Bonus rap battle spin-off of Lame-Ass Rap Battles. More goofy match ups, one verse each, no announcer, and is likely to have episodes better than the main series.

Half-Ass Rap Battles

50 RIM

LYRICS

Harry Warden:
Spent a long time in these mines, I can clean out your local river
Of the 80’s movie-flopping, frame-dropping, bloated killer
Voorhees? What does a swampy zombie got for me
When he’s roasted on the beat and left under broken quarries?!

Jason Voorhees:
Roasting me? Please, I’ve survived that twice already
It’ll be easy leaving your worthless life as dead meat with my machete!
Murdered many minors, a miner wouldn’t be far off
So which one of your personalities will I leave a mark on?
Slander slashers with your slapstick like it’s what you’ll premiere on?
But looking at the winners circle- Harry's not here Tom.
Erupting methane levels as if you’re trying to rock me
Take my mask, I know Canadian’s love their hockey
Think I’m sloppy? A Halloween copy’s what they offer me?
Like sticks and stones, I’ll smash Harry’s brittle bones like they’re Potter-y

Harry Warden:
Gave me a mediocre performance, like your talents, right?
I think someone’s just mad that they never got a Valentine!
The raps you spit are more deformed than your face, Jason
Your whole series should’ve been left on that space station!
Samara Morgan’s brother acting like he’ll murder me
But one shot of water and mommy’s all that he’s murmuring!

Jason Voorhees:
Talk like you’re from the Killer Crapper, ‘cause you’re complete shit
Take your words and make like your mining friends; eat it!
I’ve turned mortals to Ash bud, you’re like my day; bad luck
And I’m dropping the Axel, 'cause your trash films don’t stand up!

Harry Warden:
You’ve dug your own grave with your sequels, the truth is;
Gratuitous nudity’s all that let your reboot live.
Since Jason went to hell, his fans had their hearts carved out
So it seems I’ll get the last laugh. Go ahead and eat your heart out!

CREDITS

Light as Jason Voorhees
https://soundcloud.com/ducky808
DeegleNV as Harry Warden
https://soundcloud.com/deeglenv

Beat by Hala-X
Written by Rabi, B O R K, and Dani Frias
https://soundcloud.com/borkrulesok
https://soundcloud.com/dannyplaysgames-422800890
Mixed by Rabi and Light
Thumbnail by JordanSnowish
https://soundcloud.com/jordydydy

Jason Voorhees vs. Harry Warden - Rap Battle

Plankton's Experiment : The Monarchy
Squidward's Suicide : Jose

Written by Kamren
Beat : https://drive.google.com/file/d/144fEa5wotGUJpfbpX_hUv3gQJ09Bg1jJ/view?usp=drivesdk
Beat Prod. : Hollywood Legend
Mixed by : Jordan
Cover art by AaronGPeters
Special Thanks to Dustin and Jade!

[0:25]
Squidward's Suicide :
So they revived me just to be put against an episode so shallow?
Since you're just another crappy-pasta that I'll crush beneath my shadow
The voices tell me to do many things, but read your story? Not one of them!
I mean, just look at the Wattpad page! You're just One Course Meal, chum
Musical notes are my formula! The one you should have killed over
Then again, I would have replaced it like Jade when she tossed you over
To the trash can where you belong, don't you realize it yet?
I'm the whole reason for you even being created on the web!

[0:51]
Plankton's Experiment :
Haven't gotten halfway, yet this experiment has already proved pointless 
Since there are better tales of horror coming from suicidal rodents
Had your chance at the Super Bowl, then Sicko Mode got in the way
Now you mope on your bed, screaming "KAREN TOOK MY HAPPINESS AWAY!"
The crowd booed you off the stage, but I didn’t know your plays could get worse
Remind me who ruined Bikini Bottom, cuz it sure wasn’t fucking Squidward!
Here I thought my traps were rich, but your cameo was only for clicks
Then ended transparent as Red Mists, showing off some dead kids.

[1:16]
Squidward's Suicide :
Plankton mad he's getting served? You ain't Hillenburg, so hush
But what can I say? You're already used to being rushed!

