ALL MUSIC WRITTEN, PRODUCED, RECORDED, AND PERFORMED BY YESTERDAY UNLESS FURTHER CREDITED

Forget Forever
DRUMS WRITTEN BY JORDAN DAVIS
Self Respect
DRUMS WRITTEN BY JORDAN DAVIS
Promise Everything
DRUMS WRITTEN BY JORDAN DAVIS
Torn
DRUMS WRITTEN BY JORDAN DAVIS
Somebody Who'd Never Come
DRUMS WRITTEN BY JORDAN DAVIS
Take Flight
DRUMS WRITTEN BY JORDAN DAVIS
Don't Get Too Close
DRUMS WRITTEN BY DYLAN ZALINK
GUITAR & BASS WRITTEN + RECORDED + PERFORMED BY JOSEPH STONEBACK
CO-PRODUCED BY JOSEPH STONEBACK
Does It Ever Get Easier?
DRUMS & BASS CO-WRITTEN BY JOSEPH STONEBACK

ALBUM ARTWORK BY JEROME
LYRICS IN THE DESCRIPTION OF EVERY SONG

Follow me <3

Bits And Pieces

Drums written by Jordan Davis

LYRICS
I see you cryin out
Promise everything to me
And take it all away

This isn't my fault
We're at the last stop
Cards on the table
You blew your only shot
Willing, unable
To see past yourself
So now you reap the consequences that you've permanently sown
And I don't wanna call
No more settling the score
If love's just a fucking game, I'm not playin anymore
My arm's bruised and feeling sore
And your knuckles look so bloody
I don't think you're foolin anybody anymore

Promise everything to me
And take it all away

Promise Everything

Drums written by Jordan Davis

LYRICS:
Sit down on the curb, wait for me outside
Out here it gets cold like a bucket of ice
How's it feel to be found on the other side
Of this outplayed game that you keep me tied down to?
The money that I've got keeps me high and fine
But this world that we live in's got me dead inside
I never asked for a lot, except your heart and mind
But I don't want that anymore
So I'll say it one last time

Forget forever
I don't wanna remember
I can barely get by
Just gotta get through December

I'm always reachin for the sky
I'll lose my grip and fall behind
You think you see me but you must be blind
Hindsight's 20/20, just give it some time
Just keep moving along
You'll forget all that was wrong
Just nod your head to the beat of this song
And know that I'm the one you needed all along
BUT I'M DONE

I'm sick of waitin for a chance, so Imma take what's mine
Another failure, chalk it up to a waste of time
I'm sure you're sorry, but I'm makin every choice for me
Yeah, you can miss me when I'm layin in the soil beneath your feet

Forget Forever

Drums written by Jordan Davis

LYRICS:
I lost my self respect when I gave you one more chance
Can't help my indulgence
I hate myself more than you could ever comprehend
You stand tall, that high horse
Comes crashing down on my head
Sweet relief, I'm craving 
Some sense of purpose that I'm never gunna get

At least I know what I lack
Fell off then got back on track
Laid down and let that train pass
I felt it destroy my chest
With my last breath
I curse you to the same fate you put me through
I'd rather spend my whole life alone
Than keep up with this damn misery you've grown to hold

I lost my self respect when I gave you one more chance
I'd rather spend my whole life alone
Than keep up with this damn misery you've grown to hold

Self Respect

Drums written by Jordan Davis

LYRICS:
I'm so stuck in my ways
You don't need me the same way that I need you
Still torn like a page
Thought you read every line, how'd you tear right through?

How'd you tear right through me
Like I'm a single page?
You really thought you knew me
But then forgot my name
You like me starved and lonely
And I just love your taste
No, you can't control me
I'll move at my own pace

I'm still torn like a page
No time for grief in my days
You like to keep it around
Like I'm something to be saved
But there's no weight to your words
I pick that up right away
You don't deserve all of me
I think it's best we forget

Torn

Drums written by Jordan Davis

LYRICS:
If you got a single minute to spare
I'd love to hear about what you've been up to this year
Haven't saw you since you told me I'm not worth the despair
Every day I thought about the different colors you wear

20 shades won't keep you covered in the dark or the light
I'm a lover, not a fighter
And your flag's never white
All my failures seem to hit me when I turn off the lights
The edge it tempts me
Wonder if I fall in, will I take flight?

Will I grow a pair of wings just like my father said?
I shouldn't want to test the things
I'll never understand
For all my sins, I'd prolly turn to ash or drown instead
Or be stuck in this cycle
Living with this pain in my head

20 shades to keep you covered in the dark or the light
She's a lover, I'm a fighter
And I never wear white
All my failures seem to hit me when I turn off the lights
The edge, it tempts me
Wonder if I fall in will I take flight?

I'm a ghost of myself
See my past when I look in the mirror
Hollow shell, final wish
I just want somebody to remember
Watched you walk out the door
Felt it fade away
Need to hear your sweet voice
Need to know something
Is this really the last time I'll see you again?

Take Flight

Drums written by Jordan Davis

LYRICS:
Yeah, you sat alone and waited
For somebody who'd never come
He's been too busy gettin sedated
Not even thinkin bout you at all
Puff up your chest and take your medicine
Feeling the sun reminds me where you've been
Missing your touch, avoid the sentiment
Kickin up dust, I think I've settled it
When we're in love you never let me in
Scars on my tongue from every word I've said
And if it cut so deep...

Why don't you get up and walk away for good?
Yeah, I don't know if I could
Now I'm awake all night
Just runnin away from you
I see you sittin all alone
At places we both know
Pickin pedals off the flowers that I gave you

Why can't I just hate you?
Why can't I replace you?
Why do I just want you?

I would if I could, I think you would too
Cut the thorns off your heart
Turn that red to blue
Don't know what to do
All I need is gone

Water your seeds if you want a plant to bloom
Or rip it up from the roots
Told me to speak my truth even if it hurts
I won't go out of here with a single regret
Promise me you'll never go
Like I told you once
I'll never love another soul...

