paperboy ft. swiiif (uglybeats)

emilee (kingtheta)

featuring safeatlast -https://soundcloud.com/safeatlast
produced by Ciche&Jarn - https://www.youtube.com/@cichejarn


there's blood on my hands oh christ
can't deal with myself all the time
won't open my eyes

fucked it up now i don't even wanna go home
i got problems with myself 
don't leave me alone
wanna melt my brain 
thoughts lead to overload
i cant see a future without overdose

without overdose
baby I might go comatose
xannies in my coat
put another paycheck in my nose

not addicted but I don't know how I could recover
if I was would you still be there for me not another

teenage suicide another stat another number
for the masses

back in school I almost o-d'd on a fuckin Xanax

I would show up off the wall like vans to all my classes

I can't see the future maybe I just need my glasses

fucked it up now i don't even wanna go home
i got problems with myself 
don't leave me alone
wanna melt my brain 
thoughts lead to overload
i cant see a future without overdose
x2

overdose (ft. safeatlast) (Ciche&Jarn)

prod acey
@notcursed :p

(ever)

im useless
im all for playing dead
im wilted    🥀
its complicated

i rub my eyes
while i contemplate it 
apologise
ive grown so complacent

(notcursed)

i dry my eyes
i learnt to erase it
i hide my crys
cus i don’t know how they’d take it
i can’t stay here tonight
my mind has me breaking
countless times
i’ve got to erase it

contemplate w/ notcursed

produced by @uvshy
thanks cam for pic
<3

i should be honest 
and i can be honest 
ill burn all my bridges 
and fulfil my promises to you

ill bury my sins deep in my garden 
was not my intention to be such a burden 
and i 

when everythings unjust 
theres nothing left here 
its all collecting dust 
right on my shelf dear

nothing before this 
it plays and it torments 
quite some time its been dormant
and my efforts exhaustive 

deep in the forest 
my mind such a torment
im unearthing burdens 
and im all alone and im

when everythings unjust 
theres nothing left here 
its all collecting dust 
right on my shelf dear

lalala

burden (prod. shy)

https://open.spotify.com/album/6XRTgfvcIfdTwsJhSzUVwB?si=-NiSKhDKSU2JF5VjEHmZ1g

really like this one, hope you feel the same <3
prod idly blare 
thanks @vito2300 for help with the mix once again <3

lyrics:
its always lurking
a feeling im not
gifted to learn
how to live through this rot
overcome all my burdens
please force me to stop
please force me to stop

im planting flowers in our garden
watching the pollen pollute my eyes
do you notice i get quiet
i think i need you here tonight
i think i need you here

i could sink in the dirt
feed my life to the worms in the earth
maybe then id be worth something
in your eyes, wouldnt that be nice

im planting flowers in our garden
watching the pollen pollute my eyes
do you notice i get quiet
i think i need you here tonight

do the daises cry
do the roses get jealous
when you're nearby

im planting flowers in our garden
watching the pollen pollute my eyes
do you notice i get quiet
i think i need you here tonight 
x2

*i wish people would take the time, to appreciate the little guy, past year and a half ive been alone, i have not been missed i get what its like, i really really wish people would reach out more, idk be a man right*

disaster averted (ft. sagebrsh) [silver]

prod me
guitar by me <3

restless in these sheets
the nightmares scare away the dreams
“if i could only have a chance to run away from everything”

but would i take it?
this is everything i know

i stay amongst the thieves
that took my life away from me
if i could only take a second of your time to let me breathe

but i cant save this
i can never feel like home.

practice what you preach
youre taking it
way too far to bring
a fraction of what the
world turned out to be
back to ashes 
avoid my company

chapter III: avoid my company

sad chill - https://youtu.be/H34VCsKB-LU?si=SPS1DPDgo66C6ok3

lyrics ⬇️ (raw vocals)

strugglin since i was 16 everyone say im addiced
wish that i had me a team that push me way farther than all my conflictions
maybe its just my condition keepin me from all my dreams
momma jus trust me if i was addicted i would be flooded with beans
life gettin harder out here but ima keep balancin on the beam
stupid crishendo makin me feel like i dont got nowhere to be
i dont got doors anymore cuz my parents do not trust me
and now i can hear the whole house
& it’s getting harder to sleep

yea but i get it i broke all my vows
never told you what this was about
it comes from the heart i dont gotta shout
just listen to words that come out my mouth

i know your not proud
but what should i do
it tears me apart you look in my eyes and dont got a clue
happy on the outside 
but sufferin in
i always wondered what it feels like on the other side of this

look at me like I failed 
maybe its cuz i did
and mom im sorry that i bailed
i really wish i didn’t
i know you think we feel different
but really often its the same
Ik i need a lot of shiftin
I know i need to feel shame
honestly i got a sickness

never grew up in the trenches
but i was out hoppin the fences 
knew what is bad and 
knew where the best is
its hard to tefrain
Im sorry im tempted
ill never go back i dont feel the same
My life is dependin
i get tbrough pain 
by lookin above
i dont need drugs i just need god
hes riddled with love

strugglin since i was 16 everyone say im addiced
wish that i had me a team that push me way farther than all my conflictions
did i say 16
matterfact meant to say 13
when i was 13 my brother had hand me my first spliff

i Thought it was great i filled up my plate
then it went wrong i sat at the pond 
and hit out the bong 
made a mistake
might be late 
way to late to go on
i wanted to stop i wnated to drop all the feelings i caught
but they all caught ahold of me
“i couldnt do it”- bologna  
you cant just stick to it partially gotta get rid of all of it
gotta make sure its gone
gotta make sure its out
dont need no bong
touchin my mouth

letter to my loved ones (yunnygoldz)

im sorry that its been a while
the time had made a heart to mend
find me in another life
i swear id try as hard again

a catalyst in heavy dark
your voice and how the bleeding stops
breath in a cold room to comfort
the surface im under for two years in sunder

fade out, start to forget me
soften the dead leaves of somebody else
brave now, but i know its early
and you couldn't hurt me but try to again

i know its been a long time

silence feels like dying
i dont mind it
i cant find you in colours i had learned to know
olive skin in amber tones, cedarwood in maple grove
eyes low the night before i drove you home
said one day we could have our own
so why am i still here alone?

did you know then it was broken?
thought you cried in the car cause it still felt so far
but instead its just not what you want

fade out, start to forget me
soften the dead leaves of somebody else
brave now, but i know its early
and you couldn't hurt me but try to again

all that it brings
cold in the spring
whats the point of waking up
if not for you again?
i dont know me now
i dont know me now

Mount Hood

cedar street w/ evergarden

decks songs that aren’t on that account anymore (mostly because they aren’t that good)

+ covers

disaster averted (ft. sagebrsh) [silver]

decks (archive)

Recent comments

brecken

bugboi

Related tracks