[1:23]
Plankton's Experiment :
My story was a masterpiece! Yours is forgotten each and every day
So make yourself useful for once, take that gun and blow out your brains!
Quit the hyper realism, I only need one eye to creep the masses

[1:32]
Squidward's Suicide :
You don't even have a leg to stand on! Something you have less than Patrick
I JUST CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE, HAVE FUN WITH THE POLICE!! 

[1:39]
Plankton's Experiment :
Drawing this battle to a close, here lies Squiddy's Hopes and Dreams....

Plankton's Experiment vs Squidward's Suicide - Rap Battle! (ft. Jose & The Monarchy)

-CAST-
Vladimyr P, Dani Frias, Raichous, Alex the Beast, GamingPlush64, Michael / Stark Media and underscores as Zalgo
[REDACTED] as Cthulhu

-WRITERS-
[REDACTED], Michael / Stark Media, and [REDACTED]

-PRODUCTION-
Thumbnail by: Vladimyr P. and Michael / Stark Media
Beat By Dansonn
Mixing by Vladimyr P.

-LYRICS-
ANNOUNCER
Welcome, weary traveler, to Ciphers of the Unknown
Today's matchup is: Zalgo
And
Cthulhu
Commence!

Zalgo  (0:31 - 1:17):
Your cult rooms will be filled with gore as HE COMES to leave his mark
On this hentai monster who’s become nothing but joke fuel for South Park
Looking Sad, Satan? I've been waiting a century for you to spit a good rap
What kind of Dark Lord gets squashed by a sword that shoots out kitty cats?!
Read the text, squidward. my plague starts to spread ‘cross the land
That wipes out this gimmick with relevance more dead than the star that’s in my hand
Please! My candle’s light outshines all that you can spit in this
Kelly’s carnage incarnate’s bars leave squids sleeping with the fishes!
You’re no Necronom-icon! Forgotten when ‘zilla hits the stage!
Telling me you got into politics? (Heh) I’d rather vote for Kanye!
Best go back to startling gamers, for ZALGO is 7 times the rapper
This little munchkin’s been tarnished and now we can start the next chapter..

Cthulhu (1:17 - 2:17):
Zalgo claims to be a god, but he’s barely short of the Funnies
But even when this comic’s stripped down, Zalgo’s just a pitiful plaything for kiddies
So fear the Call of Cthulhu, the true Lovecraftian creation
You’re an outdated fad meme, rejected by the SCP Foundation
This Deviant’s Art is tasteless! Creepypasta crap, nothing new  
You have a song? Do you hold hands and prance around with infants too?
And the ear rape? Glitched font? That’s your method of inflicting pain?
Being eyeless won’t help you, just hearing me will make you go insane!
Your lyrics are unspeakable; but when it comes to stories I’m the pinnacle; invincible
But your chance of winning is like your reality status to your creator: fictional
Like you said I have cult followers, what do you have? Children who think you’re scary?
Just check Behind The Wall and see it’s me who’s taking the victory!
Seven goddamn mouths, you’d think at least one would try to win
It’s quite un-4chan-ate, but I’ll still be leaving this flightless Bird Boxed in
(Yelling) I AM THE EMBODIMENT OF CHAOS, BUT IF HE’S INSISTENT ON PERSISTENCE
I’LL CONTROL HIM, ALTERNATE HIS LIFE, AND DELETE HIM FROM EXISTENCE

Zalgo (2:17 - 2:25):
That’s enough from the kraken, thought I told you to shut it
This is boring me, perhaps you’d rather face off with one of my puppets