And walk away for good
I never thought that you would
Now I'm awake all night
Just runnin away from you
I see you sittin all alone
At places we both know
Pickin pedals off the flowers that we both grew

Somebody Who'd Never Come

LYRICS:
I'm so cold
Caught underneath the weather
Got no desire to leave my bed today
You would know
How my head hits the ceiling
When I'm holding on to every fleeting feeling

Suffer through every day
Without it I feel pain
This retching in my heart won't go away
Manipulate and shame
Constant anxiety
I'd do it for you
But she can't take herself half way
No it's not fair, love's never been for me
Don't know if I care, that's how its gunna be
Not certain how long I'm gunna last
I'm dead weight and you're just broken glass

The shadows won't let go
I'm losing control
Your arrow cuts through me
I saw from afar
Bruised and spoiled down in the soil
Desecrated by my own turmoil
Spent my life figuring everything out
With a fucked up sense of direction
I'll push you further, don't need no help
I'd rather get lost all by myself
Keep your distance and I'll keep mine
It's for the best, and for the rest of time

Suffer through every day
Without it I feel pain
This retching in my heart won't go away
Manipulate and shame
Constant anxiety
I'd do it for you
But she can't take herself half way
No it's not fair, love's never been for me
Don't know if I care, that's how its gunna be
Not certain how long I'm gunna last
I'm dead weight and you're just broken glass
No it's not fair, love's never been for me
Don't know if I care, that's how its gunna be
Not certain how long I'm gunna last
I'm dead weight and you're just broken glass

Broken Glass

Drums+Bass co-written by Joe Stoneback

LYRICS:
You called it, you saw right through me
Dishonest, that's all that I'll be
I'm trying for you
But your hearts turned dark blue
I can't take what I do
I'm unfolding, à deux

There's nothing to do
When you ain't got a clue
Look how they'll pass you by
Everyone's left you behind

Let your life just pass you by
Work too much, don't have the time
All of this means something to someone
Especially if you make it

What's the point in trying?
I don't understand how it happened
Everybody's dying and I can't do a god damn thing
Doesn't any blame already fall on me?
Is there anything else I can do to change?
Can it be, I'm worthy of all you give?
If it means something then it always lives

Does it ever get easier?
Tell me if it gets easier from here
I don't even understand me
How the hell am I supposed to ever believe you?
Does it ever get easier?
Tell me if it gets easier for you
I don't even understand me
How the hell am I supposed to ever think you do?

Does It Ever Get Easier?

Drums written by Dylan Zalink
Guitar+Bass written, performed, and recorded by Joe Stoneback
Co-produced by Joe Stoneback

LYRICS:
I said a prayer for you last night
Told God to help me make things right
I serve the servants
We don't deserve this
You just make profit off the
Hopes and dreams your lies once told us
Make the cream and meet your quota
You won't go unless I make ya
It's better than being alone
Just don't get too close

I think everybody's out to get me
So I sleep with a gun beside me
Keep it loaded with a couple of things
I need to tell to you
I think everybody's out to get me
So I sleep with a gun beside me
Keep it loaded with a couple of thing
I need to tell to you

Don't turn your back
You just might not
Like what you find
Look straight ahead
You'll be alright
Now keep them shut
This is goodbye
This is goodbye

All of the dreams you said you had
Fell through your grip like grains of sand
The cogs are in motion
You're losing your mind here
Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
Alone with no purpose
A life spent on the surface

"Did you ever think it'd come to this?
Your last confession"
You can't take away from me 
The very thing you tried to be
"40 hour fucking work weeks
No time for what you love"
You can't escape the feeling
That you've wasted half your life away
"Oh god... I can't act okay"
Was it ever really worth it?
Did you even get a chance to play?
"NO!"
This world's got me feelin
"COLD!"
You're 6 feet underwater
Crack the ice, and find your way back home

Don't turn your back
You just might not
Like what you find
Look straight ahead
You'll be alright
Now keep them shut
This is goodbye
This is goodbye
Don't turn your back
You just might not
Like what you find
Look straight ahead
You'll be alright
Now keep them shut
This is goodbye
This is goodbye

Don't Get Too Close

LYRICS:
I find myself in search of a reason to keep giving up
She's got the power to take my mind
I spend my days giving you my life
Right on the hour, I did it again
I'll buy you flowers, make up for sins
I'll keep to myself, in my head
I've seen this all before
I let it happen again

I feel the weight on my head
This life is bringin me down
The sun is shinin but I,
I keep my mind in the clouds
Or am I just underwater
Helpless, waiting to drown?
And who is that in the mirror?
I don't recognize the person I've become

I'm not the person I used to be
Is that somebody you can love?
I'm not the person that I want to be
You should run far from me
And never turn your head back
Every second I am worrying
About the fantasy I make up
Like how I'm so sure that you want to leave
How could you fall for me?
I'm not the only one for you

In fact, I bet you'll find a lie
Between each tooth
Behind my eyes
God only knows the things I hide
The words I don't speak
The lines I ride
Though every moment will pass me by,
I keep my grip on the wheel held tight
My will to last, my drive to thrive
Will dissipate right before your eyes

I feel the weight on my head
This life is bringin me down
The sun is shinin but I,
I keep my mind in the clouds
Or am I just underwater
Helpless, waiting to drown?
And who is that in the mirror?
I don't recognize the person I've become
I feel the weight on my head
This life is bringin me down
The sun is shinin but I,
I keep my mind in the clouds
Or am I just underwater
Helpless, waiting to drown?
And who is that in the mirror?
I don't recognize the person I've become

Down

LYRICS:
I might as well quit now while I'm ahead
Because the only thing that's certain
Is one day I'll end up dead
Sometimes I think I don't feel anything at all
But then I see you in the flesh
And my heart flies right out of my chest

I could say that I'm sorry but you wouldn't believe me
You're too drunk at that party to get in your feelings
I know I'm always wrong, but I must do something right
Cuz you won't go for too long without putting up a fight
My heart goes off like a bomb when everything feels right
If only I could be stronger, I would give you light

