losing you was proof that maybe I’m not numb to everything

please don’t step on my heart 
i’ve been over and over this
many times before 
please don’t get out my car 
the door opens and you leave 
and then we fall apart 

call my bluff, we play cards 
but she always has the ace 
hiding up her sleeve 
i can’t ever recall
not one moment that she ever 
simply smiled at me 

and those cold eyes make me panic
what do you want 
i can’t manage 
and those bright red lips 
make me vanish
what do you want with me 

stop the crying and the shouting, im sorry 
but maybe you’re better off
i’ll stop the crying if u tell me u want me
i’ll do anything no matter the cost

cus the rain my love hasn’t stopped coming
ever since you were the one i lost
i can’t be here without you, im dying
one kiss will finish me off 

please don’t step on my heart (stop the crying and the shouting i’m sorry)
i’ve been over and over this
many times before (but maybe you’re better off)
please don’t get out my car (i’ll stop the crying if u tell me u want me) 
the door opens and you leave 
and then we fall apart (i’ll do anything no matter the cost)

call my bluff, we play cards (cus the rain my love hasn’t stopped coming) 
but she always has the ace 
hiding up her sleeve (ever since you were the one i lost) 
i can’t ever recall (i can’t be here without you, im dying)
not one moment that she ever 
simply smiled at me (one kiss will finish me off)

banshee (wisssery)

sleepinthrutheparty w/ 93feetofsmoke

the boy who cried wolf (p. noah thomas)

superstar (noahmadethiss+jolst)

[sendflowrs]
and as the cold came, it didn’t feel right
on my deathbed i pray for your warm soft kiss
these angels they lay next to me and calm it 
i don’t think i really loved you baby if i’m honest 

and in my resting place, keep the seal tight
cus i would raise all the dead for you if you wanted
i would purge these dark woods with a bow and harness 
just cut out my heart whenever u want it 

[nevermadeithome]

You’re not where i need you
When i sleep at night
My lungs are so hard to breathe through 
My throats so tight 
You’re pretty like the pleiades
I mesmerised just by your eyes
I can’t seem to look at you 
Your hue and glow just seem so bright

Sleeping at night in your gown wear 
Swim the sea
Kill the king just to be there 
Bring your coat because its cold where  we‘re leaving 
Hold my hand baby this is the deep end


[sendflowrs]
on my grave 
in native tongue under my name 
is a phrase that says
“the one i love will always get away”
guess it never changes
no matter how much i sit and pray
for a better day
i’ll always be the one that rots away 
call me anyway
call me when you’re home or MIA
call me when you’re sad
when you’re feelin down or feel ok
call me everyday
call me fuckin now before i tear my face 
maybe you would love me more if i would finally get in shape 

[blaidd]
Stack my chips up high like I'm all in
Fall in love with your face in the morning
All this hate in the way had me bawling
But now I got you 
Your love was the only thing to prove
This world is nothing without you 
Now i find myself with nothing left to do 
But I came back from a business trip 
I Wanna go home cause I miss my *beep*
If I stay longer I just might flip
I wanna go home to the softest lips

starlight (feat. nevermadeithome + blaidd) (prod. flesh + jolst)

prod fats'e 

lyrics: 

hit me with the combo then
grieving while it's burning and
madness piles up again
bracing for a triple up
hiding for another month
running from the mourning dove
your paintings hanging on my wall
remembering when i was young
wish i could've said farewell
bracing for a triple up
hiding for another month
running from the mourning dove

i've been searching for the remedy
stuck inside my memories 
stuck inside for weeks 
i'm in my room just pacing endlessly
thought that i'd get wiser but i still feel like i'm 23
my eyes have gotten drier 
now i think i'm numb to everything
colors bleed right off the tapestry
embrace another tragedy 
circling above there's hidden messages i'm yet to see
embrace the raven calling me and pull me close 'till i can't breathe
losing you is proof that maybe i'm not numb to everything

mourning dove

body going missing

prod: https://soundcloud.com/block-tane https://soundcloud.com/nate2timezz
 
i can hear my own heartbeat
pound in this quiet
hands bound back
with this rope
he'll tie me up
(i can hear my own heartbeat pounding
i can hear my own heartbeat pounding)
i can feel the cold concrete
laying down, crying
itching through scabs
to be whole is all i want
(i can hear my own heartbeat pounding
i can hear my own heartbeat pounding)
open me up
god willing i'll make it
your shirt soaking with blood
oh, my body keep shaking
place my flesh upon a sigil
brand with my initials
this night will make me whole again
the embers start to whistle
nothing left, no one to hold me
bloody ceremony
i will lose control again,
the heavens will disown me

please, please
it's all that i have
(like magician, body going)

like magician,
body going missing
bloodied up my palms
baby i feel like a christian
just how i envisioned
prep for the incision
pierce right through my heart
until my fingers finish twitching
oh yeah,
i think i like it, i don't wanna pretend
i'm fucking begging for it
cut me again
and again, and again, and again
and again

(let us pray, let us wish
to partake in communion,
let us partake in communion,
and feast upon the old blood)

where i'm going
i won't make it back
hope he's waiting for me
vision going black
nothing i have left will make it past
open me up
god willing i'll make it
your shirt soaking with blood
oh my body keeps shaking
keeps shaking


paleblood

prod @93feetofsmoke mix master pat dicenso

different schedules, different weights

heaven2

Thought I was

lyrics -

[sushihater]
i lit a match to my memory box
watched the polaroid's curl like my thoughts
they told me time gonna stitch it shut
but the wounds learned how to rot
i tossed the ashes into cold night air
but the smoke still clung like my despair
tried to run from shadows in my head
but they follow close wont let me forget
i’m digging graves for all my yesterdays
but the dirt just crumbles and it slips away
every scar’s a story that won’t let go
i’m haunted by the things i still don’t show
-
[emmy lee]
its locked away
all of my pain
wont let it show
dont knopw how to let it go
i keep it all in the back of my head
the dust and ashes that come from the dead
inside my memory box
dont ask me i dont know where the lock is
(inside my memory box)
(dont ask me i dont know where the lock is)
-
[sushihater]
i lit a match to my memory box
watched the polaroid's curl like my thoughts
they told me time gonna stitch it shut
but the wounds learned how to rot
i tossed the ashes into cold night air
but the smoke still clung like my despair

mourning dove

fats'e

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