DESIGNER THIGH HIGHS ARE MY LIFESTYLE💊

hi im wren and i accidentally bought next pro 💀

69 years ago, an assembly of subgenius shapeshifters performed a chaos magic ritual. They began by mixing nice things with spice and sugar. Unbeknownst to them, in their intoxicated furor, they had inadvertently mixed another ingredient into the concoction, chemical Twitter/X, and from that styrofoam doublecup, a spirit was born into the æther. And it smelled like sulfur.

This nameless energy anomaly aimlessly inhabited a number of entities in the hours that followed, many of which, were contaminated gay frogs in the sewer system of San Fransisco, and for a short period of time, legendary basketball superstar Magic Johnson. But, the spirit did not comfortably settle until it made its way into the home of a cancer stricken hoarder, and embedded itself into an Atari 2600. 

764 fortnights later, the gaming console was placed onto a picnic table at a yard sale, and a man proceeded to purchase it. This man, was none other than a young Robert Dobbalina, a professor of pseudo-digital meta-anthropology with a doctorate in critical Christian studies at his underground bunker in the virtual heart of Compton, where he gave sermons on the virtues of ideological malthusian activism. He was also famous for self-publishing the book "I married an accelerationist and all I got was death", which was featured on an episode of Oprah that never aired.

Thus, &nbsp; was born! An occultist netlabel of royal status. The resulting music is a product of esoteric futurist methodologies, produced not by mere mortal humans, but through the use of quantum computing clusters, channeling cybernetic overlord Xenu, and his enslaved transhuman puppets on the planet of Kerlnomarxis of the Noido nebula, 88 parsecs from the hexagon of Saturn stratus.

i can’t feel my face but i can feel the beat

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