prod deadfish <3

socials:
https://www.instagram.com/deadfishig

lyrics:

I need therapy
I am going numb
could you look at me
and maybe dm me from time to time

I don't think I'll be okay
I think it's needless to say
that I need someone to stay
is it bad that I'm afraid

I never wanted
to end up like that
alone and aching 
with no one to talk about stuff
that troubles me and I can't
deal it with on my own
I've been to therapy
didn't listen now I'm at the start

I never wanted to feel like a burden oh no
so sick of hearing that I'm better off dead
Don't need your pity, no
I Don't want any meds
I know I'm god damn numb
but pills just won't help

I need therapy
I am going numb
could you look at me
and maybe dm me from time to time

I don't think I'll be okay
I think it's needless to say
that I need someone to stay
is it bad that I'm afraid
x2

Afraid

spotify:
https://open.spotify.com/track/4fv8YRo7BYXrjDWAf5QSAy?si=ca7163aff2b04300

artists:
https://soundcloud.com/onlyfriendyeah
https://soundcloud.com/lilskeleskrrt

prod. joe tedesco

lyrics:
it's unbearable
just got back from the bar an i'm f*cking miserable
cold and sober in the dark

my mind keeps racing
i grieve in stages
and i can't change how
ur sleeping fine in someone else's bed
head on someone else's chest
i can't bear to know the rest
so let me rest
in pieces

i'm just tryna rest in peace so well
i don't rly need ur f*ckin help
so just stop callin me
i'm just tryna kick it in hell

sayin that u love me idk if u mean that
keep lookin at the photos i should prolly delete that
you never really loved me i dunno why you said that
must've been easy broke my heart over snapchat
it's almost funny how u act so fine
post a couple pictures of his bed online

my mind keep racing
i break in stages
you don't even care of the timing
take a couple shots as i scroll thru ur ig

my mind keeps racing
i grieve in stages
and i can't change how
ur sleeping fine in someone else's bed
head on someone else's chest
i can't bear to know the rest
so let me rest

my mind keeps racing
i grieve in stages
and i can't change how
ur sleeping fine in someone else's bed
head on someone else's chest
i can't bear to know the rest
so let me rest

onlyfriend - let me rest (ft. skele) [prod. joe tedesco]

this time it won't fix

https://soundcloud.com/heylog
https://soundcloud.com/imcaves
https://soundcloud.com/irby314

you made me feel nauseous 
i keep getting sick
can't remember where it started 
can't forget all that you did to me
you tasted so bittersweet 
i still see you every time i sleep
i gave you every part of me 
i bet you couldn't tell
i fall in love with narcissists,
don't care about myself
i just go through sedatives
keep fucking up my health 
what's the point of heaven,
i already live in hell

it's not easier 
i'll lie and say it is 
i gave up on getting better 
it's just the way it is
i've been feeling numb ever since i was a kid 
i don't wanna die,
but i don't wanna try and live

i said that i loved you 
(save me)
i gave you the blood from my skin
i tried everything
admit it
it's hard but i did it
you left me too damaged 
this time it won't fix

[heylog]
i'm calling for you 
are you with someone else
the pics on my phone
are nowhere to be found 
would it surprise you 
if i took myself
i might just die here
when no ones around
but i made a choice 
that i regret 
stomp out the house
from what i said
and now it's too late to apologize
fumbled my words,
i guess this is goodbye 

i wish i did better 
thinking all the time 
baby it's whatever
see you in the next life
i'm trying to forget her 
but god it feels impossible
now she's just a number 
floating in my phone
i wish i did better 
thinking all the time 
i don't make any sense
and it makes me wanna cry 
but i look like im stupid
and she say that it's fine 
girl you're pretty funny 
tell another lie

it's not getting easier (w/ heylog) (prod. caves & irby)

produced by jpjp
vocals + lyrics by heylog & i'm geist

lyrics:
your caught around my throat
i don't think you wanna know what i know
you remember we were close
now i don't call you a bro anymore
watch out i might contain hostility
you say u know but you don't know me
i guess i'm used to it
people that i know always abusing it

i'd kill the old me
a lot has changed so i'd do it in a heart beat
through the veins, through my skin
subtle scarring
what was left in the past
know it hardly
i had a job and i failed to kill the old me
a lot has changed so i'd do it in a heart beat
through the veins, through my skin
subtle scarring
what was left in the past
know it hardly
i had a job and i failed to kill the old me

