Luna just caught her first mouse. It happened to be a computer mouse. She clawed at the cable of the Razer gaming mouse I bought to play Elden Ring with. I have no need for a phone anymore. I gave that away to Gypsy. Gypsy has her dog Tuesday sit on my lap today as we spoke about unmentionable things that happened to her, and to those she loved. She’s a beautiful homeless woman who lives “down by the river.” Yes, that Chris Farley SNL skit is true.

One thing that we barely went through today was why. Why does she need MY phone. Well that gets to a dream. I had a dream last night that Henry Red Cloud was yelling at me from Pine Ridge, South Dakota saying, “Why the hell did you just waste six years of your life doing nothing?” Did you expect anyone to give you a fucking cent to save the world that everyone already knows is fucked from the start?

Luna is pounding her head against the laptop screen, resting ever so gently behind my keyboard. When I write with her in my presence I am not alone. She makes me laugh. I am in love with a black female cat. She reminds me of being a child again. If I was not so jaded and tired. Before the reams of depressive black metal in my twenties, interspersed with chemistry graduate school mental rape. Where I first learned that I was not human. I AM NOT A HUMAN BEING.

That is a really great Lil Wayne album.

william erbil