Zalgo as Garfield (2:25 - 2:40):
(Yawn) What’s this? Looks like Jon tried making calamari
But I’ll kick him off the track like Odie, and this time, I’m not sorry
Z͜͡͡AL͟͡G҉́Ò '͢͞S͟ ̀͡A͝͡R͠R̷̛IV̢̛E҉͞D̡ ͞A̸̶Ń̢D̴̵ ̀I̡T͏͠' ͠҉͡S̶ ͏U̷N̸͏̢W̷̴̡IS͜É ̀T̷̷͞O̧ ̧̀T͟͏͝H͝͏I͞N҉K͟҉ ͟͞T͘͞HA̛T͜͟ Ý̢OU҉̶ ̵̡̛C̷̨͝AN̡͢ ҉̡̕D͘͞E̶FE҉A̧͜T HI͡M͡
C̷͠͏A̢͜ŲS̡͘È H̀͢E͟ '͜҉̨ĹL̵͘ ̀C̵OR̛̕R̵͘Ù́̀P̷T҉ ̡YǪ͠U̶͘R̴̨͢ ̛́M̷ED͏̷̀I҉̡A͞,̸ ̶̧LE͏A̸͞V̛I̛͞͠N̸Ģ̧̡ ͝Y̶O͠͝U͘R ̢̨͞P͠A̸̡T͢H͝E̡T̨Ì͜C̶̵ ͠B̷ǪOK҉̕S͜͝ ̵͡T̵O̵̢R̀N̡ ̵T̕O ͢͝PI̴E̴͏C̀E̕S̡

Zalgo (2:40 - 2:47):
What a Weird Tale that you’ve woven, saying that you’re superior to me
It’s Something Awful really, but now I’ve finally put an end to your series


Cthulhu (2:47 - 3:03):
Putting on a Puppet show to fight your battles for you? It’s honestly such a Loss
So Dream No More, this is the one and only time that our paths will cross
It’s time I return to my realm and leave this simple post archived, dismissed
They say “Zalgo’s coming”, but even after this I’m still waiting for a good diss... (Malevolently Chuckles)

ANNOUNCER
Who Cracked the Case?
Who Should Cypher Next?
Comment Down Below
And prepare yourselves for the next
Ciphers of The Unknown

Zalgo vs Cthulhu | Ciphers of the Unknown

In the first episode of Half-Ass Rap Battles (the bonus spin-off of Lame-Ass Rap Battles) we have a pizza slice against a hamburger because why not, I had fun with it.

Written by Commander Jacob
Freshy Kanal as Pizza
Commander Jacob as Hamburger
Mixed by Freshy Kanal
Prod. by 2Deep

Pizza:
Come out the oven deep-dish when I got to rap a line
Cause you got no flavor like the fries you come with half the time
Reppin’ Italy critically. All your mascots disturbin’ me
I’ll have you drop in the ER, get your ass back to Germany
I have enough cheese. Get a taste, mate. Cream you, but don’t wanna taste mayonnaise
Rhymin’ supreme. Steppin’ to me and I’m havin’ ya bleed. Getting ketchup to spray, k?
Whatchu got, lettuce? Broseph, ya never toppin’ me
Go ahead and slice me up, that just means more people chompin’ me

Burger:
Hey, I placed an order, but it came with too much cheese, bruh 
I’ll need an extra-hot verse, I got a pizza to heat up
No way you can fuck with me. I out-pizza the hut, ya see?
If you wanna rat me out, I’ll send you back to Chuck E. Cheese
Got a red dot on you like a pepperoni, homie
Ordering pineapple’s the only way you be spittin’ grossly
Give ya girl my meat and make some bread. I’m a phenomenon
With you I’m intolerant, but no way more than Papa John

Pizza vs Burger | Half-Ass Rap Battle #1

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another Half-Ass Rap Battle! Today we have a battle of minimal, pixelated games typically played out of boredom: Flappy Bird vs Chrome T-Rex. Enjoy!

Commander Jacob as Flappy Bird
Deegle as Chrome T-Rex
Written by Commander Jacob
Mixed by Light
Prod. by 2Deep

I’m coming back, the flyest bird. It’s undebated
To face an old fart that Atari would call outdated
Pterodactyl when I battle. So buddy, you oughta let go
People play you when they say “dammit, I guess so”
Takes a tap to flap over the crap that you spat out
Your life’ll fade to black quicker than your background
Mainstream? No way. Gameplay? so lame
So you should look up better rhymes… oh wait

An amputee duck with plastic surgery
Seems to struggle connecting to a beat to try to murder me
Grab your over-priced iPads and take a walk, dude
You’re smokin’ stolen pipes thinking Nintendo won’t stomp you
I’m Chrome polished. My desert’s less dry than what you’ve written, kid
I'm jumping over cacti, I can handle one little prick
What got removed faster, you from all the phones I can see
Or was it your creator, exiled from society?

