This week we talk about Tim's trip to the horse track, which did not go well for him. Things go a little off the rails when we discuss the lineage of certain horses and what constitutes a "good horse." There's also a lot of talk about drinking smoothies, buying life-sized wax figures of George Clooney and opening a dangerous amusement park, as well as a staggering amount of product placement. 

In a brand new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems, we tackle a young man's question about an uncle who steals his cigarettes.

This episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and an audiobook of your choice by going to tcgte.com/audible.

Horse Racing

This week, Tim tries to rebrand the podcast as a resource for consumers to compare products, beginning with fitness trackers in this episode. Tom doesn't seem all that interested in this plan and spends more time thinking about they lyrics of Stevie Wonder songs. Also, Tim is ready to leave New York City for good because his car was towed.

This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and an audiobook download of your choice by going to tcgte.com/audible.

Fitness Trackers

It’s Tim and Tom Talkin’ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! Except neither of them has seen the new movie, so mostly it’s just talking about the old movies, TV shows, video games, action figures, comic books, ice pops, pizza, etc. Also, Tim reveals what he played with as a child instead of action figures like a regular kid!

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

If there’s an emergency, are you prepared? You are if you have THIS episode. Tim and Tom discuss all the things you need to have in case of an emergency, like a hand crank radio, dehydrated food and constant entertainment.

This week we also introduce a new segment called “Taking Care of Business” and solve a listener problem relating to Facebook birthday blues.

This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trail and an audiobook download of your choice by going to tcgte.com/audible.

Emergency Preparedness

If you're a person that uses the internet (and we suspect that you are), then one thing is for certain: you can't get enough MEMES!!!! In an episode we can't believe we haven't done in the past, Tom explains some of the most popular internet memes to a skeptical Tim. Naturally, this is followed by a fair amount of confusion, as well as a discussion of presidential hamburger-eating habits.

But first, we talk about how we're celebrating Labor Day 2014 and give a definitive answer to a classic airplane etiquette question. And in a new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems, we help out a guy who needs to choose between romancing a bunch of girls over the internet or saying with one girl in real life. 

This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trail and an audiobook download of your choice by going to tcgte.com/audible.

Memes

Cronuts, ramen burgers, gourmet chicken nuggets, who can keep track of all of these new trendy foods that you have to wait in line for hours and hours to acquire? We can, despite not having eaten many of the items. This week we run down the list of the hottest food trends in New York City and tell you why they’re stupid.

Also, Tim and Tom solve a problem regarding a marriage proposal at a concert.

This week's episode is brought to you by Audible. Get a free 30 day trail and an audiobook download of your choice by going to tcgte.com/audible.

NYC Trendy Food

Can you believe in all this time we’ve never actually done a Black Friday episode? Neither could we, so we decided to correct. A full hour of us complaining about consumerism AND talking about finding great deals! To honor our dear friend Casey and support those struggling with medical debt, you can kindly donate at <a href="http://tcgte.com/donate" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">tcgte.com/donate</a> For weekly episodes of Books: The Podcast and much, much more check out the TCGTE Patreon!Like the show? Rate The Complete Guide to Everything 5-Stars on Apple Podcasts and let us know what topic they should check out next.Follow Tim on Twitter: @yourpaltim and Instagram: @yourpaltimFollow Tom on Twitter: @tomreynolds and Instagram: @tomreynoldsAdvertise on The Complete Guide to Everything via Gumball.fm This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/COMPLETEGUIDE and get on your way to being your best self.See Privacy Policy at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy</a> and California Privacy Notice at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info</a>.

Black Friday

We recorded this episode during a holiday week and didn't feel like doing our usual rigorous research, so instead we've brought back an old segment -- The Gauntlet! We asked our Patreon supporters for topic ideas, and in this episode we're going through them and deciding which will be future episodes and which ones will go to hell. See Privacy Policy at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy</a> and California Privacy Notice at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info</a>.

