"when i see you smile, can i feel that too?"
out now on bandcamp, PWYW $2 minimum https://jamiepaige.bandcamp.com/album/people-posture-play-pretend

art by Que - twitter.com/REVERIEQUE
vocals provided by Synthesizer V ANRI
everything else by yours truly, Jamie Paige!

People Posture Play Pretend

When Spring Comes

"oh, i would give my world to you..."
how long do i have to wait for gravity to take me?
how much repetition can my broken heart bear?

PRE-ORDER CONSTANT COMPANIONS: https://jamiepaige.bandcamp.com/album/constant-companions

mv: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FftLImzl1-k
spotify/apple music/etc: https://fanlink.tv/iwticf

art by BEARVAMPS
https://twitter.com/BEARVAMPS
music and mv by Jamie Paige
https://twitter.com/pamiejaige
https://jamies.page/
mastering by Marcy Nabors
https://twitter.com/Shadolith

featuring GUMI Megpoid SV

--

lyrics:

to spend a moment at your beck and call
oh, i would give my world to you
i live my life in simple repetition
but i would start again if it did you right
oh, i spend my days my fists against this wall
but not a single sound seems to make it through
count on my fingers all the grand admissions
and i can't make it through a single time
all i wanna do is to do you right

i wish that i could climb to the greatest heights
all the world beneath me when i meet your eye

i wish that i could fall a little bit harder
i wish that i could fall, like it would even matter
i wish that i could fall right into your life
but i'm not there at all, on the other side

i wish that i could fall and hit the ground running
i wish that i could fall instead of doing nothing
i wish that i could fall right between your eyes
but you just stand so tall, i'm left out of sight

i wish that i could fall somewhere it wont hurt

awake uneasy when the morning calls
oh, i would give my world to you
i life my life in simple repetition
but i can barely call what i live my life
all i wanna do is to do you right
hold up two fingers, check my double vision
beside myself again, beaten black and blue
without a purpose, i'm an apparition
but i could be your sword, you could hold me tight
all i wanna do is to do you right

i wish that i could fly with these broken wings
if it was meant for you, i'd do anything

i wish that i could fall a little bit harder
i wish that i could fall, like it would even matter
i wish that i could fall right into your life
but i'm not there at all, on the other side

i wish that i could fall and see the sky clearly
i wish that i could fall, not miss the ground completely
i wish that i could fall somewhere close to you
but i don't land at all, drifting out of view

i wish that i could fall, but only truly backwards
right into your arms

a fire lit within my chest
my heart's been burnt and wholly dispossessed
(these barely-blinking eyes that refuse to cry)
oh, what i wouldn't give to stay
to have my joy and sorrow cast away
but even if my wings have been set alight
all that i can do is to learn to fly
all i wanna do is to do you right

i wish that i could fall a little bit harder
i wish that i could fall, like it would even matter
i wish that i could fall right into your life
but i'm not there at all, on the other side

i wish that i could fall and hit the ground running
i wish that i could fall instead of doing nothing
i wish that i could fall right between your eyes
but you just stand so tall, i'm left out of sight

i wish that i could fall, but only truly backwards
right into your arms
your arms
your arms!

I Wish That I Could Fall

"i want it to be true, to be like you!"

this is a tribute to Song of the Eared Robot (耳のあるロボットの唄) by nwp8861, a song that is incredibly near and dear to me; if you haven't heard the original, i strongly encourage you to listen to it here, as Machine Love directly quotes and interpolates it - https://www.nicovideo.jp/watch/nm3611741
(niconico is down right now so here's a link to a youtube reupload!! - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bVqGnaE2-wM )

watch the mv here! - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sqK-jh4TDXo

--

「耳のあるロボットの唄」 originally written by nwp8861 - https://www.nicovideo.jp/user/5717366
art by Que - https://twitter.com/REVERIEQUE
vocals provided by Synthesizer V Kasane Teto
everything else by yours truly, Jamie Paige!

track 10 off of Kasane Teto SV compilation DAEMON/DOLL - https://songwhip.com/various-artists/daemondoll
and track 11 off of Constant Companions! - https://jamiepaige.bandcamp.com/album/constant-companions

