it’s been so long, i’ve missed you omg

you and your music mean so much to me💜 I know im just some random guy on the internet but you've had impact on my life with your music. This is another song that will be apart of me. Thank you

prod @recyclexBin
mixed + mastered by shinigami and justin spaulding.

i shouldnt have drove (prod. recycleBin)

Wanna whip a foreign
Only whipped a focus
That was just my brody’s tho like I ain’t even own it
I ain’t even have to cause he had paid it forward
Imma pay it back if I ever get it sorted

In my body in my blood
I was down to give it up
Hold you closer when you come
Wonder what you’re thinking of
Wanna ask you when it’s done
Was it ever good enough?
Think of when our legs would touch
And I miss it so much

Would you call it off if I can’t feel at all?
You never said it back
So only time was lost
And it’s just different now
Cause we don’t even talk
But if you’re happy there
You know it’s all I want 

Quick one turning into three months closer 
Clearing out some space for your stuff when you’re over
Said I did enough but I’m just doing what I’m supposed to
Everything I thought cause I don’t got that much exposure 
To broke hearts living in a broke mind
I’ll be in a box in the ground in like no time
You don’t gotta worry tho it’s bigger than you playing me
Wonder why it took like half a year for you to say to me
like anything about the way you give it up

The way I cope with shit myself it’s pretty hard to judge
But I don’t put it on a soul I keep it to myself
Or maybe turn into a ghost when nothing seems to help
It’s pretty shitty yeah but listen thats just instinct
And we get into it like every time the phone rings
And I’ve been bleeding through the pages in a red mist
Stepping up onto the bridge and then it kicks in

if I can’t feel at all
You never said it back
So only time was lost
And it’s just different now
Cause we don’t even talk
But if you’re happy there
You know it’s all I want

Underfoot

no capital letters

prod by caves
completely non profit

lyrics

her brown eyes are warm
n my tired face is worn
my shaky hands are torn
but her brown eyes are warm 

its a quarter past 1 and im high us fuck
im just thinking bout the weekend when my darling comes 
i gotta breathe, let out hatred in black sludge
now its april and im wondering, the fuck is up?
shawty i think im in need of new bed springs
(i need new bed springs) 
voddy n cran rip a bowl n get headspins 
(you bring better things)
ill take the train if u want we should lock in
(lets go, lets lock in)
winter weather just feel like wisconsin 
(wont fold, im all in)

winter weather just feel like wisconsin 
ill take the train if u want we should lock in
winter weather just feel like wisconsin
shawty i think im in need of new bed springs

catching trains again
trekking through the mountain air
this time through the south instead
from her eyes i wipe the hair
double down and vault the stairs
ill be there when no one cares
light my stoag and ponder there
out back with my vacant stare

its a quarter past 1 and im high as fuck
(i need new bed springs)
im just waiting for the weekend when my darling comes
(u bring better things ) (with my vacant stare)
i gotta breathe let the hatred out in black sludge
(lets go, lets lock in)
now its april and im wondering the fuck is up
(wont fold, im all in)
shawty i think im in need of new bed springs 
(ill be there when no ones cares)

im all in

wisconsin (caves)

and these seconds go by like they’re nothing 
and precious is time but means nothing to me 
and these minutes rain down and cause flooding 
my waterproof coat hides the heart on my sleeve 

and i met her last year through her cousin 
it was april or may i don’t know honestly
i was away with the fairies all morning 
and we texted all day and it felt like a dream

now this time i once spent with my darling 
means nothing to her or to me 
oh my god 
how embarrassing for me was blubbing
in front of her mom and like 3 of her friends

and i guess ill be there if you need me 
you don’t have to fake to please me
you can talk to me so sweetly
or pretend that this is easy
it’s a daily rock bottom
so i drown my pain in weed leaves
10KG weights, and tea leaves
and when you hurt me kill discretely, please 

(greenwood)
try to parse through the things that you said
crossed over Madison, i loved you to death
stayed in the winter despite what i need
but we never made it to august heat
eyes on the valley, you asked me to wait
ask of the baggage, it's as is you care
still keep the coat that i got you in spring
i still keep the pictures i'm not even in

i still keep the pictures i’m not even in w/ greenwood (pekarot)

