prod logan

lyrics:
fall slowly
all the debt it cost me
run, charge me
oh the pains so lovely
burn to ash
watch all unfold
safe before i crash
u were too hard to hold

it was too hard to hold
i had to let go
why won't the problems stay away
i swear this shits just getting old

fall slowly
all the debt it cost me
run, charge me
oh the pains so lovely
ur wasting so much time
but it's all apart of your plan
throw my soul in fire
as u wash me off your hands

so lovely

'goodbye' produced by heylog

lyrics:
almost 5am, i find it harder to sleep
i crack the window and i hear every animal sing
with a wind blowing soft, rustling through the leaves
admire nature as it comes alive from winter to spring
the flowers grow so tall that they start to bloom
and i just took a couple out cus i picked them for u
hoping one day you'll travel here to see what's new
cus this bouquet is gonna die if u don't visit me soon
and i
have a difficult time
spending days
when ur on my mind
wish this
would just go away
cus i'm trying to push u away
why
do i feel lonely
knowing i
hurt to see
an outcast
no one wants to be
and giggled at
n always being teased

can someone give a valid reason on why i shouldn't die
in disbelief that i will never see a point in life
i'm on and off of feeling bad and for a second i'm fine
it's so messed up and i don't think that i will ever resign
i'm so bipolar and i don't want u to see me like this
cus i guarantee i'll scare u if i speak from my chest
i didn't mean for u to leave when u saw that on my wrist
and i'm so sorry for putting u through all of this 
so why
do u keep playing w me
is it cause
u get lonely
in the night
and think of us
well it's fine
cus i think of us too
why
do i feel like this
well nevermind
cus u don't care about this
and if i die
will u grieve
and will cry
and will u miss me

CAN SOMEONE GIVE A VALID REASON ON WHY I SHOULDN'T DIE
CAUSE YOU MAKE ME WANNA KILL MYSELF OR GO GRAB THE KNIFE
I'M AT THE AGE WHERE I CAN NEVER SEE A POINT IN LIFE
IN DISBELIEF OF EVERYTHING THAT I'M JUST WASTING MY TIME
I'M SO BIPOLAR AND I DON'T WANT YOU TO SEE ME LIKE THIS
CAUSE I GUARANTEE I'LL SCARE YOU IF I SPEAK FROM MY CHEST
I'M AT THE BOTTOM OF THE OCEAN WITH ALL OF MY REGRETS
THERE'S MANY THINGS I WISH WERE GONE OR WISH I COULD RESET
I STEP INTO THE LIGHT AND DID THIS WITHOUT A GROUP
AND SO YOU NOTICING ME NOW WHEN I'M STEADY ON THE MOVE
AND YOU JUST THINK IT'S ALL OKAY TO HIT ME UP OUT OF THE BLUE
I'M NOT YOUR FRIEND OR TYPE OF BENEFIT TO SATISFY YOU
SO PLEASE GIVE A VALID REASON THAT YOU WANT ME DEAD
IS IT SAFE TO EVEN KNOW THAT THIS JUST MIGHT BE A TEST
FOR YOU TO TRICK ME INTO THINKING I'M NOTHING BUT A MESS
DELETE YOUR IMAGE THAT I LONGED FOR AND NOT SEEN AGAIN

if i can't love
will i end up
alone and forgot
or spend it w someone
i can't fall in love
my hearts dead
probably numb
i miss u my dear
it feels like it's been years

no way home
i was never close
the path ends here
don't know where to go
stone cold lies
i knew i was right
so farewell
cus this is goodbye

spotify

goodbye

produced by xona, ruevi, & oc

big thank you to all individuals who helped make this song possible <3

@ruevi @prod-oc
@heylog
@hiraethsry
@sleepywater
@sinxi
@caspywaspy
@vilsynth
@valerii
@deadfishh

the lyrics were over 4000 characters and that's the limit for soundcloud ♥

-lyrics-
https://genius.com/Xona-avoid-ii-lyrics

xona

avoid II w/ ruevi, heylog, hiraeth, sleepwater, sinxi, casperrr, vil, valerii & deadfish

produced by heylog

lyrics:
when i burn in fire
you gave a hand
i'll try not to let go
she understands
nothing is more beautiful
than your demand
i thank u for being
so delicate

