shoutout to killedmyself, didn't know all those beats were up on sc

lyrics

telling me that i was just a fucking addict
guess u were right cause i could never fucking hack it
every morning, grab the palms n i just pack it
i wish sobriety was something i could manage
i wrap the blunt up nice and neat like its a package
i light it up, its in my lungs this shit is banging
i pulled up late into the scene but came in savage
burnt the blunt at both ends more than i can manage

i still remember crushing benzos on her ipad
out the back and smoking cigarettes with ur dad
i wanna know if i was ever part of ur plan
19, music dreams, yeah im all that

i hp it wsnt as bad 4 u (killedmyself)

lyrics

I just think I need a little space right now
cause every now and then I think of them somehow 
don't stay awake
just go to sleep
promise I'll be safe n sound

ur getting lost in the finer things
he risked it all on a wedding ring 
stop and wait
stop and think if it's the smartest thing
but fuck it I'm drunk rn and honestly I can't pretend
I wouldn't lay down my life just to save urs
and when I'm drunk I just say what I'm thinking more 
haunt the walls paint the floors with my brain of course
hear the call put it down I don't wanna talk

1 o'clock by the water front 
just let me know if u had enough
just let me know if I get too much
cause goodness knows that I can be a lot
lips locked up and she say she'd buy my flavour 
baby hope u know that I cannot be ur savior 
heart crossed up and I wouldn't wanna waste her
cause she seen some of my problems and she say it doesn't phaze her 

throw back to the first night
she kiss on on my lips and I get frostbite
its alright 
it's alright
drinking smirnoff straight n ur smiles so nice
I said I'm headed home
she said the fuck u are
ita 4am and a couple hundred miles from ur House
just say if there's something wrong
sit down u can sing ur sing
I said that we don't talk about the shit that we been thing bout 

I think I need a little space rn
cus every now and then I think of them somehow
don't stay awake
just go to sleep
I promise I'll be safe n sound

it's getting late in the night and it's kinda snowing 
so let me know if u figure out where u think ur going 
it's getting late in the night and it's kinda snowing
let me know where u think ur going


kinda snowing. (back2thapast x irby)

lyrics

if theres a light she gon snuff it out
if theres a heart she gon rip it out
brick walls and a mattress on the basement floor
the worst part is i bet she didnt even think at all
think to call
think to care
would u even care
u got skeletons theyre hiding underneath the stairs
she got patience for everyone but me
im just stating facts
we wasnt meant to last

if theres a light she gon snuff it out
if theres a heart she gon rip it out
and im just cold waiting for the sound
dont hmu if ur back in town

1000 miles from ur house thats up the mountains
we say our parts and the tears come like a fountain
broken hearts keep a list cus she been counting 
my head is sore could u try and keep it down
i been moving on
think im going strong
but the damage has been done
and it was fucking wrong
ay i put i on faith
u wont recognize my face
too much has fucking changed
and i dont look the same anymore

and if theres a light she gon snuff it out
if theres a heart she gon rip it out
im just cold waiting for the sound
dont hmu if ur back in town

i dont look the same anymore (pekarot)

produced by killedmyself

completely non profit 

lyrics

stary nights without the complexes
walking bout the mountains tryna fill up all our pockets
with cigarette butts 
crave a nicotine buzz
wasnt on no bud
just dumb tryna prove my love
i was feeling quite a misfit
what a bitch

ur life is over just as its begun
she found the sun inside anothers arms
and to a brother that had sworn no harm
i think ill stay inside long until the weathers calm
she got a humble cause
tearing u in half
tryna mend ur heart
she wanna leave some scars
head
whats going on in ur head babe
eyes are feeling like an xray
honestly i think im too dazed
feeling like its been 2 days
caught up in all of my blue days
that is not worthy of news page
so how r u liking my new face
ripped the skin off of my mainframe
rolled it around in an ashtray
stapled it back onto my veins

its alright
its alright
its alright
its alright

stary nights without the complexes
walking bout the mountains tryna fill up all our pockets
with cigarette butts 
crave a nicotine buzz
wasnt on no bud
just dumb tryna prove my love
i was feeling quite a misfit
what a bitch

poetry from a diary i found buried by my headstone (killedmyself)

produced by neverforever

completely non profit 

lyrics

Where u been now
Where u been
Its almost been a week now 
And i havent seen u since
I wanted us to stay friends 
But that isnt how it is
I know it gets stressful
Sticking next to me
All the stress on my mental
It stains all the sheets
So i sway to this tempo
As she falls asleep
In his arms
In their apartment
Life gets hard
But i knew that from the start 

Think i aged like 20 years in a few days
I saw the message of the gods burned in my brain
I found the fight inside my soul n now i spit flame
If anything i learned i got a cruel fate
Suns blocked so i start booting up
I break down my body i dont give a fuck
Bitch im going hard until my time is up
I need the cruelest woman to make me give a fuck

i want u to fuck me up
why is that never enough
looking at me with the eyes of an angel
i think that we're both falling out
how does this come about

she just falls asleep
in her lovers arms
when life gets hard
we fill our lungs with tar

i think i aged like 20 years in a few days
i saw the message of the gods and its burned into my brain 
if anything i got a cruel fate



