My Mix

6.
prod. awfuldrama

I’m anxious, so I’m sorry for saying sorry uh
You fake it like nobody, like nobody does
Set the pace then, when you climb on, when you ride on top
Make it painless, when you fuck me, when you fuck me up

Cause it’s the inevitable that you’ll leave
No one seems to stay with me
Pessimistic, I know
Just realistic that’s how it goes
Could you call me before I get the wrong idea
Cause I’m stressing with you not right here

I’m anxious, so I’m sorry for saying sorry uh
You fake it like nobody, like nobody does
Set the pace then, when you climb on, when you ride on top
Make it painless, when you fuck me, when you fuck me up

sorry for saying sorry

body going missing

prod: https://soundcloud.com/block-tane https://soundcloud.com/nate2timezz
 
i can hear my own heartbeat
pound in this quiet
hands bound back
with this rope
he'll tie me up
(i can hear my own heartbeat pounding
i can hear my own heartbeat pounding)
i can feel the cold concrete
laying down, crying
itching through scabs
to be whole is all i want
(i can hear my own heartbeat pounding
i can hear my own heartbeat pounding)
open me up
god willing i'll make it
your shirt soaking with blood
oh, my body keep shaking
place my flesh upon a sigil
brand with my initials
this night will make me whole again
the embers start to whistle
nothing left, no one to hold me
bloody ceremony
i will lose control again,
the heavens will disown me

please, please
it's all that i have
(like magician, body going)

like magician,
body going missing
bloodied up my palms
baby i feel like a christian
just how i envisioned
prep for the incision
pierce right through my heart
until my fingers finish twitching
oh yeah,
i think i like it, i don't wanna pretend
i'm fucking begging for it
cut me again
and again, and again, and again
and again

(let us pray, let us wish
to partake in communion,
let us partake in communion,
and feast upon the old blood)

where i'm going
i won't make it back
hope he's waiting for me
vision going black
nothing i have left will make it past
open me up
god willing i'll make it
your shirt soaking with blood
oh my body keeps shaking
keeps shaking


paleblood

2.
prod. awfuldrama 

I felt so awful for how I treated you
You’re leaving me, tell me why so soon?
(Why so soon, tell me why so soon)
Now its just me left here inside this room
And all I smell is your perfume

And I’m calling out to you
You’re on the other side 
Of the river 
And there’s nothing left to do
But to photograph your life
And leave it all, in the picture 
I feel it all slip out of my hands
You said we shoulda just stuck to our plans
All good in hindsight, yeah I guess
And I’ve been blindsided by a friend 
At least someone I thought was here for me
Yeah I guess it’s not always what it seems
Had to take a step back, God, I had to breath
I’ve really gotta fucking have a rethink 

I felt so awful for how I treated you
You’re leaving me, tell me why so soon?
(Why so soon, tell me why so soon)
Now its just me left here inside this room
And all I smell is your perfume

perfume

I been away dipping in and out of reality for the past few months isolating, so I hope you enjoy some of this :) 
Produced by my bro @Sinxi 

Lyrics

Never took too long
To figure out if this is right here from the start
I know feelings, different paces, different hearts
They all forget me in the end, it's only dark
And I know my only way out
Is to find someone else to hate now
You turned the lights off, let my guard down
How can you say you want to stay now?

Please, tell me
What I need
To get out this hell
'Cause I love what you bring
But it's death, and I hope that I stay

You blame the timing
But when it's night, it's day
I hate the fighting
Crying, lying through your teeth
And I know my sins
They may lay two times deep
But I'm still trying, trying
Mix myself with hate

'Cause I know, it's hard to love you anymore
I barely recognize the door
Inside this room I spend my nights
Sitting on the floor
Can barely move, I smell perfume you can't afford

You know what I've been seeing
Heart has been breathing
I don't believe in these thoughts that I said
I scale the evens, you're still deceiving
Something I can't be keeping for no man
I'll wear your time, allow my heart to breathe your scars
And lose your skin
And I know I try
Lord knows I'll die
At one last try
It has to end

