Battles I'm in / wrote for.

rap battles

I was going to put something here like don't take this battle seriously but I can't lie it's catchy LMAOOO. 
no this battle doesn't really have a connection other than cult classic type things but honestly i just wanted to make it for fun in between serious battles LMAO

Thumbnail by Dani Onion Rings (thx bby)
Beat by Adamack.
Writing, vocals and mixing done by me.

Lyrics:
RAP BATTLE!
ROBOCOP!
VS!
PEE-WEE HERMAN!
BEGIN!


Robocop:
Robocop tops hacks like megacorporations
Your franchise's been forgotten with no hope of gentrification
You're not a kid's hero, you're a pedophile creeper
Search mode activated: Detecting a bullshitter
The fuck was Burton thinking spotlighting such a bother?
Bug eyes, ruffled collar. I wouldn't buy your movie for a dollar!
I say HB-no to your gimmicks, ride off before this ends in defeat
Your move, creep

Pee-wee Herman:
Kids, the secret words today are wannabe Judge Dredd!
Who for the rest of the world would've done better off dead!
Now I'll have you know that I respect authority!
But the only Cyborg I respect is if he's from D.C!
Get out my Playhouse you cyberpunk or I'll make you myself!
Ride in not out to Orion and hit him at the belt!
I'm at the pinnacle of kids television, must watch, can't diss them!
Least I'm consistent! Your remakes? Even you'd want to miss them!


Robocop:
Between entertainment and disturbing, you're at the border
Grown man with a case of dissociative identity disorder!
And Peter Pan Syndrome, it's evident from the crowd
that you're a washed up stand up-comedian that needs to sit down
If this was a dick measuring game your name stands up to task
Leaving you falling off the Big Top, my prime directive's kicking ass
But you have balls taking your alter ego off the shelf
Last I heard, the champion of kids was caught pleasuring himself

Pee-wee Herman:
Aahhh! Kids, he's a comedian; like me!
Spewing out jokes bone-dry and monotone in originality!
Like his voice, robotic Bane and Darth Vader!
I rule the Golden Age, you're a step behind the Terminator!

Robocop:
Your childish VHS tapes should be left in the Groundling!
No matter who heard your bird-like screeches, they'd want to give you a pounding!
I'm Cult Classic material, your legacy isn't hardy!
If I wanted to eat a Reuben, I'd slide into Arby's!

WHO WON?!
WHO'S NEXT?!
YOU DECIDE!
ON THE NEXT SERIOUS RAP BATTLE!!!

Pee-wee Herman VS Robocop: Rap Battle 4.

A duel between the lions commences. Which will come out victorious?

VinnyO as Roy
Alex the Beast as Simba
Flowtest stolen from Dustin
Beat prod by Dansonn
Thumbnail by Geon
Mixed by Dustin
Written by R the Writer

Roy:
I won't lose to one who lost faith in himself so why even bother
When I stampede and slaughter the track just like your father
Make my soldiers shake their spears, going ham on you hamlet
Roasting your entire kingdom and serving them at a banquet 
I'm flaming like my blade while all you emanate’s insipidity 
So with burns it's best not to test my fire affinity
Sure, you're showered with sequels and a remake to pad your income
But I only left behind legends, while you abandoned your kingdom

Simba:
A lion locking onto prey? That's the circle of life
When I roar out these raps, pridefully rocking the mic
I'm taking over with a hot bern that my bars have fostered
Your lines were filler like your inclusion in the smash roster
My storyline's continuations prove my fame is unyielding 
Couldn't match my strength even with the blade you're wielding 
Your cavalary's left cowering, their steeds I'll be devouring 
I'll mop the floor with your carcass in this second scouring

Roy:
Don't need any seals to outclass an outcast hermit
Who spent his days eating bugs and hanging out with vermin
I'm defeating thugs, determined to seal your fate like durandal 
You handle your bars worse than mufasa's mantle
You're lion if you say that your son's guard poses a threat
I've seen more advanced tactics from other mindless beasts I've met
Even your girl's pinned you, so don't mind if I implore that
You'd be better off like your uncle, a beaten up doormat

Simba:
I find it humorous that even in zephiel's insanity
He made the correct choice in giving up on humanity
I'm iller than eliwood, hell he would be a better enemy
Than a brat who's less known than his mother's identity
With your blade's flames, I'll write you off as a warm-up
Dropping you in this brawl, making you pay more than four bucks
This won't end with a cliffhanger, instead you'll fall off
I laugh in danger's face, but yours, prince? I scoff

Check out Vinny's album
https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/no-signal/1348170683
https://play.google.com/store/music/album/Vinny_O_No_Signal?id=Be3un2s25gm5tmgjzyvdii64jq4

Roy Vs Simba - Rap Battle

Bork has ascended into the realm that us humans cannot quite comprehend--and never shall... Alas, he graced me with his presence for a series.

a new joke series which i think is unironically the best thing ever created

Bork as Toaster Strudel
Julian as Poptarts

LYRICS:
BORK AND JULIAN RAP BATTLES!
(this battle is an anime special)
POPTARTS!
VS!
TOASTER STRUDEL!
(who the hell is going to win? Let’s see!)