-1 (neverforever)

produced by branwen

parking lot break down by hero

lights r on but no1s home by sewerperson 
- rerecorded and mixed by me

completely non profit 

lyrics:

good luck lmfao

parking lot breakdown x lights r on but no1s home ft. hero (branwen)

produced by justdan

completely non profit

lyrics:

I been knocking back a q in a week
Dart lit, walking thru the city late night with no sleep
Cold facts, I'm not sober so I'll never drive a jeep
I just took a break from posting but won't take no time to weep
I'm a go back to the start and take the time to get a hold of it
I took a year to learn before I even got to posting it
The numbers been surprising in the few months since I started this
But if u don't seek improvement then sorry son ur music's shit

Shh

I'm not fucking with the attitude
Half the scene be posting crap and hoping that they'll blow from it
U are not an artist u a hobby and it's obvious
Hit the algorithm so u always try n copy it
Copy this
Scar tissue cover up my wrist
I'm a mental patient with this music on my bucket list
People call it talent I just got tf to studying
I'd like to thank the trauma and all of the broken promises

Kill the lights they hurt my eyes
I stay inside but for tonight
I break my spine and take my life
So he grows wings and comes alive 

give a fuck if this offends u
U got bigger problems than someone who don't agree with u
I got bigger problems that someone that's in my rearview
Counting all my veins thats on my skin that's almost see thru
Heat proof
Burnt off all my nerves inside my hands like they got deep fried
I can't end my day unless I take the time to get high
I'm still caught up on some shit way back  like I'm on rewind
I ain't gonna speak on anything to do with those times
Lay down 50 hours in a week I'm making bank roll
I just killed a 13 hour shift n I smash the preroll
U don't get ahead the world gon fuck u, u gon deep-throat 
I'm meant to work in darkness why the fuck u giving me hope

Recently of late the general public just disgusts me
Go partake in drama I give permission to discuss me
Everybody fake with all the toxic positivity
It ain't about the music just about the popularity, fuck me
Truth will always rear its head, it's ugly
I am not that interested suckin off ur homies
if u got a problem with my speech well u should blow me
I'm just tryna let u know that u will never own me 

public service announcement (justdan)

prod by justdan

completely nonprofit

lyrics

walk with me 
talk with me
stay a little longer
wont u come inside?
walk with me
talk with me
ur mind begins to falter 
wont u stay the night?

surely it's safer 
inside waiting patient
for the sun to rise
these woods will get cold
frost bites at all ur toes
u should roll the dice
lets go

ignore what they told u
there's some who will guard u
u should come inside
we're getting frustrated
just break concentration
u should come inside
i promise it's safer
ur dreams i will take them
for once u'll sleep the night
and all of the feelings
that u seek escaping
I'll void them from ur life

so walk with me
talk with me
stay a little longer
walk with me
talk with me
ur mind begins to falter
wont u stay the night
surely it's safer
inside waiting patient
for the sun to rise
the woods will get cold
frost bites at all ur toes 
u should roll the dice

promise or guests never once leave complaining
im really quite alright
lets fix u some food
bits of meat diced and cubed
and get u a bed for the night
u won't feel a thing
as u drift off to sleep
don't mind the soup or its eyes

don't trust the soup (justdan)

prologue 

produced by ztope
completely non profit

lyrics

i feel the ache in my legs
im walking my way home
lights are dancing on the road tonight
while i hear a tone
i say my niceties 
i love u bye ill see u soon
i round the corner 
i see red lights shes in my view
shes right on top of the bridge
like right infront of the moon
with midnight hair 
in a black dress 
in this foggy hue
i saw the bus a fraction late
as it came speeding thru
i clip the guard n go crashing 
down into waters blue

bridge str. incident (ztope)

chapter i

produced by ztope
completely non profit

lyrics

filtered beams of moonlight 
passing thru the ice above
i cannot bear to take my eyes 
off of my drowning love
why she had to follow me
why she had to jump
shes drowning in this lake
man cold water makes u numb

makes u numb
hit my head on rocks below
blood
blood fills the water oh my god
god cannot save us
oh we're fucked
fucked
sleeping on this bed of rocks
shadows of the trees
they dance on ice thats 3, 4 inches thick
is that lantern light
i ask her body what the fuck she thinks
this our savior 
and i hope he drags us up or else we'll sink
please just save her
i do not care if im on the brink

filtered beams of moonlight 
passing thru the ice above
i cannot bear to take my eyes
off of my drowning love
why she had to follow me
why she had to jump
shes drowning in this lake
man cold water makes u numb

it makes u drown

drowning at the bottom of a frozen lake (ztope)

produced by branwen

completely non profit

lyrics

turn it up turn it up for another night
getting drunk on a sunday till the morning light
waking up in a monday in a strangers bed
i think i finished all my drinks theyre in my fuckin head

holy shit here i go again
i been off my meds for a while
n im a god again
i dont really know who i am
n im alright with it
at least im being honest
if it hurts then u dont feel regret

ur head will hurt in the morning
u dont give a fuck
shes kinda cute might as well go n try ur luck
she thought that i was 25 holy wtf
so this wont go past tonight idgaf

