art by: yoruseh (ig)

My mind is losing this war
I cant control how I feel
Is when I see her in his arms x2

All I remember of her
Turns into bad memories
When I saw her at her boyfriends house
When she was in her boyfriends house

All this despair is killing me
I hate that my brain doesnt work
Im really trying to hate her
I really need to hate her

I cant take this pain anymore
I really need medicine
Maybe a rope around my neck
Maybe a bullet in my head

Need

manifesto

why do you have to fuck with me?
you bring stuff up until we cant speak
this tensions making it hard to breath
i miss back when you just acted sweet 

like when you would show me all your songs
and conversations with my mom
and why is everything so hard?
now I just think about you and sob

i don’t think that you care at all
but id still pick up if you still called 
i know that sometimes we’ll disagree
but I just want you to be nice to me

like when you would show me all your songs
and conversations with my mom
and why is everything so hard?
now I just think about you and sob

sensitive young man

spotify: https://tinyurl.com/sitinmisery

today i'm fucking breaking out
i'm getting out of here
i can't stand the sound
my audio ain't clear

my audio is fucked
i need a new pair
of fucking headphones
cause i can't hear shit

i can't hear shit
the shit they say 'bout me
i just wanna die
sit in misery

sit in misery

die alone

Oh god, my mom
Just gave me a weed sticker
To put onto my guitar
Rarely ever smoking weed
But still I stuck it in on
Cause the stickers I put on there
Have a story or a yarn

Someone that I once knew gave me a sticker of a star
She told me I should stick it on the back of my lanyard
It looked a little lame but I did it anyway
And every time my friends asked I had to explain

Any hint of sentimentality I hold onto
The little things that I hold dear if it has any value
And when I have any single experience I have to write songs

Fuck, what's wrong?
I know there's something
That I just can't put my finger on
Oh, what's wrong with me?
Tell me, please
Rip off a sticker
For it just reminds me

I need to sleep
But hundreds of these memories
Keep playing on repeat
Of things I could've done
Or changed or handled differently
And it's looming like a spectre
Constantly reminding me

That everything is volatile and soon one day will leave
Told me she enjoyed the night, and now we never speak
Never had merit, for all a sticker is
Is a piece of fucking paper with nothing else to it

Idle hands make one want to take
A gun and place it in their face
A bird in the hand will make one break
It's fucking neck and throw it away

When your life's plans
Are just handed to you
With no circumstance
All the little happenings
Mean so much more
Than you would think
And I know that the roots
One day outgrow
And if I was there
You would too

Oh, what's wrong with me?
Tell me, please
Rip off a sticker
For it just reminds me

self trepanation videos

Crustsox - Merit Dot

its happening again
haven't heard much from my friends
guess i really hoped that they'd check in
made a hole in my head
that lets smoke right on in

i've been like this before
but last time it didn't hurt as much
i'd be lying if i said that
i cope well with change and
life's changing too much
and i wanna go back

i wish i knew what i had as a kid

when i was fucked up
watching videos from before my time
in shitty quality of people's lives
and their friends all documented
through a low view count and nokia lens

you can see their phases
that they'd grow out of
and a joy they'd grow out of too
the kids complaining
about their problems
before real problems were issued

capturing moments
they've probably forgotten by now
you don't know what you got, but you shall
when you're old as fuck and you'll deal with it

pinboards and photographs
won't fill the void in any capacity
you want a better life
well you can't and won't and i know that's shitty
cheap whores and cigarettes
you wanna live as full and best
as possible, it's not possible
you're a pleasure seeker,
you're an animal

i wish i knew what i had as a kid
because just maybe then i'd have lived when i lived
i once had full control, spiral out
it's too late now
no i can't take the fucking scenic route

Crustsox - self trepanation videos

Crustsox - Again?

waiting on this life to pass me by
without you here id rather die
im not having fun
but im not mad
i just fucked up all i could ever have

so ill write songs about how drinkings
the only thing that’ll stop me from thinking
how I need you, I need you bad
then i wouldnt be so fucking sad

i know im a loser, but could you still love me?
i know im an asshole i hope that you’ll still like me
i know im a faggot but please dont leave me baby
i know im a loser, but could you still love me 

i cant sleep
i cant eat
i lay awake with you next to me
got nothing to say 
nothing i wanna do 
nothing left for me to impress you

everyones the same
everythings a blur
i try to break out but i just get fucking hurt
i dont wanna live
i dont wanna work
just wanna be with you under the dirt

loser

xo_willow cover
prod heelflip.
thank you bro

Crustsox - self trepanation videos

ONCEBITTEN

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