Lyrics soon:

it's been so damn cold
without you by my side
waking up with nobody else
you've been warned of my past reconciles
i'm alone
like a ghost
in your bed
you wouldn't know me
if i changed my face
personality's a bitch
and i'll never change
you said
you don't love me anyways
all alone

plastic surgery

sewerperson - fauna (hollowprpl x killedmyself) (snippet) 6/8/24

I was always watching you, you know
I show up to all your shows 
I play all your songs to newcomers in my car
I find you in my favorite stars 
I tell my friends every day I’m actually done with you.
And why this time It’s diffirent
And why this time they should believe me when I say this isn’t like the other times
And you’d have no idea why
You stayed awake even after you said goodnight to me
I set alarms at 2 am to see if you responded 
I made sure everything on our schedules corresponded 
But I was just never the one you wanted

9TAILS - camera roll (Official file and voice note)

The SoundCloud Files

lyrics:

and now she's grabbing at my thighs
can we stay inside
i think i'm falling for u baby
i can't tell u why
when i wanted to die
i couldn't see u right
but now i'm here with u
baby what's the move tonight

like when we done she put my shirt on
we're turned on
ask me if it's just tonight baby
that's wrong 
getting up to turn the lights back on
she know's that she's in all my best songs

mouthwash dripping on my shirt
u try to kiss me but my mouth still fucking hurts
posting pictures of me
now he wants u back
making money now
imma spend a rack

i've been tryna find my way
like can i make it through another day
you've been all up in my face
i just need some fucking space
i'm like please can i levitate

like when we done she put my shirt on
we're turned on
ask me if it's just tonight baby
that's wrong 
getting up to turn the lights back on
she know's that she's in all my best songs

i can' lose u again
burning holes in my skin
i just wanna forget
everything that i did
x2

mouthwash dripping on my shirt
u try to kiss me but my mouth still fucking hurts

mouthwash

context: this is the original version of nickisgonenow’s “there was blood on the floor underneath u” but we had a falling out, and it resulted in him taking me off the song before release 

nick passed away recently; fortunately for me, i was able to squash our issues long before that happened, and we were once again on good terms, he was a super talented person, and seeing the success this song would go on to gain never once bothered me (which is weird because i’m naturally a super jealous person) and i think that’s because i knew he had a banger on his hands, i remember when he first sent me this open and it shook my whole house on the speakers, i lost my mind. this song is perfect as it was without me squeezed on at the end, and i knew it 

nevertheless, any work i have with nick is now public on my profile, he was a character and a super talented person that i had the honour of working with 

i miss ya nick, and i hope whatever greets us after death is treating you well

my verse lyrics: 

and there was blood underneath you
dripping down from your nose 
wanna cry? baby me too 
and i just wanted to see you
bad day, feel ashamed
i just wanted a redo
i don’t feel it
i’m too fucked up to see you
out of my league
all these girls they wanna be you
down another bottle throw my sorrows in the back room
standing in the mirror
say “i love you”, you don’t have to 

__________

beat by: @nickisgonenow
featuring: @nickisgonenow
u the goat nick fr

underneath you w/ NICKISGONENOW (prod. NICKISGONENOW)

first single off my ep "i never asked for this", dropping december 25th!

thank u so much to @fantasycamp for featuring on this
and @nevrfall and @sainttomorrow for the wonderful production
cover art by evan carr :)

lyrics:
[decks]
light fading
im waiting
give me a reason
something to believe in
i can’t go back and i know that
im desperate and i show that
am i right or am i too naive
why won’t you leave
why won’t you leave

[fantasy camp]
goin through the motions but we’re faded
yeah time and time again it’s still the same shit
and im sorry if i ever kept you waiting
i just think that we’re in two different places
and i know its gonna kill me just to let go
but its easier than trying to forget though
there’s a place for you inside my heart forever
in my spirit we will always be together
i won’t let you down again
and this time i swear i mean it
all good things come to an end
and i think we’re both defeated
so let’s just take time
to find ourselves again
and i’ll wait right here
to find you at the end

[decks]
light fading
im waiting
give me a reason
something to believe in
i can’t go back and i know that
im desperate and i show that
am i right or am i too naive
why won’t you leave
why won’t you leave

plastic surgery

deadbeatteen

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