19 i make connections when in drunk until i break them when im sober
in my heart im older
i bleed from underneath the scotch tape thats holding me together
its forever

why waste my time writing all these fucking metaphors
im still in love with the person that i met before
gave her my heart n she threw it on the fucking floor
i find it hard just to trust cus in the end
fucked my best friend
said she wishing i was dead
u live in my head
both u n him
and its such a mess 
that u have left
that u have left
that u have left

(hero)

i find it funny how we repeat such a cycle here again
shits so toxic its obnoxious she refuse to leave my head
and im okay with that, as okay with being sliced in half
"i got a thing for artists" oh i want ur take on that
chugging octane to experience a numbness when she on me
stop me, id like to see u try oh u could never
sulfate to really rub the cut into my skin
with scotch tape to wrap the fatal wound once again

scotchtape & sulfates ft. hero (branwen)

wasn't originally gonna post this but whatever

produced by emptychest

completely non profit

lyrics

love letters
she's a real "go get her"
that momento lost forever 
guessing that u burnt my sweater
all the Polaroids she took 
are on my shelf and bound in leather
it's been almost two years 
and I'm not getting any better

hold on baby 
thought u said that ud be back now
the mountains cold 
but u don't notice when ur black out
I thought that maybe
u would like me better Rollin' up loud
but oh god
I've been drinking every night now

I used to always show up early
if I'm late i wasn't gonna come
I like to say I'm always busy
truth is I was busy lighting up 
so tell me what's the plan tonight
I think that I might stay inside
I think I'll write another line
I might just do this till I die
I spend my weekends getting high
and every morning fuck my life
but I look sober in my eyes
so everybody thinks I'm doing fine
it always seems to ease my mind
so honestly it not a waste of time
cus I've got things I try to hide
things u don't want in ur life

love letters
she's a real "go get her"
that momento lost forever
guessing that u burnt my sweater
all the Polaroids she took 
are on my shelf and bound in leather
it's been almost 2 years 
and I'm not getting any better

hold on baby 
thought u said that ud be back now
the mountains cold 
but u don't notice when ur black out
I thought that maybe, 
u would like me better Rollin' up loud
but oh god, 
i've been drinking every night now


bound in leather (emptychest)

completely non profit

produced by emptychest

lyrics

proceed with caution that's heavy
the waves will smack at the levee
I know u'll buy what I'm selling
their legs are turning to jelly
they watch as I crash the chevy
I'd tone it down if they'd let me
the loss of innocence sent me
I'll turn this up if ur ready

my loss of fortune seems petty
lined up to die like I'm kenny
with bits of wire reconnect me
ignite my fire its electric
if I'm a fox it's a fennec
I feel distress like this denim
we need to talk like I'm Kevin
this just the world that we live in
I sing a song and relive it
u a song n u cheese it
n I can hardly believe it
it's like practically breathe it
just feel the flow of the beat
n turn into a repeater 
I'll be ur coffee and creamer 
don't need no fuckin opinions

these aren't warm nights they feel like mid July
Southern hemisphere n all but still the time flies
Tryna move on, just now I feel alright
it's almost 5am and I'm still getting high
I got white ash blocking out the sky
I got double vision but I'm walking fine
this a straight shot, make a deadline 
Tryna make this bus before the before I freeze tonight

so break my heart on the seventh
and drink his spit by eleven 
she finds some peace tho in heaven
so she goes cutting the tether
just stuff my head full of feathers 
block out my will to remember
my brain will rot thru December
these drugs will turn me to Kevlar 
so watch my line for some new shit
I'm always dropping new music
it's like u need me to prove it
so pack my bowl with a two hit
just take the shot like u blew it
I like the odds when I'm losing
rammed down ur ear like a q tip
u best get used to this blue shit

u should worry bout ur damn self
it's not ur job to fix my damn health
words r nice but they all can't help
so go and waste ur time on somebody else
u just worry bout ur damn self
why u speaking on my bad health
just keep ur words all to ur damn self
go and waste ur time on anybody else

these aren't warm nights they feel like mid July
Southern hemisphere n all but still the time flies
Tryna move on, just now I feel alright
it's almost 5am and I'm still getting high
I got white ash blocking out the sky
I got double vision but I'm walking fine
this a straight shot, its a deadline 
Tryna make this bus before the before I freeze tonight

my loss of fortune seems petty
lined up to die like I'm kenny
with bits of wire reconnect me
ignite my fire its electric
if I'm a fox it's a fennec
I feel distress like this denim
we need to talk like I'm Kevin
this just the world that we live in
I sing a song and relive it
u a song n u cheese it
n I can hardly believe it
it's like practically breathe it
just feel the flow of the beat
n turn into a repeater 
I'll be ur coffee and creamer 
don't need no fuckin opinions

