Name: femtanyl - ATTACKING VERTICAL (ESTR0GEM C0V3R) by ESTR0GEM
Duration: 2 min 10 s
Description: Haii! This is the Attacking Vertical remix I made for yt!

A Dark Zone

GET OUT!

DELTARUNE REMIX! >:3

Youtube mirror: https://youtu.be/ZaqT6pnqX4s

SP4MT0N

Lyrics:

THIS BITCH TAKES MY MONEY
NOW I CANT PAY THEM BACK
I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
THEY'RE GONE TAKE ME ROUND BACK

MY GUTS WILL SPILL
MY BRAINS WILL 'SPLODE
MY CHICKEN WILL FRY
THE WALLS WILL PAINTED WITH MY BLOOD

LET ME CHANGE MY FUCKING PASSPORT
DO I LOOK LIKE A HIM NO? LET ME GO TO FRANCE.
CANT HAVE SHIT IF YOU FEEL WRONG
SHUT UP AND CONFORM YOU DUMB BITCH
WELL HOW ABOUT I KILL YOU THEN MYSELF

THEY FEAR US THEY LOATHE US THEY WANT US GONE
I CANT EVEN GO TO THE BATHROOM WITHOUT PEOPLE STARING
WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS WORLD
LET ME BE
LET ME LIVE

I CANT DEAL WITH THIS SHIT I MIGHT AS WELL DIE

(sampled rap)
Fire, fire gonn' burn
Look into the light its time we gonn' learn
Raise up the conciousness its our turn
Every time bring the heat with one word
Fire, fire gonn' burn
Decrease the wickedness here upon earth
We gonna hear with the world(?) its our turn
Every time I speak on the mic with one word bring

THIS DYSPHORIA'S FUCKIN' KILLING ME
I HAVE NO SELF CONTROL
IF YOU LEAVE IT TOO LONG
YOU'LL ALL LIVE TO REGRET IT

DEEP DOWN INSIDE
THOSE TRANSPHOBES FUCKING ROT
I CANT FUCKING COPE
THIS SHITS DRIVING ME INSANE

MY REALITIES SLIPPING
I'M LOSING MY GRIP
I'M GETTING SICK OF THIS SHIT
I WISH I WAS DEAD

BLOOD? GUTS?
I DON'T CARE!!
SERVE THEM UP ON A SILVER PLATE.
EITHER THAT OR ILL FUCKING DO IT MYSELF!

(Hello?)

FUCK OFF!!

SP1LL THE1R GUTS!!

Hai! 

Lyrics:
COME ON AND TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT
AND TELL ME WHAT YOU NEED
'CAUSE I DON'T GIVE A FLYING FUCK
WHATEVER IT COULD BE
YOU'RE A MESS OF INCONSISTENCIES
YOU HATE ME? DESPISE ME? 
OH BOO HOO HOO!!
COME AT ME IF YOU MEAN IT. 
ALL BARK AND NO BITE!
SITTING IN YOUR ROOM TYPING INSULTS ON THE PHONE.
COMPENSATING FOR THE LACK OF HAPPINESS GOING ON IN. YOUR. LIFE.

(you are not fluttershy. you are a lying, cheating manipulative ass bitch. okay. fluttershy likes rainbows and flowers and bubbles and shit. you like cocaine and alcohol and being a cheating whore. like that time you cheated on your boyfriend and you didn't tell him? and you thought that he wouldn't find out? bitch we know. okeh?)

you got me rambling, scrambling, punishing myself
thinking I'm some sorta cutting board for you to abuse?
what the fuck did i do wrong?
do you wanna treat me like a pet ?
and strip my soul away?
you treat me like a toy
then you throw me away
and its so fucking stressful
that its causing all these blood clot ruptures
and if i don't take care of them now
then i think they might explode
like a fucking atom bomb

BLOOD CL0T RUPTURES

'Bonemeal' conceptualized by me and drawn by my friend Skeli. (we came up with the design together!)
lyrics in caps were written by my friend Tucker!

BLOOD CL0TS

Wrote this song about a person I had a crush on a few years ago.
Got my friend to do vocals and he fucking killed it!