Sometimes I don't feel anything at all
And it hurts everybody around me

But she knows I'm tryin
Even when I feel like dyin
I'd do anything for you
Every time I see her
She makes it feel alright
To be completely out of control

I could say that I'm sorry, but you wouldn't believe me
You're too drunk at that party to get in your feelings

Sometimes I Don't Feel Anything At All

music video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-4ctisd4N7Q&ab_channel=yesterday

its hard to believe you
and anything you say
dont take it personally
ill talk to myself for days
and think about the things
you do when youre without me
im self detrimental everyday
find a safe space in my brain
where im alone with you
i can say the things i always wanted to say

trust issues, i wish youd stay
theyre eating me away
trust issues, i wish youd say
something to ease the pain

its like you say things but you mean something else
the barren trees start reaching out to me
as i drive my car through familiar places
the only limits my imagination
when it comes to you
blind faith has proved
that im such a sucker

trust issues

PROD. @anobodyreallY
look out for our collab EP
lyrics:
ive been dreaming of a time
where id sleep with ease at night
take my keys and drive me home
people like me are better off left alone
she doesnt look at me the same
just stares out the window frame
every time i drive her home
through exit signs and parkway tolls
no ill never fucking say, never fucking say
that im not okay, that im not okay
i seem to always find
something wrong
with the things in my life
im a fucking loser
with redeeming qualities
like a doctorates degree in drinking coke and whisky 
and feeling alone in the most crowded places
were working together in the tightest of spaces
im leaving you traces in these ink filled pages i write
youre doing the right thing by keeping your distance
ill take you and break through
then make due with intrests too common for comfort
too cold to collect
it goes without saying 
im better off left alone

better off left alone (prod. ʎpoqou)

prod. @tomorrow

lyrics:
yeah i see you called back
i cant even check that
need a couple months back
i cant even cop that
pull up then get pushed back
i cant even hate that
tears up on my paycheck
i cant even blame that

falling to the bottom of the things that i regret
ignoring all my problems as the grow
im feeling best with drugs up in my system
cuz my man ive been depressed
ive been hanging tight for as long as i remember

crush a pill
break it down
wrap a bill
walk around
with my crown
on my face
i dont smile
only frown
sad boy until i die
kinda hope it ends tonight
tryna find a better life
my hearts been broken a couple of times
my minds still stuck in a pit that she dug
i still smoke blunts
roll em up, and i tuck
my team give way too much of a fuck
my girl dont really care enough
said i take my life too seriously, but i dont feel the same
thats the only way i know
i guess you think lifes just a game

wish that i could grow some wings
id spread them out and fly away
picking pedals off of flowers 
lay them all across my grave
no one wants to talk about the shit that goes inside your brain
i fill mine up with contradictions 
try and smoke away the pain
im so obsessed with bigger pictures
cant just settle for the life i got
thats what ive taught
thats how i brought
these lessons ive forgot
youd think id learn
but still i make the same mistakes
i guess thats whats so comfortable
so i wont even check my phone

tears on my paycheck (prod. tomorrow)

@guccihighwaters
@killedmyself

lyrics:
check the clock, 2 am and i cant sleep
scrollin down our photo album just to see our last week
ghosts up in my bed like you were laying in them last week
counting faces in my head like what you said is on repeat
i hope you feel the same in the morning

she said its over like it couldnt be
who knew itd end so cowardly
cant look me in the eyes
guess my stare is so damn heavenly
her kisses on my neck used to show my love so publicly
i miss her on my chest
like my heart, thats where it used to be
ive sown it on my vest
crawls away just like a centipede
i always tried my best
even that just wasnt good enough
she came through to confess
locked her up and threw away the key
depression will infest
hang me up just like a center piece
eroding at my brain
like she try and put the blame on me
but i never claimed to be
the one you wanted me to be
going through the motions
but i feel fucking emotionless
a minute to get mad, then ill get back to destruction
my head is blowing up just like a volcanic erruption
im always fucking up like an nes corruption
blowing down the ounces like i blow away my brain
i get out to escape from whats causing all this pain
friends and substance i abuse
in hopes to keep me all together
cuz without them i would fucking die
nobody lasts forever

i hope you feel the same in the morning
cus i don’t feel the same way any more bitch
im a ghost watch the rain while its pouring
2am i need u but you’re snoring
i need rest prefer a death bed
i need a hollow tip to penetrate my chest
i need to leave maybe then you’d be impressed
too far gone imma sleep on the grass
i stay lone and i hate it
i hate it
but your lips 
still taste still taste them
like come back ill buy u a gucci bag
u can play ur games if u let me hold your hand
please dont 
(please dont break my heart) 
ohh please dont
well is this not enough of destruction 
my body is sick of convulsing

i hope you feel the same in the morning (ft. guccihighwaters) [prod. killedmyself]

ft: @barrenwaste
prod: @anobodyreally x @cpt_sad

where the fuck are my friends at?
dont bother hitting me up, im busy anyway
where the fuck is my girl at?
100 miles away exploring every frat

getting dubbed like its payback
for all the fucked up shit
that i cant even admit
i dont care im just anxious
we got some plans to be famous
i dont know if i can take this
money good, but the paper faceless
im so useless, didnt choose this
feeling clueless, send me cute pics
like you used to
got a new life
that im getting used to
drunk in my room
like im Free Throw
in the back row
with my hopes up
and my head down low
man im stressed out
getting aquainted with all of my thoughts
hoping ill turn out to be who im not
grabbing a knife just to cut out the coms
my heart in the fridge where i ice out my head
my brain is a mess, id be better off dead
cant fight up the courge to end my own life
but find out the futures got reasons to live
i cannot go, but i wanna bail
burried in woes, to sorrow i hail
i drink from the veil just to swallow my tongue
maybe ill join up the 27 club

