recorded, written & engineered by ghoulshorizon
produced by biscuitboi (leased)

lyrics:

fuck everything i wrote down
its not like 
ill gather to courage to say it now
rip another bowl
start floating on a cloud
shitty artist
cant find his sound
yeah things have been getting bad
i think im cursed
yeah baby tell me what im worth
tell me how much it hurts
tell me how much im worth to you

aye 
tell me how much I'm worth
show me you need by my yourside
even in bed when you cry
makes me wanna die
stick to your side
I'm not good at goodbyes

fuck everything i wrote down
its not like 
ill gather to courage to say it out loud
rip another bowl
start floating on a cloud
shitty artist
cant find his sound
yeah things have been getting bad
i think im cursed
yeah baby tell me what im worth
tell me how much it hurts
tell me how much im worth to you

ghoulshorizon - courage (biscuitboi)

i guess i was getting used to being someone you loved.

some one you loved

this song means alot to me. I saw nick play this live and sang everyword. If I could find the video i will link it. This song speaks to me on so many levels and honestly gives me hope. if you see this guardin ive been following you for years and your the reason i started making music next to miles. You talked to me in your discord once and I told you I wrote songs and wanted to start music. You told me to go for it and put passion into it. I never forgot that and thank you so much for everything you do with your music <3.

prod. tothegood, written by guardin

lyrics: 
Sorry I'm blue
Just thought that you knew
That I'm fucked up in the head
It's conscious, it's nothing new
Just wanted to talk to you
But that's been impossible
Baby you know you're unstoppable
Breaking me down to the follicle
Fuck what you know, either you love me or leave me alone
Turning your back when I need you the most
I'm in my bed with the sheets on my head like a ghost
Drift to the coast, I don’t need anything here but my coat
Boarding my bus and I'm seated in coach
Hopping right off and I'm sparking my roach (Sparking my roach)
I'm just so high and I thought you should know
Level is nothing I know, I'm on a cloud overseas looking down at your boat (Down at your boat)
Fuck what I'm feeling, removing that lump from my throat
I'm speaking up cause I'm dying alone
Where the fuck are you? I'm calling your phone

[Bridge]
Where the fuck are you? I'm calling your phone
Where the fuck are you? I'm calling your phone
Why are they calling you're bad to the bone
Running my mouth on the shit I don't know
I'm just afraid of the monsters I grow
[Chorus]
Falling asleep without saying goodnight
Missing the touch of your lips when I cry
Sleeping alone's never easy at night
Feel like a cunt when I tell you I'm fine
Problems align in the back of my head
Fuck it all up, again and again
Exhale the words that I shouldn't have said
Cover my bed and just swallow me dead

blue (guardin cover)

been working on this song for awhile <3

recorded & engineer by @ghoulshorizon
written by @ghoulshorizon & other falling fast members
prod by: @sleepsx.

lyrics:

it was never the same (same)
fuck u for trying to make me change
ur fucking insane 
who thought a name couild bring back so much pain
im on my knees
dont make me say pretty please
it was never the same
(ye your heartless)
it was never the same (never the same)
its time to go our seperate ways(seperate ways)


hey darling, 
its been 3 months and im trying to change
everything i do just ends up me breaking down and crying
lastnight i wrote a note
but i burned it so no one would find out
im falling back into the old ways
thinking about the old days (the old days)


they found you with needles in your arm
left marks deeper then before (than before)
how could you do this to me
it was us forever
ITS NOT YOUR TIME
ITS NOT YOUR TIME
ITS NOT YOUR TIME
YOU WERE SO FUCKING SELFISH (SO SELFISH 
I FEEL SO HELPLESS
I TRIED TO MAKE AMENDS
BUT ALL GOOD THINGS ARE MEANT TO END (MEANT TO END)
ITS NOT YOUR TIME
ITS NOT YOUR TIME
ITS NOT YOUR TIME
i told everyone i was gonna change
but day after day
nothings changed
im still the same
IM STIL THE SAME
SAVE ME FROM MYSELF

it was never the same (same)
fuck u for trying to make me change
ur fucking insane 
who thought a name couild bring back so much pain
im on my knees
dont make me say pretty please
im so depressed i think im healing
i can still smell your cig smoke in the ceiling
i got a feeling
im holding onto nothing
so please just give me something
something to have
something to hold
to fill the void in my soul
its getting cold
ITS WAS NEVER THE SAME (SAME, same, same)

ghoulshorizon - crystals (sleepsx)

heavily influenced by 9tails & sewerperson on this song. <3
this song is rly personal and im going through alot in my life rn. 