Please, tell me
What I need
To get out this hell
'Cause I love what you bring
But it's death, and I hope that I stay

You blame the timing
But when it's night, it's day
I hate the fighting
Crying, lying through your teeth
And I know my sins
They may lay two times deep
But I'm still trying, trying
Mix myself with hate

'Cause I know

Beauty for Ashes

3. 
prod. sinxi & oc

Everyday is starting to feel the same
I feel like I’m starting to lose my face
When you call, I’m there
When I call you’re not
My life’s in standstill
Like I’m stuck in a rut

And it all just repeats on loop
The same damn day
Said you’d call that wasn’t the truth
I hate the games you play 
And nothing is changing, my feelings grew faded
I’m not good with patience, so don’t keep my waiting
I’m out of creation, my thoughts running vacant
I’m sick of disgracing the people who made me

A state of decay
Leaves me rotting away
It’s hard to retain 
All that sense you’ll replace
What matters the most 
When I’ve been here with scorn
Your face can convey when your pushed to the wall

And it all just repeats on loop
The same damn day
Said you’d call that wasn’t the truth
I hate the games you play 
And nothing is changing my feelings grew faded
I’m not good with patience, so don’t keep my waiting
I’m out of creation, my thoughts running vacant
I’m sick of disgracing the people who made me

groundhog day w/ sinxi

prod. secre x threemvsk

my soul has been empty
and my heart, needs your love
oh God, please help me
I need you right now dont tempt me

changing up my looks and my temper
you arent here right now, whys matter
youll come back soon, and ill be better
let it all out right now, cause you miss me

change
my love its okay
its change
but youll be okay
i know life
is this way at times
keep a smile on your face girl, it looks nice

back to back
problems i cant take no more
why
this ache in my heart is coal
black
the more that i cry
im so
sad
without you next to me

pissed off for a long time i know that
i learned now my problems back then we're not 
anything too serious, i really cant lie
i wish that i could go back there, and just smile

for you x 4

back to back
problems i cant take no more
why
this ache in my heart is coal
black
the more that i cry
im so
sad
without you next to me

change
my love its okay
its change
but youll be okay
i know life
is this way at times
keep a smile on your face girl, it looks nice

pass
it'll all pass, this pain
yeah ill take it away
dont stress
my love and dont cry
ill see you soon, and youll be alright

change

something a lil sleep token/ brakencey/ sinxi/ deadfishy inspired
obviously


i hear a little whisper between silence on the phone
you say you really miss me, god i hope you really dont
the feelings shattered across somewhere, between the ash and gold
i feel a bit uncomfortable, pretend i really dont

radio silence, now nothing is active
ill hold my misfortune and judge all your actions
i find you unworthy of every practise
and sentence a life without no interaction

i hear a little breath between the distance of our call
maybe im just paranoid, can tell youre getting bored
ive been consumed by everything, the feelings getting cold
a half drunk glass of tea on the windowsil of our home

radio silence, now nothing is active
ill hold my misfortune and judge all your actions
i find you unworthy of every practise
and sentence a life without no interaction


im sure youve heard this song before in every genre
always ranting about something and nobodys bothered
i could try be clever write a double entendre
just for you to listen and not read the lyrics
or maybe i’ll produce something spend ages working on it

-------------just to be compared to every artist that you know ----------------             
                     ===================================
or maybe it’s your fault for listening to everyone and nobody at all
i guess i could be wrong
i guess ill never know
everything’s generic so im reaping what they sow

radio silence, now nothing is active
ill hold my misfortune and judge all your actions
i find you unworthy of every practise
and sentence a life without no interaction

radio silence, now nothing is active
ill hold my misfortune and judge all your actions
i find you unworthy of every practise
and sentence a life without no interaction

i hear a little breath between the distance of our call
maybe im just paranoid, can tell youre getting bored
ive been consumed by everything, the feelings getting cold
a half drunk glass of tea on the windowsil of our home

