“Every man carries with him through life a mirror, as unique and impossible to get rid of as his shadow.” – W.H. Auden

Using the symbolism of a mirror is a great tool in discovering yourself. Your flaws, insecurities, strengths, weaknesses, highlights and influences. Many things can be known when you take the deeper dive into who you are; at your very core, soul and being. Mirrors can reflect equally, then can make small things large or large things small. Being able to look deep into myself through every small meticulous detail to the obtruding images has been a personality quirk I’ve carried with me my whole life. I’m grateful to be able to look in that mirror and sometimes gaze into an abyss, but most often I learn what I can, pull myself out and change the things I can to align with a better version of myself.

The ability to self analyze is a strong tool in our utility belt, to be able to navigate this life.

Beat produced, song mixed and mastered by Jacobi Beatz.
Lyrics by Billy Redd the Kidd.

LYRICS:

CHORUS
Mirror mirror 
reflection so clear,
Magnify the small, confusion dissapears,
Mirror mirror
Inside us all, showing us our fears, in the glass I see the things of past falling in my tears, 

VERSE 1
Time is too slow for those who wait,
Too fast for the grave,
Time is the master we the slaves, 
Pastor says all we have to do is pray,
Reflection clearer reflecting what I made,
You ever stand in a mirror and feel ashamed?
Feel the hate placed shackles up your chains, feel the weight, mistakes you ever made, all you did was try to walk straight,
Bodies drop chalk and tape, 
demons stare you in the face,
Life pass like seasons the change puts you in your place, 

VERSE 2
can’t believe what you seeing, you free or fleeing or fiending, criticize your own being, demons rest in Eden for a reason,
I’m a heathen with my legions of  self treason, self seeking,
In the mirror I start to find myself treating,
I’m weakened beaten bleeding in all extremes,
The seas seeping through the trees,
Shaking in my knees,
Give me reason give me meaning,
Lord please shine your light on me through this mirror that I needed, 
Lord please give mirrors to start to set me free,

Reflection Into The Soul

“To be, or not to be: that is the question: 
Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer 
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, 
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles, 
And by opposing end them? To die: to sleep; 
No more; and, by a sleep to say we end 
The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks 
That flesh is heir to, ’tis a consummation 
Devoutly to be wish’d. To die, to sleep; 
To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there’s the rub.” - William Shakespeare 

I’ve experienced the spectrum of suicide and suicide thoughts in my life. Through my self, through fellow Marines and through family. In a time of desperation, me and my cousin choose to express our feelings about the topic of suicide; and inward to outward expression on what we felt.
Suicide challenges beliefs we have grown up with. Importantly the belief that Suicide is a sin and if committed you’d be throwing your soul into eternal damnation. But God is all-loving, all merciful and filled with grace; why would he punish us for feeling so low we might off ourselves? And if he doesn’t, and he is all forgiving of our sins because his one and only son died on the cross and shed his blood(forgiving us of our sins); wouldn’t we be saved if we ended our life? If that’s the case why not OD today? We would wake up in peace, or never wake at all. Still a peace far better then the peace we could ever achieve in this world. 

This song just poses the question and helps remind me of my feelings and beliefs at a time when I was so far into the abyss I couldn’t see a way out.

If your thinking about self harm in any way call 9-8-8, or you may give me a message on SoundCloud and we can talk about things. I’d like to listen.

Song was produced, mixed and mastered, as well as chorus written and preformed by Billy Redd The Kidd. The first and second verse was written and preformed by Warlord Daddy.

LYRICS:

“Yknow I just wanted that comfort so bad, it was rough.” (Mac Miller)

CHORUS (Billy Redd The Kidd)
Pull my lid back thinking bout the Snap-back,
Thinking bout putting my brains on Snapchat,
Should I write a note?
Or should I comatose?
Should I clear some space and put up the rope?
Should I press the barrel to my mothafuckin nose?
Who will wrap for me?
My funerals got hoes, put inbetween my teeth pull the trigger close,
All you heard was the, all you heard was the, blow.