and im sick of fucking filtering
i barely breath air
when its lights out
but i know that the fear is still there

what am I waiting for
i can't open up the door
i gotta fiddle with the lock first
this shitty life is more like a curse
if i throw my heart out will you find it
all these shitty days will arise
its true i said i love you first now look at us now

why should i wait for someone who never cared
for the last time
i remember we talked about it 
but you have no place for me
and you have him
so whats the point of having this conversation

if i hold you hand will you let go of it 
im drinking again, just to get the thought out of my mind
im glad u found love, but i dont have it
reassure me to ease my mind
tell me its all gonna be fine
fell in the swamp
now im drowning
rainydays
now im frowning
open another bottle of liquor 
im downing

why should i wait for someone who never cared
for the last time
i remember we talked about it
but you have no place for me
and you have him
so whats the point of having this conversation

climbing out the river bank
water up to my waist
blood on my clothes & face
barely breathing everythings going blurry
i need to hurry
no ones here to save me
its over
ITS OVER
BREAKING DOWN AGAIN
USE ME TO GET OVER HIM
U DO THIS OVER AGAIN
HOW CAN U DO THIS TO ME
IM HUMAN
im human, im human

why should i wait for someone who never cared
for the last time
i remember we talked about it 
but you have no place for me
and you have him
so whats the point of having this conversation  

I HAVE BLED ENOUGH
FOR THIS STUPID LOVE
RIP MY HEART OUT
SEW UP THE CUT
I HAVE HAD ENOUGH
I DONT GIVE A FUCK
ive had enough
im stuck back in place
days go to waste
sipping liquor without a chase
just so i can take it all to the face
im drowning my sorrows
i wont change
im the same

why should i wait for someone who never cared
for the last time
i remember we talked about it 
but you have no place for me
and you have him
so whats the point of having this conversation

ghoulshorizon - swamp // riverbank (nevrfall x branwen)

is a little agony worth it??

prod me 

its struggle to breathe when ur drowning?

ghoulshorizon - panic attack *interlude*

prod @jolst
this song is one of my favorite songs  shoutout @bizzies thats my brother and shoutout svnam now (@sideviewdriveca) & @sendflowrs for the amazing orignal song <3.

also all the background screams r me in the song LOL.

lyrics;

[Intro]
Hey, darling
Are you doing okay
We haven't talked in a while
& I miss that smile
Are you screening all my calls again?
& I swear that I'm sorry
Hey, darling

[Chorus]
Hey, darling
Are you doing okay?
We haven't talked in a while
& I miss that smile
Are you screening all my calls again?
& I swear that I'm sorry
Hey, darling

[Verse]
*Hey, darling*
It's the little things that keep me up at night like..
Like the way you looked at me under the moonlight
I miss the gloss in your eyes when you'd try not to cry
'Cause we knew that we could never hold on forever
& I'd call back if I could find the time to kill
Like we did on your front porch every night last summer
Try as I might, but I think I'll never forget you
[Chorus]
Hey, darling
Are you doing okay?
We haven't talked in a while
& I miss that smile
Are you screening all my calls again?
& I swear that I'm sorry
Hey, darling

Hey, darling
Are you doing okay?
We haven't talked in a while
& I miss that smile
Are you screening all my calls again?
& I swear that I'm sorry
Hey, darling

[Verse: sendflowrs & Svnam]
Hey, darling
I know it's out of the blue
But I'm laying in bed & I'm thinking of you
& every night that we spent staring up at the moon
& I still love you to death
Almost a year without you

Hey, darling
I know you think I'm hopeless
But if you asked I'd make a bed full of roses
*Are you screening all my calls again?*
How did we drift like this
You were the closest thing I had
Watch as my body decomposes

hey darling (cover w/bizzies -  jolst)

i know how you feel, dont feel alone, just know theres hope

prod. LethalNeedle

written, recorded and engineered by @ghoulshorizon, DECEA$EDBOY & ducksy

lyrics:

waking up i hear the sirens
so i sit here in my room in silence
while you attack her with your violence
its not really cool
your really not defiant
yeah my music is gonna take me out of here
and ima have kanye as my stylist

everything burns to ashes
this is my surival tactic
if i bring the gas
you gotta match it
i found a exploit
maybe you should patch it

yea yea
the blue dragon shooting fire from its lungs
the water stays stagnent
while we discover the fragments
swinging our blades
barely attacking