The Gauntlet

This week we’re talking about everyone’s favorite toaster pastry from Kellanova Industries: Pop-Tarts. Which flavors are the best? Are they really inferior to Pillsbury Toaster Strudels? (Yes.) Also, Henry Kissinger dies in the middle of recording. For weekly episodes of Books: The Podcast and much, much more check out the <a href="https://patreon.com/completeguide" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">TCGTE Patreon!</a>Like the show? <a href="https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-complete-guide-to-everything/id119832920" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Rate The Complete Guide to Everything 5-Stars on Apple Podcasts</a> and let us know what topic they should check out next.Follow Tim on Twitter: <a href="https://twitter.com/yourpaltim" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@yourpaltim</a> and Instagram: <a href="https://instagram.com/yourpaltim" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@yourpaltim</a>Follow Tom on Twitter: <a href="https://twitter.com/tomreynolds" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@tomreynolds</a> and Instagram: <a href="https://www.instagram.com/tomreynolds/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@tomreynolds</a>Advertise on <a href="https://gumball.fm/shows/the-complete-guide-to-everything/5a592688b73aeb30532c6b51" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">The Complete Guide to Everything</a> via <a href="http://Gumball.fm" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Gumball.fm</a>See Privacy Policy at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy</a> and California Privacy Notice at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info</a>.

Pop-Tarts

If you need to buy a gift for a child this holiday season, allow us to give you the lowdown on this year's hottest toys and point you in the right direction. If you buy them every toy we talk about, they're guaranteed to love and respect you for the rest of their lives.See Privacy Policy at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy</a> and California Privacy Notice at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info</a>.

Top Toys of 2023

’Tis the season, so this week we’re talking about the top Christmas songs of all time. We also find out that Thanksgiving songs exist and that Christmas song trivia is kinda boring. But before anything else, Tom has a very important hypothetical situation for Tim. For weekly episodes of Books: The Podcast and much, much more check out the <a href="https://patreon.com/completeguide" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">TCGTE Patreon!</a>Like the show? <a href="https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-complete-guide-to-everything/id119832920" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Rate The Complete Guide to Everything 5-Stars on Apple Podcasts</a> and let us know what topic they should check out next.Follow Tim on Twitter: <a href="https://twitter.com/yourpaltim" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@yourpaltim</a> and Instagram: <a href="https://instagram.com/yourpaltim" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@yourpaltim</a>Follow Tom on Twitter: <a href="https://twitter.com/tomreynolds" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@tomreynolds</a> and Instagram: <a href="https://www.instagram.com/tomreynolds/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@tomreynolds</a>Advertise on <a href="https://gumball.fm/shows/the-complete-guide-to-everything/5a592688b73aeb30532c6b51" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">The Complete Guide to Everything</a> via <a href="http://Gumball.fm" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Gumball.fm</a> This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/COMPLETEGUIDE&nbsp;and get on your way to being your best self.See Privacy Policy at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy</a> and California Privacy Notice at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info</a>.

Christmas Songs

It's another holiday week, so we're doing another very special (and very low-lift) Gauntlet episode. What's that, you ask? We asked our Patreon supporters for topic ideas, and in this episode we're once again going through them and deciding which will be future episodes and which ones will go to hell. Merry Christmas.See Privacy Policy at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy</a> and California Privacy Notice at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info</a>.

Another Gauntlet

Well, it's time to wave goodbye to 2023 and then turn around and wave hello to 2024. This week we take a look back at 2023, but instead of talking about any of the bad stuff that's happened we mostly just talk about Taylor Swift. For weekly episodes of Books: The Podcast and much, much more check out the <a href="https://patreon.com/completeguide" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">TCGTE Patreon!</a>Like the show? <a href="https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-complete-guide-to-everything/id119832920" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Rate The Complete Guide to Everything 5-Stars on Apple Podcasts</a> and let us know what topic they should check out next.Follow Tim on Twitter: <a href="https://twitter.com/yourpaltim" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@yourpaltim</a> and Instagram: <a href="https://instagram.com/yourpaltim" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@yourpaltim</a>Follow Tom on Twitter: <a href="https://twitter.com/tomreynolds" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@tomreynolds</a> and Instagram: <a href="https://www.instagram.com/tomreynolds/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@tomreynolds</a>Advertise on <a href="https://gumball.fm/shows/the-complete-guide-to-everything/5a592688b73aeb30532c6b51" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">The Complete Guide to Everything</a> via <a href="http://Gumball.fm" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Gumball.fm</a>See Privacy Policy at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy</a> and California Privacy Notice at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info</a>.

