im so fking obsessed this gives me chills

at one point we are all met with the annihilation of option

Death tends to be a bit of a taboo topic when making music, as going about it appropriately can be rather tricky. On the flip side, I feel that music has contributed to a desensitization to the idea of death, and whether that's good or bad is still unknown to me. Sure, it's the one constant that everyone experiences in life, but it being normal and expected doesn't necessarily mean it can't be scary to think about. Death is the end, and at that point (unless whatever theology or religion you subscribe to turns out to be the right one) one can no longer decide the course of their life, all decision making and self-reflection is halted, what you have at that moment is your legacy.

Yeah, I think referring to death as the "annihilation of option" is kinda in your face about the whole concept, but I think it truly is. There are no more options on how you life your life, and as grim as it may sound, you no longer have any say in how it ends. Taking one's own life, as horrible as a tragedy as it is, still applies to the whole 'decision making' process. It's a choice someone makes that results in squandering all potential choices. Scary shit honestly.

And there's the whole idea of not necessarily wanting to die, but rather just not exist for lets say, a year or so? That's a whole other topic though, so we can get to that in another song. I think my main point in all of this (and the reasoning for the song is really up to interpretation to the listener) is, *spoilers ahead* it's really just an expression of my thoughts about the whole concept. Death is scary, it's very real, and what happens after will never be certain.

But yeah, I meant that last part of the song, the idea of dying does make me pretty fucking nauseous.

Annihilation Of Option [prod. hieloways]

It’s empty inside my heart 
I’ve got Nothing to give I feel so torn apart 
300 miles away from you, it’s too far 
Wish up on a star 
to heal up all of my scars 
I had to go 
I feel so emotionally unavailable 
you’d never know 
cause I’ll always stay so unstable 
I feel so emotionally unavailable 

so lonely it’s inescapable 
I know that you’re so irreplaceable 
your love was gravitational 
my damage unforgettable 
every time I lied 
you became more observational 

Now I sit in silence 
fuck all of the violence 
sick of all this fighting 
broke my heart I’m crying 
I just need some guidance 
Cant you see I’m trying 
to change my ways, your highness 
I present you with this diamond 

Remember 
every winter comes with this weather 
The same breeze that we felt in December 
reminds me of all the times 
I drove for miles just to see your face 
I wish that I could do this right but it’s too late 
left alone with scars on my heart 
you didn’t want to move far 
and now I’m broken so I try to live through my art

emotionally unavailable (prod. Afterlife x Xxajii)

Lyrics:

E
T
A

twenty minutes to your house
i lost track of the time again can this absence not fuckin count
i think i'm fucking delirious thinking my wings will sprout
it's stupid hilarious how they think i've never felt
i'll turn the twenty minute drive into ten
you think i care about my livelihood that's just my mind when heaviest
and
for fucking sure reality didn't make a dent
i'm sure my body will end up inside a ditch 
maybe somewhere something'll click

so i sit here writing
all my peeves and troubles
i don't want to leave this dirt pile 
in the middle of nowhere
at the moment really don't care
in a minute i still won't care
no i don't care still won't care

dirt nap (canyouseetheghost)

lyrics:
these nights i just sit on my rooftop
reminisce bout the times that have passed 
moments where i was happy now i’m not 
cut me free oh cut me free 

if i could take what is left 
watch these cards turn into nothing 
a knife in my back 
guess it’s nice to have company 
i can’t forget these promises made 
no more painting in violet 

if i left would you forget my face 
would another person just take my place 
do i wanna stay or occupy your space 
are there better days will i just be erased 

cut me free oh cut me free 

some day i’ll just get off this rooftop 
but for now it’s the right place to be 
oh cut me free

rooftops [prod. pekarot]

cover art by @faetihx
ily <3
prod @emptychest
shout out @imkt

Lyrics:

