Jsut wanting to cry and think about the girl i met online during quarantine 

I’m thinking about my ex I met on discord lol..we lasted for 7 months..this song reminds me so much of us.

This song is fucking amazing, ngl. But I feel sad bc of me end my ex boyfriend. I feel like I'm still in love with him but he's not anymore. It also reminds me of those times, that we were together </3

This song was about giving myself permission to grieve as well-intentioned people offered explanations for what I was going through. I probably say "shit" too much lol, but that language felt most authentic to me at the time. 

That season sucked, and I didn't need people telling me that it would be okay or that God was doing this/letting it happen for a reason. I just needed to feel how much it hurt and, low key, a hug.

Good Intentions

this fr my fav song ive made so far bruh hope yall fw it <3
shoutouts @polearm (up next) for masterin it 
shoutouts @halberd-3000 i forgot what he did fr
---
always alone in my bedroom 
missed phone calls 
i should prolly hittem back soon
half finished songs
i should prolly get to those too 
but i been losing all my motivation
idk what i love anymore
idk what i love anymore

always alone in my bedroom 
missed phone calls 
i should prolly hittem back soon
half finished songs
i should prolly get to those too 
but i been losing all my motivation
idk what i love anymore

cuz all of the things that i used to do 
feels like a chore i forgot about 
and all of the things that i used to do 
don't feel the same when it's not with you

but im keepin it moving
a song every week 
till i live in a movie
and no longer speak
about all of the demons 
that i cannot hide
that don't seem to be leaving
the back of my mind

any time soon, anytime soon 
any time soon, anytime soon 

so im keepin it moving
forget all the rest
focus on all 
of the things i do best
got nothing to prove
i put that to the test
i live in the moment
to kill all the stress
that i feel in my chest now 
i feel on my chest now
i feel on my chest now

now i'm always alone in my bedroom 
missed phone calls 
i should prolly hittem back soon
half finished songs
i should prolly get to those too 
but i been losing all my motivation
idk what i love anymore

cuz all of the things that i used to do 
feels like a chore i forgot about 
and all of the things that i used to do 
don't feel the same when it's not with you

oh well whatever happens happens 
(i'm only 18 i don't wanna die yet)

idk what i love

buy/listen

thanks so much to everyone for the love and support through making this. more coming soon. shout out to Brody for the beats, Andy for the heat, and Arlaina for the cover art.

180 degrees (prod. brody)

stumbled over this song a week or so ago and decided to do a lil remix on it <3
original: https://soundcloud.com/sushisai/discord
beat: https://soundcloud.com/sketchmyname/hopes-up

Cause we sat in that call till 5 in the morning and 
you fell asleep with that cute little snore but
You're a fucking harpy know you'll harm me
Get so fucking high I feel your heart beat

Were so fucking foolish ye I know
We set it up for failure from the very start
UwU OwO UwU OwO
Worlds separate us both so why do we care so much
Maybe its an act 2 lonely fucking souls just
Getting what they wanted aye someone there to fall apart with

demxntia:
cuz we sat in that call 
till 5 in the morning
And you fell asleep
but i'm still wide awake
cuz the words that you say
just won't leave my head
and i think of your voice
when i lay in my bed

when we sing along to the
songs that we play
it's a little out of sync
but it's all okay
when i see your face
through my dirty screen
i won't feel alone
if it's you and me

You're a fucking harpy know you'll harm me
Get so fucking high I feel your heart beat
Through that screen
We can fake like were happy

Cause we sat in that call till 5 in the morning
And you fell asleep with that cute little snore and
Those words that you say they make my sadness heal but
I can't guarantee any of this is real
I don't care, I'll just feel, while I can UwU OwO
Cause when those drugs kick in you won't see me again
I'll wither away in my fucking bed like it's always been
Things won't ever change, please pretend its real
Even tho it's fake

suisai & demxntia - discord (remix)

thank you for 6K. glad to finally work with one of my best friends in the scene @ihateshinigami

i never asked 
for the cards 
i been dealt with
and i still
don't know
where my mind is
feel like
my happiness and i
have part ways
feel my eyes
growin heavy
on my pale face

and all i ever
wanna be is enough for you
but i never get close
no matter what i do, and
everybody is sayin
i should relax
but the stress is 
piling up as time elapse

and i swear it never gets better
i been sleepin less and less
this shit is lasting forever
but i try my fucking best
i got too much on my plate
i'm sorry i'm far away
i promise i don't mean to be
but this ain't easy to say

so don't go away from me
i just need a little bit more time
don't go away from sme
i just need a little bit more time

when it's said and done 
i hope that i'm enough
for the ones i love
but it's getting tough
so just bear with me
you're the one i need
i've been losing sight
got no room to breath


[shinigami]

w/ my eyes wide open
i see clearly now
stretch my hands
let fate fall into place

up and down i been falling
cold wind calling my name
i'm not the same as i once was

i'll take you away
to a world that is glistening
where everything's fine
have you even been listening?
i'm falling apart
you knew this from the start
lay your head in my arms
we'll never be apart

losing sight w/ shinigami

prod. tonedepalma

Throw me a bone
Tease me again
Call me a dick
 then call me your friend
You said it’s real
I said it’s fake
your choices reflect on the mess that you made

your choices reflect on the mess that you made
You don’t play sports, but you love to play games
And I hope that I never see you again
Cause if we do meet, It’s gone be the end

roll me up a blunt or a spliff
Let me relax, let my legs just lift
Get the pressure off my back, I don’t want that shit
If you speak on my name, then your blood gone drip

