even though you've retired and there wont be anything new, your songs have a very special place in my heart. Wish you the best, thanks.

big thanks to these guys for the features:
@lilskeleskrrt
@deadbrokeoffical

prod:
@cxldblxxd

mastered by:
@afterlife66
https://soundcloud.com/user-659653109

spotify<3

out cold w/ skele & dead broke (cxld blxxd)

produced by hiraeth


just say that you hate me i wont break
sitting in agony dont change
say that you love me its too late
cant even look at my face
how could you do that to somebody who loves you ?
go and lie and say you dont even mean to
i didnt wanna go i dont wanna leave you
you know i wanna, know i wanna believe you

just say that you hate me i wont break
sitting in agony dont change
say that you love me its too late
cant even look at my face
how could you do that to somebody who loves you ?
go and lie and say you dont even mean to
i didnt wanna go i dont wanna leave you
you know i wanna, know i wanna believe you

you left me in a pool i swim with agony
crying at the bottom what is happening?
you tell me be more open never let me in
im drowning in my sorrows guess ill die again

just say that you hate me i wont break
sitting in agony dont change
say that you love me its too late
cant even look at my face
how could you do that to somebody who loves you ?
go and lie and say you dont even mean to
i didnt wanna go i dont wanna leave you
you know i wanna, know i wanna believe you

anor

produced by hiraeth

remember to wash the socks u came in

And its so obvious
How can you not see me
See me
If I ran away would you need me ?
Played your last messages on repeat
This the last time that you’ll see me

So let me down
Pull me out
Of this hole im in
Baby would you cave it in 
What is happening
I can’t believe I shat again :p!!
Blood is everywhere
Im crawling out of bed again

Fuck with me for the last time 
This the last night
Fights getting outta hand now
But its alright
Fuck living ima die now 
Its about time
Thoughts sheltering my mind out
From the outside

Trying to run from the past
Tell me how hard does it get now
Living to die in a bed
No in-between to forget now
Call me when all of it ends
Im putting a gun to my he’d now

Fuck with me for the last time 
This the last night
Fights getting outta hand now
But its alright
Fuck living ima die now 
Its about time
Thoughts sheltering my mind out
From the outside

Fuck with me for the last time 
This the last night
Fights getting outta hand now
But its alright
Fuck living ima die now 
Its about time
Thoughts sheltering my mind out
From the outside

newmaker

w/ @sleepywater <3
prod @afterlife66 🖤

~~lyrics~~

easy to target
swear i’ve been honest
i’m still tryna rejuvenate
from the memories last august
ink drip from the ceiling
familiar feelings
to take time is to realize
what it really means to be healing

knees go numb when i reach for the shelf
there’s an old song that speaks of myself
but i’ve lost it; my subconscious 
won’t take away this blockage
it’s irritating; the way i hate it
all you are is full of nonsense

how you gonna say ur not into me
everytime you’re my enemy
i feel out of body
everytime im getting the…
drugs from my doctor
off a sedative, i forgot her
i feel like i deserve my happy ever after
i don't like it here, i like raptures
enrapture me for a disaster
i got wounds on me so where’s my plaster
in a room with me, i feel like casper
she don't touch me; i shatter
she dont trust me, i’m in tatters
i’m forever climbing up this
unforgiving ladder

i’m unfair & i know it
frustration; i bestow it
i’m shaking baby, yeah i’m aching,
maybe this is punishment for the broken
the sight that i see through my eye 
isn’t blind
a sigh of relief comforted by a lie
i can’t really take it, 
the pace that i’m making is 
turning me into the me i despise

fuck, i'll turn my back on ur ass & won't
 give it a thought or the time of the day
it doesn't matter, the wounds & the plaster are begging me
“autumn, you just gotta change”
if i go any faster, my body will splatter
 yet i'll be alive, put me outta the pain 
i pick up the fragments of me that just happen
to still be in tact, even after the rain

everything i spew out
i tell the same story
bout how you don't want me
never ever want me
how comes ur all up on me
i pull u, you don’t pull me
im stressed out, can't relax
another pill, i might relapse

