Name: When The Lawsuit Implodes(remastered) by Anthony Charles Esq.
Duration: 3 min 45 s
Description: Lolsuit fun with this Jimmy Buffet parody

A Southern outlaw gospel for the damned and divine.

From the haunted backroads of redemption to the fiery chaos of meth-lab miracles, “Hellbent & Holy” is a genre-splittin’, soul-rippin’ country storm.

13 hard-hittin’ tracks dripping in moonshine, broken hearts, rusty pickups, and righteous fury. This album walks the line between God and the Devil — with a shotgun in hand and two wild hearts in the truck bed.

Produced with grit, sung with blood, and driven by pure outlaw energy.

Quit Your Bitchin’ (Extended Outlaw Mix 2)

Made for The Dick Show

http://thedickshow.com

THE DICK SHOW

ENIGMA RIDER feat. THE DICK SHOW

A remix in celebration of The Dick Show podcast.

The Dick Show Remixes

Every Moment Of Your Life

Written, performed and produced by MCMC ©2017

As heard on episode 69 of The Dick Show (36m11s): http://thedickshow.com/episode-69/

Lyrics:

Sean, you're the most handomest man in the world,
I wish that I was  girl,
Or that you were gay coz that way,
You could be inside of me

Sean, ever since I heard,
You're weird fat voice saying words,
I thought I knew, that you,
Were an obese ginger smoking herb,

But then I ponied up the dough and saw your face on the livestream,
I'm a straight man but I gotta say you're really testing me,
I don't even care if I have to share you with Layc,
I'm yours, I'm yours, oh Sean

Now I know you like a good pop hook so I'm hooking you good, I hope I'm doing it good for you, Seany
I really hope I got a good pop hook, as good as how good Sean looks, and I hope it makes you, hope it makes you, hope it makes you, horny

Sean, you're the most handomest man in the world,
I wish that I was  girl,
Or that you were gay coz that way,
You could be inside of me

Sean Love

An old man
In his 40's couldn't wait
Bought his ticket in new york
And got his court date
Bountiful Boy
A curious page
Apostraphes placed
By a furious ape
Wasn't he iconic?
Don't you think?

SHE GOT BAAAAAAAANGED
ON A WEDDING DAY!
NOW HE'S GONE AND FILED
SAYIN HE'LL GET PAID
ITS A GENOCIDE
ON YOUR WHOLE FANBASE
NOW TELL ME WHICH PRO-
-BLEM'S BIGGER!!!!??????

Mr. headspace
Mr. New York Times
The best web page
Oh my, my how the time flies
He spent his WHOLE DAMN LIFE
Three books, one website
When he went down in flames
He swore he was still cool as ice
Wasn't it iconic?
Don't you think?

It's a patreon
Where nobody gets paid
It's a websiiiiiiiiiiiiite
That costs 30 fuckin K
Its a network, where
They think its ok
WHEN INBRED JOE DIRT
SHOUTS NIG*BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP*

Well life has a funny way
Of sneakin up on you when you self-inflict butt pain
and cry out in the niiiiiiiiight
Did it have to down in flames?
Was it so bad? Was everything really a-ok?
You should've really done season 3 (thrayyyy)

It's over man, turn back
before its too late
You'll be bum cummin on the street
When you lose this dumb case
If you screenshot dick's page, well buddy
that's alright!
We won't even mention
All your girl's much cooler guys
And isn't this ironic?
Don't you think?
A little too iconic
You hit the iceberg and sank

ITS TIM CHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANGZ
SIGNIN' NDA'S!
IT'S AN 8CHAN FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIND
THAT WE JUST DIDN'T MAKE
IT'S GOOD ADVIIIIIIIIIICE
TURN BACK, SAVE FACE!
Cuz Dick is for sure
The winnerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Life has a funny way
Of letting you fuck youuuuuu
Landua has a funny funny way
of helpin' you out!
Drop this case now!

