drain

our love (deadat18)

produced by me
guitar loop by @93feetofsmoke

lyrics:
why'd you have to call, what was so important?
fuck
i don't wanna hear ur voice at all
i knew i was bound to fall
stackin up the paper like it's nothing
posted with the vapor yeah u know i'm always stunting
i got plenty scratches and they're lining my face
i might disappear to ashes i got too much on my plate

do u remember when u told me that u were fine?
i guess that shit was a lie
i guess i'm on fucking shit suicide
how am i over it they want me to die

well i guess that's that
i've been smoking on a pack
it got stuck inside my throat and now i'm choking on the ash

bound 2 fall

produced by @jolst

featuring @sendflowrs

stuffed ft. sendflowrs (jolst)

produced by @ovrwrld

backing vocals by my sister

lyrics:
it's been overcomplicated since u started all ur talking
i just keep on moving, what am i doing?
reach out to u inside of my dreams like i was lucid
i just woke up with a pocket of tulips
cry to the bank cuz i'm fucking useless
wake up i feel like i don't wanna do this

and it hurts more than i thought it would
it feels like my friends want me dead

what makes u think that i'd ever want to talk again? 
i've been pissed off from the casualties and stupid fucking trends
i'm pretty sure i'm paralyzed
i'm pretty sure i don't feel alright

my momma told me stop it with the painted nails ponytails
saw me on the rails
didn't say shit when i failed (x2)

painted nails & ponytails (ovrwrld)

produced by @polar333 x @remghost

lyrics:
i just cut my leg in the shower 
no one here to help me after hours
u got plenty bitches on ur side, mine badder
didn't see ur intentions yeah i couldn't see the patterns
switch up on me every day ur causing a disaster
i thought we were moving forward now it's different it's all backwards
i just been on some shit that u would never know
why u all so scared of me? ur standing on ur toes

it's not my fault i keep on falling apart
and if u tell me it's all better i might give myself a chance to restart
i just keep on spilling black blood
drank too much i'm throwing up my guts
i miss getting fucked up having fun
back when we were kids up on the run
way before i ever thought about facing a gun

i just cut my leg in the shower 
no one here to help me after hours
u got plenty bitches on ur side, mine badder
didn't see ur intentions yeah i couldn't see the patterns
switch up on me every day ur causing a disaster
i thought we were moving forward now it's different it's all backwards
i just been on some shit that u would never know
why u all so scared of me? ur standing on ur toes

disaster (polar x remghost)

produced by @johnnyfriend

featuring @rouri404

my favorite view ft. rouri404 (johnnyfriend)

produced by @threedimensionsapart

lyrics:
i never wanted to waste ur time
gave u everything like it was never even mine
i don’t wanna look into a screen any longer
that boy looked at me the wrong way he got slaughtered 
ain’t nobody taking my offer and now all my scars hurt more than they did before
i don’t know what i’m waiting for (x2)

i don’t wanna talk
i’m dying i swear to god
ever since i met u we been on and off
ever since i met u i forgot how to stand tall
i think that i’ve had enough
i’m fucking tired of love
how come i’m still not tough
like what the fuck

enough (tda)

cry ft. k0a

produced by @jolst

lyrics:
i don't know why u were saying that u had my back
u treat me like a punching bag every single chance u have
sick of u keeping me on my ass
push me down a hundred times and i always come back

gas pack gas pack think i need a gas mask
triple sevens in my wallet but i still can't
i apologize to everyone for not giving a fuck
i apologize to myself for never being enough

i can't find my way home
so much for not being alone
so much for so much for so much for not

lately i just feel like i have not been part of this community
do some drugs every day that shit got thru to me
i took way too long and no ones here to help me out
raindrops on my head i'm looking for some shelter now

and when i kiss u can u kiss me back for once?
make me feel like we're not doing this for fun
i've had enough i'm so done
at this point i just keep feeling that i'm not the one

i always come back (jolst)