where the fuck are my friends at?
dont bother hitting me up, im busy anyway
where the fuck is my girl at?
100 miles away exploring every frat
getting dubbed like its payback
for all the fucked up shit
that i cant even admit
i dont know if i can take this
all my life ive been faceless

yeah i did some things
i don’t want to say
same as for you
so it goes both ways
don’t need this high horse 
you rode on in
its been too fucking long
since you sang the same old song
to try to get my sing along
but don’t you ever try again
im sick of all this patience
that I’ve been always fading
and try to get back
but its never helping that
i can’t understand the relations
between you and i
theres nothing left
but there always something else
that I’m wondering 
why do you always come back
to try to get me in
inside my own head
to try to trick myself
to think i love you again
it always works somehow
until i realize 
its nothing that i want now
its nothing that i need
but you always try to 
convince me

faceless (ft. barren) [prod. ʎpoqou x yesterday]

prod. @blacklunged

these days waking up is getting hard now
i knock the jack back
i pick up what i put down
bad habits comin round like theyre ancient
its no surprise that im gunna need a rain check
not goin out like i dont make anymore plans
sitting in my room, staring at the ceiling fan
wait, whos your mans?
guess i forgot to ask that
you haunt my dreams, i can see you in my flashbacks
i fill my brain with whatever i can find
im self defeating
always wasting all my time
got a 9 to my head, but i swear im fine
im unattached from the little that i call mine

im unnatentive to these bitches like i go to class
reach for the holster, load it up, and then i cock back
up to my dome, running frantic like my last lap
fill the spaces with distractions
cuz you know im bouta snap
like the led on my pencil when i try and write
i smoke a blunt, then im sleepin for the whole night
i didnt answer cuz im busy talkin to the knife
throwin shade like we forgot about the sun light
sometimes its hard to fight back
wake up around noon
stuck in bed while i smoke the sack
black fingernails creeping down to your body
always fucking up like its way more than a hobby
fiendin for some love, so ill take what i can get
nothings ev-er enough, death would be the safest bet
got ashes on my clothes cuz everything about me’s gross
you said i always did the least but bitch i always do the most

people fade away like ghosts, i guess its for the better
loving at what cost? feel closer with the reaper
when i see her its like all time stops
cuz im asleep while the fucking rain drops

smoking packs while im alone
i write these songs and hate myself
this alcohol straight to my dome
and i dont pace myself
fuck a chaser
all i chase are these illusions 
happiness, a fallacy
ive come to the conclusion

these days waking up is getting hard now
i knock the jack back
i pick up what i put down
bad habits comin round like theyre ancient
its no surprise that im gunna need a rain check
i fill my brain with whatever i can find
im self defeating
always wasting all my time
got a 9 to my head, but i swear im fine
im unattached from the little that i call mine

while the rain drops (prod. blacklunged)

prod: @nversad

ty @micmole for being adorable

lyrics:
i spent every day
loving you in a peculiar way
come thru, lemme see your face
i wanna hold you body when its next to me
you never cared about me
go ahead and forget about me

i spent every day in love
i spend every night with drugs
poppin pills and gettin dubbed
bitches know im not the one
im annoying all my friends
with the thoughts up in my head
all that talk about the dead
all that cant get out my bed
but thats the shit that ive been living
and its all i think about
so i start to let it out
on those that i care about

i love it when you walk away (prod. nversad x yesterday)

@guardinmusic
@imnegativezer0

lyrics:
ive been saving this for the weekend
an eighth of spliffs to numb my emotions
my hair is split, im cutting the lose ends
my brain is shit, im tired of trying
im sick of this patience 
logic comes to dying
i knew you were lying but i didnt care
you were something to stop my self hatred
i didnt dare ask a question
you're always on my mind
intervention for loving too many times
did i mention this pain is a way of life?
you learn to live with it
or you let it eat you alive

id kill myself
just to be myself
dont even ask the question
all ill be is a burden

who the fuck am i
just another psychopathic little prick you decide
it's much better here without me cause you're feeling alive
all i ever did was love you but everything dies 

there's a monster in my head that's rippin' me apart 
vacant spaces in the places where we both would start
to separate and every day i blow my candles out
i sit inside but that's not something you  could care about
my heartbeat has grown tired of the wind
if you don't love me anymore than please don't bother to attend 
i'm a waste of energy i'll never see the point in this
arms length, this love is tragic, i'm not something you would miss

i'm so fucking lost without you
they don't really care about you

before the storm (ft. guardin) [prod. negative zero]

prod: @capngrim

lyrics:
baby your love for me
was the only thing
keepin me away
from home
cuz all i know is pain
its the only thing 
i know

do you wanna die with me?
ive been high all day
its the only escape that works
i hope i die today
my life lines frayed
it shows

now youre comin back to me
but i wont pick up the phone
think you forgot bout me
its not that easy
dont hit me up, im gone

ive been drunk every night this week
dodge these feelings and go to sleep
but its hard to lay here all alone
dont wanna talk, just want some dome

all i know is pain (prod. cap'n grim)

prod: @blacklunged

lyrics:
i love it when she lies to me
i love it when she wants to die with me
i cant recall a single good thing
unless we were high or were fucking
please dont come back
my life so trash
i dont need you
to come and fuck me up again
please dont come back
my life so trash
im too far gone
but im tryna get it back
hold up

ive been tryin
and rhyming
the hymens
that keep me going
ive been waitin
and patient
bury me
down with the ancients
cuz i know that youll remember
that yesterday is what made us

girl, get the fuck up out my world
and babe, get the fuck up out my brain
yeah youll, see me blown up or dead
before i say im sorry 
and let you crawl in my bed
you can take what you want
if you leave me hollow
an empty bullet casing
thats the best role model

too far gone (prod. blacklunged)

music video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VyMz-LiCySE&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=yesterday

prod: @whatevenisreal

my shawty think i drink too much
my homies know i think too much
i crack a 40
roll a dutch
pop ambien to sleep
i pour some out for all my team
i wear my heart out on my sleeves
a burden boy until i die
i hope it ends tonight