Wasn't He Iconic - Hazencruz

Lolsuit fun with this Jimmy Buffet parody

When The Lawsuit Implodes(remastered)

I get up, and watch my girl go down
On some dude while clubbing downtown
And I know, baby just how it feels
(To cook my) favorite soup and listen to my girlfriend squeal

Ah can't ya see me standing here I got my back against our washing machine
Watching him removing your jeans
My girlfriend's sucking his peen

Ah, might as well cuck (cuck!)
Might as well cuck
Go head and cuck (cuck!)
Go head and cuck

Ow ow, hehehe
Can I join? Okay I'll sit back down
She says I must watch, so I watch him go to brown town

Ah can't you see her take deposits like
an automated teller machine?
This dude just busted his cream
I guess I'll begin to clean

Ah, might as well cuck (cuck!)
Might as well cuck
Go head and cuck (cuck!)
Go head and cuck

Ah, might as well cuck (cuck!)
Might as well cuck
Go head and cuck (cuck!)
Go head and cuck

A Cuckold's Valentine's Day

Cuck

Check out my ramshackle rewards at www.patreon.com/kendollinhide

[Parody of "Family Affair" by Mary J Blige]
[thumbnail by https://twitter.com/geistpolizei]

LYRICS

My lawyer's drunk, let's sue someone
For making photoshops of me
Responses droppin', I'm not stoppin'
Still white-knighting cuckoldry
Don't need no stupid patrons, You-Tube Station
Subs are leaving me
Soon Nick will start lawsplaining, while you're waiting
Come on sing with me

Patreon's response just fucked me up
Greenberger wants to prove that I'm a cuck
Soon I won't have a single fan in sight
But trust me everything's alright (everything's alright)
Commercial court this sucks, hey please hurry
Lock Dick up and throw away the key
I can't take these lawer fees no more
Now I'm super broke just like my door

My lawyer's drunk, let's sue someone
For commenting on horse cock tweets
Responses droppin', I'm not stoppin'
Guys surprise Heather is me!
Let's have a toast to past co-hosts, they're farming ass
On crime podcasts
Two hours 'til Nick's lawsplaining, while you're waiting
Come on sing with me

It's only gonna be a matter of time
When this gets dismissed I'll really loose my mind
Jordan's lawyers, they're as cold as ice
Said my shit's ramshackled, that's not nice
Now I'm getting fat and you're all superchatin'
'Cause I'm suing everybody way out in Manhattan
Let's party just be careful with my flimsy door
Take a page from my book, cop a feel on the dance floor!

My lawyer's drunk, let's sue someone
Who made some Cuckmas songs for me
Responses droppin', I'm not stoppin'
Lando, more apostrophes
Don't need no stupid patrons, You-Tube Station
Subs are leavin' me
Soon Nick will start lawsplaining, while you're waiting
Come on sing with me

If you tweet, you'll need a lawyer (yeah you'll need a lawyer)
It's easy to sue one another
Everybody stop trying to have a good time
No more having fun online
Defend your first amendment on your own dime
If you lose your rights, your problem not mine
3 years later, I still cried
Now you guys will drink and laugh at me all night (all night)
I don't want no beef no problem no fights
Just wanna warn schools to watch their Christmas lights
Yo Madcucks is free he doesn't have to run
Lando, you really screwed the pooch on this one
Are you passed out?  "It's just an asthma attack"
Wake up we need to win and get 80s girl back (I miss you <3)

My lawyer's drunk, let's sue someone
Who made a parody of me
Responses droppin', I'm not stoppin'
Still calling schools with Jane D.
Don't need no stupid patrons, You-Tube Station
Subs are leaving me
Soon Nick will start lawsplaining, while you're waiting
Come on sing with me

A Ramshackle Affair

At www.patreon.com/kendollinhide the polls only cost $1.00 a month (free if you count the botholes)
LYRICS
Hey, fuck Dick
Hey, fuck Dick
Hey, fuck Dick
Where's my journalist?