yeah fuck this shit
im making music for the people that dont wanna live
that cant get a grip
i know how you feel
dont feel alone
just know theres hope
smoking until i choke
trying to cope with this fucked up world
so just sing along to this song
its really hard to move on
and i  know my friends got my back
but am i really sure about that
everything burns to ashes
this is my surival tactic
if i bring the gas
you gotta match it
i found a exploit
maybe you should patch it
shooting at my enemies with fire magic
driving around town in a maybach
aint it tragic
my phone isnt picking up anything but static
looks like im going manic
these are stupid habits that form overtime
i distance myself from everybody
and when i try to get to sleep
my mind kicks into overdrive
then i can sleep at night
this happens everytime    
my boys r doing line to line
packing their bongs
yeah we finished this song
yeah i rolled up this blunt and ima face it right now

everything burns to ashes
this is my surival tactic
if i bring the gas
you gotta match it
i found a exploit
maybe you should patch it 
shooting at my enemies with fire magic
driving around town in a maybach
aint it tragic

ducksy:
patch it 
patch it
baby im patch it
nigga if u fuck with me ill stretch u like elastic
n if u dont believe me ima show that im bat shit
nigga they call me manic nigga they call me spastic
when u pull up i can see a quite panic
what u nervous arent you just here for some service
whats wrong i can see your sweaty palms
you look me in the eyes
you hand onto your side
split second later and you met your demise
your on the floor dead
took some lead to the head (fuck)
you aint gonna get a bodybag 
we just gonna burn it down to ash


DECEA$EDBOY:
Slit my wrists triple six
I’m about to throw a fit 
Y’all niggas talk yo shit 
with the whole clique 
spreading all the spliff 

Fake ass bitch 
Turn you to ashes 
See your life flash before your eyes 
And ima laugh while you fuckin crashin

Came from the flames 
You know my fucking name 
I’ll drive you all insane 
I’m inside your brain 

Evil lurking in the corners of your circle 
Thaw you out 
Put you in the house 
Fuck your screams 
Ima burn you to ashes
Pass you off to the wolves 
Do a dance n

Take you under with me 
Dead inside already 
Fuck it all my homies are batshit spastic 
Turn my back n I don’t regret it 
Fuck you n your bitch got a hold of it


everything burns to ashes
this is my surival tactic
if i bring the gas
you gotta match it
i found a exploit
maybe you should patch it 
shooting at my enemies with fire magic
driving around town in a maybach
aint it tragic

my phone isnt picking up anything but static
running from my demons
asking when will the curse lift
school taught me nothing but how to write in cursive
i dont fw this group
im divergent

ghoulshorizon - ashes w/ ducksy &  DECEA$EDBOY (LethalNeedle)

how tf am I suppose to be a rolemodel?

prod. @scottysplash
lyrics + vox + engeering. @ghoulshorizon

lyrics:

baby i need a bandage
no i cant manage
can't heal from all this damage
i dont think you understand
your not speakin the same language
foreign coat
freezing cold
shawty im just tryna build sum
how could i plan this
a&r's trading prices with me
i dont want to sellout
but I need the money
its rly gonna help me
but i know my soul will be empty
ik my sister & cousins look up to me
its like im a fucking rolemodel


i aint got sleep in days
life through me a hurdle pause i jumped over that shit
twisting up joints all day
looking to my left
looking to my right wondering who will stay
fuck out my face with the fake shit
fuck out my face with that lame shit

I just need to know the formula for getting by
the shit people do to kill the vibe
i watched my bestfriend lose his life (im sorry)
that shit is embed in my mind
how the fuck
how the fuck am I supposed to wake up and say im fine
god
im sorry for killing to vibe

she asked me are you still mine?
baby you drain my life
you take over all my thoughts
i drink this shit
i take this to clean my mind
but this wont last
and my thoughts clash
life hit like a car crash
no one checked in on me when you left
but your shocked when u saw the hole in my chest
just fucking leave
just fucking leave like the rest
just fucking leave like my ex
how tf am i supposed to be a role model

baby i need a bandage
no i cant manage
can't heal from all this damage
i dont think you understand
your not speakin the same language
foreign coat
freezing cold
shawty im just tryna build sum
how could i plan this
a&r's trading prices with me
i dont want to sellout
but I need the money
its rly gonna help me
but i know my soul will be empty
ik my sister & cousins look up to me
its like im a fucking rolemodel

ghoulshorizon - rolemodel (scottysplash)

prod brawen
ft @sendflowrs
engineer by me n flowrs

lyrics:

[Verse 1: ghoulshorizon]
Stop, I was always in the wrong wrong
Fuck, please don't be gone
It would be nice if I could make the words to talk
It would be nice if we just stayed friends
It would be nice if we just stayed friends
It would be nice if we just stayed friends
I hope you know

[Bridge: ghoulshorizon]
And I built up these walls
To watch them fall
And I built up these walls
To watch them fall

[Verse 2: sendflowrs]
Run it back
Yeah, baby, when you see me
I been playing Xbox staring at the TV
I know you been drinking, let's go hit the city
But I been too paranoid and it's such a pity
Yeah, you got an attitude, I'm killing all my kidneys
And if you disregard me, yeah, I'll tell you how I'm feeling
Yeah, it wasn't gratitude, I'm only living
That shit made me snap again
I'ma keep on killing
And I'm a rogue
[?]
I'll catch right up and kill you both
If you don't tell him now
I can't ever stay [?]
[?]
If I can't have you, no one can
[?]