2023 Year in Review

One of the world's wealthiest and most beloved rodents is in the news this week, as Mickey Mouse's first short Steamboat Willie entered the public domain. What does that mean, and more importantly, what is Mickey's whole deal? We discuss and debate these important topics on a very special episode of The Complete Guide To Everything.See Privacy Policy at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy</a> and California Privacy Notice at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info</a>.

Mickey Mouse

The 2024 Consumer Electronics Show was this week and we’re discussing all the latest gadgets and gizmos that have been introduced, including a surprising number of urine-related gadgets. For weekly episodes of Books: The Podcast and much, much more check out the <a href="https://patreon.com/completeguide" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">TCGTE Patreon!</a>Like the show? <a href="https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-complete-guide-to-everything/id119832920" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Rate The Complete Guide to Everything 5-Stars on Apple Podcasts</a> and let us know what topic they should check out next.Follow Tim on Twitter: <a href="https://twitter.com/yourpaltim" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@yourpaltim</a> and Instagram: <a href="https://instagram.com/yourpaltim" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@yourpaltim</a>Follow Tom on Twitter: <a href="https://twitter.com/tomreynolds" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@tomreynolds</a> and Instagram: <a href="https://www.instagram.com/tomreynolds/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">@tomreynolds</a>Advertise on <a href="https://gumball.fm/shows/the-complete-guide-to-everything/5a592688b73aeb30532c6b51" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">The Complete Guide to Everything</a> via <a href="http://Gumball.fm" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Gumball.fm</a>See Privacy Policy at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy</a> and California Privacy Notice at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info</a>.

Consumer Electronics Show (CES) 2024

Have you heard about the water cup that everyone is losing their minds over? It's called the Stanley Cup, but it has nothing to do with hockey, and if you drink water out of anything else you're a dumb loser. This week dig deep into the Stanley Cup, Tim gets into a band 30 years too late, and Tom apparently has a new podcast.See Privacy Policy at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy</a> and California Privacy Notice at <a href="https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info</a>.

Stanley Cup

This week we're talking Halloween parties. What to eat at 'em, what games to play, costumes to wear, you name it. If it's something you can or should do at a Halloween party, we're talking about it this week.

We also solve a listener problem concerning what to do when you receive a gigantic framed print as a gift and don't want to put it up in your house.

Halloween Parties

The toy-giving season is coming up, and this week we're talking about the mother of all toy stores: Toys R Us. We talk about how difficult it was to get there as a child, the horrible idea of letting kids "test" toys while making their wish lists, the logistics of buying a video game as a child and FAO Shwarz, the high end toy store recently bought by Toys R Us. 

Also Tim has a foul smelling misadventure on the bus, Tom has some internet problems and we solve a problem about smoking cigarettes.

Hey, did you can support the show and get some cool rewards? Check it out at tcgte.com/pledge.

Support TCGTE

Toys R Us

It's Christmastime, so this week we're doing an episode about noted horror novelist Stephen King. This guy does it all: writes books, has movies made based on his books, produces miniseries based on the same books successful movies have already been based on, and predicts the future in the books written by his pseudonym.

Also, Tom gets a weird contraption for his back and we solve a problem from a listener who expects us to figure out his whole life for him.

Stephen King

This week Tom joins a gym and has some very big plans for how the rest of his life will play out. Also, Tim is afraid of teens he sees on the bus. And in a new installment of Tim & Tom Solve Your Problems we solve a problem from a listener whose parents are potentially stealing his hard earned money.

This week's episode is sponsored by Audible. Get a free 30 day trial and an audiobook download of your choice by going to audiblepodcast.com/everything.

Joining A Gym

This week's episode is about a chain of coffee shops that also sells easy listening music and always has a bathroom for you to use when you need one.

Also this week: Tim has some ideas for spoons, we salute the hard work done by bookies everywhere, and we solve a problem from a listener about her dogs.