Flappy Bird vs Chrome T-Rex | Half-Ass Rap Battle #2

Welcome back to Half-Ass Rap Battles! Today we have the monochrome LCD character against the monochrome LSD character; Mr. Game & Watch vs Grey Man. Enjoy!

Raichous as Mr. Game & Watch
Mr. Tibbs (Gridline Studios) as Grey Man

Written by Commander Jacob w/ help from Zawesome
Mixed by Light
Prod. by Marsad Men

-LYRICS-

Game & Watch:
Parachute in to win, it’s an icon you’re fighting, man
This Fire man throws bacon, eggs, and fine raps off a frying pan
Been Ball-ing from the start. Where’ve you been? I can’t tell
As an expert, I can say fame’s something you’ve never handheld
This rapping trampoline lander’s smacking you like a 9 hammer
And your win’s a crazier dream than those of all your programmers
Slenderman in a trench coat? He only has one mode: stalk
Mister, watching your game has got me watching my own clock

Grey Man:
A fat-nosed shadow thinks that he's fit for battle? Boy I'll laugh
When I have him tripping and he still tries to fight with oil cans 
Ring your bell for help! I’m Krueger of the PlayStation
Leaving beats and dreams corrupted. Still think it's an emulation?
Here’s the red Flagman; you’ll get slaughtered just from napping
It’s one of your two functions; learn it’s time to stop rapping
I Violently Diss-strict. The pain won’t leave when you wake up.
Even people who play Smash have forgotten you like a brain flush

Mr. Game & Watch vs Grey Man | Half-Ass Rap Battle #3

VinnyO as Light
Freshy Kanal as Eggman
Extra Instruments by VinnyO and Freshy Kanal
Mix by Freshy Kanal

Light:
Take a look at yourself - you're a rotten apple, both in and out you're just revolting
Building machines that instantly get destroyed - leaving Eggman nuts and bolting
I’m one for cancelling announcements, I see with no need for shinigami eyes that
For an Eggman with a so-called master plan, you're more of a walrus with a short lifespan
My plans fell into place like your rip-off of Tetris 
I'm a king, I’m a god, you're a schmuck, don't you get this?
You build bots since you're more friendless than Memphis 
I smite every chump whose name's writ on my checklist
Is it Ivo Robotnik, Kobintor, or Eggman? PICK ONE ALREADY! What the hell do I write?
Close your eyes, in the sequel it seems that you won’t be seeing the Light
  
Eggman:
Snooping as usual ? You fool! You will never know my name!
You’re only a god of the Lost World, but I’ve Advanced on the track, so this is no game
Your pad and pen tricked you to demonize, 
and you’re left obsessed with your demon eyes
Live action films were your deemed demise 
But they franchised mine as my dreams arised
How blinded have you gotten--it’s clear your shinigami is da foe
I thought that it would be clear only a psychopath would dare to use Light mode
Go run back to your Amy Rose, no queen can check this game to close
I have a -- Death Note to make: You have to grim reap what you sow!

Light Yagami vs Doctor Eggman. Battle Bytes #34

Mancha as Taako
Hippie Rat as Guy Fieri / Announcer

It’s time to Sizzle It Up on the quest to find the best Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives! Wash your hands! Preheat your ovens! Rev up those fryers! It’s Taako vs Guy Fieri in...The Rap Battle Zone!

Guy Fieri:
The prophecy said you’d be saved, by the man who’s wreathed in flames,
But this is one Fiery Guy who won’t be doing the same!
I’m a burly sirloin, you’re built like a wet noodle
I advocate the working man, you’re more chaotic neutral.
So here's a Plane of Thought you can season with Worst-erch-ire
Alice Through the Frying Pan; you fell into the fire
Can't even make your namesake, stuck with a d6 of health
Never thought I'd see you calling for Genji to heal yourself!
You went to Garfield, done paid for one case of the Mondays
Won an all-you-can eat plate for the whole Jimmy Buffet!
“The garlic really complements the arsenic,” they said.
And then they graded you a Z, or should I...say zed!

