as I'm writing this and scheduling this upload on 11-14-25 I'm having a mental breakdown full of anxiety and dread and I really want to delet all my stuff. I constantly want to delete everything and I have to resist the urge. I feel I will eventually break. I am going to therapy for the first time next month but I don't know if that can save me. It feels like I'm trying to fill a hole that keeps getting bigger. I really want to delete all my accounts but I know I will regret it but I don't know how much longer I can keep doing this. My anxiety and dread is killing me today since my dad got out jail for something very bad and I don't even know if he's innocent. My step-dad is also very anxiety inducing and I almost harmed him last week but held back. Him and my mom are fighting but he's a very good Manipulator and he's trying to manipulate me too. I need help but no one can save me but myself. I don't know what to do. My therapist appointment is next month but it's hard to keep waiting since I should have went to one when I was little. I'm so mentally drained and confused constantly. Oh my god I don't know what to do. I don't want attention or fans at all but I want to be heard but it kills me knowing people might hear my stuff. Fuck

rotting_in_myhole

half return

Adrianne Lenker