05:00am departure (emptychest)

produced by hero

completely non profit

lyrics

when her life is done n the credits roll on this movie screen
I was only ever credited as victim number 3
when the lights turn on n they all rush to take their leave
but I'm still here laying dead in this cinema seat
in truth I've been dead since 17
none of my feelings r free
they're kept under lock n key
no one needs to know about the pain I hold
heaven knows I've tried but I can't let this go

the lump I feel inside my chest when I'm all alone
tell me why u still the only thing that feels like fucking home
my eyes grow heavy as my heartbeat slows
I was promised death but still my soul refuse to go
oh no
just count it
take my brain n slut it out
take my drink n pour it out
take my dart n snuff it out
make me someone u won't doubt
that shit don't work I'm fucking out
what are plans they just fall out
n what r friends? just tell me now

what is love I think I've figured out
it's just a tool that she gon use for clout
she's an angel with a filthy mouth
and I'm a sinner with a Gucci pouch 
inside my pocket gotta quarter ounce
I got a smoke screen blowing out my house
so fuck me up and leave me to the hounds
I'm just a sinner with a Gucci pouch

I coughed up both lungs up on out of my chest
I've been here before so I'm not scared of my death
fell for the devil's whore n I can taste his breath
so what u try me for, when I've got nothing left?
but I have read these books
and I have read these texts
I've seen it all before
I know what happens next
I watch her lock that door
her lips run down his neck
u could've waited more
I guess that I digress 

n what is love I think I figured out
it's just a tool that she gon use for clout
she's an angel with a filthy mouth
n I'm a sinner with a Gucci pouch
inside my pocket got a quarter ounce 
I got a smoke screen blowing out my house
so fuck me up and leave me to the hounds
I'm just a sinner with a Gucci pouch


digress, i guess (hero)

produced by caves 
completely non profit

lyrics

U say he loves u like I somehow don't 
these words still hurt from out her perfect mouth
oh trust I'm happy that it all worked out

she said ur broken promise I don't mind
these conversations happen late at night
these empty bottles stack a mile high
my dart went out I think I need a light

I think our vices help us sleep alright
wrap my wounds make sure u wrap em tight
so every night I get to flying kites
Canna banner I fly this shit so high
my dart when out I think a need a light 
so she's a whore? I guess ur prolly right
still I can't change the way I feel inside
I am these broken promises and we are just alike

does it hurt that we won't talk again
she screams u lied n I said now n then
but why u acting like u innocent
I'm still choking up on all the words I thought I could of said

she said ur broken and we r just alike
these conversations happen late at night
look how u've grown look how the time will fly
my dart went out I think I need a light

we're just alike
late at night
these coversations right
they happen all the time
and from a mile high
I throw these bottles I
but still the time just flies
we're forced to say goodbye 

just alike (caves)

produced by sk8miles

completely non profit

lyrics

so who showed up to ur funeral?
(I been, I been, banking on a funeral)
only saw your family pulling up with all their caseroles 
(I been, I been, waiting on a hearse)
for every moment u spent living I sat here alone
( I don't, know why, u make me think of funerals)
but at the gruesome end I ask u where'd ur friends go
(I been, I been, banking on a funeral)

we live our lives online and wonder why we're so alone
i go outside to get reminded not to leave my home
you should lighten up and maybe then u'll find a bit of hope
you should be shutting up man I don't even care a bit at all

computer screens and actors
lights off n my back hurts
car wheels roll backwards
lives lost like captives
dying youngs in fashion
I live that gutter life no mansions
no handouts no pensions 
wear my body out for my paycheck
don't say nothing, don't spray it
I been in my head of late just brain me
take a .45 or a mil' o' 9 and send the lead out of my cranium
brain splatter on pavement
all of the grey matter just wasted
if u want something just take it
can't be assed complaining bout it

thoughts tracked on a post it
can't connect at all with humans (humans)
something broke in my brain machine
I can't talk to u without booze in me
(did u find ur halo?)
so friends come n they always leave
but that's fine tho it's alright with me
I've found the way that I'm meant to be
all alone I can finally breathe 
(did u find ur halo?)
let me breathe
bury me in mulch n rotten leaves
(did u find ur halo?)
July will mark the two years that I've grieved
why waste ur time I beg you don't believe in me
(did u find ur halo?)

so will u show up to my funeral?
(I been, I been, banking on a funeral)
only saw my family pulling up with bottled alcohol
(I been, I been, waiting on a hearse)
keep the numbers low I had no friends that they could get involved
(I don't, know why, u make me think of funerals)
shout out to my ones across the world I'll never see at all
(I been, I been, banking on a funeral)

banking on a funeral (sk8miles)

produced by autrioly

completely non profit

lyrics

i cannot, i cannot
i cannot, i cannot
i cannot, i cannot
i cannot, i cannot

i cannot do this shit
u cannot force this shit
2am high as shit
i do not drive no whips no more
i got an old friend hitting my phone
like wanna hit clubs im busy im stoned
like i get an uber from work to my home
so i can spark up light a cone and go prone
i got some demons that feed on my bones
I'm feeding on cookie I'm feeding on pros
she looking for nookie on some of the bros
nah u got a problem, u do the most