I've been searching for a man, who's still somehow my fan
Just to find, to find my journalist
Who does his interviews, based solely on the views
Yes I need, I need my journalist

Hey Mad Dix I'm your little journalist
You'll love this, I won't call you on your shit
Kiss kiss kiss I'm your little journalist
Bring those clicks, looks at these animal dicks

"Speaking of Dicks, these Dickheads are a real pain... in the bothole!"

I've been searching on youtube, and here on twitter too
Just to find, to find my journalist
Someone who will shill, and keep himself bluepilled
Yes I need, I need my journalist

Hey watch this, I'm your little journalist
I make $10 polls, only cover news that's old
I'm a prick, I'm your little journalist
Dick's tweets are merciless, my job's hard and dangerous

Fuck Dick (fuck Dick)
Fuck Dick (fuck Dick)
Fuck Dick Will you be my journalist?
Fuck Dick (fuck Dick)
Fuck Dick (fuck Dick)
Fuck Dick Yes I'll be your journalist

"You're a stand up guy, I can tell.  I'll let you have one of my unbiased polls for free.
Do you think 
A) Pim Tool is the best journalist in the world, or 
B) Sonic is stupid."
"A"
"Wow, thanks!"

Fuck Dick (fuck Dick)
Fuck Dick (fuck Dick)
Fuck Dick Will you be my journalist?
Fuck Dick (fuck Dick)
Fuck Dick (fuck Dick)
Fuck Dick Yes I'll be your journalist

I'm so glad I found you, @pim_tool
You can be my be my journalist
One thing I missed, touch my beanie, I'll be pissed!
Whatever, that's fine
K I'll be your journalist

Journalist, journalist, journalist, you're my favorite journalist
Journalist, journalist, journalist, I'm my favorite journalist

"This job IS really dangerous. Any day I could accidentally report on something before you've all heard about it. And then I'd have to like do research and come up with my own ideas and.. I dunno, it's really scary. You guys are lucky to have me."

[Original song is Butterfly by Smile.Dk https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QzcvRDWgRIE The instrumental I used was edited by some dude called 6thJester]

My Journalist feat. Pim Tool

Lyrics:

How could this be? Is this the end for you and me?
I don’t know if I was even close to ready
You disappeared so quick, went to Dick; I’m jelly
This is a travesty I’ll write you desperately
A quick email only 50 thousand words
Only 50 thousand words
This could be my last chance to get you back, Sean.

Maybe I’ll write a letter like I did for 80’s girl. I know that went over well. I mean she’s still with Dick but she’s definitely still thinking about that

Hello and welcome to the Greatest Letter in the Universe. I’m writing to you hoping that your exit from me will reverse. You see, I plea that the quality of my podcasting has suffered greatly, but I don’t know if I will ever admit that openly.
Rucka Rucka Ali had to leave taking out one of the few things that you could call ‘funny’ on my show since you know my life’s the joke and I can’t channel that into a way to earn dough. Vote up indignant co-hosts you see not me, Ali, with that new haircut he got as a way to mock the hairless person that is me. Okay I may be projecting however he followed suit the moment that you left us Sean I got an engineer who’s a fucking moron. Though, nothing compares to that person who farmed lots of ass, sativa man you outclass anyone I could afford.
You went to Dick real quick despite seeing the absolute gold mine that is the brain that is mine with the ability to decide relevant topics worldwide, watch as I pick a side, then pick the other side how are people unsatisfied? I know, it’s them not me. It’s my stupid fans that’s a guarantee, not the SJW that I’ve become once a satire now a humdrum. Speaking of Dick have you seen, the News Babes that he can glean? That seems like a good bit maybe I can copy it

How could this be? Is this the end for you and me?
I don’t know if I was even close to ready
You disappeared so quick, went to Dick; I’m jelly
This is a travesty I’ll write you desperately
A quick email only 50 thousand words

Heh this is looking good so far. I’m going to take a break for some fruit. And some soup. I’ll check twitter to see if Sean’s on there yet. Oh, oh he’s still not.

