expansive, melodic instrumental feat. piano  & guitars

uplift

I felt like a very Netrek mood and at the same time something about quantum chromodynamics.

Dedicated to Tom Youderian, Scott Humphreys, Sheldon on Big Bang Theory and every International Netrek League (INL) Team I had the pleasure to cross swords with, in any era.

my main website:
http://exedexes1.com

itch.io page:
http://exedexes1.itch.io

intro:

Feeling time to rank scum maybe

Iggy says hasta la vista baybee

main:

There once was a man of science

Who placed a great reliance

On Fleming's sagely tome


While the others in their hammocks

Dreamt of quantum chromodynamics

He paced about the sandy loam


Having grown extremely weary

Of perusing the Onium Theory

He shook his burly fists

exclaiming 'Mucus Pig Exists!'

And vanished into the Quantum Foam

SepteDeka

The Quantum Foam

Buy on Bandcamp

I'VE NO MORE FUCKS TO GIVE
Music by Thomas Benjamin Wild Esq
Jazz Arrangement by Overdrive

This is my jazz version of the hilarious song by Thomas Benjamin Wild Esq. Of course, the influence of Richard Cheese and his outrageous lounge music versions of famous rock songs is undeniable.

Check out the amazing original version by Thomas Benjamin Wild Esq:
https://youtu.be/TXK03FHVsHk

Some of my favorite Richard Cheese parodies:

Rock The Casbah by The Clash:
https://youtu.be/fPRaQ43T_oQ

Closer, by NIN:
https://youtu.be/TmvlB1H1ejI

Only Happy When It Rains, by Garbage:
https://youtu.be/9dI-gKsT2DA

Hope you like this new jazz version of I've No More Fucks To Give.

LYRICS
I'VE NO MORE FUCKS TO GIVE

I've tried, tried, tried, and I've tried even more
I've cried, cried, cried, and I can't recall what for
I've pressed, I've pushed, I've yelled, I've begged in hopes of some success
But the inevitable fact is that it never will impress

I've no more fucks to give, my fucks have runneth dry
I've tried to go fuck shopping but there's no fucks left to buy
I've no more fucks to give, though more fucks I've tried to get
I'm over my fuck budget and I'm now in fucking debt

I strived, strived, strived, to get everything done
I played by all the rules, but I very rarely won
I've smiled, I've charmed, I've wooed and laughed, alas to no avail
I've run 'round like a moron to unequivocally fail

I've no more fucks to give, my fuck fuse has just blown
I've been hunting for my fucks all day
But they've upped and fucked off home
I've no more fucks to give, my fuck rations are depleted
I've rallied my fuck army, but it's been fucking defeated

The effort has just not been worth the time or the expense
I've exhausted all my energy for minimal recompense
The distinct lack of acknowledgement has now begun to gall
And I've come to realise that I don't give a fuck at all

I've no more fucks to give, my fucks have flown away
My fucks are now so fucked off they refuse to fucking stay
I've no more fucks to give, my fucks have gone insane
They've come back round and passed me while they're fucking off again

I've no more fucks to give, my fucks have all dissolved
I've planned many projects, but my fucks won't be involved
I've no more fucks to give, my fucks have all been spent
They've fucked off from the building and I don't know where they went

I've no more fucks to give
I've no more fucks to give
I've no more fucks, I've no more fucks, I've no more fucks to give

I've No More Fucks To Give

Thanks to my friend Charlie for rocking this collaboration 
more of his music @ https://soundcloud.com/charliewillz
photo by Ashley_Minkus

Supper - Charlie Williams

Fun Pop Rock song about guy who is with a girl who pulls all the strings, but he doesn't care as long as she wants to be with him. 


Lyrics:

As Long As I Have You 
(c) 2024   Gary Randman

[Chorus]
I don't care if the world thinks
You got me hanging by a string
And I don't care if you use me
You can spend all my money
I don't care, as long as I have you
And I don't mind, as long as I have you


[Verse 1]
You say want to find yourself, I'm on your side
Trying all the latest craze, to me that's fine
My heart rules the way and my mind just obeys
Babe you're the one for me 

[Chorus]
I don't care if the world thinks
You got me hanging by a string
And I don't care if you use me
You can spend all my money
I don't care, as long as I have you
And I don't mind, as long as I have you

[Verse 2]
You go and buy the stylish clothes, I won't deny
Hanging with your friends all day,  I'll let it slide
Don't care what they say and my feelings won't change
Babe you're the one for me

[Chorus]
I don't care if the world thinks
You got me hanging by a string
And I don't care if you use me
You can spend all my money
I don't care, as long as I have you
And I don't mind, as long as I have you

[Instrumental Bridge]

[Verse 3]
You want to sleep til late, hey that's alright
Staying in the house all day,  I will abide
Won't ask you to change,  cause your love's what I crave
Babe you're the one for me