i cannot, i cannot
i cannot, i cannot
i cannot, i cannot
i cannot, i cannot

i cannot, i cannot
i cannot, i cannot
i cannot, i cannot
i cannot, i cannot

put ur weight on me
u r not perfect
what u meant to me
is coming out slurred n
u are not to be
someone that's worthless
never, not to me
baby u worth it
i was born again
covered in dirt n
found the strength to stand
blood on my shirt n
i am not the man
u thought was perfect
try to understand
I'm choking on words ma'am
turn around again
i love that skirt damn
Seamus shut ur mouth again
round and round and round my head
round and round and round again

i cannot, i cannot
i cannot, i cannot
i cannot, i cannot
i cannot, i cannot




i cannot (autrioly)

produced by autrioly 

completely non profit

lyrics

he keeps their heads in a box
under a key and a lock
her face is dripping with snot
the butcher rips us apart
he throws my bones in a pot
soups now smelling of pot
u make me laugh while I rot
choking on smell like a cock

he keeps their heads in a box
under a key and a lock
her face is dripping with snot
the butcher tears us apart
he throws my bones in a pot
soups now smelling of pot
u make me laugh while I rot
choking on smell like a cock

lately I just wanna sleep more
I been smoking weed more
I been getting blisters up on top of my hands and feet more
I just need to record
airing out these deep flaws
I just felt like moving on and I ran out of deep words

maybe I forgot that I was born for this
couldn't sell a soul that wasn't mine to give
sport a flowrs hoodie that doesn't fit
2 years I'm in UK bro we can link n shit

shoulda figured out that I'ma pessimist
I got uber eats bags stacked pyramid 
shirt n tie, uniform, yeah apron fit
even with artist block bro I cannot miss

everyone gather round yeah look at this
veins broke down again blew this bitch
bone broke plaster knuckles split
murder it yucky like I took a shit

I just saw the future I decided I don't like it
throw away the map if there's a way then I can find it
I just need somebody who can show me where the light is
I just got these images burnt inside of my eyelids

he keeps their heads in a box 
under a key and a lock
her face is dripping with snot
the butcher rips us apart
he throws my bones in a pot
the soups now smelling of pot
u make me laugh while I rot
chocking on smell like a cock



secretsauceshh (autrioly)

produced by sk8miles

completely non profit

lyrics

its not a red dress
she a different girl when she get undressed
brought a stack of flowers to the court and caused some unrest 
sunset over miles of trees and she on bed rest 
my breath fogging in the air alone n upset
train departs only once in every hour
crying at the station?
guess my tank ran out of power
I cannot pretend like I don't miss u every hour
its been a couple years, how u doin, how u now then?

life feels so wrong
I have no one
all's past all's gone
its ur mess
figure it out

ive come a long way, back from when I'd mutilate myself 
honest, was that promise that I made instead of getting help
I don't work right, uptight, awful mental health
there's a brightside, I'm fine, building up my wealth
I got his whole networth tucked beside my belt
cashing unemployment, what a way to show the world
u just wanted happiness, show me how it felt
I know that I loved u, still do, hope ur doing well

life feels so wrong
I have no one
all's past all's gone
its my mess
I'll figure it out

aeternum, semper. (sk8miles)

produced by decks

completely non profit

loveless 'til I die.

lyrics 

when I dream I see ur features
layered on the reapers
I just see ur face everywhere I go
I let her gut me like a creature
bourbon on my sneakers
only spilt my drink as she stole my soul

when I dream I see ur features
layered on the reapers
I just see ur face everywhere I go
I let her gut me like a creature
bourbon on my sneakers
only spilt my drink as she stole my soul

me and my boys we put down litres 
drinking til' our teeth hurt
we were born with addict carved in our bones
and when I dream I see ur features
layered on the reapers
I just see ur face everywhere I go

I'm a silhouette
of a tree in a storm
smoking cigarettes
got a couple thou
plan on saving it 
I been working hard
I been feeling it
n u just filling in
n I'm just mixing in
I worked 60 hours this week
n I'm still singing it
if that's not living it
then who knows what it is
work towards a future 
tho I do not plan on seeing it

when I dream I see ur features
layered on the reapers
I just see ur face everywhere I go
I let her gut me like a creature
bourbon on my sneakers
only spilt my drink as she stole my soul

me and my boys we put down litres 
drinking til' our teeth hurt
we were born with addict carved in our bones
and when I dream I see ur features
layered on the reapers
I just see ur face everywhere I go


layered (decks)

produced by sofabed

completely non profit

lyrics

u and i need to find a way 
to exist separately 
but I cannot, I will not
I won't believe
u and i, u and i
weren't meant to be
no I will not, I will not 
I won't believe

(are u on or off?)

what are u waiting for?
is it last call?
I hope there's more to ur life than this
than there is to mine

(are u on or off?)

