back here after 3yrs an now this hits harder. she left last yr. now i just wish i wasn't existing. 

Proude of you keeping up with your music 

The winds like razors on my skin 
Why did i ever let u in?

the suns not warm like it used to be:(((((

oilcolor: @oilcolor / @moplush 

it’s  like I’m holding on with broken hands 
i see these lies out the corner of my eye 
when i grow up i wanna be a ghost 
so i can see how you feel when i’m not as close

ill pretend i’m in my old bed
tired eyes, tuck me in, pat me on the head 
construct a world in which i’m safe again 
growing up,
giving up 
i wish i’d never left     


full nelson (n,n. x oilcolor)

wooden home

I've got a lot of fear for the day that we'll be dead (prod. tothegood)

produced by depression https://soundcloud.com/teendepression
lyrics n vocals by angelsik <33

lyrics~~
everythings a blur lately and everything is hurting me. And the sun's not warm like it use to be or maybe that's just me. The wind's like razors on my skin, why did i ever let you in? And i cant pretend that i am strong when everything around me feels so wrong.~ can i ask you something before you go, all of these things that I need to know. Like what happened to you and where did you go? I heard your fucking hoes and doing lots of blow, you do it for attention and you do it for the show, all of these things I already know. you say you're doing good but i see you hit your low, Im glad that you had to go. The wind's like razors on my skin, why did i ever let you in? and i cant pretend that i am strong when everything around me feels so wrong. i just need to know before you go, before you go, i just need to know before you go, i just need to know, i just need to know. before you go.

Youcouldhavewarnedme (prod. by depression)

deadbeatteen - When you're around

prod @notmorgn

lyrics: 
hate runs through my veins 
you are a plane 
i am the ground you soar above and laugh
and i, i'm getting old
i grow like mold in all the places you don't wanna see
you, you are the light 
i am the dark
i tried to find you but i got lost 
and i, i'm fucking up
just let me go
cause i've been falling and it's all i know
and i, i'll let you down, i'll make you cry
you don't love me and i'm the reason why
lie, lie to my face
tell me you care
tell me you wanna know who i am
so find, find me cause i am lost and i'm scared of what's to come (x2)

and i am scared of what i'll be
and i am scared of what i'll see

you are everything i'm not (prod. notmorgn)

music video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-4ctisd4N7Q&ab_channel=yesterday

its hard to believe you
and anything you say
dont take it personally
ill talk to myself for days
and think about the things
you do when youre without me
im self detrimental everyday
find a safe space in my brain
where im alone with you
i can say the things i always wanted to say

trust issues, i wish youd stay
theyre eating me away
trust issues, i wish youd say
something to ease the pain

its like you say things but you mean something else
the barren trees start reaching out to me
as i drive my car through familiar places
the only limits my imagination
when it comes to you
blind faith has proved
that im such a sucker

Follow me <3

trust issues

spotify: https://open.spotify.com/track/2HMWD42soFuSYUuohmG6Rq?si=XrW0bnMYT5eITOsi3zRxcQ
download: https://hrvestmusic.bandcamp.com/track/black-reflection-w-notmorgn
sample: tim hecker - black refraction 
vocals by @guccihighwaters & harvest
production by harvest

notmorgn
when i look up in the mirror nothings to be seen
but when im staring in your eyes im recognizing everything 
all the pieces fit together i can change just like the weather
i can move without you float about just like a feather
and without you im so different 
i can see the future thats why i was so distant 
u thought you knew it all just from your dreams
but little did you know it was a part of my scheme

harvest
i have learned to catch
all the images that have burned to black
why do you ask
it's not like clarity runs away so fast

you're a black reflection let me run away
all the images burn as the dust fades x2

notmorgn
you're a black reflection let me run away x2

harvest & notmorgn
you never really understand
the little details of this plan
you never really understand
i'm never coming home again x2

cover art edited/taken by me
mixed by notmorgn & harvest

spotify

black reflection w/ guccihighwaters

Forever In Love  produced by suddencold

lyrics: 

baby i would die for u
suicideforu
i don't know where ur at where u been
but i'm so proud of u
baby i'm a fragile soul
i'm jus reapin what i sowed
i think i might lose control
spin the wheel n then i roll
u say u don't love urself
i could love enough for the both of us
i'd be happier if it was just the 2 of us
i wish i was happy as those pictures u drew
all the shit i go thru 
i'm still cryin without u

baby suicideforu 
take my fuckin life for u
i just want u to be happy pain u shouldn't go thru
baby i'm a fuckin mess
i feel heartache in my chest
maybe i just need some rest
maybe in time i'll forget
i just wanna love u again
i still wanna be more than just friends
ill be here for u u til my bitter end
for right now i guess i'll just pretend

Youcouldhavewarnedme (prod. by depression)

Angelsik

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