Taako:
Taako’s good out here! I think you’ll enjoy the view
Let me work my magic [beat] Abraca-fuck-you!
You’re barbaric and garish! My Guy, what are you wearing?
You look like Smash Mouth went and gone all Super Saiyan!
It’s tragic, your diss’ll miss, I spit accurate Magic Missiles
But when you erratically spit arrhythmatic, you’ll fizzle
Don’t try to chew me out like you’re snacking on slabs of gristle
It’s apparent on your shirt I turned my clapbacks up to “sizzle”
And so now I debase myself, appearing here amid this meme
Who’s loading up on carbohydrates like a Food Pyramid scheme
Drive-ins, Dives, and Diners?! Ha! I hardly know her!
Oh and, Guy, your Donkey Sauce tastes like Go-Gurt.

Guy Fieri:
The true worth of man are the values that they’re driven by.
I made a great tendie tienda, but you’re the true Chicken Guy!
You may think it's swell to get your Taco Loaded in hell
Bro, you sold your own soul out... Animus Taako Bell!
I would spit it like Minute to Win It, hit it and rip into your tunic
But I should limit this minigame skit before you’re squished by an air conditioning unit.
What’s your “Kiss the Cook” apron to the flame decals I’m rocking on?
For a token gay you’d think you’d get your token in the gashapon

Taako:
Fuck yeah, Guy’s Grocery Gay plays loud and proud, hombre! 
You serve me a plate, I’m rolling constitution saves!
While Taako conjures up a lunch like “I wanna munch!” (Squad!)
Even my Grand Relic is the tastiest of the bunch!
I’d say maybe Ren’s the only being that can outdo me,
But we’ll keep that between You, Me, AND DUPREE!!!
You and I got a date with Death -- like your food, we’re heart stopping!
Taako’s Supreme! Call me sour cream, cuz I’m topping!

The Rap Battle Zone

Taako vs Guy Fieri. The Rap Battle Zone #1

Welcome back to Half-Ass Rap Battles! Today we have a battle of the edgy spooky versions of characters, one ironic, one unironic: Sonic.EXE vs Corrupted Jacob

-LYRICS-

Sonic.EXE
(Yo) ever since Things That Aren't That Scary Month, I know you've been hating, my guy
So many souls, so Slowpoke.EXE should quit wasting my time
You’re like Tom with my CD; too pussy to destroy a track, dog
Lyrics coming at you at Super Sonic speed: I am Rap God
Too tapped out for round 2. Searched your Commander’s channel, even I never Found You
Cameos are all you amount to. I got a jester's laugh, and I’m still bout to clown you
When I’m rappin, I go batshit. I’m attacking with some hacking. I’m the spin-dashing classic
This wack-ass damn kid’s the static cross-breed fanfic of Darkiplier and a sad squid, that’s it

Corrupted Jacob:
Zalgo in a fursuit? Oh no, my wee little heart!
Ya meant to be creepy, but spawned extremely… DeviantArt 
Like Sally Simp, you’re gonna get left in stitches when fighting me
Your fame was as short as your face in your own fucking title screen
Fucking cheesy ass. Your game got me board as shit, you damn Rap Rat
Check the anger and the eyeballs; my dude needs a pack of Tampax 
Trolled this pasta back to his wiki, too lame for me to eat ya
Haven’t seen someone as bad with words since JC the Hyena

Alex the Beast as Sonic.EXE
Commander Jacob as Corrupted Jacob
Written by Commander Jacob w/ help from TimeLord
Edited and thumbnailed by Commander Jacob
Mixed by Light
Prod. by Retnik

Sonic.EXE vs Corrupted Jacob | Half-Ass Rap Battles

Oh yeah we going to space for this one
Mancha as Sinistar
King Mewtwo as Ego the Living Planet
Beat produced by Tristan on the Track
Thumbnail by Trakked
Mixed by Dani Frias 
Written by Trakked, Kamren, ColeDaCole and WDRB

Battle:

Sinistar:
Beware coward, this small villain will fall victim to my hunger 
I’ll throw Sini-bombs at this planetoid; lightyears asunder!
You better Run Run Run! Not even your Alter-Ego can stop me
For my Eternal power shall destroy this puny planet's Galaxy 
It’s a travesty that such a being couldn’t be a strong foe
Beat by a space pirate? That’s what I’d call a fragile Ego
You're a sick minded fraud, went out a Boomer like your status
Not even glitches could rebirth since you've already turned to ashes

Ego:
Tried to scare in the 80’s, yet even with that, computer,
You’re the “star” of a forgotten game; an unoriginal space shooter
If a spacecraft can beat you, then you’ll revel to my power,
Decimated into decimals, never played beyond an hour

Sinistar:
Beware, I live!; And you claim my game is infamous?
I may be the metal boss, but you’re sure picking up rust!
I’ll bust into your core, before you dare fathom to wreck this,
How come you try to take risks when I eat planets for breakfast? 