last call (sofabed)

produced by neverforever

cty_gazing_ inspired by city gazing by hero

completely non profit 

lyrics

rain clouds above me
my souls fuckin ugly
everyone act so roughly
not like we playing rugby

so c'mon
u get a free throw
i'ma break ur ribs with my feet tho
u can keep those
knocking out some teeth like t bone
12 zero

switch just flipped 
so I drink and drink and drink
Molly got boys fucked 
why do I not feel a thing
sitting in a gutter 
feels like where I'm meant to be
lemme take a second 
i just need some time to think

sunrise
that's home time
well past dawn when I close eyes
my surprise 
pretty sure that i hate going outside
like oh my i can be a hypocrite ik
dont we all sometimes 
like don't lie
u don't see the grey sky

that's all i see
in u and me

all the bad all the hurt
i guess i just see the worst
fuck urself
fuck the world 
save it? nah it don't deserve
i been burnt
i have learnt
good intentions same as dirt
i been burnt
i have learnt
good intentions same as -

rain clouds above me
my souls fuckin ugly
everyone act so roughly
not like we playing rugby

fuck like
i really woke up?
fall asleep face up i wanna choke up
fully gave up
yeah
zoning out this bitch while smoking with the raindrops

this ain't life i'm stuck in my own self made hell
hate the world almost half i do myself
i just suck but u should know i'm something else
self aware i take the devil's side in hell

cough up sludge I force it back into my gut
taste just fine it's like a stronger form of bud
bought an h and in a week I'm out of bud
sleeves r stained, recycler bong that's full of muck

this_ program_ has_ been_ interrupted_ due_ to_ its_ upsetting_ ERROR_ irrelivent_ nature_
a_ replacement_ of_ a_ more_ entertaining_ nature_ has_ been_ selected_

well it gets lonely 
city gazing from the satellites
all alone here 
in this spaceship and the latern light 
well ive got oxygen 
enough to maybe make the night
but ive accepted that this place 
is where I'll come to die

the view ive got from in my coffin
well it's really nice
if I jumped what'd be the chance 
I'd land in powerlines
a mangled body's not the image 
that I'd hope ud find
a lump of coal that u can bury 
is worth the piece of mind

maybe best to turn this ship 
and gun for saturn's rings
I'd meet an alien 
and tell him how I really think
this world is ugly 
if u took the time to sink it in
people selfish and absorbed 
inside of useless shit

ive got a problem
ive forgotten how to let u in
my vision fades 
alarms are blaring, I hit jettison 
a fire show ignites
somewhere above the midnight sky
I hear just silence
void is pretty fond of eating life

city gazing, with my homies:
foreign parasites 
a formed allience 
between the dead and all this moldy life
I pull the plug on sos
command don't give a shite
I found ignition in the pain
that came from u and I

dmg_ctrl_/cty_gazing_ (neverforever)

this is not a british accent fuck u

produced by yungspoiler and daks9k

originally performed by 9tails

completely non profit

lyrics:

talking up just to talk backwards
actor
i remember when the enemies where not a factor
gotta move different cus of outbursts of my temper
i might be an asshole but the truths what matters
splatter
all my deep down thoughts get shattered
on my new reboks plant matter
and it coned out raw
smoke that spliff then wrote this song

holding in smoke face
blue man group 
loud way too loud
man it smell like poop
but enough about me
tell me more about you
did your friend text back?
did u link that dude?

treat him like a main or a strong number 2
u about to break with the weight on u
put the faith in him but he always falls thru
lately i just hope that im not that dude
u aint really done nothing bad say u (say who?)
i been getting pew pewed every other song
drop
drop bombs and support gonna cease i guess
profit increase so does everybody's needs i guess
vampires when i bleed i guess
when i fuck off now u fuck me i guess
smoke my weed then kiss ur teeth whats next

im sorry friend
could we make amends? 
its the second call 
but ima call again
im on a variety of shit
its only 2pm
bottles concious n spliff
all beside me n the whip

i want decemeber 
there wasnt as many plans
that i felt bad for missing
to really see what i can
do with these hands
do with this brain 
and the subject matter inside
u leave im working
im eager
something i could never hide
something i could never hide
no
no

i get too deep in it
mind overdrive
my thoughts override
as fear overrides my shit
coarse cough got me fucked up
with the blood spit
yuck

some_ missed_ calls_ (yungspoiler x daks9k)

chapter ii

produced by ztope
completely non profit

lyrics 

dragged by our feet
through the snow
the watchman saved our lives
and welcomed to his home
he has advice to give
he thought you needed some
this is no way to live
what have we become

the watchman lives to keep his lantern lit
he smells of edelwood and cigarettes
inside the forest you won't meet your death
beware the beast
this innocence is on his breath

he said they will turn on us
and we will burn to dust
we will get lost inside the forest
either one of us
so are you scared of us
cus we were left to rust
u think you care that much
this is what's left of us

don't let your mind disconnect 
from the world that you been living in
no I'm alright in the forest 
I'm at peace with all the denizens 
so keep your eyes on the track 
tho I know they feel like wandering
no I'm alright: it's an act
you just can't let doubt start setting in
several souls I know
well they left years ago
they took the lonely road
and they got lost in hope
so I'm a lonely rope
she left a lonely note
this is our only home
you're all I have to hold

decks

well I was born in blood and guts but who was counting
spoilt what I thought was mine to drown in
hold ur breath for as long as it's allowing 
the last of us are here for u
but now's it's go
go sleep in the snow
wake up to visions I'll never remember
I know now
where do we go
sickened and feeling ur losing ur tether 
it's part of the path that we take
born into hate and decay
everyone here is the same
look at the mess that we made

several souls I know
well they were once my home
they found a new one tho
and they got lost in the snow
so im your only hope
it's hard to let them go
I wish I'd never known
but now on forced to cope

betweentheveinsandi 

he said they would turn on us
and we would burn to dust
we will get lost inside the forest
either one of us
so are u scared of us?
cus we were left to rust?
u think u care that much.
this is what's left of us.