i'll decide ur demeanor to me
no ambition it was never easy
on the highway he finally came clean
how the hell could you do that to me
i thought u were my bestfriend
cus i know that they don't cut ur back
text and i won't answer, get on read
don't play w my emotions i'm so delicate
so delicate

when i burn in fire 
u gave a hand
but i might just let go
and she understands
nothing is more beautiful
than your demand
i hope i treated you
better than him

walking outside notice autumnal leaves
yellow and red and a few orangish trees
the air is fresh when i'm jogging thru this subdivision
my legs hurt.. take breath heavily
run by three deer on my right
they look at me like i'm threatening their life
the parents are guarding their fawn
sometimes i wish family could be us

autumn

produced by heylog

lyrics:
i hate to say i forced myself thinking that you were sweet
but ur a monster, didn't know that you were a freak
lock me out from you and throw away the keys
i won't let you get any closer to me
put my hand on her leg and feel the ridges and scars
i feel afraid you might bury my body under tarp
so dig a grave for 2 people and make sure it is large
you're coming with, i won't die alone or we could restart

i'm not gonna bother you anymore
pulling my collar, pulling out thorns
it was an honor climbing aboard
somebody watch her out on the floor
i'm not gonna bother you ever again
pulling my collar right back where it is
i tried my hardest to help you get fixed
wasn't for long until you relapsed

say does your father know you been out
if i was him you'd have curfew, no doubt
i just want you safe getting back to the house
cause nowadays it's brutal all around
don't hold on 
to my hand
just let go now
find a man
don't look back
not a glance
as i'm crushed by
an avalanche
don't know why you'd say that
you're gonna get pay back
looking at a photo could you possibly get phased at
drinking at a club
i thought you were done
she said, "i stayed away"
but bro it's been a month
i don't wanna hate
i just never drink
you could say i'm boring all you want but i'm not phased
i don't make excuses
i simply do not do it
don't wanna see my life fall into a ruin

i'm not gonna bother you anymore
pulling my collar, pulling out thorns
it was an honor climbing aboard
somebody watch her out on the floor
i'm not gonna bother you ever again
pulling my collar right back where it is
i tried my hardest to help you get fixed
wasn't for long until you relapsed

repeat

produced by xona

@heylog

-lyrics-
deep within my own skin
i stay low until my breath
runs out and i hold my neck
cause deep down i need to rest
the only thing i need is you
a little late, i ain’t got to lose
anything to get us through
but I’ll stay like back then too

well, it’s awful to think
you’re on my mind and can’t let it deplete
sit in my room then write the lyrics to sing
but I’m discarding this energy to bring back the old me
its a tragic that i let it go
i couldn’t tell if you need me close 
well it’s too late for that now
so i can’t keep you around 
don’t need to make another sound

baby i know you love it when you see me overthink
got me pushing buttons tryna get this thing to play
never thought a girl would challenge me to use my brain
think outside the box using my logic against her game

i know you love it when you see me overthink
baby please
tell me what it means
these other guys try to steal you from me
they're enemies
break em to their knees
cut the rope
let the river flow
one at a time
kill em, let em know
baby go
get inside the boat
it's business for me to kill all them very slow

hazel

hazel w/ heylog

prod logan

lyrics:
wait here for a minute
i'll be back in a moment
tie me to a rope
pull it back, cut me open
everything we did together
(god)
likes to haunt me
i take it with a grain of salt and everything you taught me
in the end i'm still a human but you hate that
cause you put me in a bottle when u face back
and i remember we were tight but i don't trace back
so ima move on with my life and never think "past"
cause i don't wanna get caught up in flames i've been in before
i see my problems and delete like i just been through a war
and i got 24 hours and 7 days filled with bored
but when someone asks me to hang i don't have time to afford
and by that i mean i just wanna hangout by myself
& i'm sorry but i'd rather work on music n melt
cause oh my god this heat has got me sweating hotter than hell
i haven't showered for a while and i'm starting to smell
now i look into the mirror, sensing anger in me
i wanna smash it into pieces, i don't wanna be weak
i wanna get me out this town and move somewhere overseas
i'm tryna get me to the top but i'm progressing with ease
and the last thing ima do is hang my head and give up
i think they're praying me to fall but so far they're outta luck
cause i continue steady work while they're hungover as f-
and on the weekends i be staying home cause it's just as fun

again

tysm too @xona & @heylog
for jumping on the song, love ya kings <3

Lyrics.
xona -
by myself
I need your help
to leave this place and reach a realm 
where I’m safe from all of this
it’s raining and I don’t know when
this envy, this hatred will end
as long as you know it from then 
i cannot bleed for you longer
you got me locked in this somber-
state and it’s not even shocker 
you walked all way and just prospered
i can’t believe that i knew 
i would be here to rue
you’re gone without telling me too
so where do i go without you?

