For all those who've been frustrated by a printer, this song's for you.

LYRICS:

When we first met in the office
you were wearing bubble wrap, so full of promise.
Pages per minute, dots per inch.
A scanner as well and fax at a pinch.
We had such fun!

But it didn't last for ever, in fact not long at all.
Soon I was banging my head against the wall.
The good times were gone.

Now you've jammed again and I'll miss my deadline.
You've jammed again and this, this is the last time.
No more empty paper tray, I give up.
No more cheap ink on eBay, I give up.
The unnecessary blank page,
always such a waste and I give up.
I give up.
I've had enough.

We gave you a chance, the repairman came out.
He looked you all over and said there's no doubt,
this thing ain't broke.

But I won't change my mind, it's decided.
I'm so tired of trying to make you
print double-sided, it's a joke.

And now you've jammed again and I'll miss my deadline.
You've jammed again and this, this is the last time.
No more empty paper tray, I give up.
No more cheap ink on eBay, I give up.
The unnecessary blank page,
always such a waste and I give up.
I give up.

Maybe I'm crazy, you are just a machine.
Maybe I have been overreacting...

But now you've jammed again and I'll miss my deadline.
Yeah you've jammed again and this, this is the last time.
No more empty paper tray, I give up.
No more cheap ink on eBay, I give up.
The unnecessary blank page,
always such a waste and I give up.
I give up.

Oh and you've jammed again and I'll miss my deadline.
Can't believe that you've jammed again and this,
this is the very last time.
No more empty paper tray, I give up.
No more cheap ink on eBay, I give up.
The unnecessary blank page,
it's always such a waste and I give up.
I give up.
You're unplugged.

CREDITS:

The dot matrix printer audio sample is remixed from this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w-3fUtMwqnE

The Ballad of the Printer

A nerdy singer-songwriter playing geekulele - mostly humorous ukulele songs about the web and other geeky topics. 

The Ballad of the Printer

Daniemon