Poptart:
You don’t give people enough icing.
I got that shit dripping right off the sides.
Lettin’ it all hang out, this is already your lost fight,
Better get ready for freddy, I’m ‘boutta Pop the mic!
Fuck off, Hans Strudel, I like Hans Christian Andersen.
A man just asked which is better, shall you answer him?
I’m better, millions of units sold each year.
You need a packet; I’m built ready, hot or cold, c’mon, get near!

Toaster Strudel:
Gonna go alpha on this little crusty piece of ass.
Pillsbury-ing fakes in the ground real fast.
Bork as Peasant Child is the best cast.
Don’t need hundreds of flavors to leave you dead in last!
Fight me, bite me, I’m delicious, to be honest.
You didn’t pop anything, but Poptart’s gettin’ a popping!
I’m the boss, you lost, I logged Kellogg’s loss, believe it.
Something better just popped up, it was your penis. : )

BUT ARE THEY ALONE?!

WHO WON?!
WHO'S NEXT?!
YOU DECIDE!
ON THE NEXT BORK & JULIAN RAP BATTLE!

Poptart VS Toaster Strudel: The Best Soundcloud Rap Battle Ever Created.

Surprise! Welcome to Season 2.

Written, mixed and voiced by: Julian.
Thumbnail by: Legion.

Lyrics:
RAP BATTLE!
HOMER THE POET!
VS!
DANTE!
BEGIN!

Homer the Poet:
Stumble into this fight? And I thought I was the one who was blind.
Going on an Odyssey against an oddity; and this Devil May Cry.
I’m a Trojan, busting walls down in this fight to make thee fall like Troy, forlorn!
You defiled the term Sweet New Style. Your little movement’s been done before, And now I’m  already bored!

Dante Aligheri:
You couldn’t stand against my stanzas. I won’t pander, I’m a pander, dare to fight me?
There was nothing poetic about your verse structure, believe me, I know about rhyme scheme!
Fight me? Then spit it as you are, choose any of your gaggly plethora of languages!
Whilst I take the reins, I reign! And Dante Alighieri’s allegories are pentameters higher than Homer Simpson!


Homer the Poet:
And you claim to be better? Certainly don’t show it.
I’m anonymous and STILL a better Poet!
Your rap structure? Divine Comedy’s what it is!
Bring me to attention with some Tuscan Chicken!
You Italians don’t have a pot to piss in.
Be a critic? I started this big wit lit!
He who wrote Inferno can’t spit any fire.
I’m a Pantheon, and every layer of your pyre!
I’m toxic on the track; hemlock.
The Bedrock your turf was built upon!
You’re elastic while I stretch wide, Play-Doh.
Leading the people of Greece, just ask Plato!
You weren’t taught well enough, chances shot.
Even if you aren’t Great, here’s my school of thought!
While literature becomes even more fine.
I rule centuries, you’re buried in the sands of time!

Dante Aligheri:
I suppose I would expect the first clown to pick up a quill would write tales poor...
Whilst I wear the crown of the Three upon my head, I’ll knock the self-proclaimed one off of yours.
As if it’d make them more to my liking, you chose to rap your trash all fast.
Yet my words of rhyme scheme? You aren’t the only one to bring such to pass!
Sei fregato...
Yes, inspired for centuries.
Yet your Oddyssey? People want to start forgetting!
Talking to me about fire, are we?
Wrote the Iliad, yet your songs are ear-bleedingly alarming!
Your style is that of a swine, unrelatable!
Who wrote your sloppy works? Debatable!
Bring out LAYERS of Hell onto your fables!
People question your existence! What do you bring to the table?!
Middle Ages and yet I kick it modern!
It’s the Supreme against this honorless goner!
Slay a text suitor as my rhymes crescendo!
Your style’s Purgatory; in a perpetual limbo!
But alas, I understand zeros writing heroes!
From the sick I spit you’d best phone Hippo!
You’re a bust, and now I feel.
Left in the dust by betters is your Achilles Heel!

WHO WON?!
WHO'S NEXT?!
YOU DECIDE!
ON THE NEXT... RAP BATTLE!