    I really hope the issue wasn’t that despite hiring you to be our engineer I took things into my own hands out of fear that you would leave in things that Dick said that went against the values I bled and wore on my sleeve while pretending to believe that I held my book quite highly. Cop a feel, now I disavow nicely. Once and always a flake, a has-been, a comedy fake, mistake after mistake, I trust the dog bite lawyer, mental jess, call their employers, sue them all they said I don’t think this could be the reason that you fled.
But, if you give me whatever chance this may be, I know that I deserve you way more than you deserve me. Please come back I beg you I can’t pay that’s true my Patreon is barely above two-hundred dollars a month and I’ve got no sponsors you see. Kendall and Hyde they left me, who would think that my listeners couldn’t afford four-hundred dollar bags even with a coupon that got them 40 dollars off. They saw madbucks was a ripoff, Sean I need you back.

How could this be? Is this the end for you and me?
I don’t know if I was even close to ready
You disappeared so quick, went to Dick; I’m jelly
This is a travesty I’ll write you desperately
A quick email only 50 thousand words
~~
GO TO THIS LINK FOR AN AWESOME PODCAST (and context)
thedickshow.com/
And Support them on PATREON
www.patreon.com/thedickshow

Losing a Love ft. Savestate Corrupted

Did you know that you can send me mean messages at www.patreon.com/kendollinhide I won't try to have your family torn apart?

Yo, Heather
(Yo)
Open up, Heather
(Yeah, what do you want, man?)
This bully just messaged me
(OMG are you okay?)
I don't know how this happened
(Does she have children?)
Yeah, it looks like she does
Should I just block her? I don't know what to do
(Call CPS)
Alright

Lady came in and she sent me a message
Relaying what her husband said
Picture this, I sobbing butt naked
Watching TDS in my cuck shed
How could I forget that I had
Opened up DMs last week
All these years I've been bragging how
These haterz just do not phase me

We'll get this lady fired so she doesn't have no scrilla
Follow these steps after crying in your pilla
We'll turn you from a wimpy cuck into a job killa
Then you and Lando sue her, yo I bet that you could winna
To be a true weirdo gotta be super weird
Use this pic of her, her kid and husband with the beard
Gotta let her know mean words aren't okay
Threaten to have her child taken away

But I don't even know her (Call CPS)
What if she's a good mother? (Call CPS)
Okay I'll cry to big brother (Call CPS)
But first I want some clam chowder (Call CPS)
Then I'll e-mail her employer (Call CPS)
This photoshop really showed her (Call CPS)
I'm acting like a creepy voyeur (Call CPS)
She'll be hearing from my lawyer

Lady came in and she sent me a message
Relaying what her husband said
Picture this, yo she even used curse words
Implying my career is dead
How could I forget that I'm a
Washed up e-celebrity
All these years I've been bragging how
These haterz just do not phase me

We need to try to take her parents from this little girl
Here call their local CPS give it a whirl
Don't worry it's so easy to complain, not complex
Just lie and say their babysitter's Clegg, they'll get wrecked
These haterz always drudging up old shit from the past
Comparing TDS Chad to Virgin Sadcast
For once we're going to get one over on a Dickhead
Don't let it go we'll just abuse the system instead

Are you sure I should do this? (Call CPS)
Won't it make me look stupid? (Call CPS)
K what's the number fine I'll call them(Call CPS)
Families are a big problem (Call CPS)
Her reputations will be ruined (Call CPS)
Then I'll get back to my suin' (Call CPS)
Hey by the way, this reminds me(Call CPS)
I used to work in telemarketing

Lady came in and she sent me a message
Relaying what her husband said
Cause I always cross the line with this shit
How could I forget that all my
Conversations end up leaked
All these years I've been bragging how
These haterz just do not phase me

I hope they put her kid in foster care
For the stress that she's caused
I ignore all criticism
It makes no sense at all
Dick should pay me 20 million
For the shit his fan's say
But don't hold my brand accountable
For views held by Clegg

When The Lawsuit Implodes(remastered)

Anthony Charles Esq.

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