Heart beat going fast
And im sad now
Everynight everyweek i just black out
She always text never never go out
got a text from my plug holdup gotta go now
Same drugs 
Same weed
I dont really give a fuck
Ghost me
No hugs no kisses
I left that boy in stitches
If he want to fight again
He gonna turn into a digit
Then im gunna kiss his mistress
Gotta stay on track ghost recon 
With the mission
Kt packed the new bowl 
Losing count of the spinich
Im counting up the fucking minutes 
Till i fucking break
Can you stay
I dont want to lose ur face

Heart beat going fast
And im sad now
Everynight everyweek i just black out
She always text never never go out
got a text from my plug holdup gotta go now
Im tired of this shit
And im tired of the pain
All these words in brain
I just posted a new tweet
Why she all up on my page
Why she gotta call 
When she not even my main
im too fucked up

Spotify

ghost me (prod. emptychest)

empty_l1fe w/ fridvy (kubsy)

alr (prod. synergy)

Hope you guys enjoy this one, this is unlike anything I've posted before and I think it's pretty cool. Produced by myself. Out on streaming platforms sometime later on if it does well idk enjoy <3

Follow My Twitter: twitter.com/DreamsYokai

Lyrics:
Stormy nights and winters cold
Frozen paths I follow home
A town lay north encased in snow
And I have learned to let go
Pull me down and I will float
The kingdom falls on icy slopes
And I've befriended every stone
You would think that I froze

winterhold

Produced by @user-757072975 & @pekarot_161
Engineering, additional vocals by @horoshavibes

LYRICS
Caffeine and THC
No better way to start the day
All the things that keep me sane
Are the same things dragging me to an early grave

Look at the rut that I've
Dug myself into this time around
It comes as a surprise but somehow
I'm still above the ground

I don't wanna die young
I just wanna be someone you can rely on
But I'm
Living in a pipe dream if I think
Anybody else could like me
Despite me

I don't wanna be an addict
I don't wanna die before my time
Like my dad did
That'd be tragic
Everything I have just tossed in the trash bin

(Horosha)
My whole life I've been an addict
Chasing a high that just doesn't exist
For a life I wanna live
And neglecting the one I'm in

So it's
Caffeine and THC
Late nights on my balcony to cope
With the reality that not everything works out like on the silver screen

I don't wanna be an addict
Chasing a high that just doesn't exist
There's a life that I could live
If I just let myself live it

Listen on Spotify!

Tragic! (Prod. Lavender_Txwn & Pekarot)

slow reply

𝙨𝙚𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚 𝙙𝙤𝙬𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙧𝙤𝙖𝙙

Lyrics:

hey
hi
hello
thought i'd call you on my phone
yeah i'm on my way home
i'll see you sometime down the road
hey
hi
hello
thought i'd call you on my phone
yeah i'm on my way home
i'll see you sometime down the road
(ok like)
yeah k i'm ghosting but fuck you did it first
i'm tryna avoid you before i end up in a hearse
i know you'd never get it cause you're happy with his curse
don't think imma get it like when i gonna learn

my eating habits bad
watch me fuck my life
you got me had
in a couple nights
the people here think black and white
these heights we diving through this shite

and through this shit
you grab my hand
we power through without ritalin
i hope you're well chillin with your mans
cuddled up on the couch i'm not jealous and
like have fun
i don't really care no more, don't want you feel some
for me fucking dip from my life for my own good
blocking up emotions. i don't really wanna feel one
dropping all my friends and family and i don't need none

hey
hi
hello
thought i'd call you on my phone
yeah i'm on my way home
i'll see you sometime down the road
hey
hi
hello
thought i'd call you on my phone
yeah i'm on my way home
i'll see you sometime down the road

bye
ciao
so long
i won't see you on my lows
i don't need you to row my boat
just need my music and my flows
bye
ciao
so long
i won't see you on my lows
i don't need you to row my boat
just need my music and my flows

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xg5_cAa6f-U
PRODUCED BY YUNG FAIRY

been working on this a while I hope I did the beat justice

heyhihello (yung fairy)

i'm stuck in the past but you don't have to be

@ninenineteencollective

dm or email me for fts, mixes, whatever :)

Email: yokaidreams30@gmail.com

winterhold

Yokai Dreams

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