target ft. polar

produced by @prodguda

lyrics:
i miss playing with ur hair before we'd fall asleep
this time i don't think i'll see u in the morning
put a cigarette inside my mouth i'm hoping that it kills me
i can't handle change it's never feeling like the real thing

yeah i tried to fix my heart with surgery it didn't work
everybody take a turn tryna murder me i'll go first
nowadays everybody getting in my way
from the start all i wanted was for u to stay

never taking care of myself i may as well be rotting in the ground
usually i get myself to breathe easily but not right now
not right now

stay (guda)

produced by @dercept

lyrics:
i done tried to speak my heart a thousand times and it gets nowhere
i thought i could change myself for the better instead i say it's not fair 
my enemies reach out to me they like it when i tear
i tried being humble think i did that for the last time
sitting in my bubble tryna figure out my past lives
like did i ever get it right?
have i changed in the slightest?
i promise i don't bite

i don't think u really get it 
wake up feeling double headed
two headaches need double the medicine
two pm so i hop out of bed
empty stomach my health in the red
i still been trippin over what u said
seventeen feet under and i can not catch a breath
maybe i'm holding on to u cuz i don't got anything left
if i let go it's for the best i don't want us to be dead
i don't want us to be dead (x2)

i dnt want us 2 b dead (dercept)

produced by @jolst

lyrics:
in the past few days it feels like i spent a fortune
everything is so fucked can't even comprehend a portion
u treat me like shit i adore it
started closing all the doors in
i am not important (x2)

heard u the first time ok ok
how can i get out of bed when i can't even keep my head on straight?
u want me losing on top of the shit that i deal with on a daily basis
yeah my lifes got limited time left and i think i'm gonna waste it

i'm just gonna waste my time

oh fuck i'm gon relapse i had big dreams i might ditch that
maybe i'll look tough if i got a wrist tat
i can't fucking breathe, what is it for?
i've given up so many times before
not just a burden it's a rotting in my core

heard u the first time ok ok
how can i get out of bed when i can't even keep my head on straight?
u want me losing on top of the shit that i deal with on a daily basis
yeah my lifes got limited time left and i think i'm gonna waste it

okayok (jolst)

produced by @deadyami

lyrics:
amount to nothing amount to nothing
i was too distracted doing shit to make u melt
cry in the back of the whip i need help
reach for my pants and i tug on my belt
i see the fire i think i'm in hell
i was never doing well

i can not trust em all
they wanna see me losing
u prayed on my downfall once i done rubbed all my doubts off
i take out a crossbow got some range
bust through ur skull and i'm popping ur veins
leave that boy tongue tied he's thinking i'm deranged

thinking i'm deranged x4

i'm wasting all my time
on people i don't even like
when did all my nightmares come to life
since when did i need u to kiss me goodnight
that's alright
is it alright if i die?
at least i can say that i tried

u don't ever gotta tell me twice if i fuck it up again i'll cut out both my eyes
and i'll sell em on the internet for a pretty good price
cuz they just sit there and watch it all collapse

i'm wasting all my time
on people i don't even like
when did all my nightmares come to life
since when did i need u to kiss me goodnight
that's alright
is it alright if i die?
at least i can say that i tried

tried (dead yami)

produced by me

lyrics:
yeah ur listening to me right now but are u really hearing it?
i was speaking to the void and unaware that it got serious
oh i could avoid my problems but then i'm not feeling it
if u can't face it head on ur delirious 

oh i can barely look inside the mirror
fuck the angel that said i was in the clear
recently i'm only used to drowning in my tears
life is only complicated when u overcome ur fears

is it wrong if i say that i hope u die?
nobody really being nice so why should i smile?
is it wrong if i admit that i never tried?
i was busy picturing u with another guy
why why
i guess i gave up after all
i was sitting round waiting for a call
u don't understand a thing about me it's alright
i'll be waiting up all night

wrong

produced by @dercept x @johnnyfriend

hold my breath and count to 60 so i'm red
finally came out of my shell can't believe this is what i get
back to square one it isn't new to me
i know that i'll level up again in time i'm steady moving

