test

3rdmix+

ratrace - 3rdmix+

tired and emotional
fried and unapproachable
the world really didn’t do its part
they spawned you in pressed space to start

linking chains and thinking brains
waking up in last nights pain
my head feels full and under pressure
i’ll fix it with whatever pills are hid in the dresser

i feel like an intruder on the world
im a boring useless stupid girl
i just want to say
since im always in your way
nothing really matters
when your right or wrong you’ll still get shattered

ohhhoo
oohhhhooo

you say i make your bad days worse
and my own guilt will be my curse
its hard to watch you not get better
when we’re both chasing thrills and pleasure

your hologram is in my dreams
im screaming baby stay with me
dont freak out,
but everybody has their doubts
im slowly losing everyone
cause im a social suicide gun
Oh Yeah!
* gun shot s*

my tongue went off in front of everyone
now i cant remember who i said i was
i gave you all my love
now my tears flow out like mud
you said i hate you and i hate your love

still sleeping
still dreaming
still in love
im still in love 
still sleeping
still dreaming
still in love
im still in love

Still Dreaming

ANGELMANE - P0pstar  Serial  Killerz + Graves

lyrics:

this is a bad track
listen if you want to hear shit talk
straight from the ass crack
but i have to tell em
If you hate me not my fault
Sucking dick is not assault
I wont get sober, not quitter
cause I relapse by default

but hey I know you had a bad day
I’ll meet you halfway
lalalalalalalalala
there’s nothing you bitches can say
ugly ass stripper with no fucking education
We tap each others shoulders and say that’s so raven

Im taking shots and writing jots and plugging watts in the wall
I’m writing down my horny thoughts and drinking shitty alcohol
so take your shot I’ll entertain it,
reinterpret it pervertedly 
these bitches love asking questions
what the fuck is a gaburgably?

im a shotgun in your mouth
swishin around
you love to gurgle me
all my exes still trying to murder me
i lost em, but i can take ten times the pain i caused them
i couldn’t fix him honestly cause i’m the fucking problem
oh god thats a hyperbole
you got some nerve like 
i laugh so hard its hurting me 
and while your at it can you suck it while your jerking me 
off, cause im barely legal baby
and it’s so easy to get turned on (oh)
where is that girl (where is that girl)
i used to be (I used to be)
i killed myself
just so we could meet

so what you wanted
what you wanted
what you wanted
what you wanted to do
was take bite
and take a picture
then you started to chew
i'm getting tired
getting tired
getting tired of you
so here's a clue (heads up)
cause im getting (fed up)

all your talking
and your stalking
and you're dropping your shoe
so i'm plotting
and i'm stopping
that's all i gotta do
you better keep your camera steady
cause i'm ready for you
so here's a quick (heads up)
cause my hammer (heads up)


oh yeah i told you so
i told you long ago
and if you gotta tell me something i don't wanna know
you know i love you though
i guess i kinda don't
but i can still pretend i like it when you tell me, no?
oh yeah i told you so
i told you that you’d go
you said you wanna take it take it take it  take it slow
oh yeah i told you so
i fucking knew it bro
oh

so what you wanted
what you wanted
what you wanted
what you thought you could do
was spend the night
and take a picture
like theres something to prove
i'm getting tired
getting tired
getting tired of you
so here's a clue (heads up)
cause im getting (fed up)


why you jockin
why you jockin
why you jockin on me
bitch are you talking
are you talking
you still talking to me?
i'm appalling
and i'm balling
Cause i'm causing the beef
so while you eat
(heads up)
bitch can you see
(heads up)

Heads Up

wishy washer

here we go now

Greetings

Chapter 11 Self Adhesive (IDM mix) [demo]

strung outtt

a bit trashy, a little naughty idk. WHO CAREZ N E MORE

SHOW STOPPER

Bird Whistle

Cherry Slash

This 8bit soundtrack from the RPG 
"Super Columbine Massacre)

A lot of people wanted the song so here it is.

(Original song: Marilyn Manson - Sweet Dreams)