Ego:
You're just an underpowered entity, a frail-minded Galactus
So I'll trash this scrap metal; I could destroy you with magnets!
Barely shoddy, with my Anti-Bodies swarming 'round this virus,
Deleting all weak-shelled copies of this pathetic bot who’s mindless
Your claim to fame's only a game, while my legacy evolves
No glitches can save you, watch you while all of your lives dissolve
A win trapped in Imaginationland; this pathetic feud is over
And it concludes with me having this star meet a supernova

Sinistar vs Ego - Rap Cypher: REBOOT #12

This is a super passion-oriented project that has been in the works for literally nearly two months, so much so that I wasn't sure it'd release. Partially because I wanted to do these amazing games--especially Phasmophobia--justice, and had a very specific artistic vision that I wasn't sure if I could pull off effectively in the way I'd want.
I'm happy to say that this is finally out. Not to mention I am pretty damn proud of how it came out.
Special thanks to EVERYONE involved in this project. Y'all really carried this shit, not me. If it weren't for the help of amazing VAS, Jacob for the thumbnail and some early beta feedback-givers, this wouldn't be here in the state it is.
And thus, I give you my boldest project yet. Hope you guys like it. :)

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1HyPrmUdW_4P_gRTv5HOIBKNKqmRidNx9hWaWggp4-hA/edit?usp=sharing

Phasmophobia vs. Sign of Silence // Alex's Rap Battles #9

Hey folks, releasing this early as a little Christmas break gift cause I'm out of school now but don't expect the video for this until about the first half of January (if all goes well). Thank you and see y'all at our Christmas video (aka Project Michael). 

Ray Kroc: Snakebite126
Andrew Carnegie: Ethan Zagranis

Ray Kroc Verse 1
This is not the battle to compare whose wallet is the thickest.
In that interest, I’ve been beat, my bragging would be witless.
But in terms of riches, I got that corporate quickness and the slickness
To take-out all competition through this survival of the fittest!
So getting down to business, you’ve made medals, but I doubt tons
And it's not like you deserve them, is this a second fight you’ll buy out of?
While I'm feeding famished families, you're just a system leech
I'm executing an executive, dropping the AC, putting the I in Chief
You barely bottom feed, flooding people in a sea of debt, and yet 
I would bet, that dam gamble wouldn’t land at the top of your regrets
Speaking of gambles, The McDonalds House always wins, you're getting played
And now I'm steeling all your bases, there's no way you could play it safe

Andrew Carnegie Verse 1
That's enough, I'm not mustering trust for any guy,
With used car salesman wit, who believes his own lies.
You falsified your age because you wanted to save lives.
Then you let millions die tryna sell your greasy fries!
You want to compare our success? Son, I started from the bottom.
This greasy sleaze got to the top for free, and my work ethic’s the problem?
PLEASE! You can't bring the beef. After this, they'll use you as red meat.
So phony, you tried to run to your family like a trade, but ended up deadbeat.
The Kroc Pot took a shot at baseball and unshockingly struck out.
I can handle strikes, but strokes leave Ray in one more drunk bout.
Stick to clown college, but acknowledge, giving from your wallet is what life's for.
And kicking the poor out isn't worth doing just to have a polished floor.

Ray Kroc Verse 2
That's the problem, I'm tidy, you've got so much dirt, it's pathetic.
I know where my cash is headed, cause yours led straight into eugenics.
I meant it, I picked up your book, for just a second, I regretted it
Then took 10 steps towards the trash, it sent me 20 back when I read it
Your godforsaken gospel couldn't grasp my grand Golden Arches
You’re only striking workers, those aren’t steel bars, they’re harmless
You have to buy charisma, I convinced Disney to be a taste tester
And I’ll rock a feller and push a cardboard in-vestor back to sender
You fired Frick because he could've run your business without you
But I know food better than you do, and your lifes not market value
For all of your money you waste, you won't even bother to pay space?
Confining kids, seems you let yourself have the better "playplace".

