Oh my god dude come on with this constant beautiful song shit man you got some insane talent every one of you’re songs has be able to brung tears to my eyes its amazing

Falling Without a Parachute

'Bitter Blue '
coming soon...

Prod:
@93feetofsmoke

MERCH: http://lilxlotus.storenvy.com/products/18507607-lil-lotus-noose-longsleeve

And i still remember 
Your hands in my hair
And the fireplace in December
And time's forever changing
But i still feel the same for you
I just wish you felt the same way too

I don't wanna waste you time 
And i know you have a better life
But it's stuck inside my head 
And i don't wanna leave my bed

So just tell me you want me 
Tell me you need me
Tell me you'll come back
And you're never leaving

I was eighteen when you loved me
And now i know I'm twenty-something
But I'm still hoping that you'd come home
And tell me everywhere that you've gone

eighteen (prod. 93FEETOFSMOKE)

your backyard

ＨＯＷ　ＬＯＮＧ　ＨＡＳ　ＩＴ　ＢＥＥＮ　ＳＩＮＣＥ　Ｉ　
ＳＡＮＧ　ＹＯＵＲ　ＳＯＮＧ？

i wanna thank every single one of you from the bottom of my heart for every single like, comment, message, etc. that you go out of your way to send to me. it's incredible to know you guys are out there. i know this is different from my usual direction, but bare with me. i love you guys.

peep the music video here
https://youtu.be/VoUc7Fp9rQU

//わたしは、あなたを愛しています//

♡

visuals

into the trees

[VERSE 1]
When every thought brings so much pain.
It's hard to explain.
I don't wanna feel anything.
It's hard to explain.
I don't wanna change.
Something in my brain,
Telling me to hate.
All I ever say,
I don't wanna change.
Something In my brain,
Won't go away.

[CHORUS]
Far from home, where you'll find me,
made my bed and i'll finally lay in it.
Lay in it.
Far from home, where you'll find me,
made my deathbed and ill finally lay in it.
Ill lay in it.

[VERSE 2]
Backpacked on my own,
rather be fucked up all alone,
Airplane mode on my iPhone,
Running from a careless path I wish I'd never known,
But I know that...
Everyone that I believed in was holding me back,
Matter of fact,
I wasn't leaving because what I needed was space that I lacked,
I got off track,
Don't wanna do it by myself,
But I don't want no help,
The only way's to runaway
and write a story to tell.

[SPOKEN WORD]
Made a promise that I'd love myself
And a promise that I'd break it.
Made a promise that I'd get better 
And a promise that I'd fake it.
Promised myself that I'd give it up,
Give up everything you hated.
Made a promise that I'd enjoy my life, and a promise that I'd take it.

[CHORUS X3]

deathbed

@familypet

shinigami: you said thisll never last so now im falling apart
my face is feeling numb again 
a shattered soul
dont let me go
you killed me first
im sure you know

she said thisll never last now im left in the dark
you saved me from myself again 
after the fall
i knew it all along
i never asked for this at all

you shouldve never let me in at all
now all you can do is watch me crawl
away
isolate myself
and i still can feel it all

and you can see the devil in my gaze
i think its best you stay away from me
im weak why cant you see this

familypet: thinkin back i fucked it up
my brothers just don't give a fuck
we skate until it's dark enough
to smoke and drink
we act don't think
don't think we act our age with it
i know i always ruin shit
i hope i never ruin this
i hope we'll always stay like this
putting each other in hospital beds
remember last summer when i broke my leg
doing a jump at the gap at 18th
remember the time that i knocked out your teeth
i'm glad that you always forgave me
these are the stories and memories that made me
i know i wasn't worth saving
i was just crazy
can't help the fact that i love misbehaving

i never asked for this [feat. familypet]

video - https://youtu.be/9mTGTjh39Kc

mix/master - @youngburial

nowadays I wonder
if you cared at all
I'm anxious from the topic
and the adderall

if I tell you that I'm sorry
and its all my fault
will you fuck me when its over
and the pills wear off 

lately I don't want no new friends
really I jus wan blow my head
maybe it's drugs I'm missing
really I'm numb to all this

outside I look calm
but in my head I'm fucked
like why you think
I always keep that bottle tucked

they talk about my life
as if they're living it
like we didn't crawl thru mud
to get to past where we been

nowadays i just am not sure
still giving everything
still need more

nowadays i just am not sure
I'm not sure
I'm not sure

nowadays I wonder
if you cared at all
I'm anxious from the topic
and the adderall

if I tell you that im sorry
and its all my fault
will you Fuck me when its over
and the pills wear off

lately I don't want no new friends
really I jus wan blow my head
mostly it's just drugs I'm missing
really I'm just numb to all this

anxious from the topic & the adderall

Lie Again Ft. Yesterday & Moonlet (prod. Yung Flex) out on spotify

prod. @4evrgone

I don't know who i am
i don't trust who you are
lately all i can do is pray to the stars
that this bleak observation of everything i see
might one day turnaround 
i need to get some fucking help

im fucking sick of myself 
fucking sick of how my brain has a mind for itself
consider this an open letter you wont read for yourself
yeah of course im talking bout whos typing these words all down

looking more and more like deadman in this wonderland town
looking more and more like deadman in this wonderland town

leave me in the past like your bad dreams
dont care if your home in the morning
im betting its best to ignore me
its worthless for us to keep pushing
leave me in the past like your bad dreams
dont care if your home in the morning
im betting its best to ignore me
its worthless for us to keep pushing
im fucking sick of myself 

im fucking sick of myself
fucking sick of how my brain has a mind for itself
consider this an open letter you wont read for yourself
yeah of course im talking bout whos typing these words all down

leave me in the past like your bad dreams
dont care if your home in the morning
im betting its best to ignore me
its worthless for us to keep pushing
leave me in the past like your bad dreams
dont care if your home in the morning
im betting its best to ignore me
its worthless for us to keep pushing

sick of myself (prod. 4evr)

rip me open w/ shinigami & 93FEETOFSMOKE

MUSIC VIDEO: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pMS--FQ5yxM

w/ @barrenwaste

yeah girl, i get it
im all too concerned
with the lesson that i never really learned
you aint somethin that i ever saw as a cure
so get lost
or get with it
this loves been finished
my hearts on fire
cuz i dont know how to quit it
 
and if i ever had a second to take back
id save it for someone
who aint lookin for payback 
i thought u loved me
but it isnt the same
so ill stay fucked up
tryna numb all my pain
 
just take me back
found my own little slice of home
itll never be the same
but i feel grown
aint nobody lovin u like i did
hearts offline
and my heads been split
hands on the wheel
runnin off of the road
you can have my life
if i got ur soul
same old shit
with a brand new bitch
fuck this life
im over it
 
if by now you didn’t know
i prefer to spend my days alone
held captive only by these four walls
haven’t answered a single call
all night
been dealing with a hell
of an internal gripe
triplet flows
keeping this brain alive
with how much im smoking
the future aint looking too bright
can barely remember
to write down a line
people keep asking
no i aint fine
dreading a pointless
unfulfilling life
somebody come and
take this mic
i could rant and rave
with all my might
dont wanna be too specific
na this shit aint even written
i can shit out a rhyme
that you call your best work
ya lady still love me
man i can be such a jerk
i take out my anger on
all in my path
ruining friendships
i never had
losing a loved one
that ill never grasp
dealing with the pain
that comes with it all
just me n the homies
fuck it we ball

https://linktr.ee/yesterday.nj

Follow me <3

girls don't like me (prod. yesterday)

mitchell
booking/contact: badghostinternet@gmail.com

deathbed

familypet

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