SCM RPG Soundtrack (Sweet Dreams - Marilyn Manson) OST

lyrics:

please dont hate! do you miss me? i am sorry i am boring
i just wished i knew how many single times you’ve thought about me
im sorry that i disappointed when you saw me and i wasn’t
how u thought i was  i was worse  i am always always worse

you can tell me i am pretty but i wouldn’t ever get it
when i look at myself i dont see a person i see worthlessness
i carry guilt for liking you  i carry guilt for hurting too
the only reason i dont cut right now is cause i hope that you’ll be proud of me

im ugly  and im sticky like a snail or a slime
i mean i get it if you look at me you see a crying clown
i just dance around like freaky  trying to get your attention
and i think maybe you’ll hate me if i ever get happy

i hung out with some classmates and we drank beer and it was great
or like great how it can be great when you dont have a working brain
either way they smoked a joint and i took a tiny huff and i didn’t really hit me 
that im on my medication
it was stupid i got high  but i did and i know why
i was anxious and upset because im used to the alone time
vacations always fuck me up cause i need routines and stuff
so i get used to myself and i can’t let other people in

every weekends like a reset button pushing EVERY WEEK
cause i feel like i have just awoken from a hundred years of sleep
or an alien trying to navigate the human world
either way i dont understand anything about anything

and the mix of that with weed is the worst thing it could be
like my anxiousness locks down and opens up when i am sober see
thats many hours full of anxiety that i get in a final blow
which will kill me   but at that moment i had let my nervous go

so i let my guards down and i stopped pretending constantly
and i laughed when i laughed and i say what i think
and thats a good thing right? a good thing right? so why do i feel like this cause im better at pretending than being honest which is SAD

i just talk a lot about things i like thats my biggest flaw or maybe its alright
either way i do  i think i bored a few or maybe all of them  or maybe they’re my friends
either way they all drank beer  every day after that
and i was not invited WHICH IS DEFINITELY NOT PERSONAL

but TELL THAT TO MY BRAIN please i dare you  will you please
cause it rly doesn’t want to listen to what i say because it hates me
i can navigate the world and other people when im sad
because i know how to act the role of being the weirdo in the class

sitting in the back and always crying talking to my teachers
other people leave me alone because they know im weird and
its not that they dont like me   they just dont rly know me
so they can’t really form an opinion about a random strange somebody

but now i let people in  cause i am mentally more well
but the more i let people in the worse i actually get 
what the fuck is up with this cycle
thats a weird way for it to go
like shouldn’t other people make me excited
not wanna dig myself into a hole

but i hate being known
yet i love to know others
i wish i could be mysterious but i feel like i am translulcent cause i
always  say what i mean  which is good right? i think? right?
im just anxious that people have perceptions of me in their mind


but please dont hate me i am lonely other people really scare me
theres so few people i want to spend more time with you are one of them
i want to kill myself but you said: i would never be ok again
and then i didn’t want to  is that fucked up pressure to put on you?

yet i wouldn’t ever tell you  i dont know maybe one day
that i actually believe that you’re part of the reason i am here today
i just want to be more ok   like the people who drank beers today
the people i can kind of reach but its like my arms are just too short  for me to grab onto a sleeve and hold on  tight enough to not let go

Long Song

lyrics:

i clog the toilet when i flush cus my apartments old and fucked up
i’ve stopped worrying too much yet i still worry quite a lot
i think im lonely but im not im just bored and i should shut up
i think im angry but its stuff like life that makes it hard to live it right

i know im not a monster but i still feel like a failure
theres a ratio thats off of me pretending to be healthier
i know im not the worst but it is not like i am good
i just know i could be better if i tried to be like you

i know i know 
you say that i am great in fact you say it constantly
i feel after years of that it should’ve somewhat hit me
i am better now than ever but i still feel really scared
cus now i have something to lose if im not prepared

and now and now
i burn my tongue on soup and scratch the scab for days on end
i spit blood into the sink and it makes me want to kill myself 
i fuck up my own body to feel good for a sec
and theres if proof of that  if you just look down on my legs

i was smoking outside when my cuts were peaking out my shorts
before i got them covered up a stranger sorta saw
it was a father and his child and he just gave a pity smile
it wasn’t really anything but made me want to cry

relapsing is hard but i haven’t talked about it after all
ive done this shit for so long i just dont think there is more for me
to say about how hard it is to only can relax when i
am digging a boxcutter into the skin on my thigh

and slitting slitting in the skin i always carry round with me
shitty shitty how this is the final skin ill ever see
i feel feel it hen the blood is dripping down my pantyhose
its fitting fitting feels like this is something i deserve and so

the toilet doesn’t flush and i am sitting on the bathroom floor
stopped cutting in the bath cus it just makes me want to do it more
think im tired but im not i just haven’t eaten anything today
and life is tiring as fuck but i am doing it my way

im an addict for the pain  and i lie when i complain
about the scars im covered in  the knife i carry with me everyday
i think my sentence is the pain   and i like to hurt myself
im not unhappy all the time  but i feel like its the only way
to feel like i am in control   to get rid of all the thoughts
thats why i cut or smoke or squeeze the dirt from all my pores
its so much easier to hurt yourself than think of what you’re going thru
so i would rather sit braindead and bleed out every  afternoon

Chapter 11

dumb as rocks

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