[Verse 3: ghoulshorizon]
I hope you know
Baby I hope u understand
You're my Novocain, my medicine
Don't need the antidepressants
Rolling these woods like they're effective
Why don't I put this to a end
It's not okay and I'm not okay
This song will never get uploaded and it'll be another fucking throwaway
I won't pretend, I hope you understand
You're my medicine
And we lied to all of our friends
Yeah, we should have just stayed friends
I won't pretend, I hope you understand
You're my medicine
And we lied to all of our friends
Yeah, we should have stayed friends

ghoulshorizon - stayed friends w/ sendflowrs (branwen)

produced by mars

lyrics:

look in the mirror, i cant reconize my self
im getting slumped everyday, any1 wanna help
i got all these fucked up thoughts, but i got no one to tell
we all bleed red, but for my sins im going to hell
these long nights definietly dont help.

i remember when u used to need me
now you dont
i remember those shitty days back in vt
now im alone
can u stay clean for atleast a week
i know you wont
i still hear ur voice and see your face in my dreams
some1 tighten the rope

im a fuck up
always getting drunk
ill never be enough
thats why we always fall in n out of love
n u picked the drugs over me
how can i give u any sympathy
when u left me
all the things idk 
all the feelings i dont show 
everytime i write a song i know you listen


look in the mirror, i cant reconize my self
im getting slumped everyday, any1 wanna help
i got all these fucked up thoughts, but i got no one to tell
we all bleed red, but for my sins im going to hell
these long nights definietly dont help.

(pitched down)

look in the mirror, i cant reconize my self
im getting slumped everyday, any1 wanna help
i got all these fucked up thoughts, but i got no one to tell
we all bleed red, but for my sins im going to hell
these long nights definietly dont help.

ghoulshorizon - hell

original song Sadie Jean - WYD Now? (feat. Zai1k & Zakhar)

completely non profit

produced by LGC

ion rly expect this song todo well I made it for fun and its mostly a freestyle

lyrics:

(sadie jean)
I don't wanna be twenty something
And still in my head about
Seventeen in my bedroom talking
You said that by now we'd
Paint the walls of our shared apartment
You're still everything I want and
I think we could work it out
So what are you doin' now?

(ghoulshorizon)
what you doing now?
me, im busy partying down town
but ur still someone i think about
id do anything to change things around
by why do i gotta be 20 something living out my dreams in a small town

yeah im somebody u forgot about now x3

yeah it happened way to quick
covid hit and everybody got sick
i forgot about u, i didnt check my messages
now i ask my self
wyd now
is there someone ur thining about

do i have a chance now x3

baby whats wrong
u remember me
i remember this is ur favorite song
i dont wanna traumatize u 
but u most of forget
its only been 2 years n i guess that loves gone
baby prove me wrong

im so tired
u told me there was a fire
but the love is gone
and the fire got put out
so ill just sit here
drink a case of beers and pass out
i know ur laying on his chest
listening to his heart beat
i must of got lucky 
because i was told everybody has somebody
but i have nobody
im speaking these words so calmy
prove me wrong baby

(sadie jean & ghoulshorizon)
I don't wanna be twenty something
And still in my head about
Seventeen in my bedroom talking
You said that by now we'd
Paint the walls of our shared apartment
You're still everything I want and
I think we could work it out
So what are you doin' now?

ghoulshorizon x sadie jean - wyd now?  (LGC) [remix]

slept all day yesterday didnt put out, merry christmas yall tysm for listening to my music got some new things coming in the new year.

produced by. pieper beats

tried something new for this song.

