*Amnesia*

spiralling graphite
a demented waltz
        to the side and a round and around
until cut blooms
syncopate my heart waves
        and around and around my head
stiff petals and prickly yarn
        chained to the side
twisted, crushed
a cloud of glass shards
        gurgling over and around and around
until fresh ashes
precipitate, penetrate and
        crack to the side
an enamelled skull

Amnesia

Live recording of performance at Griswold Hall, Peabody Conservatory, October 2014. Composed in 2014.
Chen Zhangyi, Conductor
Rebecca Roy, Mezzo-Soprano
Ping-Hsin Wu, Flute
Yi-Hsien Chen, Clarinet
Gabriel Lee, Violin
Minzo Kim, Cello
Lin Hengyue, Piano


There's little joy in life for me,
      And little terror in the grave;
I 've lived the parting hour to see
      Of one I would have died to save.

Calmly to watch the failing breath,
      Wishing each sigh might be the last;
Longing to see the shade of death
      O'er those belovèd features cast.

The cloud, the stillness that must part
      The darling of my life from me;
And then to thank God from my heart,
      To thank Him well and fervently;

Although I knew that we had lost
      The hope and glory of our life;
And now, benighted, tempest-tossed,
      Must bear alone the weary strife.

On The Death Of Anne Brontë (with text by Charlotte Brontë)

Performance by Ekmeles and Sandbox Percussion, on May 1, 2023, at the Logan Center, University of Chicago.

---
"Fire and Spice" by Yuting Tan

Technically, we don’t taste spice. 
 
The taste receptor cells in our taste buds allow us to perceive five different flavours: sweet, salty, sour, bitter, and umami; but not spice.  
 
Tears flow naturally when we feel pain, but sometimes, we cry tears of joy, and sometimes, we welcome pain.
 
The tingling on our lips, our tongues, in our throats, as heat swells in our chests, our stomachs. 
 
Pain exists in two realms – the psychological and the physical.
 
I remember the fire burning into long nights of euphoric tears. 
 
I feel the flames growing within me, slowly radiating from the innermost parts of my torso, as blood pumps through my arteries and my heart beats unsteadily.
 
A prickling sensation as sweat pierces through my skin, like an overly ripe peach that threatens to tear apart. 
 
It is sweet, savoury, sour, and bitter, absolute pleasure all at once, and then nothing; numbness prevails in our taste buds, my heart.

Fire And Spice

Live Performance at 24-Hour Concert, 17 January 2015. Recorded in Peabody Conservatory, Cohen-Davison Theatre.

Catriona Barr, Euphonium
Alex Fournier, Double Bass

When Night Falls for Euphonium and Double Bass

Performed in Leith Symington Griswold Hall, Peabody Conservatory on 12 March 2015.

Trista Wong Yat Sze, Violin
Julia Kaeun Kim, Violin
Hannah Leigh-Doyle, Viola
Minzo Kim, Cello

Reflections for String Quartet

Previously known as "Fade".

Performed by Ensemble Soundinitiative in collaboration with the Yong Siew Toh Conservatory of Music New Music Ensemble. 

Recording of live performance at YSTCM Concert Hall, September 2015.


till the ink runs low

Live recording of performance at Yong Siew Toh Conservatory of Music Concert Hall. Composed in 2016.

Francis Tan, Conductor
Andrew Ng, Violin
Placida Ho, Violin
Mia Chen, Viola
Joe Wan, Cello
Charmaine Teo, Harp



Play

Recording of live performance at Peabody Conservatory on 8th March 2017. Composed in 2016.

Randall Chaves Camacho, Percussion
Yonatan Rozin, Percussion
Nonoka Mizukami, Percussion
Matthew Overbay, Percussion

Kotekan

Recording from Peabody Symphony Orchestra Composition Reading on November 3rd, 2017.

In Fields Of Wilted Flowers

Shayne Harris, Flute
Yu Jia, Pipa
Ngoh Kheng Seng, Percussion
Justin DeHart, Percussion

Recording of performance at Old St John's Church, Nelson, New Zealand, for the 36th Composers Association of New Zealand (CANZ) Nelson Composers Workshop.

Carried By The Wind

Performed by Ensemble Dal Niente on May 10, 2019, at the University of Chicago.


---
of dust flecks floating in a stream of sunlight
of snow flurries dancing under a street lamp at night
of tiny particles suspended in light

CCCC 20190510

Suspended in Light

Performed by the Aspen Contemporary Ensemble on Aug 9, 2019, at the Aspen Music Festival.

All is still
beneath the moonlit sky
Hear the wind,
the leaves rustling, and the
birds that sing at night

birds that sing at night

Performed by the Aspen Conducting Academy Orchestra on July 14, 2019, at the Aspen Music Festival.

Geoffrey Loff, Conductor

Ashes and Embers

Performed by the Empyrean Ensemble on January 30, 2020, at the Taproot New Music Festival Opening Concert, UC Davis.

Empyrean Ensemble:
Mika Pelo, director
Tod Brody, flute
Peter Josheff, clarinet
Bryce Leafman, percussion 
Michael Seth Orland, piano
Hrabba Atladottir, violin
Ellen Ruth Rose, viola
Thalia Moore, cello
Matilda Hofman, conductor

Yuting Tan

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