Aloalo

Buy on bandcamp

Jeahy - Aloalo

Download available at: https://www.orfium.com/track/622709/cucks-in-the-wind-ft-samglaze-lakembra/

Piano by Samglaze: https://soundcloud.com/samglaze
Lyrics written by /u/688as (lyrics below).

From Episode 39 of The Dick Show:
https://soundcloud.com/dick-show/episode-39-santa-cuck-diy-glow

Asterios clips from:
http://biggest.thedickshow.com/episode-77/
http://thedickshow.com/episode-21/
http://thedickshow.com/episode-31/
https://soundcloud.com/user-667747853/060-intrigued-hesitation

*Now with 50% less fade out!

Lyrics:
I close my eyes
As I prep the bull for my wife to fuck  
I open wide
Wrap my lips around and give a hearty suck

Cucks in the wind
All we are is cucks in the wind

Same old song
I hide in the closet 'til my wife is done
I call up Dick
And ask him if he wants to hear my latest bit

Cucks in the wind
All we are is cucks in the wind
Kokonuts!

My wife's son
Tells me I'm not funny, and I yell too much
My patreon
Is the only thing in life that keeps me going on


Cucks in the wind
All we are is cucks in the wind (all we are is cucks in the wind)
Cucks in the wind (everything is cucks in the wind)
Everything is cucks in the wind

Cucks In The Wind (ft. Samglaze)

The BOOM BAP POW Show Theme

I'm A Cuckold (Ft. Lakembra)

Press F to pay respects
https://imgur.com/8JxcnuY

Tear jerking thumbnail by @samglaze

===
Would you know my name if i was banned from twitter?
Would it be the same if it went down the shitter?
I must be strong and carry on
Cause I know something something Sean's dong

Would you hold my hand if i saw you on gab?
Would you help me stand using their shitty app?
I guess ill say "See you Tuesday"
Cause I know I just can't stay here on twitter
===

Instrumental provided by: http://www.karaoke-version.com/

Tears On Twitter

Put this in the lolsuit.

Hear more: patreon.com/hmwh
Cover art by CalloftheDeep:
https://twitter.com/CalloftheDeep

Lyrics:
Here in my car
I am starting to drink
And I'm feeling alright
Hey, is that a dog bite?
In cars

Here in my car
Won't you please take a seat?
I know it's cold on the street
But hey, the rent's cheap
In cars

Here in my car
Where my life is breaking down
Will you blow into this please?
'cause I just drank Listerine
In cars

Here in my car
I feel the wind in my face
I can't eat any chocolate
But liquors A-OK!
In cars

Here in the car
I hope my owner comes back
Because the windows are up
And it's getting quite hot
In cars

Here in this car
I don't have a license
I can't even drive cars
I am just a dog
In a car

Dogs

As heard on Episode 100 of The Dick Show.
Get hard at patreon.com/hmwh

Congratulations to @dick-show on 100 episodes! This track was created with the collaboration of over 100 fans, and we thank everyone who contributed a sample.

Music and production: @aciou
Mix and Master: @samglaze
Backing vocals: @lakembra


FULL LIST OF CREDITS AND LYRICS: https://pastebin.com/YDgkjHkg

No U

Sadcast fan of the year, hello my name is Tito
Let me tell you why I'm here, listen to me bro
Spread the word, #dicklies but you can trust me though
People only hate me cause they found out I'm a pedo
Met this little honey online, she wants romancing
No need to wine and dine she says "drive over to my mansion"
Couple hours later knock knock pissing my pants when
Some dude opens the door "Have a seat my name's Chris Hansen"

Yes, yes my name is Tito, Tito, Tito
And I'm super trustworthy bro
Plus I babysit for free yo
Just don't tell my friggin' PO

Keep your busty soccer moms, curves I just don't mess with
Unless they've got some kids at home, they have to be flat-chested
Difference between me and Clegg? You'll never catch me restin'
All day I'm burning Dickheads online, I can't be bested
Malls and pools and parks and schools are where I get arrested
Helicopter parents, wasting all my time invested
Vote it up, bit prob. Why? Oh yeah you guessed it
Obsessed with making sure their children never get molested (get a life!)

Yes my name is Tito, Tito, Tito
My fiancé's quite a dumb hoe
For bringing Tito into her home
With her kid who's not very old

Tito, tito, tito, that's me, yo
I pull my van to the side "Hey kid you want a ride?"
You can be my child bride, hope you're fine with pedophilia
Drive across state lines, we'll pass time with Sadcast Media
Love that guy Joe Biden, he's my all-time favorite senator
Shitpost everyday, I'm the most prolific redditor
Don't like what I type? Write a letter to the editor
All my neighbors say I'm the most horrific predator

Dear Mr. Judge, I don't need incarceration
I'll stay at home and listen to my favorite cuck debatin'
Save your taxes dude, I don't want your psychotherapy
I'll volunteer at youth groups then I'll start a children's charity
My girl's a bad madre, she's not very choosey
She's rather risk her kid than be single for a few weeks
Bendejo's always yapping in her ear like
"You know what? You could just find a fat loser who DOESN'T think your kid's hot"