i just don’t get it how this life
taught revenge and left me behind
no time to cry…
cause in the end you’ll be fine

how you gonna say ur not into me
everytime you’re my enemy
i feel out of body
everytime im getting the…
drugs from my doctor
off a sedative, i forgot her
i feel like i deserve my happy ever after
i don't like it here, i like raptures
enrapture me for a disaster
i got wounds on me so where’s my plaster
in a room with me, i feel like casper
she don't touch me; i shatter
she dont trust me, i’m in tatters
i’m forever climbing up this
unforgiving ladder

wounds & plaster w/ sleepwater [prod. afterlife]

produced by me :)

socials:
https://www.instagram.com/deadfishig/

https://discord.gg/hsUwdAJknJ

lyrics:

You said I was something
When I think I’m nothing
Always smiling at me
When I say something stupid

Always tryna call me
But my phone switched on focus
Always writing songs
And you know that it’s exhausting

Never think that anything
I write will ever make it
Always say I’m fine, 
Guess I’ll fake it til I’ll make it

Always regret anything I say
I can’t help it
Staring at the ceiling like
It’s gonna help me

I feel undone
It’s been a long run
Block out the sun
Try to have fun

Don’t look at me
I’ve changed in 3 weeks
Stuck under debris
Used to be so carefree

I stg someday you’ll try to call me
But it’ll always go to the voice mail
Lazy fat fuck, never achieved anything
I call me that, my self-esteem has always been
This low, can’t switch my life around
On God, that’s why I can’t stick around 
Prefer staying in my room and hate my life
When everybody around just feeds my lies

focus

produced by branwen

completely non profit

lyrics

turn it up turn it up for another night
getting drunk on a sunday till the morning light
waking up in a monday in a strangers bed
i think i finished all my drinks theyre in my fuckin head

holy shit here i go again
i been off my meds for a while
n im a god again
i dont really know who i am
n im alright with it
at least im being honest
if it hurts then u dont feel regret

ur head will hurt in the morning
u dont give a fuck
shes kinda cute might as well go n try ur luck
she thought that i was 25 holy wtf
so this wont go past tonight idgaf

19 i make connections when in drunk until i break them when im sober
in my heart im older
i bleed from underneath the scotch tape thats holding me together
its forever

why waste my time writing all these fucking metaphors
im still in love with the person that i met before
gave her my heart n she threw it on the fucking floor
i find it hard just to trust cus in the end
fucked my best friend
said she wishing i was dead
u live in my head
both u n him
and its such a mess 
that u have left
that u have left
that u have left

(hero)

i find it funny how we repeat such a cycle here again
shits so toxic its obnoxious she refuse to leave my head
and im okay with that, as okay with being sliced in half
"i got a thing for artists" oh i want ur take on that
chugging octane to experience a numbness when she on me
stop me, id like to see u try oh u could never
sulfate to really rub the cut into my skin
with scotch tape to wrap the fatal wound once again

scotchtape & sulfates ft. hero (branwen)

not for profit

original:
https://soundcloud.com/sewerperson/lock-da-doors-samashi

love y'all, hope u enjoy
thanks for making this song king @sewerperson
shoutout samashi

lock da doors (cover) [samashi]

i can't tell lies
with this cup in my hand 
i can't love life
being who i am 
the place my body lies
is where u left me
the place my body lies
is where u killed me  

i can't tell lies
with this cup in my hand 
i can't love life
being who i am 
the place my body lies
is where u left me
the place my body lies
is where u killed me 

u hurt me again
fuck all of ur reasons
ur fucked in the head 
alone in the end 
fuck ur fucking treason
ur fucked in the head 
i gave you all my love
when i had nothing left
u never gave it back
so aknowledge u fucked my path 

look, the seasons changing
sunny days but it's still raining 
the look u gave me
i always knew that u fucking hate me 
stop, with all the blaming 
if u shut up i'll simply take it
ur attitude is still the same and
i know that u won't change it	


i can't tell lies
with this cup in my hand 
i can't love life
being who i am 
the place my body lies
is where u left me
the place my body lies
is where u killed me  

i can't tell lies
with this cup in my hand 
i can't love life
being who i am 
the place my body lies
is where u left me
the place my body lies
is where u killed me

i can't tell lies with this cup (vyle & rxhff)

mix. @ztope

(prodnxku) 

