Someone should make psytrance version of this.

My soul is a hidden orchestra; I know not what instruments, what fiddlestrings and harps, drums and tamboura I sound and clash inside myself. All I hear is the symphony.
-Fernando Pessoa

The Story Of An Unknown Actor, 1976.

nicole kidman voice in the hours movie 

Dearest, 
I feel certain I am going mad again. I feel we can't go through another of those terrible times. And I shan't recover this time. I begin to hear voices, and I can't concentrate. So I am doing what seems the best thing to do. 

You have given me the greatest possible happiness. You have been in every way all that anyone could be. I don't think two people could have been happier till this terrible disease came. I can't fight any longer. I know that I am spoiling your life, that without me you could work. And you will I know. 

You see I can't even write this properly. I can't read. What I want to say is I owe all the happiness of my life to you. You have been entirely patient with me and incredibly good. I want to say that - everybody knows it. If anybody could have saved me it would have been you. Everything has gone from me but the certainty of your goodness. I can't go on spoiling your life any longer.

I don't think two people could have been happier than we have been.

virginia woolf Suicide Letter To Leonard Woolf

(Read by: Tom O'Bedlam)

"الطريق كلّه - للشاعر: تشارلز بوكوفسكي - ترجمة: أوس خليل" 


إذا كنت عازما على التجربة، أمضي الطريق كلّه
و إلّا، لا تبدأ مطلقا.
قد يعني هذا فقدان صديقات حميمات، زوجات، أقارب، وربما عقلك.
قد يعني هذا عدم تناول الطعام لثلاثة أيام أو أربع.
قد يعني التجمّد على دكّة حديقة عامّة.
قد يعني السجن.
قد يعني السخرية.
قد يعني الإستهزاء \العزلة.
العزلة هي الهدية.
الجميع سيختبرون قدرتك على التحمّل، وكم تريد حقًا أن تفعل ذلك.
وانت، ستفعلها، على الرغم من الرفض وأسوأ الإحتمالات.
وستكون أفضل من أي شيء يمكنك تخيّله.
إذا كنت عازما على التجربة، أمضي الطريق كلّه.
ليس هناك شعور يضاهي هذا.
ستكون وحيدًا مع الآلهه.
والليالي سوف تشتعل بالنار.
سوف تروّض الحياة مباشرة لضحكة مثالية.
إنها المعركة الجيدة الوحيدة هناك.


"If you're going to try, go all the way. Otherwise, don't even start. This could mean losing girlfriends, wives, relatives and maybe even your mind. It could mean not eating for three or four days. It could mean freezing on a park bench. It could mean jail. It could mean derision. It could mean mockery--isolation. Isolation is the gift. All the others are a test of your endurance, of how much you really want to do it. And, you'll do it, despite rejection and the worst odds. And it will be better than anything else you can imagine. If you're going to try, go all the way. There is no other feeling like that. You will be alone with the gods, and the nights will flame with fire. You will ride life straight to perfect laughter. It's the only good fight there is."


- Charles Bukowski, Factotum


[ Charles Bukowski - All The Way ] - [ تشارلز بوكوفسكي - الطريق كلّه ]

Sombra

"Postcard From 1952" off Take Care, Take Care, Take Care 

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Postcard From 1952

Lovers walk holding hands in pouring rain.
Children play in the park, time for mud stains.
I'll sit back enjoy myself, my life's not lame.

Suits, cars and finer things these all remain.
Stable jobs are roofs above, that's why we're safe.
There's a feeling I will change, then I hear them say 

"We are offering this perfect life 
Take the pledge and just don't think twice.
That's the right choice, without us you'll die 
That's for your own sake, and all of mankind"

I won't take part of your miserable lives.
Stacks of cash, plastic love and your fake smiles.
Dishonesty, no purity you're left with sick minds


Suits, cars and finer things these are all vain.
Stable jobs push you down the line to becoming insane.
Maybe that floats your boat, but that's not my game.


"We are playing with your slippery minds.
Turn a blind eye as we milk you dry.
Never doubt there's a pie in the sky.
We set the rules and the rules never die"

Slippery Minds

read by Tom O'Bedlam

“Alone”
BY EDGAR ALLAN POE
________________

From childhood’s hour I have not been 
As others were I have not seen 
As others saw I could not bring 
My passions from a common spring


From the same source I have not taken 
My sorrow I could not awaken 
My heart to joy at the same tone
And all I lov’d I lov’d alone
Then in my childhood in the dawn 
Of a most stormy life was drawn 
From ev’ry depth of good and ill 
The mystery which binds me still
From the torrent, or the fountain
From the red cliff of the mountain 
From the sun that ’round me roll’d 
In its autumn tint of gold 
From the lightning in the sky 
As it pass’d me flying by
From the thunder, and the storm
And the cloud that took the form 
(When the rest of Heaven was blue) 
Of a demon in my view

________________________________
So Now? by Charles Bukowski

the words have come and gone,
I sit ill.
the phone rings, the cats sleep.
Linda vacuums.
I am waiting to live,
waiting to die. 
I wish I could ring in some bravery.
it's a lousy fix
but the tree outside doesn't know:
I watch it moving with the wind
in the late afternoon sun. 
there's nothing to declare here,
just a waiting.
each faces it alone. 
Oh, I was once young,
Oh, I was once unbelievably
young!

"Alone"  Edgar Allan Poe -  So Now?  Charles Bukowski

taken from "the return of stravinsky wellington" - release june 2nd, 2017

MELODY X 

now you look for love in a time of hate / how many swipes for a blow of fate / you keep the light on / you keep the light on / you keep the night light on / every day is like the same old song / until everything right goes wrong / you keep the light on / you keep the light on / you keep the night light on / hold your broken dream up high / you know you try / oh you know you try / it’s the worst case scenario lullaby / and then the rent is just a little too late / ain’t gonna be no birthday cake / you keep the light on / you keep the light on / you keep the night light on / hold your broken dream up high / you know you try / oh you know you try / it’s the worst case scenario lullaby / even if the cops come and knock on your door / and the pills spill out on the floor / you keep the light on / you keep the light on / you keep the night light on / hold your broken dream up high / you know you try / oh you know you try / it’s the worst case scenario lullaby / something’s gotta change / something’s gotta change / hold on / hold on / hold on to something good / something’s gotta change / something’s gotta change / hold on / hold on / hold on to something good / try to sooth yourself to sleep my dear / you know this whole mess is born from fear / you keep the light on / you keep the light on / keep the night light on / keep the light on / the light on / the night light on

The Return Of Stravinsky Wellington

Melody X

Low - Last Night I Dreamt That Somebody Loved Me

Charles Bukowski - THE MIND / GO ALL THE WAY ᴴᴰ

Sophie Jamieson - The Weight Comes

الموسيقى ألغت إحتمال ان تكون الحياة غلطة .
-نيتشه-

[ Charles Bukowski - All The Way ] - [ تشارلز بوكوفسكي - الطريق كلّه ]

Aws | أوس

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Michael DeSantis

Michael DeSantis

Almost Normally

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