Rap Battle Season 2 Battle 1: Homer the Poet VS Dante Alighieri

In this short rap battle we have Pancake from 60 Seconds vs Diogee from Milo Murphy's Law

Written by Tuna
Coverart by Dani
Mixed by Dustin
Beat by Kustom

Julian as Pancake
Tuna as Diogee

Lyrics:

Pancake:
It seems that in my expedition I found an item of no use
But I feel going Ruff would get me fined for animal abuse
Let me lay down the Murphy’s Law because I’m the dominant species
There’s no way to Bunker down when your rhymes Bucket feces 
Teds up, I spit rhymes sicker than any suitcase water
In lyrical war with me is where dog go to get slaughtered
Don’t follow me! “It’s too dangerous” you’re taking the L alone
Cause after I take the win they’ll yell “Diogee Go Home”

Diogee:
Expect it won’t be Unexpected to see you flat like a Pancake
I’ll make sure you Fall-Out, because this dog is getting baked
You’ve got “60 Seconds” to live, because your game is the worst
One thousand soups couldn’t get you to Shari-Cough up a good verse
You’re more bloated than Mary Jane and more ugly than the Mutant
There’s no getting past me even if you “Sneak like an army man”
You don’t need to bring an axe to know this dog’s of no need
Especially since you were forgotten after the Cat DLC

Pancake vs Diogee - Rap Battle

Smosh Games Vs Normal Boots

Epic Rap Battles Of Cartoons Vs Epic Cartoon Made Rap Battles Original

William has tiks vs The Tik tock

WvsW flowtest

Notch Vs Scott but its zander

Mumkey Jones: Creep Switch
Filthy Frank: Swoldow EVGRB
Beat: http://www.shadowville.com/124751/genres/gangsta-beats/grind-hours
Written by: ColeDaCole, Mason G
Cover art by Jason Carreon
Mixed by Supah Master

Mumkey:
Hi folks, welcome to the Depression Chamber, this’ll be a quick fight
So here’s Mumkey’s Declassified Guide; on how to terminate the mic
Riddling holes in this weeb’s throat, spit sick to leave you dismantled
I suggest you’d best abandon this battle, like it was your channel
Listen up, George Miller Lite, your popularity must be a mistake
I’m supposed to be impressed by the loser who started the Harlem Shake?
I wouldn’t pay $5 for your modern shitty slow-pop trash, man
And now the State of Your YouTube is unwanted, copied, forgotten, and abandoned.  

Frank:
Welcome to the rice fields motherfucker, where I'm growing organic crops
But with your rotting depression gimmick, I say it’s time to stop!
This Zoomer’s Rusty, cage him up so he no longer survives
You know, Jeff Kinney got it right: you ain’t got a social life!
Notch’s favorite channel? I'd say you should keep that discrete. 
You best call up Assburger to give you some help on the beat (heh)
Shut it with your rubber mask, the Wheel of Punishment already fucked you up
Remember jackass: sideways for attention, long way for results

Jumkey Mones:
Hey Mumkey, let me get some Retribution on behalf of his fans
Mumkey:
Wow, never thought I’d find a bigger horse faced bitch than Susan
I’ve packed up my mailbag, shots fired like Elliot Rodger!
Hey Alexa, play the Naruto end theme, this is over

Frank:
Coolest monkey in the jungle? Now I'd say that's stretching it
Don’t need Das the Sauceboy to know all your content is just shit
Now let me end this battle, you can have a Sheepover there
When I send you back to jungle as a Pimp in a Wheelchair

Mumkey Jones vs. Filthy Frank | Rap Battle

Jade as The Boner Pill Salesman
Dani as Sven
Written by Cole
Beat: https://instaud.io/3Zmz (When The Beat Drops by InsaneBeatz)
Cover art by Aaron G 
Mixed by Light

The Boner Pill Salesman (0:10-0:30):
I was expecting a good matchup, but ‘le blocky mutt has arrived’
The second time you’ll drown in flow, but this time you won’t survive
Doesn’t matter that you’re from Minecraft, I’m still the best MC
You’re as lost as Dinnerbone, trying to step up to me
Best hope your flame retardant, cause on this track I’m burning
Once I’m done testing this new subject I’ll leave you dead with Joergen
I’m seriously spilling T, Felix lost, and so have you
So many of your friends have died, half of your world is filled with tombs!

Sven (0:30-0:50):
I’ll be freeing your subjects from the hell you make them live in
Fighting me when you’ve scrapped your medics ain't a good decision   
Let’s talk about dogelore, who’s users sure ain’t fly like Klaus
A group of depressed millennials crying about their life through wacky dogs 
Your meme’s been melk-ed dry, I’m spilling blood and that’s a fact, see
I’ve got bedrock hard raps to collapse you and your factory
So much editing, at this point, you barely resemble a dog
Thank god your verse wasn’t like your story: painfully long!