ohhhhh
you do not know what the fuck that ive been thru
ohhhhh
writin these songs just to vent bout my issues
ohhhhh
you can tell by all the lyrics that i fuckin miss you
fuck all these feelings
id rather not deal
pull up in the whip
put my head to the steel

ohhhhh
im sorry if you found out
ohhhh
i wonder how youre doing
put the past right out my brain
i never will address a thing
slowly decay by 21
my soul will lead me to my grave
my hair is blonde
my heart is black
these bitches never hit me back
my headphones on
as i walk alone
thru places
used to call my home
i just wanna drink my life away
with hopes that i wont wake today
i hate how people give a shit
just let me rest in peace

burden boy (prod. br//oken)

ft. @scummusic
prod. @sorrow_bringer

all my money go to smokin
all these hoes is just provokin
i just wanna live my life
without feelin like im broken
always tryna do whats right
even if its wrong for me
im not tryna pick a fight
i just wanna smoke my weed

rest in peace
from the east
in my dreams
where the passion leaves
i pull up wit a heavy heart
you knew this from the start
let it out in my art
imma cry in the dark
baby girl you think im worth it
but i know im fuckin worthless

you think im worth it
i know im fuckin worthless, aye
yeah baby, work it
you always knew i loved to play
the problems surface
unless you really wanna stay
but whats the purpose
if youre leaving anyway?

yeah, and i'm feeling lost and broken 
and i'm hoping that you'll hold me when i'm lying the cold floor 
and i know you need me now but just leave me on the ground 
i don't wanna talk about the things i did
i know i fucked up
i  know i did 
but i don't wanna be who i was back then
i'm trying to be a better me 
i'm trying

broken (ft. scum) [prod. sorrow bringer]

MUSIC VIDEO: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qGYyo9hQP70

@blacklunged

one of these days
i hope to be okay
im fixing the things
that felt right out of place
im an addict at best
you can take anything
as long as you stay
babe youll be my everything

i dont wanna bother you
stop hittin me up, were through
im takin it day by day
i dont even know what to say
im just tryna better myself
these bottles right up on the shelf
spent nights with the thoughts in my head
spent days wishin all this would end

no i dont need a friend
just need you to save my life
tried endin it twice
a blunts in my right
im thinkin wouldnt it be nice
to fade to the pavement?
these words on my grave are meant
to drive one last statement
right into the back of your neck

no i wont say sorry
i just want you by me
drive my car to your house
just to die in your arms
by myself

i'd die for you (prod. blacklunged)

@blacklunged

i wanna hear my name
while we fuck until the day ends
im runnin out of time
suicide up on my mind
wakin up, im still comin down
nobody ever stick around
look into my eyes
tell me i dont wanna die, aye

she talkin down on my name
when wed fuck until the day ends
im runnin out of time
suicide up on my mind
waking up, im still comin down
nobody ever stick around
look into my eyes
tell me i dont wanna die, aye

shawty watchu mean?
talkin like a fuckin fiend
like i wanna stick around
after i come lay it down

doors locked and the blinds closed
im losin all my mind hoe
2018, where the fuck did all the time go?

i aint gon lie tho
i been feelin fine bro
still singin all the high notes
this paxil got me right tho
i got a problem with the benzos
got a problem with the white
i got a problem with these bitches
got a problem with this life

the interlude of our misery (prod. blacklunged)

MUSIC VIDEO: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LmOas5SMreM

@blacklunged

fuck im sick of all this life shit
couple memories in the bags
bitch im wasted
faded off these drugs that i once did 
i cant even function
livin without loves fuckin pointless

fuck i feel so empty 
can you feel my pain?
can you fill the void just for one night?
the line im walking on's tight
wrap it round my neck
let it subside
painting pictures in my notebook
im broken hearted

why cant i just say shit
less i grab the paper?
i cant even save her
name in my contacts
digits in my phone, i dont want that

sitting all alone in my room, try to forget
push it all away as i lay back
got a blunt, i light that
bitches wanna fuck, i dont need that
hit my line im too depressed to write back
god, give me all my light back

i cannot remember the last time i felt emotions
all i knows my brains in constant motion
staring into space, tryna focus
dont even know who wrote this
(i dont even know myself)

never knew (prod. blacklunged)

@whatevenisreal

lookin at the ground and i see your face
nobodies around when i need em the most
everybody treats me like a ghost
so imma disappear when they need me the most

catch me flyin out to LA
runnin round these fuckin circles
got a smile thats deceiving
you can hear it in my vocals
i been cryin in my bedroom
i been dyin just to see u 
can i get over this hurdle?
or will i fall and crack my skull?

lookin at the ground and i see your face
nobodies around when i need em the most
everybody treats me like a ghost
so imma disappear when they need me the most

ill be good enough for ya one day
but for now ill sit here waitin
hoping this will work its way out
but i doubt it, im decaying
wish my life had some more meanin
wish these pills would fuckin work
wish my head wasnt so fucked up
wish these feelings didnt hurt

keep it a buck, im lonely af (prod. br//oken)

music video:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IC7Ak_JNOWA
hosted by sad chill </3

@prodreaper

i cant feel a fucking thing
keep my eyes up to the rain
death is callin out my name
it's not too late to call again
the sky starts fallin on my face
but i'll always pull up to the same old place
marijuana rolled up, hit a gram to the face
said it's never been so good to fucking feel so dead

it could never be the same
put the double barreled to my brain
next to my 40 oz and pack of cigs
i'll paint a picture with the parts that remain

what would you do
if we could go back and maybe change some things?
if only you knew
that i'd do it all again just to get to where i'm at
sometimes ur eyes turn blue
and sunshines look fine without
or anybody that i knew
yeah, weeks go by where i don't think about you

sometimes ur eyes turn blue (prod. reaper) </3 music video in description </3

ctrl+alt+del w/ voka (prod. undying)