so long, won’t accept my defeat
i know i’m running out of time
but i can’t even breathe

lost cause, threw me into the sea
it’s not what i wanted to be
they prayed i drowned in the deep

but i’m holding on
there’s so much left inside of my head that i’m fighting for
what went wrong?
cause i seem to have lost myself amongst the dying stars

what went wrong?
cause i seem to have lost myself amongst the dying stars
what went wrong?
i seem to have lost myself amongst the dying stars

i'd kill the old me
a lot has changed so i'd do it in a heart beat
through the veins, through my skin
subtle scarring
what was left in the past
know it hardly
i had a job and i failed to kill the old me
a lot has changed so i'd do it in a heart beat
through the veins, through my skin
subtle scarring
what was left in the past
know it hardly
i had a job and i failed to kill the old me

through my veins, through my skin

SPOTIFY

heylog & i'm geist - through the veins, through my skin (jpjp)

IG : @maybehinshi & @sewerperson

lyrics : 

I itch all night until I get my fix
Plenty people die but not everybody lives

Cuddled up in worried silence
The night above bathes is in violet
Where were u to grant me guidance
With no one here I’m walking blinded
My knuckles bleed and my cheeks burn red
The blood drips down while I Bandage my head
I knew enough but its just so fun to guess
This consequence embeds in my chest
Her heaven just feels like a prison to me
But prisoner then I will be
And I happily comply when she asks it of me
Cause that’s what she loves most
Poison thru the door is replacing my feed
For once just ask me what I would want and ill tell u its love to receive from you
Love to receive from you

And I would die tomorrow if u promised me it could save ur life
Wipe all that sorrow off of ur face im here to hold u tight

And I'll scream all night
Till you hear me right
Our hearts ignites
Things we can't rewrite
I'll waste my time
Till it all rewind
I'll waste my time
Till it all comes back

As time pass, I give up on our love (our love)
And I can't get your face out off (my head)
And I'm wondering if you ever loved me
I'm sinking, you're all that I need

And I'll scream all night
Till you hear me right
Our hearts ignites
Things we can't rewrite
I'll waste my time
Till it all rewind
I'll waste my time
Till it all comes back

love from you (feat. Sewerperson)

prod. @noahmadethiss

lyrics
--------
homebound
you are not alone now
i was on the telephone calling you
wishing i didn't fold now
soulbound
you & i are soulbound
i just wanna be the light beside you & lead the path to your home now
homebound
you are not alone now
i'll be right beside you till the end
and i promise i'll never fold now
sold out
they said that i sold out
all cause i've been writing bout my problems
and made it outta my hometown

trust me i'm trying my hardest
regardless i hope that you're fine
wish i saw the signs
like i could've saved you
if only i knew of the trouble you'd find
oh why was your fate in the hands of me
i think bout it all of the time
and with that in mind i wish i could fall backwards in time
wrote this callback while you were alive

so
reckless
cemetery deathwish
sittin' at your grave with a blunt & a bottle up to my chest
this chexmix doesn't taste the best
it's stale like the ale in my pail and i'm paler than my ex bitch
senseless
write it off my checklist
checkered board shorts & i'm sure that the shore is to the left
it's right there
nothings ever right there
mirrors give me light scares
i'm my own worst nightmare
i'm my own worst nightmare

follow noahmadethiss

homebound (prod. noahmadethiss)

prod. ocin
guitars: yhello

Come catch a feeling while we’re watching a lightning 
But nothing excites me, baby I try to hide it 
I think about you, let’s make love on the highway 
Can we get inside babe 
You know time won’t stop flying 

You know me I 
Could never stop 
I’ll do it or die 
Can’t lose you and cry 
The pain in our back 
It hurts 
Now we’re laughing it off 
Now we’re laughing it off, oh 
The pain in our back 
It hurts 
Now we’re laughing it off 
We keep laughing it off, ya 

Kill time when we're driving 
It's both of us finding 
A reason to separate 
Your past is behind me 
I don't open up 
Don't wanna be judged 
Don't wanna be looked at 
I blame my gut 

I love you and you know that 
Even if you don't love me back 
I pray at night to hope you're well 
And pray again for my own self 
If I had a wish and that would be to see you laugh 
Cause I guarantee that you'll receive a smile back 
Now we both sitting there just laughing it off 
I want you to know that you were all I got 

