mga araw na gusto ko lumutang sa mundong puno ng problema

Hell yeah

you know i get scared sometimes

a collection of songs from the first half of 2022

Shadows

The Streets

Prologue

kasama ka sa paotsin
kumakain ng shark fins
pagkatpos manood ng gig
magyoyosi lang sa gilid

sumasarap pag kasama ka
sumasarap pag kasama ka
sumasarap pag kasama ka
sumasarap pag kasama ka

pwede bang wag mag alala
pwede bang wag mahiya
hahatid kita kahit pa
matulog sa kalsada na
bukas ba'y magkikita
san naman tayo pupunta?
kahit san basta kasama ka
mas masaya kapag kasama ka

mas masarap kapag kasama ka
mas masarap kapag kasama ka
mas masarap kapag kasama ka
mas masarap kapag kasama ka

MATOKI, Walktrip - paotsin

Mixed by MATOKI
Mastered by Dan Monreal

the words i read between the fine lines of your skin
were the words i wanna hear
tell me that you mean it
tell me that it's true
oh, my heart belongs to you

when i'm with you nothing matters at all
when i'm with you nothing makes sense at all

i couldn't imagine how i would be if i lost you
you held my hand and everything fell back
into place

when i'm with you nothing matters at all
when i'm with you nothing makes sense at all
when i'm with you nothing matters at all
when i'm with you nothing makes sense at all
when i'm with you

Fine Lines

will i still love you in the spring?
cause my heart's got lots to give
or will you let it wilt away?
color my world, then leave it grey

will your picture stop my heart again
so bad i light a cigarette
then i summon my ancestors
who shame me for how down bad i am

will you be aching for my presence
the way you crane your neck for a kiss
from the summer sun to your skin

sorry for all this talk of seasons
i just fear for a future where you wont be familiar with my name

will you still like me in the spring?
does your heart have room to spare?
if/when you thirst for tenderness
know that my spring's for you to rest in
dive in

will you feel so unreal to me
i reach out for your hand
when you hold it back
feels like i'm finally running my fingers thru some grass

and it won't feel like the first time
ever again, but i'm fine with that
just as long as you want me for the next

cause you can bet that i'll still want you
but if my spring of love's a bit too big
for you to swim in

you can tell me, like we practiced
better to quit while we're ahead

but if i still love you in the spring
when my heart's got more to give
please don't let it wilt away
please don't let it wilt away

lovespring - Japanese Surplus

(happy holy week. this is a worship song.)

told me that he made you question
if you're someone who could ever be loved
let me tell you that everyone who knows you
feels the pull to love you so naturally, like gravity

i know your mind is heavy
you feel stuck, but you’re exactly where you wanna be
and i would hate to be a part of all the complicated shit
so just hear me out plain and simply

don’t you worry, my love
i know this isn’t how it’s supposed to go
but don’t you know?
it wouldn’t kill us to break the rules

at least for tonight
so hold me close
then when the morning comes, let me go
but for now let me have
the honor to warm your soul

your eyes shine like the Second Coming
come on over, the guilt's worth laying by your side

wouldn’t you like some company while waiting
for your eyes to see yourself the way i see you through mine?

i’m selfish, you already knew that
you’re curious, won’t you give in for a minute?

trace the ink on my skin, again and again
i’ve been coveting your fingers on my chest

so if i’m your moment of weakness
have it then let it pass
cross my heart, it won’t be the death of us
come on, satiate my "what ifs"

the veil is lifted and i want you underneath
i open up fast, you make it so easy
tell yourself "it’s just a one time thing"
"you’re only human" so you wake me when you leave

don’t you worry, my love
i have no want to tie you down with rope
just know
there’s no doubt that your'e someone who
could be loved, you’re worthy of
all the love coming toward you

i want you to want you,
i'll love you way past til you love you
i want you to want you,
i'll love you way past til you love you

unceremoniously - Japanese Surplus

the flowers have wilted
i thought i had more time
but the weather has roughened
and roughened my mind
my promise expired
didn’t know that was something i could do

thought i was tough but
i must have mistaken it for
the resolve i grew with you
and what the fuck did i do?
i let it die
my bark turned into bite and it got you

now it’s too late for a next time
but your hands and your smile i could never unfamiliarize
i want to deserve you

still raining down in my heart, it’s pouring
my love for you
but the season has ended
with no assurance of when

it'll come back, i hope it does
you're not by my side, but in the meantime
i hope it’s alright that my heart
is gonna be yours for a while, a while

i wanted to be your
shelter from the storm
instead i became its eye
and when the sky
was grey, all i did was hide

now i’m aching from your absence
the way you did from mine too
i'll be better to deserve you

it’s still raining down in my heart, it’s pouring
my love for you
but the season has ended
with no assurance of when

it'll come back, i hope it does
you're not by my side, but in the meantime
i hope it’s alright that my heart
is still yours

i'll still dream for you in many more seasons
write you many more songs
til my heart runs out of pages
but i doubt that'll ever happen

cause you’re the kind that someone loves
for a long time, it’s no question
i hope it’s alright that my heart
is gonna be yours for a while, a while

i want to deserve you
will you still want me when i deserve you?
i'll be better to deserve you
please still want me to deserve you

downpour

downpour - Japanese Surplus

o mahal, kay tagal na ako'y bumubulong sa hangin
na wag sayangin ang paghihintay at pagiipon ng aking bibig
na balang araw ay maisisigaw ko ang aking pagmamahal

at mamaos man ay hindi problema
kung ang dulo ng tinig ko 
ay mahahanap ang bisig mo

ikaw na ba ang pinagiipunan ng boses ko?
sana nga, sana nga, sana nga

o mahal, kay tagal
nang lumilibot ang aking mga mata
nang huminto sila sa'yo
natagpuan ang tunay na pahinga at hindi na lumingon pa

kahit ang araw ay pabor sa'yo
gayang-gaya nya ang pagkintab ng iyong pagkatao

sa iyong paningin ba ako maliligaw mula ngayon?
sana nga, sana nga, sana nga

o mahal, kay tagal ng puso ko na iyong tangan
ugat nito'y naka ukit na sa mga linya ng iyong palad
at dito'y nakaangkop

noon pa ay nandiyan lang
naghahanda lamang na kumapit
sa puso na saktong magkakasya

akin na ba, akin na ba ang pusong iyon?
sana nga, sana nga, sana nga

huwag na mag tataka
kung hindi na ako titikom pa

at ikalma na ang iyong kaba
ikaw ang paboritong tanawin ng aking mga mata

at kung may mag tatanong man kung nasaan ang aking puso
ang nais kong laging sabihin ay nasa iyong palad

bagama’t hindi ko napansin
aking katawan may mithiin
noong una pang tingin
layunin ng mata ko’y ika’y kilalanin

ang puso ko, sa palad mo
buong tiwala na aalagaan mo
sana ay wag mong bitawan
o ibalik sa akin
sayong sayo na ang puso ko

(sana nga, sana nga, sana nga)
sayong sayo ang puso ko

~
cover art by @unardent <3
co-written with jo <3

puso, palad (sana nga)

puso, palad (sana nga) - Japanese Surplus

All the tracks in this ep were written when I was still in highschool. Writing music was one of the ways for me to cope with expressing my mental and emotional struggles, so these tracks are close to my heart. I hope people who may relate, have went through, or are still going through something similar would enjoy them.

Co-produce: Rome Gomez
Mixing: Calix
Album art: Cake Mix

you know i get scared sometimes

cosmic basement