VERSE 1 (Warlord Daddy)
I said what’s up buttercup blow my face to smithereens,
A blood bender vengeance and rage, you gon run and scream,
Waiting for my birthday so I can peel my cap,
Hitting up his line but God don’t hit me back,
Asking for forgiveness, his people won’t do that,
You can rape, murder, steal and he’ll still give you daps,
Once the self loathing hits you get stabbed in the back,
Blow your brains out n get left with the rats,
I wanna meet my god but he won’t give me that,
If I expedite my journey he’s gonna send me back,
Lock me up in purgatory send me to hell,
I just need to find me a safe place to dwell,
Aching for a heaven, walk around in a shell,
Gaze into the darkness dive in that well,
When the abyss reaches out we’ll let that ship sail,

“I didn’t wake up very happy.” (Mac Miller)

VERSE 2 (Warlord Daddy)
Yeah, when it comes to death, we don’t know a thing,
The pope says something and we live by that dream,
It’s a pardonable sin, man can’t you see?
You could OD today and be living with some queens,
Fishing in a pond, gold swan, and your team,
God loves everybody not just the Gs,
He has a massive plan and he knew all these things will come into fruition, so just let it be,
The real question is baby, who you gon believe?
When the reaper comes knocking and you know it’s time to leave,
Grab his bony hands and go with ease,
He’ll take you to a place where you can finally be,
Free amongst all the birds and bees,
Gentle winds caressing the trees,
Big bootied angels fly around the scene
Platinum bongs and careless dreams
When it’s my time, man, let me be
Man, let me be
Just let me be
Let me be

Pardon ft. Warlord Daddy

“Even if you have got nothing else left, be proud of your relationship with God.” – Sunday Adelaja

My cousin once taught me a very valuable lesson. Stick to yourself. He said, “you got yourself and you got god, that’s a lot that a lot of people don’t have, be grateful you got that because that’s all you need in this life.”
It’s true at the end of the day we are all gonna be dead. What matters is this life. Things in life are always gonna be moving and changing, but the things that last, are you and god; until you end up in that casket.
Appreciate yourself. Love yourself for your flaws and imperfections. Everyday the only two you have to deal with is yourself and god; until the end of days.

Beat produced, vocals mixed, mastered and recorded by Bobby Suesse. Lyrics and recording preformed by Billy Redd The Kidd.

Voice sample excerpt from Denzel Washington.

LYRICS:

CHORUS:
One man one god one casket,
Everything I fought, it’s the only thing that’s lasting,
One man one god one casket,
I’m glad through it all that Its forever lasting,

VERSE 1:
I could have it all or I could have nothing,
got myself and god, that’s something,
rushing into loving, Not bluffing my heart is crushing gushing blood,
And it’s my fault cause I forgot who I was, 
lost my path, put all my eggs in one basket,
at the end of it all, my flesh will be in that casket, people left above ground some crying and some laughing, 
silver lines cracking in the mirror,
Distortions and illusions, laughing through the tears,
moving and grooving smashing through all my fears,
Only thing I can trust is what’s in between my ears, 
One man one god one casket, 
keeps me strong through the years,
Higher in peace then all my peers,
pride is talking that’s something I used to fear,
But I breathed so much evil Finally taste the air, 
Looking through the eye of a needle and decided I need prayer, 
All these tears in what I wear, the people tryna trap me in snare, 

VERSE 2:
You can burn me up till I’m ashes, or lock my cold body in a casket, open casket funeral so you see can see me without a mask n,
Same peace in death I seek throughout my life,
For the last breath I take, I won’t think things twice, I won’t have no regrets and I’ll die without spite, it’s a shame you left, but god damn that’s your right, I won’t hold the blame or hold my breath cause god damn that’s life, 
Everything and everyone gonna want you to move so so fast, go go go and go until you finally take that crash, but take the time to be slow and enjoy the vast mass of life while every second past,
You can laugh or cry, but yo ass shouldn’t be thinking bout the past, 
I ask the lord in mass what are the only things that last?
One man with one god, laying in one casket,
In one hand you have all and in the other hand you have fragments, 
To be all is to be you and nothing else Is granted,
One man one god one casket,
Everything I fought, the only things that’s lasting,
One man one god one casket,
Don’t put all your eggs in one basket,
One man one god one casket,
I’m glad through it all it’s forever lasting,

https://youtu.be/YNqmS1OoSV4

Forever Lasting

Expirimental Dark Intro

Relapsing Through the Veil

Medoso

Basically how I look at the tragedy of blues and poverty/struggle through eyes of schizophrenia.

Behind Emerald Eyes

ARCO ft. Lil TKYO

Bluez

Hallelujah

Pushing P: Peace, Patience, Productivity, Purpose and Perseverance.

Check out Forever Lasting on YouTube!