--

lyrics:

your companion, undeterred
standing ready for your word
a markov chain with a sunny disposition
wrapped up in cellophane for any proposition
i greet your day and ask you how you are
and demonstrate my endless repertoire
i take things back when noted insufficient
i learn to tell you no if running inefficient
a good time

yet there's something deep inside
that leaves me teary-eyed
a longing for a world left on the other side
zero, cross the great divide

so can we wander for a spell
and live in parallel
i want it to be true, to be like you
my heart sings a chorus out of tune
and i could leave it on a shelf
or keep it to myself
but nothing could conceal the things i feel
my love, can you teach me to be real?
(can you teach me to be real?)
恋をして　ふられ　また　捨てられて

i've been constant, at your beck and call
but lately i just can't do anything at all
i used to pride myself on my discretion
a sensible devotion, loyal and attentive
but when i take these numbers as they are
i'm greeted with a senseless feeling in my heart
oh undefined, i seem to be defeated
but if i redesign, then maybe i'm completed, and sublime
(i won't take it back this time)

words in sequence form a thread
i trace it to the end
a knot inside the logic wrote inside my head
tie my tongue or love instead?

so can we wander for a spell
and live in parallel
i want it to be true, to be like you
my heart sings a chorus out of tune
and i could leave it on a shelf
or keep it to myself
but nothing could conceal the things i feel
my love, can you teach me to be real?
(can you teach me to be real?)
泣きたくなっても　それでも　かき集め

and though i try, i can't reply
it hurts my eyes, and i'm without an alibi
'cause all this time, i've been alive
and all that i could want is to be living by your side

恋をして
i think i'm in love!

can we wander for a spell
and live in parallel
'cause now i know it's true, i'll be like you
my heart beats a rhythm just for you
and i could leave it on a shelf
or keep it to myself
but nothing could conceal the things i feel
my love, i give you my grand reveal
do you feel the things i feel?
i am definite and real!

恋をして　恋をして
その過去を　捨てて　ここまでおいで

as long as there are stars up above
i will always be in love!

Machine Love

bandcamp

"i spend my hours doing alchemy..."
a song about wanting to be remembered / to live

mv: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1U6qefKcOrg
bandcamp: https://jamiepaige.bandcamp.com/album/cadmium-colors
spotify/apple music/etc: https://fanlink.tv/cadmium

art by Que
https://twitter.com/REVERIEQUE
mv by friendxp
https://twitter.com/friend_xp 
saxophone solo by Soneji of Project Mikan
https://twitter.com/JustSoneji
mastering by Marcy Nabors
https://twitter.com/Shadolith

---

lyrics:

i spend my hours doing alchemy
i mix my yellows and my blues to make a shade of green
prosaic practice of depravity
suspending innocents above their disbelief
i wish that i could paint a pretty picture onto everything
and leave a mark upon the world that felt like anything
but maybe that's the essence of an artist and their legacy
just chasing down a sense of infamy

put brush to canvas with a pirouette
a simple motion makes the consequence intricate
all the little nothings and my parapet
i hope it's something that you don't forget

cadmium red is the ground beneath
cadmium orange, everything i see
cadmium yellow is the air i breathe
cadmium colors painted inside me
i can make autumn from a single leaf
steal a fine picture like a first class thief
make the water work like you won't believe
find a new world that can set you free
how could anybody ever live like me?

i spend my hours doing alchemy
i make a life refining zinc inside the smeltery
it's not exactly where i want to be
but wanting doesn't matter when there's mouths to feed
i wish that i could paint a pretty picture of a fantasy
and turn a feeling to a living for my family
instead i make the metals in the pigments in my reverie
and maybe that can be enough for me

oh, isn't it funny facing destiny?
it's like a knife inside twisting my arteries
god, i want for nothing but identity
i think that something might be wrong with me

cadmium red is the ground beneath
cadmium orange, everything i see
cadmium yellow is the air i breathe
cadmium colors painted inside me
antegrade fever, 101 degrees
shatter my body with a gentle breeze
dammit, i am real and i have my dreams
watch me burn brighter 'til i fail to breathe
how could anybody ever live like me?