@splashgvng
@barrenwaste

premiered/hosted by sad chill
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hBF9w0jchUM

dont you hate the part
when we start to fall into pieces?
and its a work of art
the way you walk into my room
and how u keep me awake
even when ur not around
she always puts me to shame
its such a lame relation
ill take all the blame as long as it helps you sleep at night
i hope to haunt your life

maybe someday we’ll get past it all
but for right now you can watch me ball
got your front seat on the sidelines
and i dont give a fuck if u start to cry

yeah u sow what u reap baby
ive slept in all damn week baby
im still waitin for u to come back to me

lost it all again
but ill get back up every time til i win
lost it all again
if u loved me once, u can do it again

i loved you once but thats the last time itll ever be
ill be fuckin damned if u ever again make a fool of me
wastin all my money on the drugs that keep me lonely
anxiety ridden phony
let the 9 cock back and blow me
out of this planet
and ill b damned if
any of u fuckers take the one thing that i need; its singin a song
for all u singin along
tried to love u once but now u know im done

like melo, baby (ft. barren) [prod. splashgvng]

@mewsyc
@producedbyaidan
@guccihighwaters

yeah im just ur boy toy
fillin up some free time
take me when u wanna
then leave me here to die
i'll keep it to myself now
got me feelin left out
u talk a lot shit like u dont got a lot to hide

numb to the core
yeah, i kill that pain
with a bottle of liqoure
feel it runnin thru my veins
when im not high
or preoccupied
i got thorns in my heart
and a storm roarin in my mind

whats inside my cup
blindsides my brain
so i hide my face
in an act of shame
and hope to dissapear
in a perminant way
u watch me fade to black
u'd love to watch my pain

and u know
who to call
ill b there
after all
and i know
when i fall
u wont care
afterall,

yeah im just ur boy toy
fillin up some free time
take me when u wanna
then leave me here to die
i'll keep it to myself now
got me feelin left out
u talk a lot shit like u dont got a lot to hide

numb to the core
yeah, i kill that pain
with a bottle of liqoure
feel it runnin thru my veins
when im not high
or preoccupied
i got thorns in my heart
and a storm roarin in my mind

yeah, im just a waste
i dont got that much to offer
im selfish and conceeded 
but always put my all
into everyone and everything
then watch it as it falls
let it crumble to my feet
just like everything ive ever loved

yeah, im just ur boy toy
fillin up some free time
take me when u wanna
then leave me here to die
i always knew the truth
u aint even gotta lie
ur the best thing
but im just another guy

im ur puppet and u play me like a game
text from my ex, yeah she never felt the same
use me on a rainy day
abuse me til i cant even think
that picuture that we took
i always kept it safe
id put it in my pocket just so i could see ur face
when i was out of town
u always kept me with u
never told u bout all the times when i would miss u

yeah, im just ur boy toy
fillin up some free time
take me when u wanna
then leave me here to die
i always knew the truth
u aint even gotta lie
ur the best thing
but im just another guy

boy toy (ft. guccihighwaters) [prod. mewsyc & aidan]

@splashgvng
@curtainss

im a disaster 
im goin thru it
move faster
push thru it

but im plastered to my bed
cant escape that silent dread
im awake but i feel dead
guess im lost inside my head

serotonin’s synonymous
with the worst parts in all of us

i dont care if every letter in this makes me wrong
i wear my pain like a sweater
i been better
wont be for too long

and if it looks like forever 
dont forget that
nothings everlong

baby u got me tethered
im anxious, whatever
pop it into a song

take me for the moment
let me stay tonight
fuck me or whatever
love me, it feels so right

you cant shake me
been ballin lately
my old friends hate me
im goin crazy

look into my eyes
tell me if its real
cpt sad on the mic
thas a real big deal

time will tell
if all these lies went well
keep it inside my cells
left underneath my nails

imma mess and thats never gunna change
without the pills, needin somethin to arrange
the world is fallin around
i think that death is callin
i see ur smile
and drown
but im just gettin started

SEROTONIN'S SYNONYMOUS (prod. splashgvng x curtains)

fit for this life (w/ Lil Xtra) [prod. sorrow bringer]

produced, mixed/master by me
live drums by jordan davis
https://twitter.com/jordancd3_
https://www.instagram.com/jordandavis_98/?hl=en
cover art by ciel
https://cielxxx.com/


its a cold world we live in
had to learn about self forgiveness
im sold out on believin
so ill make what i can with these broken pieces

ive got all the time in the world
to figure it out
the root of my sorrow
the pain and the doubt

you cant live with that
i cant live without
u throwin it back 
while im turnin u out

i got a one track mind
and a wish to die
no tears to cry
when im left behind

dont know about tomorrow but i know bout today
you got me real fucked up but you know what ill say

leaves fall and im fallin apart
had to pick back up
think i gotta restart

yeah
this life is a race and we’re runnin in circles
im takin the leap over hurdles
that ive laid out myself all eternal

i send peace to my life and my loved ones
never got it off a trust fund
been about it since my day 1
imma leave my body when the night comes

leaves fall
and ive fallen apart
have to pick back up
think i gotta restart

if life has no meaning
why the fuck do i care?
yeah these people
these places
thats a reason to live

and these demons im facin
have a place in my life

but the road thats ahead
never comes to end
think that i lost it again

leaves fall and im fallin apart
had to pick back up
think i gotta restart

death calls
but im not by the phone
if you had one chance
would u take it and go?

