell
Experimenting for the dastardly, devious schemes and cruel machinations
Inject a specimen with cursed concoction, you get injected on a daily basis
Black Hat, that's the organization, IMP, just a speck in the dustbin
Further testing must be collected on this rodent with no family left to trust him
Heard your wife is pregnant, honestly? I'm quite surprised 
Didn't peg you for a family man, good thing Mille’s got your behind
You stay stuck with a bad boss, this pervert- he should be ashamed
It took 2 seasons, you're still a plot device for him, all the same

Moxxie, Millie & Blitzo :
W-Well you- you, um…FUCK, I'm panicking
Aw, c'mon sweetie, this scientist he's an easy kill 
Listen Mox, this bitch gets rocked easily, so keep rambling 
Fuck UP the bagheaded bitch, show off how he’s unskilled (Y-yes sir!)

Dr Flug, Demencia & Black Hat : 
Bleeeehhhh! This songs boring! C'mon, fight, Throw a punch, nerd! 
Wh- Demencia?!? Get out- (FLUG!) Slay this vermin or your deaths assured
If this is what passes for demons these days, I'm disappointed
Soon as Flug is done, all we’ll need is a mortuary appointment 

Moxxie : 
Alright-! listen here you mad scientist charlatan
Make something new to do your job for you, cause you're incompetent
Id say give us a call, but I don't believe were required
Network pulled its own plug, tough luck, now hit the bricks, you’re fired
Quite rude to list off my flaws, Flug was it? I'm unimpressed
Guess it's outta the bag that you're just a villain because you're a reject 
Grudge against a Goldheart, Heed dodged the failure and you left her to rot
Pardon me, but FUCK you, say goodnight to the bad guy via buckshot

Dr Flug :
And just when I thought I had someone new I could relate too
This pathetic imp threw a tantrum, well- scratch that, a few
Looks like crimson red flags run in the family, like your lack of a spine
How’d Millie end up with you? You both caved in to the “Chaz Time”
My pilot took off soaring, you were lucky to even get off the ground
This independent animated imbecile… well he came crashing down
DEMENCIA! (Yea?) Add the imp to my “Incompetent Evildoers” folder
As you end up another crossover that the Black Hat Organization took over!

Moxxie vs Dr.Flug - Rap Battle

Vanes as Roxanne Wolf

TaigaTonic as Claptrap

Beat by Diamond Style
Mixed by: Danii
Written by: TaigaTonic
Thumbnail by: M!CAH
Art by: Xoniq and Snakebite126
Special Thanks: garbageGothic, HazelMoth, JustGamer, TAFox, & Grasman

Roxanne:
You can already hear the fans scream my name while I play
So I thought I told you S.T.A.F.F. bots to stay outta my way!
(Ugh!) Do I really have to deal with more pests
I guess let's get this party started because I AM THE BEST! (YEAH!)

You like to gamble? Fazcade can get you back on track
Cause you took your films budget and put it all on Black
Like Bonnie you were worried about a strike when you dropped the ball
And act surprised when you had realized that you lost it all

Nobody cared for your birthday, so you tried to invite the whole town?
I guess you gotta have moxie, but even she turned you down
Sad, since that open door stays a core part of your life
But blabber bout me to your bandits, It’s all bark and no bite

Claptrap:
How’s it going friend! My name is Claptrap!
And you should know that I’m programmed to spit some phat raps!
But I gotta ask, cause my servers still needs to wake up
Why does a final product need to be made up with makeup?

All it took was 1 kid before you started getting bothered
“It's all bark and no bite” Until you’re tearing up toddlers
Then you're tearing in the mirror cause the “wannabe’s” don't like you
If that's how you treat yourself, then I don’t wanna be like you

But OF COURSE you were appealing to no one but lonely dweebs
Cause this dumb dog playing rough is what kept them on a leash
You're not that much of a bad ass, so this will be your last act
Cause you have fallen TO THE GREAT ALMIGHTY CLAPTRA-AHHHH

Roxanne:
GOD you're so annoying no wonder everyone grew bitter
Since a best friend dies and people treat you like the mood killer (Hey Friend?)
If some losers hadn't shown sympathy you wouldn't get far (Buddy…)
Cause you- HEY! WHAT! Look out for the (AH-) (crash sfx) kart…

Get this through your head, you're a screw up and know its true
Blew up Overlook cause no one cared to look over you
And once the townspeople thought you couldn't make things worse
You started burning bridges and killed everyone in the church

You’re pathetic! So every team wanted to do nothing but rid you
And you scrapped up your love life, just for it to also ditch you
When it blew up in your face no one was standing there with you
So when you're staring at a barrel, know nobody’s gonna miss you

Claptrap:
At least I’m not the garbage that your fans like to eat up
Cause I’m covered in less grease than a single slice of your pizza
I mean is that the shit that you've been dishing out this whole time?
If beauty’s in the eye of the beholder, NO WONDER you went blind (HA!)

You always wanted to have your big break in the spotlight
But your time for a photo finished the second that you got sidelined
Thought you could mask your loss with more makeup but the truth is
You're just another hunk of junk, now your foundation’s in ruins

And nobody wants to see your ass on the stage
So you can… BEEP BOOP while I BOOP BEEP on your grave
Now I leave to squabble with the rest of my minions
Cause my greatness was something you couldn't rise from the Mimic


Mr.Wolf vs Mr.Fox-Rap Battle! ft. Leo Barqui, ChayseVA & Whozphantom

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