-non profit-

lyrics -

aye sinking
help me find my meaning
your the only one in
my life not deceiving
girl im barely breathing
i cant fight this feeling
why does everything feel
so fuckin unappealing
everyday i wake up
starting at the ceiling yeah its
just another day i wont cope
with these feelings i
ant fuckin healing i
need time to my self
how appealing never mind
ima die can feel it?
tell me do you feel this?

cuz no one cares
about whats going on
yeah i need help
why cant you tell?

deceive (prodnxku)

[AMV]: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DNv4eGItpyg 
produced by @nate2timezz & i
thank you endlessly for listening.
more to come in time
🖤

they say, "you're not alone"
but i'm weighing myself down to the bone
i'm deprived of your voice, your expressions, your tones
they scream, "don't.. go"
but i guess you didn't listen
i hope that you just missed it

i'm losing my grip on reality
i need some help or just someone around me
not a physical family
the moment feelings all erupt
they can't handle your trust
guess i was too much of a burden from the cut
but don't let yourself go and doubt on me
the ocean is howling
that's my kind of outing
you don't know the hurt that it brings
can't focus, can't breathe
i love you, but you know what i think?

i'm way too detached
you don't got my back
been tryna distract
"that boy's such a drag"
i lay in my bed; think things never meant
her hand; never leant
where have you been, love

that girl made me feel like i didn't wanna suffer
validated all my reasons
and then continued to smother
cards all on the table
the table's brittle as fuck
cause you leave with no intentions of hurting me
that's enough-

if what you say is what you mean
then fall back onto me
i'll swallow up your misery
i don't care what it brings
i'll be your puppet with no strings
just show me that i have meaning
like a matter, or a purpose
just a reason that i'm breathing
i've been wishing on the stars since a kid
they're where my arms don't reach
but my eyes look past them
the scars make a pretty constellation
they connect all i see
but at the end of the day, they still look past it

you gotta hope it lasts
you're holding yourself back
if you're falling, your wings' cracked
you gotta snap em back
and when the sky becomes the ceiling,
i'll throw rocks to make it crash
oh, don't look back (2x)

through and through
every time i break down my own recluse
just because i thought they understood me too
from my point of view
they never do (2x)

they say, "you're not alone"
but i'm weighing myself down to the bone
i'm deprived of your voice, your expressions, your tones
you've never known
but i guess you didn't listen
i hope that you dismissed it.

everlast [prod. nate2timez x autumndropsdead]

single off of new idealism ep

lyrics

indicate
indicate to me girl that u r right hereee
i’ve been off guide me bae i need u to steer
lights are dim, there’s no ones home, i’ve forgotten all my fears
coz when i see ur face i tend to dry away the tears

nothing else, you is all that’s been on what’s my mind 
i just want u to see that u are what is mine 
i’m sorry i’m who i am and that’s like most the time
i just want u baby can u believe me this time

i just want u baby can u believe me this time
i hope u know that what i show is not what’s inside 
a lot for me to ask but can u ignore all the signs 
i don’t think like they do and i guess with this i’m ripe

and i know
times not moving slow
but with this speed i’m okaaaaaay
reverting back to old ways
but this time i have u 
purple change to blue
nightmares turned to dark days
and hiding out in cold space
until i found u 

still tryna find a way to move 
but i found a source of light and well u might get me thru
u keep forcing me to 
and that’s the honest truth
i’m gonna leave this room my
whole life i was consumed by
something, i never knew why
but now i think there’s 2 sides
and now i’ll live a new life
it’s really do or die

focus

Deadfish

Recent comments

Mike.exe

Kurama SD (New account in bio)

SXRV.

nyla♡

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