lyrics :

They’re going down to nutmeg grove, where they’ve legalized the pain.
Get used to the taste of hammer shots and nails plugged in the brain.
Sweet Lucy so excited, dreaming of freedom for so long,
Started to put her electric barb wire dress on.

Those days down in nutmeg grove, there was a big blue sky.
Nothing really else to do than, lie around and smile.
Sweet Lucy in the sky with demons, dancing in the sun.
Turning round and round, in her eletric barb wire dress on.

But that day down at nutmeg, grove the water started to fall.
Nothing really left to do than hide away or crawl.
The rain just kept on falling, and clouds were there for long.
Lucy kept on dancing but the demons stole the fun.

Panic down in nutmeg grove, opening old sores.
Nothing for a man to do, but feel the pain, growing more and more.
The hammer shots became stronger, the nails plugged deeper inside.
Nothing for the rest to do, but run away or die.

Since then down in nutmeg groove, the ground is burned and dry.
Everybody’s gone away, some of them even died.
The sun won’t ever shine again, what goes up has to come down,
Lucy kept on dancing but she’s nowehere to be found.

Dreams come every night but what’s goes up has to come down,
Lucy kept on dancing but she’s nowehere to be found.
The barbwire’s grown charper, rusting in the sun,
Lucy died alone, with her electric barb wire dress on.

Lucy kept on dancing but she’s nowehere to be found.
The barbwire’s grown charper, rusting in the sun,
Lucy died alone, with her electric barb wire dress on.

La punition _ Lucy in the sky with demons

Archon

Whipped up another dance track.
I needed a break from the emotional devastation that comes with writing the usual CG tracks. Mental health is in the trash.

Defeat

My mind is ablaze with madness. I have had a rather difficult few weeks, I really struggled to compose this track, and in the end this was all improvised, then collected & re-interpreted & turned into what ever this song is.. More than anything this was just collecting a bunch of miserable frequencies rather than any type of song. That's how it feels. I wrote 5 or 6 sets of lyrics and they are just insane rambling. I was reading suicide letters and tried to include something from them to help honor and validate these poor lost individuals who chose to give up. None are  directly quoted but absorbed and folded in.

I used a microphone in the studio to feedback into the recording to emulate the sound of the screaming metal of a passing train as it narrowly misses you. I miss walking along the train lines at night.
I used this, along with drowning  everything(almost) in chorus  & reverb straight from my mixer to tape, also purposefully including clipping and blown out audio to curate the awful hopeless, last ditch, atmosphere.

I want to give up on music, I have before. I don't think trying to absorb my misery and then turn it into something else is useful.
but I don't know what else to do.

And its called Necrophilia because I'm the dead one fucking itself.
I ruined many good opportunities. I'm addicted to misery.
Maybe I should have called it Auto-Necrophilia?

Hardware: X32, Guitar, bass, JP-08, DX7, TR-08,  Feedback noise mic. 
Send help
+++++++++

There is nothing left that i ever want to see
my dreams are dead
there is nothing to achieve
god is dead
there is nothing to believe
No help is coming
no one will ever miss me.

I just want to be 
someone else
please god
save me from myself

give me a drug                
that feels as good 
as blood
its the perfect drug
there is no drug 
as good as blood
if there ever was a god
i need you to know
that i need you now
save me from myself

there is nothing left
that i ever wish to see
my dreams are dead
there is nothing to achieve
god is dead
there is nothing to believe
No help is coming
no one will ever miss me.

Necrophilia

I've been sitting on this one since August 2020 and I finally decided to finish it once and for all. The real good stuff is coming by the end of the year.
Cover art by Plague '94.

SPECIMEN 08-20

Some electronic music.

Artwork for the upcoming album is nearly complete.

Hardware used, MKS-50, DX7, JP-8000,

I am completely devoid of any feelings. Cant write anything with any meaning,

Club Meat

its time to give up on my dreams 
its time to pretend that i am someone else
I know I'm nothing special
I know I have got nothing much to give
but it still stings
when its sinking in
it still stings
when its sinking in

failure is all i've ever known
being out of place is where i fit
and it still stings
every day i live

im sick of being sick
Im sick of sadness personified
im sick of living 
im sick of living with myself
and it still stings
when it all sinking in
and it still stings
every day i live

its time to give up on my myself
its time to give up like i never have before
it still stings

Failure

Track #6 to "The Visage of Hatred" (2022). 
Prod. by Plague '94
Mixed and mastered by @chlorinegargoyle

NOTHING CAN STOP ME THIS TIME
STEPPING ON THE GAS IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT
EYES SHUT, TAKE MY HANDS OFF THE WHEEL
FEELING MORE ALIVE THAN THE PAST FIVE YEARS

LET IT ALL CRASH
LET IT ALL CRASH DOWN

GAZING AT THE STARS IN SILENCE
AS I BLEED OUT ON THE PAVEMENT
I DIE AS I LIVED
ALONE WITH MY SHATTERED DREAMS

LET IT ALL CRASH
LET IT ALL CRASH DOWN

End Of The Road

Track #2 to "The Visage of Hatred" (2022). 
Prod. by Plague '94
Mixed and mastered by @chlorinegargoyle

FIGHT OR FLIGHT
YOU'RE ALWAYS FIGHTING
A MILLION THOUGHTS
FLOODING YOUR HEAD
YOU GET
NOSEBLEEDS FROM THE STRESS
CHEST TIGHT LIKE A NOOSE
SURVIVAL INSTINCT ABUSE

PRESSURE
CORNERED
CAN'T KEEP
COMPOSURE

HEAD. READY. TO BLOW.

SUFFOCATION BY THE HANDS OF THE MIND
AGITATION, RUNNING OUT OF TIME

...

Death Anxiety

ACROHACT-Ayahuasca

Rhythmic Noise, Power Noise, Industrial, Dark Ambient, Hardcore, 
Live Electronic, Breakcore, Glitch, IDM

ACROHACT-Ayahuasca

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