wait up
how come nobody ever asks me how i'm doing anymore?
broken glass i can see it shatter from the top floor
yeah this life can give me everything i'm still gon fuckin want more
got my weapons maxed out i'm bouta pull up with a god sword
defend myself cuz i can't lose my heart again
i can't fall asleep at night it gets me wondering where the comfort went
u can leave me in the next few days and i'll still wish u well
u said that ur going places only place ur going is hell

i'm barely alive like can u tell?
late at night i'm getting fried threw my roach into the well
darling i don't feel too well
u don't gotta solve all of my problems but i'm hoping that u help

wait up
how come nobody ever asks me how i'm doing anymore?
broken glass i can see it shatter from the top floor
yeah this life can give me everything i'm still gon fuckin want more
got my weapons maxed out i'm bouta pull up with a god sword
defend myself cuz i can't lose my heart again
i can't fall asleep at night it gets me wondering where the comfort went
u can leave me in the next few days and i'll still wish u well
u said that ur going places only place ur going is hell

wonder (dercept x johnnyfriend)

produced by @deadyami

lyrics:
i'm always the person u lean on 
look inside that purse cuz i was wondering what she's on
i'm just sick of feeling nothing (x2)

i break my back and break my shoulders
u kept me together when the nights got colder
i thought i was doing better, doing good before i met her
can't learn a lesson if i'm never taught
look what we've got here in our hands 
its close to nothing
i'm only holding on if u wait for me
but don't wait for me

i wake up looking for u
ur the first thing on my mind
and if i lie to u
it would be a waste of time so i think i'm gonna treat u right

i'm always the person u lean on 
look inside that purse cuz i was wondering what she's on
i'm just sick of feeling nothing (x2)

i break my back and break my shoulders
u kept me together when the nights got colder
i thought i was doing better, doing good before i met her
can't learn a lesson if i'm never taught
look what we've got here in our hands 
its close to nothing
i'm only holding on if u wait for me
but don't wait for me

never mention me again
when ur hanging with ur friends
by the way they're wack
always talked behind my back
i thought there were 2 sides to every story
all these bitches have been busy soaking in their glory 
u been talking bout these digits u don't tote no 40s
i think lately all i ever do is fucking worry

b4 i met her (dead yami)

produced by @deadyami

lyrics:
ran out of options way before i knew it
i can't even exaggerate what i've been through
i don't know what the fuck u want me to do
maybe it's bout time i put my brain to use

meanwhile while ur healing i'm not 
never see me again it's ur loss
u put in more i put in less
with everything i do there's never someone to impress

and it hurts to know that u wish u never met me
it felt like i couldn't break out
it feels different when i'm looking at ur face now
i'll stay alive if u just set me free
i never even know what u mean
now i'm just a 1 man team
i'm not what i wanted to be
no i'm not what i wanted to be

graduated and they're still not proud of me
it's always been so hard for u to see
maybe if i finish college i can get a move on
i don't need u pointing out the things that i do wrong
u put in more i put in less
with everything i do there's never someone to impress

and it hurts to know that u wish u never met me
it felt like i couldn't break out
it feels different when i'm looking at ur face now
i'll stay alive if u just set me free
i never even know what u mean
now i'm just a 1 man team
i'm not what i wanted to be
no i'm not what i wanted to be

not what i wanted 2 b (dead yami)

produced by @p-guda

lyrics:
dammit when she gon fuckin stop
did too much
i been in a time crunch
in a race to fuckin mention what i did and now it's done
just forgetting what we had now
swear i didn't mean to lash out
makes me wanna vomit when u put me in the background
*blehhh*
kinda figured they don't want me around

there's not a thing that i was destined for
i don't want a kiss i want u out that door
ur the only one i adore
i'm sorry for the tension
still not cool with me yeah i forgot to mention
i'm like jacksen when u see me as a clown
nowadays i don't make a sound
but regardless i'll be smoking loud

dammit when she gon fuckin stop
did too much
i been in a time crunch
in a race to fuckin mention what i did and now it's done
just forgetting what we had now
swear i didn't mean to lash out
makes me wanna vomit when u put me in the background
*blehhh*
kinda figured they don't want me around

time crunch (guda)

produced by @dercept x @daks9k

featuring @kuriositylol & @x1fern

lyrics:
(claude)
do u wanna fall in love?
i can kiss on ur lungs
i don't know him well
but i bet that ur boyfriend's pretty dumb
i saw my ships set sail and then they sunk
(x2)

i want two souls colliding
i want u so bad but i'm so focused on the timing
i've been stacking gold but i can't find the silver lining