lyrics:

i always try my best
dont know how much time i have left
sleeping all day
wondering what is next
where were you when i was in the projects
i dont got time im smoking good weed
not answering your texts on my flip phone
no momma im not coming home

live life like ur tough as nails
im getting sick of everything
everything i do just fails
purple rolled up
i got syrup in my double cup
shit hit my lungs yeah that shit was rough
sipping lean like im tough
but i just wanna feel sum
its raining 
its pouring
my friends are succeeding
some of them are out touring
while im in the 03 whip (shits almost as old as me)
foot on the gas flooring it
rolling all this green
flipping off everybody
shut the fuck up, im living my dreams
everyday is a good day when ur high
but at night it gets hard
i get high but still lay there n cry

i always try my best
dont know how much time i have left
sleeping all day
wondering what is next
where were you when i was in the projects
i dont got time im smoking good weed
not answering your texts on my flip phone
no grandma im not coming home

spend weeks making a new mix 
im still unhinged
learning how to sing so i can do the vox right
got the same same old lyrics
this shits gonna be a hit if i can just pickup the mic

playing the guitar like im dominic fike
yk this got u feeling right
friends say im waisting my time
im on my grind

i always try my best
dont know how much time i have left
sleeping all day
wondering what is next
where were you when i was in the project
i dont got time im smoking good weed
not answering your texts on my flip phone
i always try my best 
dont know how much time i have left (left, left)
is this the end (end, end)

ghoulshorizon - try my best (pieper)

produced by ryini
orginally peformed by sewerperson <3

mixed by me 

lyrics:

[Intro]
He's from the house with no one home (Oh)
Might hear them calling, don't pick up the phone (Oh)
She's from a place where heaven is made (Oh)
She's got him locked into her masquerade

[Verse 1]
She said "I have fixed it, right"
He's never falling, but he's scared of the sign
My eyes bleed through the shade
I haven't broken, before she and me
When time comes to break what we made (Break what we made)
Both of our futures will fall into place (Fall, fall into)
Four years apart, baby, how long can we wait? (How long can we wait?)
My heart is open if you want this space

[Bridge]
Oh, oh
Oh
Oh, oh
Oh
Oh, oh, oh
Oh, oh

[Verse 2]
When you try to find me, I'll be beyond a grave
I'll have blue on my face, twenty years put to waste
Light that I see was blinding, now I'm in empty space
From the choices I make, I'm glad I didn't wait
I'm always finding new mistakes that we've made
All these sins fade away 'fore my person today
Ask me where I've been hiding, I've been all on my own
I'm the boy from the house where no one is home

sewerperson - no one is home (cover/ryini)

had to say whats been on my mind lately, 

prod sorrow bringer and boyfifty

passion freestyle (sorrow bringer x boyfifty)

i recorded this with covid LOL my throat hurts but worth.

prod boyfifty
mix and master by me

lyrics:

wait wait wait

im the fat emo kid
that never gave a fuck
but i still got the baddest bitch (u cant relate)
and thats enough

swear ion wanna deal with my feelings
like mf i dont wanna be here
ill say fuck u to all my friends (who)
on god
i wonder why everything is so tense
i just need to relax (relax, relax)
mf stop focusing on the past
ion wanna be here
the rooms to crowded (fuck this)
like ion wanna think about it
so ill drink about it
my visions got clouded 
ima party all night and play madden (madden)
ion follow no dreams no more
its all in my imagination

im barely living
these scars are healing (lets go!)
im finally getting better
than what is this feeling
finally getting a traction (yea)
im scared im not enough
is there some atraction to my music (is there )
i battle everyday with this sh it
if ima quit ima just smoke weed all day
i know im so basic, but eventually ill finally fade (no it wont)

the rooms so dark, until i spark
i hear voices its the demon that wants to rip me apart (mf leave me alone)
yeah im heating up a dab (cough)
just so i can take a nap 
catching these hands
i like when i let the bands stack
and thats a fact (thats a fucking fact)
i used to love when u said my name
now its not the same (u changed)
i got one foot in the grave (grave)
i got these demons 
but ill let them shade 
i got these reasons
i know my fate (fate, fate)
but why can i keep making mistakes
i got these people i call friends
that i feel betrayed
its just not the same everyone changed. 

im barely living
these scars are healing (lets go!)
im finally getting better
than what is this feeling
finally getting a traction (yea)
im scared im not enough
is there some atraction to my music (is there )
i battle everyday with this sh it
if ima quit ima just smoke weed all day
i know im so basic, but eventually ill finally fade (no it wont)

not enough (boyfifty)

prod. rrarebear

mix and mastered by me

lyrics:

babe i swear im tryna get my shit together
its almost the end of november
ill never mention how things get to my head
ill never tell you everything i did before u left

my days are getting shorter
i know its because im growing older
its winter and i know its getting colder
1100 miles away can we get closer
i wish i could be there today
i wish i could hold her
i wish i could be there tonight
i wish i could hold her tonight
because i want you to love me and i wanna be able to tell you everything will be alright
and in my dreams its always u and me

take my hand so you arent alone anymore
i wanna love you until my lifes over
my hearts yours just like when i wrote clover
i could stare at you for hours
peace of mind,
hoping your fine,
freaking out wondering if we are fine

