God I Love This Chord

This piece was written as part of a dance collaboration with choreographer Jillian Kramschuster in spring 2022. Jillian and I discussed our fascination with complex emotions, especially those that deal with personal connections and how our social circles shift over time. Somewhere between anticipatory grief and a longing for new friends; a curiosity and a fear of the future--the emotion is better felt than described, so we made it into art.

For Lack Of A Better Word (2022)

Performance of my micro-opera BECOMING, from No Divide KC's Come As You Are event with the Lyric Opera of Kansas City on June 3, 2023.
Jennifer Weiman, mezzo-soprano
Evan J. Nelson, baritone
Neal Long, piano

Program Note:
To describe my experience living with a degenerative muscle disease, I often use the metaphor of “an intimate relationship with decay.” I feel this describes the emotional complexity and depth, as well as the honesty and compassion I must exercise with my body as it changes. BECOMING actualizes this relationship between the self and decay, portrayed as a conversation between two close friends, Aspen and Aurelius. Together, they discuss intricate truths of life—the simultaneity of growth and deterioration, the constancy of decay amidst change, cyclicality—and draw connections between life and artistic processes to assist in digesting the nature of existence.

BECOMING (2023) LIVE 6-3-23, piano-vocal version

feast mode activated when i see an unsupervised child fr

Beach Strollin - Rando Land

lyrics:
Your tongue coats your teeth with lies
Tall man, tall tales, tired eyes

I know I'm not hot enough to date but you'll validate me for now and I'll take it
You didn't care enough to wait a sec and contemplate on what the fuck's at stake, but I'll fake it

Your tongue coats your teeth with lies
Tall man, tall tales, tired eyes

Now I know exactly what you're asking:
How the fuck would you find something lasting
that was just as good or better later on?
But it's too much so can you wait?
Cuz I'm like this close to another breakdown
For something unrelated, leaves are fallin, suffocate

Your tongue coats your teeth with lies
Tall man, tall tales, tired eyes
I was your victim to defile
Don't want your noblesse oblige

sorry for overdoing it again

Your tongue coats your teeth with lies
White smoke and fluorescent lights
Was your victim to defile
Now I'm incandescent

Had to know what you're disguised in the shape of
We were chillin' in the ride with Brakence on
You chose to fight or fly but you can't hide from what's not lookin' for you

Meeting you was such a fuckin waste I know that
Parry - riposte like I'm Race Imboden
Now I'm on the piste and you're marked by the beast
I wasn't on the fuckin fence until you left me on seen

Your tongue coats your teeth with lies
Tall man, tall tales, tired eyes
To you this was somethin slight
Don't need your noblesse oblige
-----------------------
Now I know exactly what you're asking:
How the fuck would you find something lasting
that was just as good or better later on?
But it's too much so can you wait?
Cuz I'm like this close to another breakdown
For something unrelated, leaves are fallin, stomach pain

AND I THINK IT'S TIME YOU HAD A
Gray cloud Autumn, you overdosed on placebo pills
I think I'm glad no one became your problem

Falling

blinknullmiss

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