Hey New York City! We're doing a show in Brooklyn on 4/10 at Union Hall. We have to keep the topic secret because we're afraid to announce it publicly, but we promise it'll be worth your while. Get tickets at tcgte.com/live.

Starbucks

This week we’re talking cars of the future, like Tesla, Google’s Self-Driving Car, Hyperloop, Apple’s Car and more. Also this week we hear about how Tom fell down in the street along with the riveting tale of how Timmy Baloneyskins became Timmy Meatballs.

Hey New York City! We're doing a show in Brooklyn on 4/10 at Union Hall. We have to keep the topic secret because we're afraid to announce it publicly, but we promise it'll be worth your while. Get tickets at tcgte.com/live.

This week’s episode is sponsored by Loot Crate. They’ll deliver you a monthly box with 6-8 cool items like vinyl figurines, comics, shirts, and more - and each month has a theme. Go tolootcrate.com/EVERYTHING and enter code EVERYTHING to save $3 on any new subscription!

Live Shows

Cars Of The Future!

It's Foo Fighters week on The Complete Guide to Everything. That's because Tim and Tom saw the Foo Fighters last week at Citi Field. This week we talk all about Foo Fighters, the basis for Tim and Tom's original friendship in the 1990's. We also go through each album, naming the best, worst and sleeper hits of each until we get to the albums where we don't recognize any songs any more.

Brought to you by Sidekick by Hubspot. With Sidekick, you can have powerful contact insight right in your inbox. Seamlessly integrated email tools for Gmail, Apple Mail, and Outlook to receive live notifications when someone opens and clicks on your emails. Go to getsidekick.com/everything to get your first month of Sidekick for free.

Foo Fighters

Public Relations is a hard job. This week we talk about the PR efforts behind a new TV show (Tom was invited to a fancy premiere party), Adele’s new album and Justin Beaver: The Dancing Boy.

We also solve a problem that is super ridiculous.

HEY NEW YORK! Come to our live Holiday Spectacular at Union Hall in Brooklyn on December 4th. Get tickets at tcgte.com/live.

Public Relations

This week we talk about that thing people in suits do with a microphone in front of a brick wall: stand-up comedy. Things get a little heated when we go through a strange list of best-ever comedians from 2005. Also, Tom tries to start a feud with an actor that nobody has ever heard of.

Stand - Up Comedy

This week, we have a brand new installment in our TCGTE Myths and Legends series. We talk about the infamous goat sucker, the chupacabra and uncover some truly alarming facts. Also, Tim has some stories about riding the bus and we solve problems from a lady looking for love and a child politician.

The Chupacabra

From My So-Called Life to Suicide Squad we’ve watch Jared Leto grow from a handsome boy to a handsome man who still looks like a boy. Whether he’s gaining a lot of weight or losing a lot of weight he sure can act. This week we’re talking all about him and his method acting and his band that all the kids seem to love, 30 Seconds to Mars.

Blue Apron knows that when you cook with incredible ingredients, you make incredible meals, so they set the highest quality standards for their community of artisanal suppliers, family-run farms, fisheries and ranchers.  Whether it’s Japanese ramen noodles, wild-caught Alaskan salmon or heirloom tomatoes, Blue Apron is bringing you the best. 
Check out this week’s menu and get your first THREE meals FREE—WITH FREE SHIPPING—by going to blueapron.com/GUIDE

Jared Leto

This week we talk about Burger King, an episode we were shocked we haven't done before. Obviously there's a lot of Whopper talk, but we also discuss some lesser-known menu items for all you fast food hipsters. Also, Tim wants to spy on a contractor and we solve a problem from someone who wants some driving tips.

Blue Apron knows that when you cook with incredible ingredients, you make incredible meals, so they set the highest quality standards for their community of artisanal suppliers, family-run farms, fisheries and ranchers.  Whether it’s Japanese ramen noodles, wild-caught Alaskan salmon or heirloom tomatoes, Blue Apron is bringing you the best. Check out this week’s menu and get your first THREE meals FREE—WITH FREE SHIPPING—by going to blueapron.com/GUIDE

Burger King

In this special episode of TCGTE, we order a Papa John’s pizza and eat it (off-mic at Tim’s insistence) to see if the quality really has dropped as much as noted racist Papa John claims. Also Tim is menaced by a squirrel and we solve a problem about snooping on your neighbors using LinkedIn.