i dont wanna be alone
ur the one who saved me
some could say you changed me
jus like everyone said your bad for me
but they all hate me
u stood by my side through it all
hearing ur voice its so lovely
baby im glad u keep me company
and i know youll be on the red carpet when im somebody
but u where here when i was nobody
i used to think no one could ever love me
than u came out of nowhere
and i might of fell to hard
but so far its not bad
you got a piece of my heart 


take my hand so you arent alone anymore
i wanna love you until my lifes over
my hearts yours just like when i wrote clover
i could stare at you for hours
peace of mind,
hoping your fine,
freaking out wondering if we are fine

my days are getting shorter
i know its because im growing older
its winter and i know its getting colder
1100 miles away can we get closer
i wish i could be there today
i wish i could hold her
i wish i could be there tonight
i wish i could hold her tonight
because i want you to love me and i wanna be able to tell you everything will be alright
and in my dreams its always u and me

you and me (prod. rrarebear)

prod. autrioly
mix and master by me

lyrics:

i been working my ass off 
hopefully recording every single day, one day itll pay off
than i wont have to worry, ima take myself to the top
i tried to roll a blunt, its got a hole its okay ill fix it
than ill spark it, hold the smoke until i cough
taking these pills, like mf its effecting my vision 
lost so many people to this shit, some say they are just lost
but i wont learn i wont quit, it all ends the same
listen its an addiction, mixed with a little temptation
sometimes i go nucular, dont get stuck in my radiation
who are we, like are we sheep to this human nation
im too fucking real, they wont even have me on there radio station
im a demon, i evovled into the lucifer himself
i think god fucked up the mutation
how many angels do I have to slay before its too late

how many times do i have to leave like this, i swear no one can ever fucking relate
fuck all your weapons
fuck all your money
fuck ur social construct
fuck everything its all meaningless

ran out of drugs its okay, i got the plug starred in my contacts
i used to be smart, now i start to empty my pockets

how long?
how long?
till its all gone?
how long till u all forgot
how long?
how long?
until its all gone
how long till my heart stops
how long
how long

how long (autrioly)

produced by wisssery
mix by me and @AVXiD
master by me

ig im always destined for doom?

doom w/AVXiD (prod. wisssery)

produced by haru
mix and mastered by me
completely non profit
originally performed by @guccihighwaters <3

lyrics:


Why does everything in my head fall apart?
It's beautiful, it's like a work of art
Try resuscitate the passion in my heart
But there's no passion left, I'm in a burning car

Let the flames engulf me, I
Just wanna feel something
Burning down to my bones
I'm charred, I'm coal

I tried, I told you I'd be there for you
You said nobody ever cared for you
I should've picked up my phone
Maybe you would've put down the rope

(I tried, I told you I'd be there for you)
(You said nobody ever cared for you)
(I should've picked up my phone)
(Maybe you would've put down the rope)

Back to the basics, Mom, I know I'll make it
'Cause everyone told me that I'm going places
Can't wait to erase all the past, you know pain doesn't last
So I packed up my bags, seeing much greener grass

And I wish I could've shown you the things I've seen
Since you left (Since you left)
Burning down to my bones (Burning down to my bones)
I'm charred, I'm coal

I tried, I told you I'd be there for you
You said nobody ever cared for you
I should've picked up my phone
Maybe you would've put down the rope

(I tried, I told you I'd be there for you)
(You said nobody ever cared for you)
(I should've picked up my phone)
(Maybe you would've put down the rope)

I hope I wake up in the morning
It's just a nightmare, a bad story
I hope I wake up to some good news
It's been a while since I seen you, and I miss you

I tried, I told you I'd be there for you
You said nobody ever cared for you
I should've picked up my phone
Maybe you would've put down the rope

(Put down the rope, put down the rope)
(Put down the rope, whoa)
(Put down the rope, put down the rope)
(Put down the rope, whoa)

guccihighwaters - rope (cover/haru)

produced by @AVXiD, SHOW DA HOMIE LOVE THIS EP WOULDNT BE POSSIBLE WITHOUT AVXID <3

mix n master by me
sample from the vanity of existence.