(kuriosity)
oh, i wanna go
girl i think i wanna go back
oh i wanna know
like did this ever mean somethin
to u
all that u out me through 
there's nothing else to do
you left me so confused 

and so i try my best
i did all i could 
got nothing else to give
got no way to live (x2)

(claude)
do u wanna fall in love?
i can kiss on ur lungs
i don't know him well
but i bet that ur boyfriend's pretty dumb
i saw my ships set sail and then they sunk
(x2)

i want two souls colliding
i want u so bad but i'm so focused on the timing
i've been stacking gold but i can't find the silver lining

(fern)
don't even know what i'm saying
like everything feeling so lame ya
i know that i said that i hate ya
i'm out of touch and out of focus

ur the worst thing i never had
u always been treating me bad
sit alone as i'm counting my bag
u never noticed this life is bogus

emporium ft. kuriosity & 1fern (dercept x daks9k)

produced by @deadyami & @jauntsen

lyrics:
i fear i'm not enough again
my friends all feed me oxygen
but i'm at a point where they can not help me anymore
had another breakdown and move on with my day
it felt like something i could not escape
they said it's my fault cuz i'm tired and lazy
centipedes in my mind they all start the invading
i don't know why i was waiting
but i know that i was patient
i tell myself that it was worth it

i remember watching bands perform in that basement
holding onto u cuz there could never be replacements
when i first put my hand out never thought that u would take it
i swear that it was the best thing that i've felt in a while
my happiness was based around your smile
and it faded so fast

worth it (dead yami x jauntsen)

produced by @p-guda

soundcloud only <3

lyrics:
wore off
i don't wanna breathe no more
tore off
every feature u adore
so what am i left with?
a body i cant look at anymore
u will not find me where i been residing
at this point they all gon think im in hiding
always unstable but im never minding

i keep my door locked and my notebook blank
want no tension and no restrains
not sure when i turned to fresh air to feel alive
it's hard to breathe in with ur mouth when ur tongue stays tied
treated like i don't know what i'm talking about i fucking doubt it
oh u really thought u figured me out?
now i'm surrounded by the ones i love so how come it don't feel like they love me
love isn't more than a ceiling above me
i am not keeping a record but i've been ahead of the game for a minute
seep in the gutter i'm pulling u under i said would stop but i didn't
nowhere left to live u can take me out
will u make songs about me even when i'm not around?
all the stars look at me asking why i'm never keeping count

keeping count (guda)

produced by me

lyrics:
i'm not an object for to dismantle and build again
i'm not getting stronger my addictions are the evidence
make so much time and they can't give me a second
i leave the room they enjoy the lack of my presence 
i'll walk down the hall avoid the scene get rid of my essence

treat me like a bitch and i'll be back with a weapon
bad nights end with close saves i call them blessings
i can barely make it through the pm when my chest stings
fall down gotta show em life can teach the best things
what i learned so far is that it's never too late to start
don't hope the best for the acquaintances that tear u apart

i can't really help but feel my life is going nowhere
hold on just a minute can u please stay here
made it to eighteen but no one told me that it snows here
fold so many times but i'm never gonna show my tears
i really thought i was in the clear
don't fall out of love my dear
if u do then be sincere

u kept me calm in times like this ur gone
i miss ur lazy yawns late at night with tv on
and the bunker is where i'll remain
don't get too close we're not the same
sometimes i wanna detonate like i was a c4
i don't really wanna die yet i wanna see more
all i know is i don't wanan go