left of us ft. decks (ztope)

originally performed by sewerperson
produced by ztope
completely non profit

lyrics

she gets high 
every other night
and just cries
girl I'll be with u tonight
im en route
im near the drop off

every day I fuse into one this month
i can't keep control if the speed too much
triple up my fluid on my last good night
i can't even see my fingers front my face in these lights

everything's different than it had been before
unroll my backwoods and break my meteors
friends like this family I never knew before
life on this planet ain't felt this new before 

get by
she gets high
every other night
and just cries
girl I'll be with u tonight
im en route yeah
im around the block
yeah im near the drop off
really got me locked down
im ten down yeah
i cannot stand for this shame
im to proud
im locked up so I kick the door down
locked down
she really got me locked down
guess she know me too well

im bleeding im falling 
im tearing apart
past the andromeda 
im in the stars
one u look down 
on the earth from this far
u can see just how small 
of a person u are

u could stay girl it's cold, 
can u see the lightning?
i just talk then I leave
im not tryna slide in
i distract then I bleed
if she got me hitting
don't get me wrong
we all human
but in uninviting

tell me if I take too long
i just wanna turn u on
turn u on
rip thru the phone book
she grip me by the heart
plenty left me broken
but the way u do it
turns me on
why's this summer so long



locked_ down_ x turn_ u_ on_ (ztope)

originally performed by sewerperson
produced by mags
completely non profit

k_ (mags)

produced by sk8miles
completely non profit
lyrics:

shawty hit me with that vac seal
no gorilla grip
she go on to talk dick sand 
and how im pussy whipped 
glad u can agree that u and i
are a perfect fit 
if we talk about the premise, 
u and i, i guess we're caving in 

caving in 
seems that all i do is fuel some version of the pain im in
glad u getting me n what i've learnt from eating pavement
said the monster looking back on everything he did
i need my medicine 

my feet lost the ground 
i am still not found
I'ma hack at this ounce
blow smoke down and make clouds 
my feet lost the ground
i am still not found
I'ma hack at this ounce 
blow smoke down and make clouds 

so we dress up
and we pub crawl
eatin on her ___
'til i get lockjaw
u gotta love me for the way i am
swear the more the that she could hurt me;
only make me more attached 
blowing smoke into a fan
while she's sleeping in my bed around like 2am
i just crack my beer n touch the cieling crush n toss the can 
lucky im all out of barz cus knowing me id take the chance bro

my bad, love u
that's a lot of vodka for someone 5 foot
hard world. pull thru.
no one gives a fuck and that's a hard truth
but you make me feel alright
better at least than most nights 
it's complex the state of my mind
but she just says to shut up 
and get the knife
 

good point, but i have a knife (sk8miles)

produced by lil nightshift
feature by the homie decks
this ones just for us
completely non profit

lyrics

mouldy cups in my room
rotten bags full of food
i got tar n muck n my shoes
top it off with bad attitude

mouldy cups in my room
rotten bags full of food
i got tar n muck n my shoes
top it off with bad attitude

there's a store that shuts in my head at noon
if u had a point better make it soon
deprived of shut eye I'm craving snooze
online it's highlights and pay per view
this scene is dead but I'll make it thru
when i carve a pathway of naked truths
consistent drops will always grow a project
consistently will top whatever drops next

up next.

uber eats bro i fw ramen
rolled up 50s, baggies, palm it
came to play, boi I'm fuckin starving 
piece of cake, watch me bite this tarmac 
here's to a year of me still complaining
bunkered down in my mental basement 
fuck the labels and fuck the placements
here's to sinners, get fucking brain dead

mouldy cups in my room
rotten bags full of food
i got tar n much in my shoes
top it of with bad attitude 

mouldy cups in my room
rotten bags full of food 
i got tar n muck in my shoes
top it of with bad attitude

decks

let it fuckin build, what have i got to lose
i been fuckin braindead since '22
& if u watch me implode its pay per view
my own mental state will make money too

i been grinding for years & it wont stick
nothing i do's worth a damn to the public
i do this for me till my deathbed
what the fuck does it matter when its all corrupt
& the money i've spent's an investment
don't think i dont know what i have accomplished
i could do this from my basement
but veins and i aiming for bigger, just trust that.