Andrew Carnegie Verse 2
This robber baron will turn this robber barren for sure
The jokes mass produce themselves, you’re the first Hamburglar
I'm paying in this war, ‘gainst a man who wages less than his workers
Let Nixon listen in and he'll hear me give just desserts to a deserter
Even in death, you regardless put beef in every vegans burger
Your slaughterhouse is aptly name, this meet most certainly is murder
And further, this "Mac Daddy" was bit by Jobs, even stole from the Rich
So shit, take my 5 cents, and mind your own goddamn business.
I've got libraries across the world but this imperialist lacks a spine 
Small fry, your casualty's one for the books when it comes to cutting lines
I've earned the success you've coveted, your shady practices? I'm above this
So the stock you had in this match plummeted, and well... I'm loving it

Ray Kroc vs Andrew Carnegie - Discord Rap Battles

Adam from Uberocity as Rocky Balboa
www.youtube.com/user/UberFictionBattles

Vladimyr P. as Daniel LuRusso
www.youtube.com/channel/UC1RdxEDNIuMIZk0VLjSdVrQ

Written by Creep Switch and Jason Carreon
www.youtube.com/channel/UCJqI4S81e6zRSyr2vVlY_kA

Thumbnail by Zagranis
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZ_i39lDeaZp3XJwuf8u7AA

Mixed and Mastered by Freshy Kanal
www.youtube.com/channel/UCNLjRiychUaaCU0uJTYDUYA

Beat by Audio Network

Rocky:
You jumped the gun kid, now you'll get jumped on this track
But there's no old man to save ya, so I'll play as your dad
Boxing is more an art to me than martial arts is to you
I went distance you only fought kids who screwed with you
So how was it that your remake became a blockbust
Now you can barely bare a fight, I’m gonna knock ya socks off
And I will never stop shop so if you wanna box box
I'll still hold it to ya, and you can say..."honk honk"

Daniel:
He wrote his watered down flick and now he's all cocky smart
I thought your ending was cheesy, but you had a rocky start
I didn't come here for a lecture with the way you slur words
Got knocked in the head so many times, based on flipping your birds
Pushed love as a win, and I get that you're a Stallion
But your wife is a horse! And you need titles to balance it
No wonder your nose never broke, you're a nosy foe with dopey flow
Just like your son getting accused of selling and holding dope

Rocky:
How's this jack-off gonna rap off when his master's a drunk whack job
Based on how you polished your bars you did Wax Off...Wax Off
I like throwing roasts at you, you're a turkey who likes to squawk
Buts what's that mean when you're the biggest sociopath on the block
You can't block this, Yo Daniel!, stay down or get rolled
No skeleton costume needed to say that you're boned
You need to fix your sham Daniel this is still a rap battle
I've seen better kicks from Damn Daniel
A celebrity boosted me, and we know ya ain't the same
When Smith and Justin played the bully and tarnished your name
When you flow in your shtick you make a fun shower stud
But you only learn through child labor so wash the blood off my gloves

Daniel:
Rambo ran out of his ammo, the shots you're taking are ass bro
Makes sense when you couldn't make cents from G.I. Joe, Hasbro!
You've underestimated me again, you ran but you can't touch me man
So train your jab, when became Mr.T's punching bag
You're slower than both your turtles, but hey, you must be glad
You had so much plot armour you could've kept playing dad
You're a creep-o, see, I'll put you on ice molester loner
He so acted like he owned her, sounding like a Sylvester Stoner
Breaking moral codes left and right, acting like a bogus guy
You lie and hurt yourself so much, you became your own Cobra Kai
You're slipping on Creeds ropes, I know you're hurting with these verses
Let me pick this jacket back up, unlike the people you first pitched

Rocky Balboa Vs Daniel LaRusso (Karate Kid) - Rewind Rap Rumble!

Home of Lame-Ass Rap Battles, its side series Half-Ass Rap Battles, and maybe the occasional cover of someone else's battle.

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