show my tears

produced by me

lyrics:
i still have more to say
so how can i lay here like nothing's wrong
i don't wanna think about the time i lost
i don't wanna think at all
oh they wanna watch me fall
i watch it all dissolve

permanence does not exist in the slightest
think i had a feeling that i wouldn't like this
i hear sirens from wherever i've been
all i ask for is a little bit of guidance
fell onto my face and i don't really wanna try again
feel this empty space and all i'm gonna do is hold it in

fuck u
ur a bitch
talkin on my name u know that shit was fuckin useless
i come back like every single time they gon know who it is
runnin up my funds i get this money while they're clueless

permanence

produced by @dercept & ayoley

lyrics:
it's not easy for me (x2)
chemicals have taken full control and i'm not even worried
it has to be because of me

i've done nothing to prevent this
i know that all good things come to an end
but i never got a chance to begin

i stay crammed inside this fucking room
it's already far too late for me cuz i've been consumed
i don't know what's the use

wait four more days
i'll just recollect myself and take the blame
i guess u really gotta lose to win the game
i sit in the back of the parking lot while i waste away
every day i'm following a similar schedule
should have known it from the start my fucking heart wasn't edible
but i guess things change and u did too
all along i really was the gum under ur shoe

i stay crammed inside this fucking room
it's already far too late for me cuz i've been consumed
i don't know what's the use
it's not easy for me (x6)

it's not easy for me (dercept x ayoley)

produced by @p-guda x @ilikecatsuknow

featuring @kryst3n

lyrics:
(kryst3n)
and i know
i'll never compare but i tried
thought ur heart was where i could reside
thought ur there for me but u lied 
u can kill me it's eye for an eye
cuz i was eating u up alive
wasn't there a lot but i tried
and if u ask me ur living a lie

(claude)
i just give more
what is this for?
u stay on the high ground i've been done with this war
i'll pretend u never left me sore
located my hideout then i start to miss more
always been a bitch, whore
u might see me hanging from the ceiling somewhere in the store
(x2)

high ground ft. kryst3n (guda x 1win.rare)

produced by me

lyrics:
nowhere for me to go
why am i back in ur home
so much for taking it slow
i move quick so fast they would never even know
bong rips and i rip it again
test me, start fillin with led
does that really happen? don't know it depends
do i need some traction to start getting friends
no more distractions and leaving it all on the fence
ahead of everyone that i've been talking to i can't connect

fuck a breathe in, breathe out
i'm bouta sink in, no drought
one eye closed keep one on u now
i think i'm wanting u now

it's best to say goodbye to everyone i love
better now before i'm gone
please don't stick around too long
i do my best, still callin SOS
got an invitation it's so hard to accept
can't show up the first time i bank on a rain check
everything inflicted on me started out painless
put less work now i'm getting paid less
i'd learn way more if i wasn't brainless
don't give a fuck what they wanna say next
say next

rain check

produced by @p-guda

lyrics:
step back and let me analyze
it's their bad and my loss, i'm just crushed inside
just let me go, please just let me go
nothing left for u to know
i'm just sick of only keeping to myself on the low
i guess soon it will be over
3 steps back, guess ill never get closure

am i even speaking?
do u hear me?
i just get ignored and i'm never taken seriously
guide me
just acknowledge that i love u and i'm trying
really don't wanna go back home, probably shouldn’t say it i might come off as an asshole
(fuck you)
time stalling, i was taking backroads
i'm falling deep into a trash load

was it worth it?
(no)
i know i can not be perfect
u said it was part of the learning
now i’m too scared to talk
can either of u open up ur arms when i start to feel lost?
i guess not (yeah i guess not)
i guess soon it will be over
3 steps back, guess i'll never get closure

am i even speaking?
do u hear me?
i just get ignored and i'm never taken seriously
guide me
just acknowledge that i love u and i'm trying
really don't wanna go back home, probably shouldn’t say it i might come off as an asshole
(fuck you)
time stalling, i was taking backroads
i'm falling deep into a trash load

claude

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