where my face hit dirt ft. decks (lil nightshift)

produced by neverforever
completely non profit
lyrics

i saw u in his letterman
so how could we be friends again
im tryna be the better man
but u told me i just pretend
to stick my head in ceiling fans
im neck deep in ur problems man 
so close ur eyes and count to ten
and try to sync our breaths again 
that puppy love in mountain air
who knew id find such damage there
these tiny things have venom
and they hide their fangs behind the hair
most people like to think they care
to say so's far from self aware
so i just chose to lock myself away and find some solice there

im hoping that u find something of worth while ur trapped under there
my girl chilling in a button up, she got no underwear
she just get this look all on her face when i get up in there
soon i smoke my doob she kiss my face and drag me out the chair  

gram inside my bowl im tryna send it for i go to work
parting up the sea of people, walk around my city turnt 
carving up this green, im evil, outfit gotta be a serve 
darling i need sleep but tearfully theres bread i gotta earn

rain
on the metal lace
soldiers lose their mind and take their swords up till the grave 
pain
running through my face
i will never falter
already went insane
shame
it all feels the same
if this is the path im on
ill take it to the grave
brain
all i needs my brain
trust i'll work it out
and put my movements into play

im hoping that u find something of worth while ur trapped under there
my girl chilling in a button up, she got no underwear
she just get this look all on her face when i get up in there
soon i my smoke doob she kiss my face and drag me out the chair  

take her out to dinner said let's just pretend theres strings attached 
oh i know i flex a little, u know soundcloud paid for that
im not tryna buy ur love, the good life what im aiming at
im just tryna crawl out of the mud and pay the world back

i just got this anger burnt inside me since when i was a kid
i cant help but blame my father, curse left generations dead
i cant even tell u not at all theres nought i wouldn't give
i just think that i could use a brain that doesnt hate to live

(alan watts sample) 

the path to dirtmouth (neverforever)

produced by imalmostjoey
completely non profit

lyrics

u gotta listen
i got an ear for the music
i got some thoughts for u to listen to 
cus lately im winning
like half the lyrics are stupid
u aint got shit that u proving
least when i run my mouth 
i ditch the couch and get up n prove it

honestly 
when did everything become so damn trife
watchin me
why does every body think theyre damn right
totally
to say this is a skill is fucking toxic? right..
totally
insulting to the ones who live this damn life

thats how i know u aint about it like i am
i know a lot of fuckin artists who are honestly just fans
it aint about what u accomplish but the texture of ur hands
cus if u had a spine at all u'd plant ur feet n take a damn stand

damn tramp
u aint ever caught a damn hand
trust a good knock to ur head will shake ur brain n all that damp sand 
wam bam
love to see ur back bend
how u getting pressed about a fight u fuckin started man
shady plans 
why u throwin shade out on ur twitter fam
make amends
never gonna happen if u play pretend
i just had to say my piece 
oh who knows if it was a waste of breath 
its sad i hit the scene nd had to ask 
like where the music at

honestly 
when did everything become so damn trife
watchin me
why does every body think theyre damn right
totally
to say this is a skill is fucking toxic? right..
totally
insulting to the ones who live this damn lie

nevermind

sleep talking (imalmostjoey)

produced by ztope and killedmyself
completely non profit

lyrics

ice and mud is giving way
its a waterslide

auburn hair out in the fields
i miss summer time
the ice and mud is giving way
its a water slide
both my feet are swept away
guess its do or die
i just hope she feels the same
hope its u and i 

i guess these circumstances arent exactly normal, i can give u that
faint roads, the pain grows, always clawing at the scabs 
i play a song from my memory
something inside me still struggling
somehow i grip on the muddy reeds
nothing could take it away from me

i found shelter all alone
on a shore in freezing clothes
20 miles barefoot snow

auburn hair out in the fields
i miss summer time
the ice and mud is giving way
its a water slide
both my feet are swept away
guess its do or die
i just hope she feels the same
hope its u and i 

auburn hair out in the fields
i miss summer time

swept away (ztope x killedmyself)

no capital letters

prod by caves
completely non profit

lyrics

her brown eyes are warm
n my tired face is worn
my shaky hands are torn
but her brown eyes are warm 

its a quarter past 1 and im high us fuck
im just thinking bout the weekend when my darling comes 
i gotta breathe, let out hatred in black sludge
now its april and im wondering, the fuck is up?
shawty i think im in need of new bed springs
(i need new bed springs) 
voddy n cran rip a bowl n get headspins 
(you bring better things)
ill take the train if u want we should lock in
(lets go, lets lock in)
winter weather just feel like wisconsin 
(wont fold, im all in)

winter weather just feel like wisconsin 
ill take the train if u want we should lock in
winter weather just feel like wisconsin
shawty i think im in need of new bed springs

catching trains again
trekking through the mountain air
this time through the south instead
from her eyes i wipe the hair
double down and vault the stairs
ill be there when no one cares
light my stoag and ponder there
out back with my vacant stare

its a quarter past 1 and im high as fuck
(i need new bed springs)
im just waiting for the weekend when my darling comes
(u bring better things ) (with my vacant stare)
i gotta breathe let the hatred out in black sludge
(lets go, lets lock in)
now its april and im wondering the fuck is up
(wont fold, im all in)
shawty i think im in need of new bed springs 
(ill be there when no ones cares)

im all in

wisconsin (caves)

originally performed by bedside kites
unmixed
one take

stuffed up a line or two but who cares

a sad song about a girl i no longer know

(mostly) songs i wrote about a girl i no longer know

betweentheveinsandi

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