radio silence

caregiver.wav

breathe

FACEDOWN

lyrics ⬇️

when you call me
i wont pick it up
you should know this
yea you shoukd know this
and im not sorry
you shoulda noticed
i was there for you yea i swear i was closest

look how the flow switch
i know that they gon love it
thought everything was picture perfect until
you had broke it
you broke it
now i can’t even focus
not inside of my room or when im at work but im hoping

wonder when ill get outta my head out my headspace
im locked inside my skin when i scream they dont hear me
so whats the reason i should be here clearly
i shouldn’t
i know its not alright but ima keep it keep it pushing
and i dont wanna lie but i been doing what I shouldn’t 

they dont wanna see me happy but im chillin here im grinnin
i dont wanna see you they think that im crappy im a villain
maybe that is true
but i refuse to see that vision 
i dont wanna lose my hope if i dont have to

i got bad news
you wont see me no more ima be way past you

should i (hostile)

produced by heylog

lyrics:
time will tell
pick the gun up and shoot in the head (in gta)
don't worry
you don't have to get by playing pretend
tried to be nice 
but i ended up losing friends
i disappeared and don't ever wanna talk again

driving on the freeway
the same one i saw that look on your face
you told my boy it's been hard to reach me
"talking to log isn't easy"
stop tryna get me to hangout
without you i've picked up the pace now
just go ahead
select all, delete it
i'm done and i'm leaving
been a while, i wonder if you'd recognize me
always thought what we had was strong as concrete
spoke too soon and i shoulda moved on way long ago
don't know you and i can't believe we used to be close
tempted to pick the gun up and shoot him in the head (in gta)
at the time all i wanted was for you to be dead
stupid bitch, you don't wanna live life playing pretend
don't be asking for guidance or for a hand to lend
swear it felt like yesterday
i don't recognize this place
it sucks that shit's permanent
and that scar won't go away
it don't matter where you are
at your house or in your car
i'm stuck there next to your hip
your fault you took it too far

spotify

shoot

im bad for you
my love, am i bad for you?
id die, if you asked me to
without ever being mad at you
id kill for us
my love, am i bad for us ?
held down, i could pull you up
paranoid that im not enough

take what you want and leave me by the road
im always involved but im always alone
pull me from hell, pull me outta my hole
im taking it back, this delusion i stole
my familys big but nobody is home
this music means nothing cause nobody knows
theyd only downplay it and rip it to bones
i thought youd be proud of me, how would i know ?
held by my feelings and losing my hope
all that i wanted, destroyed all i know 
it feels like im chasing but being left behind
imposing this talent, its nothing of mine

texture of your skins so lovely
its nothing as rough as mine
if i cant be enough on the surface
how could i be all you like ?
i cant make decisions, dont worry
im on the fence this time
gods holding his hand out just for me
and blinded both my eyes

imposter

you fell and stained the ground beneath us 


prod/master: https://soundcloud.com/vito2300

feeling my body going numb
waiting but morning never come
i hope that god will forgive me 
oh the things that i've done
hurt somebody i needed
and somebody i loved
blood loss
my vision is starred,
hold on
i'm slowly reaching my fingers over top 
don't think there's ever been something 
that i feel like i want 

it's just the way that it goes
i know you feel like i don't 
like i don't love you at all 
i know it kills you the most
i never wanted to go 
i never wanted to stop 

i called your name a thousand times
and in my dreams i saw you die 
i saw the light fade out your eyes
and i woke alone,
and cried in case you
could hear me there
could hear me 
i screamed your name 
believe me 

(baby i wanted to stop 
got me praying to god 
love i'd do anything, i've
i've got my hand round the cross) 

i can feel the warmth 
drain out of your skin 
my shirt stole red from the cracks of your lips
i held you close and you felt so thin
i held you close like the way that you did 

i held you close
i held you close

you fell and stained the ground beneath us





groundhog day w/ sinxi

B Murph

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