The Boner Pill Salesman (0:50-1:00):
That verse was pretty cringe, bro, you’re running out of ideas
So badly put together, did you buy your raps from Ikea?
Not even my all of my products could harden your soft ass rhymes
Looks like the minecraft series is over, cause Sven just died

Sven (1:00-1:10):
Take a chromch out of this, you need decoys to stay alive
I’ll have you know, these aren’t the first creeper’s blows that I’ve survived
When it comes to flowing on a beat, I’ve seen better from Water Sheep
Now it’s finally time for Wonka’s knockoff to be put to sleep

TheBonerPillSalesman vs. Sven | Rap Battle

TheAngryMidget as Unwanted House Guest 
Supah as The Bogeyman 
Beat: http://www.shadowville.com/audio//Shadowville.com%20-%20Backfire.mp3 
Writers: Cole 
Mixed by Light
Cover by Trakked

Unwanted House Guest (0:10-0:31)
Let’s dance, Bogeyman, show me what Sack Man’s got
This ain’t a kid you’re messing with, so take your best shot
No need to lurk in the shadows, I’m sure I’ll be just fine
Judging by last night when I watched you practicing your lines
Don’t be surprised, that flash by the window wasn’t headlights
So crawling back under the bed won’t save you from this fight
You’re dangling your win off the bed, and it’s just asking to be grabbed
Like the remote when your flick comes on, worse than Slenderman’s!

The Bogeyman (0:31-0:52):
Emerging from the shadows: the beast that haunts children's dreams, 
Who’s forced to face this foe who’s nothing but a forgotten dead meme
Hiding in corners won’t help you, I know where you are. Always.
You’re tame compared to horror stories and what the net’s got nowadays
Despite your font of choice, you couldn’t leave any Impact
No legacy left behind, just the Babadook’s copycat
Here’s some advice, animal, run back to 4-chan while you can
Tell the nerds on /b/ to watch their backs, ‘fore they see The Bogeyman

Unwanted House Guest (0:52-1:03):
You wanna turn the lights off? Fine then, GAME ON!
Trying to fight me with a verse on par with your folklore songs
You like to kill little kids, but you’re Digg-ing your grave this time
Can’t see your loss in the dark? I CAN SEE IT JUST FINE!

The Bogeyman (1:03-1:14):
Acting like some stalking god, when you can barely even diss
Just a freak who’s fear factor falls next to sleep paralysis  
The web doesn’t Know Your Meme, and it seems in the end
You’re just one more naughty child that’ll never be seen again

Unwanted House Guest vs. The Bogeyman | Rap Battle

Dani as Baldi 
Alex as The Janitor 
Written by Cole               
Cover art by Lauren
Mixed by Light
Beat by Kustom

Baldi (0:15-0:26):
Welcome to my schoolhouse, Janitor, this’ll be a Bash!
Although your illiteracy might make it hard to pass my class
Steal a victory against me? I’m afraid you don’t have the key
So weak, flames from my campfire are enough to leave you beat

The Janitor (0:26-0:38):
Stupid Baldo… Making me mop up your messy flow
I’ll impale this freak with my mop if he wants to trade blows
I’m biscuit ball-ing on this beat, you’re more robotic than Penny
Kick-start having some ideas, or you best skedaddle, Baldi

Baldi (0:41-1:04):
I can’t send ya back to prison, but I can dish out some detention
To this loser who needed MatPat to get anyone’s attention
Step up to me with your glass hip? I’d like to see you try
When you’ve been killed by Kindergartners three different times!
This ain’t a janitor war, I’m not interested in your mop
But I’ll still spill your blood like B-Soda, I’ve got my win on lock!
“Wow! You exist!’ is the highest praise your games receive
Playtime is over, Janitor, and now you’re out of time to leave

The Janitor (1:04-1:28):
Your verse was missing all it’s disses, what is this? Hide and Seek?
Guess that's what I should’ve expected from a game made in 2 weeks
Even with your fog machine, I can see straight through all your lines
Clippy’s defective if he thinks that he’s getting the First Prize 
You’re on tier with shitty flash games, it’s no Riddle, you’re a fad
Next you’ll be saying ‘My verse was ironic! It was meant to be bad!’
Peddling a basic horror game to kids: it’s just shoddy
Once I’m done with ya the dumpster will have one more body

Baldi vs. The Janitor | Rap Battle

ColeTheCole