to love me is to suffer me

God's Country (demo) - Ethel Cain (solo Version)

South Alabama (God's Country Demo) - Ethel Cain

dust bowl (demo) by ethel cain

Ethel Cain-Truckers Chapel(extended prod.postumo)

Days fly by spent wasting time in my mother's garden green
My sister's speaking old poetry they memorized never knowing what it means
I could stay outside forever counting stars on summer fields fore' I bike to Dowlin' street
Its simple when it's over and i'm happy
Painting murals on the sign but it's downtown in the scorching sun
I tried all summer but I hated the way it looks so I never got it done
I walked the train tracks with a boy that I loved but turns out I was tired of being alone
So when we reached the end and I said goodbye and I was by myself when I got home

Ethel Cain ~ Perry

lyrics:

I sing the lord’s euthanasia blues
When I take you and your brother in the back pew
Drive into the median, keep myself from eating and wonder why I feel so sick
Tradition’s ligature marks always yellow through


I lied when I said I didn’t want you
In no time, you’ll forget the way we were supposed to be
Asking what I’m on this time, holding on to you like I do
Like we’re the only people in the world god left to mind to

Two drowning coals won’t ever light
But if I ask you to, you’ll warm the night


If I want you like I said I’d never do
I would hold my breath and sit down next to you
Terrified you’ll bite the hand that needs you
And right now I need you
I don’t know what happened
I don’t know what happened
I was young and sweet
And then something happened
Something overwhelming
Something everlasting

Time drags on
I hate him for the time he’s gone
I’ve been here for weeks, I’ve been here for years
I’ve been here too long
I forgot what stop means
Either I drink it or the boat sinks
It’s easy for him to get out of me
What I’ve been praying will get out of me

Will I always be crying during sex with you
All my dreams take place in heaven where it’s quiet, lying next to you
Heavy breathing and sighs, bruises between my thighs, look me deep In my eyes like I’m a river worth wading
And if I’m crying, it’s because I’m in love

[Outro]
And I could love you if I tried
And I’m trying
I’m trying, I’m trying, I’m trying

crying during sex - ethel cain

Stomping Ground - White Silas

lyrics:

I used to meet you once my dad was in bed
In your room at the motel down by i-10
You've been there since i met you, you still haven't left yet
It's as good of a home in this town that you can get 

We'd go out to the bar, get fucked up til my makeup smeared
Then come back, do whatever we wanted, cause god can't see us here
We would climb to the rooftop, dance naked, and talk about jumping off
Then climb down, let you do what you want to me, don't stop

I woke up on that sunday to news that they got you
We both knew it would end on the day that they caught you
You shot yourself in the head as they battered your door through
"Highway killer" babe, that's what they called you

I skipped town, i don't wanna be seen 
If they come around asking questions to my family
About why there's all these traces of me
On your dirty motel sheets 
I'm sorry, baby 
I'm sorry
I'm sorry
Please don't hate me

If i had never met you, i would graduate next week 
If i had never met you, i never would have seen the bodies by the creek
If i had never met you, i'd never know how bad a corpse stinks
But now you're gone, and the light's back on at the motel reading vacancy

vacancy - white silas

Verse 1]
Baby we're all out of places to go
Now that home's all gone
We burned that old son of a bitch down
We smashed out the windows and we pissed in the lawn 'cause
Happy's always been the dream
But we need to start waking up
I could follow you out there, but just hold on

[Chorus 1]
(Wait, just stay)
Your face is all fucked up from taking the world by the teeth
And there's blood on your hands, you don't know whose it is
Oh baby, come back in

[Spoken]
I've always wondered why bad things happen to good people
But then you told me you know I'm a good person and you've always been a bad thing
So now I wonder if those good people are really all that good
And if these bad things are really all that bad
I mean, all I really know nowadays is I've got you and you've got me and everything else
I don't know
I don't know anymore
I don't know

[Chorus 2]
That white horse is long gone
But we're moving on
We just keep moving on

independence day - ethel cain

[Verse 1: Aelyx]
Heavy eyes, face stressin’ [?] in the speakerphone
I fell asleep, and I woke up to a dial tone
I miss the words that you said when we didn't speak
You told me when you left you'd always be with me

[Verse 2: Aelyx, Both]
I cut the sadness out in the evergreen
I thought I cut you now, and you can't ever leave
But you let me walk away, you didn't say a fuckin' word
Had to grab my own spine and pretend it didn't hurt

[Chorus: Ethel Cain]
It was a wake up call
The dead of night and I'm screaming in the hall
Can we just go back to before I knew?
It'd be my first new year
Without you
It was a wake up call
That night I put both of my fists through the wall
In hopes that I could pull you back through
It's gonna be a damn long year
Without you

[Vocalisation]

[Chorus: Ethel Cain]
It was a wake up call, and I miss you but
I never miss the butterflies that you left dead in my gut
I poured that cracked glass full 'till it overflowed
It's just a sign of the times, now that I'm letting you go
It's just a wake up call to put you to rest
Crying knowing this is my last time watching you get dressed
Holding that empty glass and the clock, he says
I'm going home screaming "Fuck it, I wish you the best!"

[Outro: Ethel Cain]
It’s just a wake up call
(It’s just a wake up call)
(It’s just a wake up call)
It’s just a wake up call
It’s just a wake up call
[Vocalisation]



Wake up Call (demo) Aelyx & Ethel Cain

Age Of Delilah

Verona

lyrics:

You spent your whole life trying to be tough
Cause your parents married pain to love
But you go all white at the sight of blood
And Jesus knows that you've seen enough
Something happened back when you were young
It kills you but you won't tell me what it was
Sleeping on the floor in your grandma's room
Too tired to cry, too weak to even move
You're so scared you'll make the mistakes you
Had to watch your daddy make that
Took your mama and everything away
But it's not your fault and I don't need help
Cause these bruises on my body, I gave to myself
You're allowed to take care of yourself
25 and you're still crying in your sleep
Scared the world is out to get you
And you've tried every bottle but you're in too deep
Cause you don't know any better, how could you?
And the fear is there when we're in your bed
And I start to cry and you think it's something you did
But baby I'm alright
I'm alright
You're so scared you'll make the mistakes you
Had to watch your daddy make that
Took your mama and everything away
But it's not your fault and I don't need help
Cause these bruises on my body, I gave to myself
You're allowed to take care of yourself
Last night I dreamed that you had gone away
Woke up in tears and stayed in bed all day
And I'm terrified that I'll lose everyone I have
That I'll watch them leave and wait but they won't come back
You're so scared you'll make the mistakes you
Had to watch your daddy make that
Took your mama and everything away
But it's not your fault and I don't need help
Cause these bruises on my body, I gave to myself
You're allowed to take care of yourself

Age Of Delilah

Ethelcain12

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