original name was perception 2 but i been making a lot of pt.2's lately but it does kinda sound like perception lol


lyrics:

its all about the perception of everyone around me
i want everyone to be proud of me
but in reality it dont mean shit
so sit down itll be quick
same shit different day
woke up today less depressed than yesterday
still all i can fucking do is complain

i said i was taking a break
all it did was start to break me
in reality i just got lazy
ur words cant phase me
day after day hoping i make it
all i can do is day dream
and i know you said you hate me
yeah i been hearing that a lot lately
im waiting for the reaper to take me
im waiting for someone to save me'
ive been on this path for 2 long
this shit did change me
i go back down this road for my own saftey
im gonna have to wanna change
nobody can make me

i spent a whole year trying to get my fucking life back
keep living this life ima end up in a body bag
mars needs to stop stressing 
all u do is have panic attacks
its the perception
at the end of the day
this music is my prize
faking a smile
acting like everything is fine
but its not fucking fine
and if u cant see it than why am do i even try
i bottle these emotions up
i keep them all inside
listening to the vanity of existence
trying to keep it together
hope i dont lose all of my patience
do you really know how long it took me to make this
i hope my music will be timeless

its all about the perception of everyone around me
i want everyone to be proud of me
but in reality it dont mean shit
so sit down itll be quick
same shit different day
woke up today less depressed than yesterday
still all i can fucking do is complain


i wanna stay independant
but everything is getting repetive
i wanan start a collective
but everyone keeps being fake to me
im losing my mind
i cant even scroll twitter without seeing u in my mentions
like why do you want from me
let shit go already
i guess i know who was really my enemy

its all about the perception of everyone around me
i want everyone to be proud of me
but in reality it dont mean shit
so sit down itll be quick
same shit different day
woke up today less depressed than yesterday
still all i can fucking do is complain

yesterday (prod. AVXiD)

produced by @AVXiD
mix and master me

lyrics:
nothing feels real
everything takes time to heal
so baby tell me if u tryna chill
i cant feel my face am i even real
girl u got me thinking a mile a minute
i love you and i dont know if i could ever feel again
trippin over dumb shit i hate it
tryna focus on myself
but i cant keep it all in
if you kill me 
can you please make it quick baby?
because i want you here next to me
but u have what was left of my heart

babe i cant explain myself
i cant use my words it gets hard
too many emotions that i have felt
(its not your fault)
my heart is big but i cant keep giving in
i got like 22 empty bottles up on that shelf
(get it together)
if i keep this up im gonna lose myself
till this day i could of died,
paranoid but i shouldn't text her
u are mine always and forever

i have trauma that eats away at my mind
i fucking say this all the time
fall asleep knowing everything i know is one big fucking lie
girl im right here
please jus give me some fucking time
when i hear ur voice i feel more alive
i hope u know u are mine
i wish i knew if you cared about me like i care about you
im scared that you are gonna leave
i hope i get to see u soon
but im falling apart everyday in this fucking room
im constantly fucking up
if i slip up again i might jus fall to my doom
constantly do dumb shit 
so i can drown in this bottle
i fucking breakdown
i disapoint everyone that i care about

im scared
i dont know why
but im so fucking scared

babe i cant explain myself
i cant use my words it gets hard
too many emotions that i have felt
(its not your fault)
my heart is big but i cant keep giving in
i got like 22 empty bottles up on that shelf
(get it together)
if i keep this up im gonna lose myself
till this day i could of died,
paranoid but i shouldn't text her
u are mine always and forever

forever (prod. AVXiD)

produced by @AVXiD
mix n master me

lyrics:
i felt the walls start to cave in
dakota you needa change
start to look within
pack another bowl jus to smoke my medicine
swear my friends said im pussy whipped
staying out late my feet sinking into the pavement
i always get so fucking angry
always resort to violence like a cavemen
u make me lose my shit

sat in therapy talking about my problems
discusing different shit trying to get a new outcome
isnt that insanity dealing in the past
working on my second album 
like im blessed with how far ive come
fell into the swamp now im jus pondscum
dont wanna sign a deal
i like my freedom

put my home town on the map
nobody actually cares where i came from
small town in the middle of vermont
i havent talked to my friends all month
i quit drinking they all still get drunk
put a 8th in the cone
put hash on the outside
everything i love goes up in smoke
pack another bowl lets toke
dont cough dont choke
let the smoke out so you can float
my eyes went red
walking down the street with my hands in my pocket
mumbling something for this song 
it sounds like nosense
but i swear i got it


long nights smoking on the balcony
hoping to find something deep inside of me
i jus wanna be somebody
i jus want somebody to love me
long nights on the balcony
i jus wanna look inside and find something worth saving
something worth saving
long nights on the balcony
long nights on the balcony
let the smoke into the air
long nights on the balcony

pondscum (prod. AVXiD)

heres a song i never finished see you later cowboys and cowgirls

blame it on me unfinished demo (prod. wisssery)

produced by @illsee 

lyrics:

i havent been able to record in 2 weeks
what am I doing
been locked in my room
my family thinks im a freak why am even here
friends text me but ill jus stay inside
i am wasting fucking time
so whats the point of living
when i dont feel alive
what do i do 
what do i do
what do i do to persue
what do i do to get through to you
like bro its the end of june
getting high all day
layed up in my bed watching suits all day
choking this bitch, god im a little crazy
but she likes it, feel like im in 50 shades of gray
i know im crazy, maybe i can be ur christian gray

wait? wake,
wait? wake,
hold me before its too late
take my hand
put me together
so i can feel real again.

