[PROD. MEEJ. X JVCXB]

I fell in love with them commas.
She fell in love with a monsta.
She way too deep in the drama.
I’m way too deep in the trauma.
They all tell me they can’t understand.
They all tell me to stick to the plan.
But I think I might switch to another one-
All alone, loaded gun in my hand.
Pull the trigger; I’ll bleed out instead.
I want death; Only thought in my head.
She want sex; Only thought about head.
All my demons; They beg to be fed.
All my siblings they watch down above me.
Knowing that, I should probably feel lucky.
When they died, handed me their anointing. 
Who am I to throw it all away?
…Hear them whisper: “Would you care to join me?”
I feel nothing when they say they love me.
Can’t believe it, I feel like I’m nothing.
Slap my hand away, call me disgusting.
Slap my hand: “Don’t you ever dare touch me.”
But she took mine and wanted to trust me.

It’s the devil, he plays with my mind and my thoughts-
It’s a battle I’ll mentally lose.
I’ve been fighting my anguish, been fighting my joy-
I need something else to lose.
And despite all the shame I keep hidden away, I could finally tell her the truth.
And the words that she told me had lifted a weight, I finally got something to prove.
I traded my weapons for knowledge.
I traded my love for a lie.
I traded my ego for guidance and balance.
I had to let go of my pride.
Every song that I write is a story-
Of the words that I keep in my mind.
Compiled with the hurt in my heart that I can’t recollect how to heal from inside.
Does she want me, dead or alive?
For too long, only I could decide.
When I die anyway, play this song at my funeral.
It’ll let you know I tried.
No matter how many betrayed-
I always forgave what they dealt.
As well as the ones I betrayed-
But the one I could never forgive was myself.


Die Groundwalker-
Die Groundwalker-
Die.
The Hatred;
It lives within me still.
I had no choice, I was casted aside.
I was-
6 years old in the 1st grade.
Top of the slide, it was hot outside.
I was pushed from the slide and landed in the mulch, it was piercing my skin.
I felt like Anakin.
Alma J Brown as my Alma Mater-
It don’t even exist no more.
No surprise.
They all knew what they did to me way back when-
No one batted an eye.
I was stomped on, I was spit on-
Barely alive.
It hurt so much, but for some reason I couldn’t close my eyes.
I was on the ground, I looked over; 
Teacher stared at me. 
Then she walked inside.
They all walked inside.
As I laid there all alone, I said I’d take a life.
And if it wasn’t there’s-
Then it’d be mine.

So I’m sorry I ran out of love.
And I’m sorry I wasn’t enough for you.
I hope you keep your trust-
For someone who knows how to value-
You, more than just lust.
For someone who knows how to value-
You, more than just lust.


I find it funny, I turned to the streets.
The streets turned against me too.
And now that I look at it, I cant blame them.
I woulda hurt me too.
I wanna kill me too.
I wanna kill them too.


When I was younger…
I was told to remember many things.
Always remember to fear.
Always remember I can never change.
Always remember I’m filth.
Always remember-
…Always remember that I am nothing.

Shoot off the hip fire-
Spitfire-
Maguire-
Swinging the MJ like Toby.
I’m active.
She wanna get higher-
Good liar.
I wanna inspire.
A-M-I-R-I on fabric.
Slept on the floor with the heater and mattress.
Front of the house while I’m beating her Back in.
Front Of the House in the Mix, out the backend.
I was a child, I succumbed to the madness.

I’m not sorry I ran out of love.
Im not sorry that I plan to kill myself-
I hate myself too much.
I’m sorry for ever believing in me-
The world around me will burn.
That’s a promise from me-
The Only Son.

———The litter’s very own runt.

THE RUNT OF THE LITTER. | (JANUARY 11TH - EMERGENCE DAY.) [PROD. MEEJ. X JVCXB]

MEEJ.