[Chorus]
I don't care if the world thinks
You got me hanging by a string
And I don't care if you use me
You can spend all my money
I don't care, as long as I have you
And I don't mind, as long as I have you
and I won't care, as long as I have you

As Long As I Have You [Rough Demo]

I see the cracks beneath your skin
The places where the light’s worn thin
You wear your strength like armor cold
But I can feel the weight you hold

You think you’re strong, but I see through
The truth is I’m fragile too

Fragile like the morning rain
Breaking but we rise again
We carry scars, we play it cool
But I’m fragile, fragile too

You hide your fears behind your smile
I’ve seen them linger for a while

It’s not just you, it’s me, it’s us
In fragile hands, we build our trust

Fragile like the morning rain
Breaking but we rise again
We carry scars, we play it cool
But I’m fragile, fragile too

Let’s stop pretending we don’t break
It’s in the cracks our shapes take place
I’ll hold your shadows, hold them close
If you’ll carry mine, I’ll let them go

Fragile like the morning rain
Breaking but we rise again
We’ve carried scars, we’ve played it cool
But I’m fragile, fragile too

Fragile like the open sky
Shattered but we learn to fly
In every flaw, a light shines through
Because I’m fragile, fragile too

I see the cracks beneath your skin
The places where the light gets in

Fragile Too

DOOMSDAY

BoomBoomSauce

This beautiful ballad was created during the creation of the trance version. I think this version is too beautiful not to be heard. I especially like the melody and the vocal emphasis of the lyrics.

If i could (Piano Version)

“Tome of Stars” is a 100 sonnet journey, equal parts art, therapy journal, and exorcism, both a celebration and an elegy, a single narrative arc tracing the birth and death of a relationship. All poetry by Stargazer. The verse and accompanying synthetic art and music are public domain, CC0, with no restrictions on use. Nothing is monetized. See below for links on how to access the print, PDF, audio, ePub, video, and music files. 
Website: https://www.tomeofstars.net/

In the classical margam of bharatanatyam, the varnam is the recital’s centerpiece, its longest and most emotionally charged performance. In “Tome of Stars“, the varnam appears as the twenty-nine-poem section “Senescence”. Following the exaltation of Anthesis, the beloved as a celestial goddess, love now descends from the stars into the gravity of human frailty. 

“Caniclades” is a hybrid neologism combining canities, the Latin term for the graying of hair (from canus, “white” or “gray-haired”), and clades, meaning “disaster,” “ruin,” or “calamity.” 

This sonnet recounts a pivotal moment in the relationship—one the poet failed to fully grasp at the time, but later recognized as a potent harbinger of collapse. Centered on the seemingly minor discovery of the beloved’s first gray hair, the event revealed underlying insecurities shaped by cultural ideals of youth, beauty, and the fear of aging without fulfillment. Beneath the surface, it unearthed the deeper ache of a woman moving through her years of anthesis and fertility while her life remained suspended. She began to see herself stagnating, watching from within a constrained relationship as the freedoms others took for granted such as love, movement, family, visibility—passed her by. 

The poet’s response, though sincere, fell short of meeting the complexity of her pain. The sonnet reflects on this chasm between presence and absence, intention and impact. In retrospect, the poet identifies this exchange as a decisive fracture: a moment when the beloved’s unspoken needs (especially around womanhood, aging, and self-worth), surfaced unmistakably, and could no longer be ignored, while capturing his failure to recognize the underlying pathos.

***********
Lyrics

I stood as beacon in your darkest plights,
Each tempest wild that rocked your fragile craft—
From scholar’s struggles late through many nights,
To strife with guru’s slights, choreographed. 

You vowed, so certain, time would bring no dread,  
And when bright silver wove your strands of night,  
No fear nor dye would rest upon your head,  
For nothing could diminish our love’s light.

Then came your call, one strand of gray revealed.
Though I proclaimed you Star Queen all my days,
My chanted words your venomed voice repealed:
“Your music fails,” you spat, with distant gaze.

I see now that our union was your need,
And on this day our doom you had decreed.

***********

Internet Archive
Book of sonnets:
https://archive.org/details/tome-of-stars/

Music:
Item 1, Anthesis: https://archive.org/details/Anthesis/
Item 2, Senescence: https://archive.org/details/senescence_tomeofstars
Item 3, Sporogenesis: https://archive.org/details/Sporogenesis_TomeOfStars/
Item 4, Anemochory: https://archive.org/details/Anemochory_TomeOfStars
Item 5, Quixotosis: https://archive.org/details/Quixotosis_TomeOfStars
Item 6, Scripture: https://archive.org/details/Scripture_TomeOfStars

Caniclades

Inspired by BB King and a lot of the old blues players on this track

Fragile Too

Axioms of Mediocrity