SPOTIFY

restart

prod/recorded/engineered by me

s/o @daine-lauren for guitar inspo <3

how many days have passed?

so many days that passed
couldnt do a fuckin thing
sit in bed, roll a blunt, think of who i need to be

gotta smoke at least a gram a day to keep my mind straight
guilty pleasures, true love
fightin for my heartache

but ur the only one that has my heart
i never meant to break what we had built

i wish i knew the things i have to say
to even up the score and get u to stay with me for another night

but im the only one there is to blame
u dont need to change a fucking thing
baby girl i know it aint the same
but ur in my heart forever

cant even help
but feel like ill fuck it up today
and u dont see
that my minds all over the place

it aint enough
yeah ur hearts for the latter
fucked up
nothing else even matters

lost in my head
lost ur love
im movin on with that

just addin weight 
to my shoulders
straighten out my back

it aint enough
and ur hearts been shattered
fucked up
nothing else even matters

how many times i told you
that the doors right over there?
gave u signs that u ignored
now u pullin out ur hair

yeah its my fault
my fault
dont put no blame upon urself
too far gone
a lost cause
ill keep them pictures on my shelf

cuz ur the only one that has my heart
i never meant to break what we had built
i wish i knew the things id have to say
to even up the score and get you to stay with me for another night

im the only one there is to blame
u dont need to change a fucking thing
ur perfect in every way
i hope that u realize that someday

youre too good for me
and now ur leaving
keep runnin away
til u stop bleedin
ill be here for you
whenever u need it
you can come back to me
if u ever needed

cant even help
but feel like ill fuck it up today
and u dont see
that my minds all over the place

it aint enough
yeah ur hearts for the latter
fucked up
nothing else even matters

leaving

featuring
production and vocals from @vibevoka
guitar, bass and vocals from @cpt_sad
vocals from @barrenwaste
live drums from Jordan Davis [https://twitter.com/jordancd3_]

voka

yeah im fading
into the ocean
just waiting for my death bed
complicating
any emotion
just feel like no one knows me :( 

barren

birds eye view 
of a man staring back
picture frame take ya
20 years past 
known intuition 
1 year in your lap
raised me 
to take none
and give what you get 
chanting there’s not 
enough time left 
can’t snap back 
to the right mindset 
going to sleep
at 6 in the morning
light coming 
rain is still pouring
eyes open
to the sunset 
soul trying to 
out run me

go away 
as far as can be 
gunning the streets 
shout from the tops of trees 
it’s all gonna end 
so be where u need

yesterday

i know that nothing will last
give me some time, i been coped with the past
i cannot take it all back
love aint a feeling
its bout how you act
couldnt've put in the work that you needed
i cannot sleep without bleedin
keep me at bay or the storm wont subside
its rainin, its pourin
lets go for a drive
75 down memory lane
im gettin high to numb all the pain
forget your smile, forget my name
its been a while and shit aint the same
been too busy disassociating
daylights fading
in the shadows fate is waitin for us

having to relearn the things
that i used to know so well
tell me what you wanna hear
if i speak my heart too loud
in the depths of the ocean
i lye resting peacefully

dont you stop and ever think about how things used to be? 
[i do all the time]

no one knows me (w/ voka & barren) [prod. voka x yesterday]

MUSIC VIDEO: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pMS--FQ5yxM

w/ @barrenwaste

yeah girl, i get it
im all too concerned
with the lesson that i never really learned
you aint somethin that i ever saw as a cure
so get lost
or get with it
this loves been finished
my hearts on fire
cuz i dont know how to quit it
 
and if i ever had a second to take back
id save it for someone
who aint lookin for payback 
i thought u loved me
but it isnt the same
so ill stay fucked up
tryna numb all my pain
 
just take me back
found my own little slice of home
itll never be the same
but i feel grown
aint nobody lovin u like i did
hearts offline
and my heads been split
hands on the wheel
runnin off of the road
you can have my life
if i got ur soul
same old shit
with a brand new bitch
fuck this life
im over it
 
if by now you didn’t know
i prefer to spend my days alone
held captive only by these four walls
haven’t answered a single call
all night
been dealing with a hell
of an internal gripe
triplet flows
keeping this brain alive
with how much im smoking
the future aint looking too bright
can barely remember
to write down a line
people keep asking
no i aint fine
dreading a pointless
unfulfilling life
somebody come and
take this mic
i could rant and rave
with all my might
dont wanna be too specific
na this shit aint even written
i can shit out a rhyme
that you call your best work
ya lady still love me
man i can be such a jerk
i take out my anger on
all in my path
ruining friendships
i never had
losing a loved one
that ill never grasp
dealing with the pain
that comes with it all
just me n the homies
fuck it we ball

https://linktr.ee/yesterday.nj

girls don't like me (prod. yesterday)

music video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=avMTtfJt4NE&ab_channel=%EF%BC%AD%EF%BD%85%EF%BD%86%EF%BD%95%EF%BD%8D%EF%BD%85%EF%BD%94%EF%BD%94%EF%BD%8F

@barrenwaste
@prodreaper

pull up to the spotlight in the same jeep ive been drivin around since 2015
girl you know id love to stay but ive got some things ive gotta do
big dreams, big dollars that im flockin to
if u dont love me, u can go
i dont give a fuck shawty 
ive been out here on my own
yeah you dont love me and it shows
and now you hate my face
wont show me grace

who couldve ever guessed
that puttin my heart on my sleeve
would have me feelin blessed
from all of the webs that we weaved
yeah all the ties cut didnt mean nothin
yeah all those nights fucked up meant something

did u ever believe?
could u ever foresee?
i dont know man
im just tryna ball out with my bros man
smokin blunts with chris and alec
then we hit the show man
bitches come and go but this shits gettin sortta old man :/
fuck i feel like im an old man
movin at a slower pace
but i will never fold man

too far gone, i aint comin back
when you hear this song i hope it brings u back
to the nights that made us who we are
smokin weed in ur backyard
trippin over every word
but nothing ever held weight
when theres no one left to hold you and no where else to run
will i find u down the barrel of my fully loaded gun?