George thinks I'm good people, loves my TBD contributing
Even though I'm evil and got caught CP distributing
He's knows Tito's me though, plays my voicemails all day
Heheing with Ronny 'cause they love Bad Hombre

Yes yes my name it Tito Tito Tito
Honored guest of Maddox's show
Can't believe the judge sent me home
Should've hanged me 'til my neck broke

I insisted that he didn't (even though the record shows my mind is fucking sick and twisted)
They found my stash of discs with pics of nude newborns and infants
They also got my laptop with vids of kid victims in it
George you have to spin it, just pretend you never knew me
Maddox Militia - army of one - it is my duty
I'll fall on my sword so Madcast can continue thriving
Bad Hombre signing off as I crawl back into hiding

Tito Tito Tito

What are NPCs? Hmm, how can I explain it?
Herds of blue-haired sheep, easily manipulated
Their kryptonite is comedy, yeah they fuckin' hate it
So late at night at UCB is where they've congregated
Now UCB's a group of geeks and women who won't date 'em
These guys avert their eyes from thighs because it is degrading
"But hey I might get laid if they applaud this chick on stage and
laugh at her generic jokes and join in the complainin'"

"Knock-knock" Who's there? "Trump's a jerk, I hate him!"
"Blahblahblah vagina stuff" How have you not made it?
Hey, uh, I once owned a girl with a vagina
She made my cry, bruh "Did you get her fired?" I tried tuh
She wants a man I guess that's why we didn't work out (heh)
Three years later, still obsessed still so I sperged out...(hey!)
Because this ex left a wedding with my best friend (what?!)
They told me nothing happened but I'm pretty sure they held hands! (NOOOOOOOOO!)
Now they they all call me a C to the U to the C to the K
But UCB sided with me because I might be gay
Dick's so straight and white, let's face it
He must maintain a rape list

[chorus]
Hi I'm an NPC from UCB [x3]
You know what offends me? It's comedy!
Hi I'm an NPC from UCB [x3]
You know what offends me? Dick's comedy!

UCB Dean here, Dick I have to tell you
These jokes are too spicy, so I have to expel you
The Uptight Citizens Brigade just had a vote and
Unanimously decided we just can't take a joke man
Shoo! Vamoose! Skedaddle! You gotta go man!
Some bitch from Conde Naste has fuckin' got me by the gonads
Wait not so fast, one more thing I must ask 
Dick could you remove your profile pic? Yo that'd be so fab
Safespace comedy, we're real trend-setters
Look 'cause of your book we've been bombarded with letters 
"Dick hates women! Kick him out, you'd better!
Sincerely, a totally real journalist, Heather"

At first I wasn't sure 'cause you're usually just chillin'
But hey you sure do play a quite convincing Disney villain
"No one trolls quite like Dick, gives no fucks quite like Dick
No one eats the damned souls of dumb cucks quite like Dick"
Yikes! Delete all videos with Masterson's performances
There's nothing I find more offensive than enormous dicks
"I flaunted my big gorgeous tits once and he looked at me!"
"Oh my god!" "That's not okay!" "It's masculine toxicity!"

[chorus]

You dumb dipshits, job lynch mob kids
Have no business running comedy clubs, shit
One cunt's ticked off
Quick! Let's shoot our dick's off!
Anyone who jokes about the following will get doxxed
Chick politicians, non-Christian religions
Jokes at the expense of those who honor honor killings
*3 hours later* Is there anything we're missing?
Stupid balding cucks who took a vicious legal fisting
Gay bears, wheelchairs, fat guys with red hair
"What about free speech?"
....Don't care!
Please just love me, I'm dead inside :(
Oh I'm Mike, do you like my vocal fryyyyyyy?

Diversity is great but at UCB, it's skin deep
These pricks will get you fired if they do not like your comedy
"No one wants to book me!" Get a job "That's not happenin'!
"Alexa, what's the average salary for LA Activists?"

Chaos Cowboys and Indians, giggling Argentinians 
Piss-soaked Loli pricks and figbatdiggernicks
Liberals, conservatives, ankle-biting furry kids
Yeah we're all degenerates but Dickheads are diverse as shit

Top autists, top gays, post-op vajayjays
Consensual, bisexual, cocaine-fueled fourways
Facebook civil warlords, fedora-tipping redditors
Sorry no Titos allowed, we're not a fan of predators (fuck you Tito)
Otherwise it's all good, come one, come all
Liam Neeson give that penis back to Scott Zoloft (deep cut! https://www.reddit.com/r/TheDickShow/comments/aakvj9)
The NPCs at UCB are lacking creativity
Why can't they see we all just need to hate each other equally?

[If you want me to keep making songs on a regular basis, please consider throwing me a buck at patreon.com/kendollinhide]

Calling You A Cuck Is Hard To Do

Dick Show

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