i toss in turn in this bed
i drink this bottle again
to get the thought of u out my head
i know itll help
but i dont wanna take my meds
so ill sit here
an drown in my regret x2


fuck it take those shots
i hope u can handle it
like i can down a whole handle
jus to myself im a animal
everyday i waste not recording
i feel like im wasting my time
this shit makes me feel alive
but i battle the thougths that its a waste of time
everyone told me to quit, 
but i believe im the only one keeping this dream alive
i show love to everyone and i cant even get a repost or like
i know ill keep doing it so im going to bed
good night

wait dont go
lay in my arms
this is your home
like hi wait hello?
i love you

i toss in turn in this bed
i drink this bottle again
to get the thought of u out my head
i know itll help
but i dont wanna take my meds
so ill sit here
an drown in my regret x2
im jus a fucking loser with this target on my chest
im tired im jus gonna go to bed

50 shades of gray (prod. maybe)

produced by pekarot
mix and master by me

lyrics:

i fell apart a few months ago when u left
my only friend is this bottle of jack
wanna smoke weed but shits gonna give me another panic attack
its like im tired of not remembering the night
its always jus black
i jus lay here in the abyss

like is he
like is he
is he better than me

did he 
did he
did he love you more than me?
 
i cant stand seeing u with him
got the blood boiling in my veins
i cant sleep i see u and him in my brain
cant do anything right
think im going insane
everybodys leaving
i fucked up and theres nothing worth saving
so i breakdown into nothing
ill be alone in my room writing 
isolate myself while my walls weaken
havent left my room in a minute
take so much acid its like im always tripping
been drinking so much its what im always sipping
want my music to work but im barely living
so heres another sad song im singing

better than me (prod. pekarot)

guitar by 93feetofsmoke
produced by me
engineered by me
written by me

lyrics:

i know i been dying slowly
ur hands the one i should be holding
yk i been falling fast lately
u always jus wanna change me
the strings u used me as ur puppet
why do u gotta do that baby
u used me like u used him
said u would be different

now im alone laying in this bed
laying in this bed
drinking bottle again and again
im barely holding on
im not gonna make it 
laying in this bed
can i know whats next?

u choose him and ik im hopeless
yk winters the coldest
i havent been sleeping
im writing these sad songs
i feel like a old poet
but i cant show any emotions 
my floor covered in bottles
my ashtray filled with roaches
empty pill bottles
but no one fucking noticed

different

produced by me
engineered by me
written by me

lyrics:

and i hate this weather
its almost the end of september
its almost fall
when i gave u my all
im waiting here to to hear ur voice on call
baby i dont wanna be alone
so please pick up the phone
ur the only one i want right now
ill be laying here in my bed all alone
if u dont wanna hear from me
ill leave you alone
baby i miss u now all my days are grey
nothing is appealing my sense of worth went dull 
like the blade in my heart

god i can see the seasons changing 
is it almost fall
when i end it all
when u dont pick up my call
so ill stall
until i run out of time
maybe i will end it all
everyone will laugh no one cared at all
i gave the world my all
god i can see the leaves changi ng
is it fall already
ur words cut deadly

fall

stay

produced by me
engineered by me
written by me

lyrics:

im too far gone
i swear im too far gone
baby u should jus run
theres nothing here to love
i jus needed to see u
but ur not in the mood
so ill go to bed in this empty room
i swear im always falling to my doom
even on my good days i fill it with gloom

gloom

prod meltone
feature @yungaxstn such an amazing artist

how could we have planned this
im lost without you
i can't fucking manage

its the clash of the planets
our worlds collide
i can feel your touch
and i feel you inside
in side my mind  
 
real talk
i felt alive for the first time
our personalitys don't collide
and your by my side
your mine
i feel like im running out of time


i know im hard to deal with sometimes
but im getting better
and i promise ill never leave
aslong as we stay together
through all the rain and the shitty weather 

can i get some fucking help 
don't leave me
don't leave me out in the rain
im stuck in this hell
with the same shackles and chains

ghoulshorizon - mars w/ yung axstn (meltone)

songs i wrote about a bunch of girls an archive of a man who i once was.

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