detest me

back n forth

mental anguish

naturale

produced by:
@threedimensionsapart
@buginfestedfloorboards
@janeremover
[lyrics]
sometimes i wonder if you ever think about it
then i remember that you said to move on
well last september i was fine with how that sounded
but last september i was always so gone
im overthinking like was i in the wrong?
i guess the writing's always been on the wall
you said you'd never decline if i call
but i called last night and it rang so long

and all the lights in the room went out
im looking round like what do i do now
i started singing but it never made a sound
it felt like no one ever wanted me around
until i met you
you picked me up and gave me someone to confess to
and looking back i wonder if you ever meant to
cause now you're texting me "i wish i never met you"
i still- 

sometimes i wonder if you ever think about it
then i remember that you said to move on
well last september i was fine with how that sounded
but last september i was always so gone
im overthinking like was i in the wrong?
i guess the writing's always been on the wall
you said you'd never decline if call
but i called last night and it rang so long

september (tda + soju + jane)

prod
@1hallow
@suyuki
mixed by @janeremover
[lyrics]
im starting realize that its my fault
cause i dont know where i woke up 
or what we did last night
she tell her mama that im awful
heard he was talking, left his body
where it wont see the light
its 2am, i feel my nose sting 
fuck, i heard my phone ring
i promise ima call you back
too intoxicated, keep it lowkey
please dont say you know me
cause no one ever had my back

all to say, where i've been,
is a mouthful
i cant blame, what you said,
cause im awful
we're on and off like every second
say "i love you" and regret it
cant stay off the pharmaceutics 
all the shit, that you said, 
is a mouthful
say im dumb and misled
guess im awful
you tried your hardest to forget it 
you still call me when your stressing
blame it on the pharmaceutics

i know
that even when you're with him 
you feel alone
and i wish i could help you, but it's
too late now, the sun's gone down
and its cold, its so cold
and when the withdrawls kick, and you feel so sick
well just know
you're still home

all to say, where i've been,
is a mouthful
i cant blame, what you said,
cause im awful
we're on and off like every second
say "i love you" and regret it
cant stay off the pharmaceutics 
all the shit, that you said, 
is a mouthful
say im dumb and misled
guess im awful
you tried your hardest to forget it 
you still call me when your stressing
blame it on the pharmaceutics

awful (hallow + suyuki)

the beat is from a midwxst song called trying someone sent me this and i js made a remix

a song about awareness and paranoia

@1glaive

lyrics:
[ericdoa]
you don't trust me alone
but somehow you're miles away
if the shoe fits in the wrong shit
then its all a waste
the same strut that you do man when you walk away
you moved out of your hometown but its not the same

my heart's stuck on the same shit it wont ever change
old friends losing contact said im acting strange
you pull your hair out in the mirror asking to be saved
i can hear them talking bout me say it to my face
i been dazed and confused tell me to pick it up
i hold my weight in the wrong place hope i dont get crushed
a parking lot in a new place where i fell in love
ill talk later but right now im in a rush

we stopped talkin baby i just hope that we can be friends
she texts back and shes pissed off, she said it depends
well fuck you baby i don't have a hand i can lend
when its all over baby would you treat me less in the end?

[glaive]
and ever since a child yeah i've always been a pessimist
public target crossed up on my back like im a methodist (sick ref ash)
and all these labels, a&r's keep asking what my method is
im just tryna put on for joelle cuz he where heaven is

and if im being frank baby you know im an asshole
imma tell a secret baby you can't tell a damn soul
i've been under so much fucking stress that i can't handle
watch everything that i've ever worked for get dismantled

nah fuck this
i don't really need it
and i just blacked out i think that i might be anemic
fiending for something
it might just be a meaning
and im not being harsh lately you've been fucking tweakin so
and you're dead to me
you're my enemy
i been running out of time and wasting energy
and you say that you my friend but you ain't friends wit me
do you even remember what you said to me?

[ericdoa and glaive]
repeating the same day 
it goes on and on and on
repeating the same day 
it goes on and on and on and on

[ericdoa]
you don't trust me alone
but somehow you're miles away
if the shoe fits in the wrong shit
then its all a waste
the same strut that you do man when you walk away
you moved out of your hometown but its not the same

touché

glaive