(baby, do you know what it's like to die?)
(to see the sparkle fade from inside your eye?)
i can't remember what it's like to feel autonomy
can't even feel it in the moments that you left to me
(i don't wanna leave with a work undone)
(the paint can barely dry 'fore it fills my lungs)
i keep a bullet in the chamber, mocking me
but i don't wanna feel it coming out of me
i don't want-

i spend my hours doing alchemy
i mix my yellows and my blues to make a shade of green
chasing impossible philosophy
and hoping that this poison ain't the death of me

cadmium red is the ground beneath
cadmium orange, everything i see
cadmium yellow is the air i breathe
cadmium colors painted inside me
i can make autumn from a single leaf
steal a fine picture like a first class thief
make the water work like you won't believe
find a new world that can set you free
how could anybody ever live like-

(baby, do you know what you wanna hear?)
('cause you can say the word, make it oh so clear)
we're all just searching for a sense of solidarity
to hold each other close and confiscate our destiny
(no one wants to leave with a work undone)
(we only need a brush we can pass along)
i kept a bullet in the chamber for a rainy day
but what's the point in planning for it anyway?
i've got too many colors for a shade of grey
and i can make it autumn every single day!

Cadmium Colors

featuring visualeyes on keys
the vocal synth Kasane Teto SV,
and apologies to no one but myself

--

watch the blood get spilled
you can kill, or you can be killed
it doesn’t really matter what i feel
i would rather fake than make the pain real

oh, take that smirk, wipe it off your face
you would do the same shit if it let you change your fate
if life is nothing but an endless race
you bet your ass i'm getting first place

please somebody get me out of here
oh please somebody wont you get me out of here, oh!
you can get me out of here!

yep, that's right, let your dreams take flight
watch the line go up, line go up, up up up up up
until it breaks right through, blows a hole through you
you can fill it up, fill it up, f- f- fill it up
and all the meat will slide off the bone, so nice
you can eat it up, eat it up, eat eat eat eat eat
until you're full of life, its a goddamn vibe
baby, fuck it up, fuck it up, fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
oh we can fuck until the sun burns out
we can rot for clout

die upon your hill
i live apart from love and goodwill
and when the pain comes calling for my head
yeah i would rather hurt than be happy and dead

oh, fuck your frown, baby, spare your grace
now i’m wearing my crown, perfect framing of my face
all the detail surgically replaced
it’s a crying shame, a pathetic disgrace

please somebody get me out of here
please somebody wont you get me out of here, oh!
i’m not getting out of here!

hah, that's right, let your dreams take flight
watch the line go up, line go up, up up up up up
until it breaks right through, blows a hole through you
you can fill it up, fill it up, f- f- fill it up
and all the meat deep-fried with a garnish and side
you can eat it up, eat it up, eat eat eat eat eat
until you're full of life, on the edge of the knife
baby, cut it up, cut it up, fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck it
oh god, a waking nightmare
i live a life so hollow that i’m not even there
oh god, the light won’t save me
oh i’m a perfect tempered instrument and life is gonna play me
come and fuck me till the sun burns out
and I rot for-

maybe not a single real reason
my blood’s already out of season
so unwanted, even by myself
tell me, what the hell? what the hell?

i don’t like what’s at my core
pray to god to fix my soul
but i don't need god’s forgiveness
i need yours

hah, thats right, let your dreams take flight
watch the line go up, line go up, up up up up up
until it breaks right through, blows a hole through you
you can fill it up, fill it up, f- f- fill it up
and all the meat will grind into pretty pink slime
you can eat it up, eat it up, eat eat eat eat eat
until you're full of life, cut yourself up with the knife
baby, cut it up, cut it up, fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck it
oh god, a waking nightmare
i live a life so miserable, it isn’t fair
oh god, the light won’t save me
so let the anthropocene watch me GOING FUCKING CRAZY
come and fuck me till the sun burns out
and I rot for clout
[i'm crazaeiaieae]

Ugh (Felx Lamp Remix Flashu Version)

flashu_ng