You know me I 
Could never stop 
I’ll do it or die 
Can’t lose you and cry 
The pain in our back 
It hurts 
Now we’re laughing it off 
Now we’re laughing it off, oh

laugh it off (ft. heylog)

lyrics
--------
remember when they said we wouldn’t strive
but we wrote it out and cracked the fucking code
remember when we lost our fucking minds
so sedated shit but now we on the road

the flowers out back if you wanna catch a glimpse
come thru to the crib you can see just how i grow
seltzer habit i’m a caffeine addict
two matches strike the pack so you can see the ember glow
full screen this one you gon wanna see the wrist
cause i’ve been icy in this bitch and it’s just me and all my bros
flow so clean i’ve been rolling in the deep
with a dell and a yeti maybe i should take it slow

wait
this the part that i haven’t yet made
ugh i hate when i’m alone in this place
my mind isn’t made up about today
but so far this weeks looking fucking great

monday we was in a gorgeous place
yeah tuesday we hit traffic in LA
uhh wednesday took another trip to the bay
yeah thursday drove for like 12 hours straight
ugh friday we was up in rose city
saturday just passed yeah it’s 1:43
now it’s sunday praying for another way
all i’m thinking bout in the van is your god damn face

i can’t hold back
you should know that
i shoulda never really hit you with that call back
i shoulda really thought about it before all that
now im alone in my room and it’s pitch black
pitch black
where my bitch at
i just got another on the way that shit is kick ass
i just made another dumb mistake and i cant list that
i’ll just kick it solo in my home let’s skip the chit chat

fuck this party
i ain’t leaving sorry
things aren’t looking great
and i
wish that i wasn’t 2,000 miles away
but let’s be honest
this is what you wanted
what can i say
lately i’ve been numbing all the pain when i step up on the stage

ember ft. eric godlow (prod. sorrow bringer)

so much fun!

produced by heylog
main guitar played by SADisfying

lyrics:
if i cant love
will i end up
lone and forgot
or spend it with someone
i cant fall in love
my hearts dead probably numb
i hope it wont be long
to heal cus its been months
if i cant love
will she leave us?
alone here in the dust
ill never get enough
my time is up
i cant think with all the fuss
these camels takin my lungs
i think of u when im buzzed

i wish youd stay home permanently
i cant sleep alone if ur in my dreams
i cant let u go this cant be happening
but ur bad for me
but ur bad for me
i still love u even if u hate me
i still want u even if u despite me
i still care for u even if u dont care for me
u were good to me
u were great for me

i never understood 
how u could put up with me
cause i barely showed love 
im still surprised u didnt leave me
now as i look back
i shouldve cherished what i had with you
call me "heyregret" 
thats how i feel with everything
i havent touched food all day
too busy making music 
she asked me if im aokay
"i listen to ur lyrics"
i dont know how to love
i show zero emotion
only in my songs
my tears could flood the ocean

if i cant love
will i end up
lone and forgot
or spend it with someone
i cant fall in love
my hearts dead probably numb
i hope it wont be long
to heal cus its been months
if i cant love
will she leave us?
alone here in the dust
ill never get enough
my time is up
i cant think with all the fuss
these camels taking my lungs
i think of u when im buzzed

spotify

months

prod by me again love u guys <33

lyrics:

maybe its the way that I been feelin lately
I keep trippin on your laces its so complicating 
suffocated by your breathe
while you’re sleeping
tell me is it me or is it everything this weekend

so its me and you 
in this polaroid burnin 
I cant seem to tell the truth
its so hard when im with you
burnin pictures in my wallet you can see it right 
its the only way im ever gonna sleep at night

fk it tho, it’s okay im gettin my money up
I know you dont believe me but I give a fk
if I fall, imma end it all
im tired of these fights endin in draws

I get so fkin stressed that I cant calm down
and all my friends are busy and they gone now
I cant help but feel alone cus I dont go out 
im so stuck in my head I cant get out 

I say I love you and I mean it, I know you dont believe it
all the shit that I been feelin I wish I wasnt breathin 
I seen it cant believe that im not dreamin 
I always close my eyes cause I cant look I’ll jus be terrified 

terrified, of my visions, im so terrified
look me in my eyes, cant u see this fkin parasite
parasite, eatin at me killin me inside
I cant fall asleep and I cant get up I put my life aside

polaroid

A INDEPENDENT CURATOR, LABEL & PROMOTER, ASSISTING IN THE GROWTH OF SELECTED ARTISTS.

onlyfriend - let me rest (ft. skele) [prod. joe tedesco]

biteki