Yogi creatrix with a deep desire to dance***

Patient Name: Alan Kelly
Alias: “Murderwords”
Clinician: Dr. Scarlett Ruth
Date: 09/08/24
Time: 15:37 PST

This excerpt was my first encounter with a patient named Alan Kelly, whom I took on in 2022, as well as their alter ego persona, one 'Murderwords' who arose in my patient during the mitigation of a nervous breakdown during the events of the global pandemic. Excerpt is audio as follows:

“Why don’t you tell me a little about yourself, Mr. Words?”
“Please, call me Murderwords.”
“Very well. Tell me about yourself, Murderwords.”

“Okay. Well—

Hi. I am Murderwords, a guy who fell into a paper bag mask one day in a music playing accident involving originality while not maintaining situational awareness around an encroaching technocracy of dystopian malaise. I live on Alan's head. 

I would like to share my music with you, imagine that, in the hopes that you might do all those things we need you to do on platforms to keep me going—the sharing, and the liking, and the signing up.

Please don’t make me say ‘like, share, and subscribe.’

Awww, @&%$!

I am slowly migrating some work over from my low-tech facilities and lower-tech mind into this den of inequity.

If you are an artist or musician who is interested in working with me, please send me a message.

Remember kids:
We are not the product. They are.
And we are not content.”

Alan Kelly presents with complex post-traumatic stress disorder rooted in a difficult childhood, and the emergence of the Murderwords persona that arose during the pandemic marks a profound turning point in his life. Murderwords is more than a mask—he is Alan’s inner child given form, a fierce and raw expression of resilience born from pain.

As his therapist, I find this phenomenon both compelling and deeply human: here is a man channeling his trauma into an artistic rebellion against the oppressive forces of the music industry and media censorship. Murderwords is Alan’s way of fighting back, reclaiming control through creativity amid a nervous breakdown.

It’s a fragile balance—this shadow work performed in public—but one I am fascinated by and fully invested in helping him navigate. There is power in this persona, and I believe it carries the potential not only for Alan’s survival but for a bold, authentic voice in today’s fractured cultural landscape, though I reserve my concerns that the mask might eat the man if Alan is not careful.

This is Doctor Scarlett Ruth,
uh, oh nine oh eight of twenty-five at... fifteen thirty-seven hours.

Recorded
arranged 
mixed 
performed 
by afourtrackmind

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