i put 16 bars of my heart down
just to pick it back up
and throw that shit out
i cock it back
yeah im ready to go
bitch i cant stop firing off
keep ya head low

pull up to the spotlight in the same jeep ive been drivin around since 2015
girl you know id love to stay but ive got some things ive gotta do
big dreams, big dollars that im flockin to
if u dont love me, u can go
i dont give a fuck shawty 
ive been out here on my own
yeah you dont love me and it shows
and now you hate my face
wont show me grace

my service is the worst its ever been
can’t even get one phone call in
shorty trynna hit my mf line again
but baby im more worried abt ur friend
thats how it is
blue fading with the pink up in the sky
if i could i would never wake up again
not even think twice
its a scary occurrence
how much i wish i would die
but with the times we in
no one will hear the cries
they think im doing it to
boost the status online
thats the furthest from 
what i want in life
aint got a dollar to my name
so many hours in the game
used to not care about the money
now i do 
cause if i dont make some soon
imma be hanging from my throat
chair kicked over in my room
chances i thought giving you 
been gathered up instead
rehearse the lies im telling yall
then tell em all again
its not ending well i guess
add disaster to this mess
no bottom to this pit
i go to plead the fifth
tomorrows spite greeting me
todays desires digging deep

SPOTLIGHT (ft. barren) [prod. reaper]

@sorrow_bringer

10 missed calls
didnt even here the phone ring
i rly thought
that i left that in the old me
why're ur eyes always red?
she still walks thru my head
good god, i've been feelin so unholy
when i fall, i know no one's there to hold me
if that's all to be said
you can load up the lead

spent my last 12 months
tryna make a couple bucks
ruinnin from my loved ones
i've been hiding
from the life i knew once
to the shit i do now
you can't even here the sound
if i'm cryin
long nights smoking blunts
til the sun comes up
i've been faded on my own
and idgaf
if the neighbors gunna watch
take a pic too
it's all good
they won't ever get what we do

10 missed calls (prod. sorrow bringer)

@hellahaunted

i dont wanna see the stars anymore
i dont wanna keep in touch
i dont wanna feel used
so i dont think we should talk anymore
i know if i leave first you wont have the chance to hurt me
i got it rehearsed
learnt to assume the worst
its the last time you'll see me
unless ur dreamin
its the last thing i want
but we cant even talk
i believe that you loved me
but loves not enough
im not some ground just to walk on to distract you from him
i said to treat me better
you said ur tryin ur best
so much for discourse
you left me with holes in my chest
im not the first choice and i aint cut out for this shit

im not the one here to blame
but you dont know what ur sayin
or what its doin to me
this halfway house doesnt feel like a home
u act so cold and i dont like the snow
im not the one whos insane
go 'head and block me girl
ur no good for me anyway
this halfway house doesnt feel like a home
ur hearts so cold and id rather be alone

so why do i still miss u
when i got reassurance from the people that mean the most to me?
its prolly the codependence
or that this pain is endless
and i dont wanna deal with everything on my own
but what's there left to do
when the only thing i know
is that i cant rely on you?
just let me fade away
yeah i know u werent ready
but we aint on ur terms anyway

halfway house (prod. caspr)

@curtainss @taxpurposes

you were on the phone
and i was in the back seat
gettin rly stoned
thinkin bout my last week
how i was alone
sleepin on my friends couch
tryna move along
when i know this isnt lasting
somethings wrong with me
i wont give it up, not easily
take my hand
just breathe
i wont give u up, so easily

gimme a way out or give me a sign
every word you rehearsed
remembered all of the lines
bullshittin me ab love every night
and im better off without you in hind sight
i wasted so much time
playin all these games
puttin up a fight
hopes a dangerous thing
when its all u got
just leave me be

just leave me be
im better off without u
hangin out to dry
while someones in ur bedroom
covered in the sheets
that hid me just last week
funny how it works
youre so quick to forget me

you were on the phone
and i was in the back seat
gettin rly stoned
thinkin bout my last week
how i was alone
sleepin on my friends couch
tryna move along
when i know this isnt lasting
somethings wrong with me
i wont give it up, not easily
take my hand
just breathe
i wont give u up, so easily

i know how it goes
one day im ur everything
and the next im just some dead weight
we just started and u fold
ik ur still in love with ur ex and o’s
and i deserve so much more
so u can see urself out thru that door
then ill drink so much that ill hit the floor
and do it all again
dont know what for

you were on the phone
and i was in the back seat
gettin rly stoned
thinkin bout my last week
how i was alone
sleepin on my friends couch
tryna move along
when i know this isnt lasting
somethings wrong with me
i wont give it up, not easily
take my hand
just breathe
i wont give u up, so easily

somethings wrong with me
i wont give it up, not easily
take my hand
just breathe
i wont give u up, so easily

BREATHE (prod. curtains x taxpurposes)

@fuckrubbish

cover art by spookygang
https://spooky.land/

i cant even focus
i been feelin off
this sadness my religion
and i cant ever drop it
makin bad decisions
with the baddest bitches
look at how the stars shine
i wont ever be that bright

kill em all with kindness
right on the asphalt
ill leave my life behind
can u even spare a thought?
gimme a reason
i shouldnt say goodbye
look at how her eyes shine
i could die happy tonight
yeah ive said it before
it wouldnt be the same
i filled ur mind with lies
you cant forgive me again
this time its all on me
just sit down and listen please
were runnin in circles
this cycles starting to show
cant help but think of u always
when i get too overwhelmed
baby were no good for eachother even if we want it
nobody ever came too close to you
im just bein honest for once

dont take this out on me
just let go and let me breathe
nobody's ever got me like u do
and i just wanna forget the girl that i knew

yeah she ran away from me
and now she gon make a scene
she pulled out my heart
set it aflame
and let the whole damn world see
i jus wanna know if ur good
yeah baby im doin alright
never felt less understood
but i still wanna see u at night
i wish that u would
i wish that we could
work this all out
be together forever
but it can never be the same
blow my whole check on a ticket to see u again
im done waitin for u in the rain
takes 2 long to make up ur brain
all u know ab is pain
and all i wanna see is ur face
but these walls close in
put pressure to my skull
keep ur gun loaded
and keep my mind in holdin
i feel more lonely with u
than i do alone
paint the walls with my blood
like a withering rose

yesterday

Pinned to spotlight

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