Heylog-
i'm almost home babe
sorry i'm a little late
i've traveled far and wide
i've seen some better days
i can't get enough
look in my eyes and tell me i look rough
here lies a soulless place
i just heard some cries that do not sound okay
heard shots coming far away
hard to misplace thoughts when they are insane
i'm here outside ur place
babe i've come home and now ur safe
i'm alright
i'm just fine
hide every cut from the fight
i'm alright
i see light
darkness gets lost from behind
i need something i can feel, something i can feel
somewhere i can hide
somewhere i can heal
u mean nothing to me now
i mean something to me now
send the warriors out to battle on the field
u know what's the deal
every enemy i fought is dead
now their families kneel
i'm sorry i had to kill ur friend and so now ur next
never saw it coming cause he's dumb
shit's a bloodybath 
i'm bleeding
they're grieving
sorry i had to kill them
i'm reaching
the ceiling
there's a new king since yours dead

enemy ft. xona & heylog

guitar played by @user-374890447

lyrics:
what do you know about this
what do you know about this
oh what do you know about this
I'm sick of saying that I'm okay

I'm sick of saying no
my friends are out while i lay at home
when time ticks i pray it don't
i wanna leave but I'm all alone
i wanna leave but I'm all alone
i wanna leave but im all alone
im sick of saying no
my friends are out while i lay at home
when time ticks i pray it don't
i wanna leave but I'm all alone
i wanna leave but I'm all alone
i wanna leave but I'm all alone

say what u done to me
you open me gave me misery
you blow out the candle as i set it alight
fate wasn't kind to me
your over me were history
into someone else
erases every part of me

I'm sick of saying no
my friends are out while i lay at home
when time ticks i pray it don't
i wanna leave but I'm all alone
i wanna leave but I'm all alone
i wanna leave but I'm all alone
I'm sick of saying no
my friends are out while i lay at home
when time ticks i prey it don't
i wanna leave but im all alone
i wanna leave but im all alone
i wanna leave but im all alone

anxiety

produced by heylog

lyrics:
can't u ever be nice
you don't have to think twice
in the moment each time that i run away
in the end it's your fault
really gave you my all
u don't have to be a problem toward me anyway

there's much more to life than going out
spend saturday night dead on the ground
𝘱𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘶𝘵
I HIGHLY DOUBT YOUR FATHER'S EVEN PROUD
JUST ANOTHER WHORE FOLLOWING THE CROWD
broken glass, the bottles enticing
she told me her sign is a pisces
𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵?
do i look like someone who even cares
𝘯𝘰 𝘨𝘰𝘥
you and i would never pair
already off on the wrong path
ur such an idiot, hope you know that
i used to find you cute but now ur trash
you can change but na you can't change ur past
text me, on your end it's open
but you don't know it
you don't know i ghosted
for once, take accountability
always excuses, please
you are disgust to me
there’s much more to life than blacking out
spend almost every weekend on the ground
i smell the alcohol stench in ur mouth
there ain’t a single to be proud of

can't u ever be nice
you don't have to think twice
in the moment each time that i run away
in the end it's your fault
really gave you my all
u don't have to be a problem toward me anyway
𝘳𝘶𝘯 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺
𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘮𝘦
𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘨𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘦

trash

produced by logan

words:
this poison make my veins stick out my skin
what kills me is the circle that i wit
i dont speak just so you couldnt wish
wish to get up on my business
i wonder what it is that youre on
in front of me is nothing but fog
im here for a sec then im gone
this cunt thinkin that he know it all
you dont know anything at all
i hear you hiss and i see you crawlin

if you could say one thing
what would it be
what would it be
what would it be
what would it be

another day of scrappin many songs
they say bro deleted so much sauce
90% of my disc. is trash
how you even listen? my shits ass
should i just keep this one in the vault
or should i just firm it on the alt
i guess youll never know just where youll see this
maybe someones gonna leak it