Fed Up

belowground - i don't know

ϞCHØØL ϞHØØTΣR - Better Off Dead (Alt Version)

Mixing booze
And delta-9
Is an overrated high

When you sink into
The mattress on the floor
And feel like you wanna die

Waking up
Blood sweat and vomit
Never speaking of    last night

Listening
To the voices that you hear when dreaming
Under bedroom closed blinds moonlight

BLOOD/SWEAT/VOMIT

I've been thinking about you lately 
About how much you fucking hate me
And how you said I could never amount to anything
I think the fact that you were right
Is the thing that's keeping me up all night
But despite all of that you're not the worst that I've ever seen

Call me stupid call me retarded 
Never be sorry for what I did
If you still hate me you're out of luck
Cause you'll never ever get me to shut up

All the things I've done that seem to make you run away
Things you can't be bothered to say
And you never seem to notice all the things I do
It's like I don't exist and neither do you

Call me stupid call me retarded 
Never be sorry for what I did
If you still hate me you're out of luck
Cause you'll never ever get me to give a fuck


Bow down to the end of your loaded gun
Put to your head cause of all the things you've done
Then you can finally understand
Your life was always in your hands
Rethink your life and your process 
Every failure doesn’t sting any less
Break down when it doesn’t come easily 
Give up when you turn twenty-three
Hear truths that hit too close to home
Get scared to go out on your own 
Love it when you get stuck in place 
With that empty look that’s on your face
Hasn’t happened yet it never will
You never had those kind of skills 
Why can’t you just realize the fact 
That this will be your final act
Bow down to the end of your loaded gun
Put to your head cause of all the things you've done
Then you can finally understand
Your life was always in your hands

No More Spiders

These days got a lot on my plate
These days got a heart full of hate for myself
It happens to the best of us
Save some self pity for the rest of us boy

Ok with the things that I did
Find ways of rebuilding the bridge that I burned
The ashes still smoldering
Reminds me of the weight that I'm shouldering

Fall asleep in the embrace of plants
Wake up being eaten alive by ants
I admire their camaraderie
Cause I found a new purpose my body is their colony

Colony

In an instant I was greeted at
The doorway of a toxic social scene
Narcissistic and conceited and
I fit right in 'cause they were just like me
Made my way down to the kitchen
Kicking back and swapping stories, getting stoned
But the stash runs dry and soon enough
You're broken, sad, and sober and alone

Tempted to try and fill the void with
Parties, sex, and surface level friends
But a few years running circles later
Realize you're right back there again
Opportunities will dwindle
As you fall further behind all of your peers
Old friendships left unkindled take
The back seat to new families and careers

So while you can, hold on to what you can
And if you can, don't let it go
Or end up as an empty man
In an empty house that used to feel like home

Now we're picking up new hobbies
New attempts to fill the silence of the day
But soon enough we find out we can't
Lift or sing or play this pain away
Homeless, drunks, and prisoners
Their faces broadcast onto the TV
Provide decent folk examples of
The people they should strive to never be

And the algorithm's spewing shit
A force-fed feedback loop where nothing's new
Creating culture celebrating virtue-ized compulsion to consume
So watch another episode, the TV screen eternally turned on
And if the screen's not sharp enough then buy a better one on Amazon

So while you can, hold on to what you can
And if you can, don't let it go
Or end up as an empty man
In an empty house that used to feel like home

Now I watch my wheels turn, I'm taking
Shortcuts to dead ends, nowhere to go
So for now I'm waiting patiently
To visit places I may never go
I know I'll get there eventually
Even if "there" is but an early grave
At least I'll be rotting liberated
Till then give me something I can break

So while you can, hold on to what you can
And if you can, don't let it go
Or end up as an empty man
In an empty house that used to feel like home

Don't Let It Go

Daddy built quite the business back in 1950
When he dies, he's gonna give it all to you
So settle down, get a house 50 miles from the city
Just like average people do

Take the wife and the kids on a ten day vacation
And pay someone to mow your yard
In your pockets, the power of ten generations
On a magic golden card

And it's trivial to make it when you made it from the start
When you're taking what was given to you, life can't be so hard
So why should I put in overtime for a world that was never mine
To destroy and rebuild, put together and then take apart

Neighbor comes home with a brand new shiny F-150
Brand new dealer stickers 2024
Suddenly, the Chevrolet in your driveway looks shitty
Don't you hate it when other people have more?

So you're waiting for a purpose to crash through your ceiling
Fight a holy war or build electric cars
After work, you can search for a semblance of meaning
Through your backyard telescope aimed at the stars

And it's trivial to make it when you made it from the start
When you're taking what was given to you, life can't be so hard
So why should I put in overtime for a world that was never mine
To destroy and rebuild, to destroy and rebuild
To destroy and rebuild, put together and then take apart
Put together and then take apart
Put together and then take apart
Put together and then take apart
Put together and then take apart

Don't Let It Go

Cyborg9000