Papa John

A how-to guide, also ideas for funny things to do to cavemen if you ever have the opportunity. 

Time Travel

In this special edition episode of The Complete Guide to Everything, Tim and Tom try to crack the case of the Backpack Bandit. Showing their ability to multitask and solve multiple cases at once, they then take on the case of the U-Haul Truck Trickster. Also Tim debuts his new podcast. This episode was recorded [...]

Sleuthing

A quick update on the trials and tribulations of Tom getting coffee, Tim discusses wasting his life away all because of Gordon Ramsay, a psychological exploration into the minds of patrons to restaraunts featured on Kitchen Nightmares. Also we talk about Freegans in our New York Times segment and we solve some problems with Facebook snooping.

Kitchen Nightmares

This week we recount the career of TLC, a debate about how difficult it is or isn't to burn down a mansion, Snoop Dogg getting a pass on being a sell-out, a debate on what car Derek Jeter drives, Nike's R&D department, and condiments & selfishness. After this intro we talk about The Avengers and Tom explains who Captain America, Iron Man, Hulk, Thor, Black Widow and Hawkeye are to Tim, plus we solve a problem with a roommate who eats too much.

The Avengers

This week Tim and Tom learn a lot about singing sensation Carly Rae Jepsen, discuss the attractiveness of some of the characters on the Jetsons, and Tom talks about an experience at the ballpark. Then they break down the last 20 years of summer songs and realize that they are two, sad, out of touch men. Enjoy!

Summer Music

Tom forgets the intro, we talk sweaters, cautious optimism for Girl Meets World, and an explanation of how terrible Tim and Tom were as teenagers before getting the main topic at hand: Moving. Tim and Tom discuss movers constantly dealing with the most stressed out people in the world, Tom's fascination with negative Yelp reviews for movers, movers nowadays all being skinny guys, Tim being duped into helping his movers move, counting money, and a barking dog problem is solved.

Moving (Part 1)

This week Tom receives more mail from the local cemetery and has a run-in with a conspiracy theorist on the subway, leading to a frank discussion about the Illuminati and immortality. Also Tim explains how he doesn't like people who love science, but wouldn't mind donating his body to it as long as he can make sure it isn't used to scare children after he's dead.

On the subject of McDonalds the guys discuss promotional menus, "eating" a milkshake, Grilled Onion Chedder burgers, Fish McBites, McRib, Shamrock Shake, the origins of the McRib, Hulu burgers and Tim's run in with his McDonalds employee crush from 15 years ago. Before they wrap up they also take a moment to solve a problem with a woman who doesn't want her boyfriend asking her parents to marry her.

McDonalds

This week we're putting out a live episode from our somewhat recent Europe tour. This is the first night in Manchester at The King's Arms. Included are some stories about us visiting an optical illusion museum in Edinburgh and almost missing our flight from Dublin because we're extremely out of shape. This episode also marks the first time Tim tries out some of his new topical political humor on a Manchester audience before we get into the real topic of the show: Conspiracy Theories. We manage to cover reptilian humanoids living amongst us, the connection between the JFK assassination and Billy Joel, as well as whether or not dinosaurs still live.

We also introduce a completely new audience participation segment called "Real Conspiracy Theory or Something Tom Made Up" and trot out an old favorite "The Mundane Bucket List". Before closing out this super-sized episode we also solve some audience problems concerning invisible bears and roommates who lie about attending university.

Videos referenced in this episode:

Shapeshifting Reptilian caught on camera during Antique Roadshow?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLe1jHjR58A

Dog Drives Power Wheel Car by Himself
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qh6vttHOzpA

REAL LIVE DINOSAUR footage CAUGHT ON TAPE!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kvmWOKMpFZ0

PTEROSAUR filmed in flight, Yantai City, Shandong Province, China.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W2s0U44Z3hg

Popular tracks by The Complete Guide to Everything