When the sun goes down, the switchblade comes out
It’s a warning to these pussies keep my name out your mouth
And it’s a warning to my ex, don’t you come around
I put it on my momma, we’re gone meet in the ground

You thought it was over, you thought I was done
well I find it funny that I’m not the one
So I’ll go and chill while I roll up a blunt
While you go and chill with your head in his arms

Wait nah, hold up
You can chill all by yourself
You don’t got no fucking man
You’re just a bitch on the shelf

You’re just a thot with an ass
And a big old head
only way you’ll make a living is sucking dick till your dead

keep my name out of your mouth

at least i try

guardin - at least i try [prod. jody]

go follow @sinxi rn he makes god tier music.

lyrics:

ill use this time to remind me
never fall in love cause it hurts
too much now days all i think ab are
awful things ye ill put that cyanide
right in my veins ye ill change my
discord name wont talk to anybody
thought it was better than nothing
but guess that i was wrong
cause i thought that you had

the cutest voice in the whole world
emissions were on made yer eyes glow
but youll never join the world no more
uwu o well
miss your touch like a phantom
cannot catch my breath cause the scuffed lungs
but at least theyll match a broken heart
uwu o well
ooo~ oooo~ oooo~

cause i miss all those days
we would mute ourselves in game
and talk shit about
the people we both hated
Now a days only hate that i haves
for myself
You said lets think bout the future
i understand that but
cant help but think bout what
could have been
said it was better than nothing
just wanted to feel anything

whats the point if were
wasting our time
its what you said
left a hole in my stomach
get over it
cant help but think about those nights
you had

the cutest voice in the whole world
emissions were on made yer eyes glow
but youll never join the world no more
uwu o well
miss your touch like a phantom
cannot catch my breath cause the scuffed lungs
but at least theyll match a broken heart
uwu o well

ill use this time to remind me
never fall in love cause it hurts
too much now days all i think ab are
awful things ye ill put that cyanide
right in my veins ye ill change my
discord name wont talk to anybody
thought it was better than nothing
all that i wanted was something

cutest voice in the whole world
emissions were on made yer eyes glow
but youll never join the world no more
uwu o well
miss your touch like a phantom
cannot catch my breath cause the scuffed lungs
but at least theyll match a broken heart
uwu o well

uwu o well ~ [p. sinxi]

OFFICIAL MUSIC VIDEO HERE
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pbnrnTJpvB0

shoutouts 2 @kaiyko as always!!

let me have a minute to get
my head on straight
i really haven’t been myself
for almost 28 days and i think
what a bummer could November really be?
i think there’s something that my eyes can’t see
cuz lately i’ve been getting so upset
with almost everything 

i don’t wanna be a villain
in this story of mine (neither do you)
i don’t wanna be a perfect person
that’s just a lie
but you keep taking all the words that
keep falling out my mouth
i don’t think you see what my
problem is even all about

oh, what a lie 
that we live
it’s alright to be 
alone sometimes
what a life 
that we’re given
it’s alright to to be 
alone sometimes

efforts wasted
and so am i tonight
feelings faded
like everything in my life
different faces
i’d rather stay inside
been gone for ages
so why’d you stay tonight?

i don’t wanna miss you
i don’t wanna need you
i don’t wanna feel like
i’m nothing without you
i don’t wanna miss you
i don’t wanna need you
i just can’t pretend
that i’m perfect without you

oh, what a lie 
that we live
it’s alright to be 
alone sometimes
what a life 
that we’re given
it’s alright to to be 
alone sometimes

and i don’t wanna
live a life where
i’m feeling sorry
so baby take all
my mistakes
and blame it all on me
cuz i’m not you and
you’re not me
so we can just 
call this a tragedy
but then i’d be
lying once again

SPOTIFY

it's alright w/ kaiyko [MUSIC VIDEO IN DESCRIPTION]

lyrics:

I shouldn't be crying
I knew it would go this way
You shouldnt be worried
I cant be saved all the time by you
Babe

Cause all I see is you be happy with another one
All I hear is your voice when I'm all alone
I need to get my shit together, I dont wanna be a burden any more
Picking pieces off the floor

And here I am again, reminiscing bout the days
You would pull me out of this fucking maze
I cant rely on you anymore
Cuz I dont wanna be a burden to everyone

I shouldn't be crying
I knew it would go this way
You shouldnt be worried
I cant be saved all the time by you
Babe
x2

spotify/itunes

i shouldn't be crying

LYRICS:-
i would risk my heart
just to love you
i would risk it all
just to fall for you

baby don't cry,
i know that you're trying
baby don't lie,
i know that you're hurting
is it too much? is too much 
for you
maybe it's time? maybe it's time 
for you
to feel what i feel
to see what i see
to know that my love is real
i would never lie to you
you know that i'll die for you
so rest your head on me
you can put your trust in me
i can treat you like a queen
so just put your love on me

suisai & demxntia - discord (remix)

demxntia 🌐🖤

Recent comments

It’sOver

Christina Cervantes

Indie Foxxo

klyami!

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