Lyrics:
How long will this go on?
I don't think I can keep going
What the fuck am I doing wasting my love on you?
The last thing I want is to see you fall into abuse
Your stupid fucking life has been repeating in a loop
I want you to know my love is true
And I just wanna smile at you  
I love you so much but
Cant you see the signs? It's so obvious they don't care for you!

Have my knife on the side
Knowing you don't love me
Trust me I'd give everything so I could treat you justly
Give each second of my life so I could hear your heartbeat
These incredible feelings
They just wont go away

Why do you love those girls?
They only cause hurt
I guess I got my hopes up
You're so far gone you don't care
While I'm right here hurting
From all your mistakes
I'm thinking I could kill myself and put myself in hell



Tearing gnawing rotting from the inside
Fates unwound ever since you fucking died
Left me here to weigh my sins
The sin of not letting you in

Forgive my soul for turning a blind eye
Left out on the corner, out to die
I now feel shame for not seeing your light
What should i do to make things right

The light beckons me into the dark
To snuff out my existing spark
This prison of flesh keeping me from clarity
The only way out is now the end of me

A sin I couldn't see, a sin I didn't write
Draining my sanity into the night
By her choice I'll put the knife to my wrist
Maybe then she'll be missed

Some lyrics written by my friend Toir.
Dark's lyrics written by himself.
Cover art, instrumental and vocals done by me.

W4STED L0VE (feat. DarkR3volution)

7 Stages is an EP I started by accident. I had another album planned, but this EP formed itself. Earlier this year, a complicated and abusive relationship I was in for a while ended. A month after the relationship ended, I was sexually assaulted by my former closest friend shortly after I confided in them and finally felt comfortable enough to tell someone about the instances of abuse I went through in my relationship. Both these things were absolutely crushing to me. I felt like I lost everything in the span of a month. I began writing songs for myself to cope with the difficult feelings that were coming up and this EP was born accidentally. I did not know if I wanted to post this, or if I would feel safe being so vulnerable, but I feel it is an important part of my personal healing not to suffer alone or in silence any longer.

This EP shows all the emotions of going through and recovering from those events. Messy emotions, having complicated feelings for your abusers, toying with the idea of regressing just to be 'loved' once more, etc. As the EP progresses through the stages of grief, it becomes a reflection of my personal rise into power, self healing, proper boundary setting, reclaiming myself, and coming into an era of self love after not having that for myself my entire life.

If you have been through or are going through similar experiences, know that you are heard and that you are very important and worthy of healthy love, friendships, and relationships. It DOES get better, I promise.

THANATOSIS

7 Stages is an EP I started by accident. I had another album planned, but this EP formed itself. Earlier this year, a complicated and abusive relationship I was in for a while ended. A month after the relationship ended, I was sexually assaulted by my former closest friend shortly after I confided in them and finally felt comfortable enough to tell someone about the instances of abuse I went through in my relationship. Both these things were absolutely crushing to me. I felt like I lost everything in the span of a month. I began writing songs for myself to cope with the difficult feelings that were coming up and this EP was born accidentally. I did not know if I wanted to post this, or if I would feel safe being so vulnerable, but I feel it is an important part of my personal healing not to suffer alone or in silence any longer.

This EP shows all the emotions of going through and recovering from those events. Messy emotions, having complicated feelings for your abusers, toying with the idea of regressing just to be 'loved' once more, etc. As the EP progresses through the stages of grief, it becomes a reflection of my personal rise into power, self healing, proper boundary setting, reclaiming myself, and coming into an era of self love after not having that for myself my entire life.

If you have been through or are going through similar experiences, know that you are heard and that you are very important and worthy of healthy love, friendships, and relationships. It DOES get better, I promise.


Haii! This is the Attacking Vertical remix I made for yt!

femtanyl - ATTACKING VERTICAL (ESTR0GEM C0V3R)

transfem making fucked up music

Logo designed by me, drawn by gundrin.

femtanyl - ATTACKING VERTICAL (ESTR0GEM C0V3R)

ESTR0GEM

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