[Verse 1]
I woke up this morning and couldn't speak,
My throat felt like it was cut by a thousand razor blades,
I was so excited for D and D this week,
But now I'm just feeling dismayed.

[Pre chorus 1]
My dreams of being the DM,
Were dashed by a viral infection,
I was looking forward to the mayhem,
But right now I'm feeling deep abjection.

[Chorus 1]
Viral laryngitis,
Inflammation of my larynx,
I can't do anything to fight it,
And I'm finding it hard to bear it.

My throat feels so sore,
I've got a fever and cough,
Don't think I can take it any more,
And wish I could turn it off.

[Verse 2]
The doctor said to rest my voice,
But I really want to use it,
But I guess I have no choice,
So I thought I'd make some music,

[Pre chorus 2]
Gotta soothe my throat with lozenges,
Take some ibuprofen to alleviate,
I want to use my voice again,
But for now I have to wait.

[Chorus 1]
Viral laryngitis,
Inflammation of my larynx,
I can't do anything to fight it,
And I'm finding it hard to bear it.

My throat feels so sore,
I've got a fever and cough,
Don't think I can take it any more,
And wish I could turn it off.

Viral laryngitis

[intro]
"Welcome to Ankh Morpork city. It's great to see new faces. Call me Dibbler, CMOT. Come with me to see Ankh Morpork's famous places."

[Verse 1]
"The tour starts at a dolla twenty five, and that's cutting me own throat. But I'm the best tour guide alive, so give me your coins and notes."

[Verse 2]
We're starting at the river Ankh,
With water muddy and dense,
So thick you can walk bank to bank,
But do so at your own expense.

The Watch House is on your right,
This is where officers solve crimes,
They keep Ankh Morpork safe at night,
Under the command of Sam Vimes.

[Bridge 1]
This is the Unseen University, 

Where students and wizards reside. 

The Unreal Estate is full of mysteries.

But unfortunately they don't let tourists inside. 

[Bridge 2]
On your left is the Assassin's Guild.

Where younglings are trained to inhume. 

I knew that this place would thrill.

But the tour must now resume.

[Chorus 1]
Dibbler's Ankh Morpork tour,
The best sightseeing trek on The Disc,
It costs a dollar fifty to see more,
But it's worth the financial risk.

Ruled by Havelock Vetenari,
Ankh Morpork is a delight,
The Discworld's finest city,
So let's continue seeing Her sights.

[Verse 3]
On your right is the Temple of Small Gods, where people worship gods of lesser import. The temple is a little bit odd, and you might need an armed escort. 

Next is the Guild of Alchemists, where they practice their explosive art. Unfortunately, this place is definitely off limits for tourists because it often gets blown apart.

[Pre chorus 2]
This part of the city is called The Shades.
You should stay away from this zone.
You'll be stabbed with a wicked blade.
If you walk its streets alone.

[Chorus 2]
Our last stop is the Mended Drum,
The perfect place to drink tonight,
The public are always welcome,
But watch out for the bar fights.

[Outro 1]
Now you've seen a bit of the city,
But Ankh Morpork has hidden gems,
There's so much more of her to see,
So share my tour details with your friends.

[Outro 2]
Thanks for joining Dibbler's Ankh Morpork tour,
I hope you folks had a lot of fun,
The exit is through the souvenir store,
And don't forget to buy a sausage in a bun.


Dibbler's Ankh Morpork Tour

This was requested by my best friend. I hope she likes it! Shrek is a movie directed by Andrew Adamson and Vicky Jenson. It is based on the book "Shrek" written by William Steig.

[Intro 1]
In a swamp lived Shrek the ogre,
Where he was blissfully alone.
But one day his peace was over,
When fairy tale creatures came to his home.

[Intro 2]
Displaced by the Lord Farquaad of Duloc,
The creatures needed a place to stay.
But when they arrived, Shrek was shocked,
And he told them to go away.

[Verse 1]
"GET OUT OF MY SWAMP!" roared Shrek, but the creatures, would not clear out, so this oh gher took a long trek, to find out what it was all about.

He went on a journey with Donkey as a companion, when they arrived he joined a tourney, and rose as its champIon.

[Pre chorus 1]
Farquaad said he'd clear the swamp's occupants,
If Shrek rescued Fiona the princess.
Shreck agreed with some reluctance,
But then he set out on an epic quest.

[Pre chorus 2]
When Shreck and Donkey reached the castle, a dragon attacked on sight.
And though it was a bit of a hassle, Shrek and Donkey won the fight.

[Chorus 1]
Shrek wanted a quiet home,
He needed a peaceful life.
His heart's desire was to be alone,
But the fairy tale creatures gave him strife.

He was determined to find fiona,
And bring her back to Lord Farquaad,
And though he had a grumpy persona,
Shrek did his best to complete the job.

[Verse 2]
They found Fiona in the tower but she was a little bit odd, so Shrek with demeanor sour took her to Lord Farquaad.

But Fiona was cursed when young, a secret she could not tell; she hoped that Farquaad would be the one, to break the awful spell.

[Bridge 1]
But when they returned to Farquaad, Fiona felt a little averse.

She also felt a bit awkward but badly wanted to break the curse.

[Bridge 2]
Then after the wedding's start, Shrek could no longer resist.

He confessed the feelings in his heart and gave fiona a true love's kiss.

[Outro 1]
Fiona changed into an ogre like Shrek as the dragon ate Farquaad in one bite.

Then Shrek married the ogre princess, and the big mess turned into their delight.

[Outro 2]
The creatures then left the swamp.
Shrek and Fiona were finally free.
They lived there in peace without pomp.
And ever after happily.

Shrek (spoilers) (epic bard song)

Power Bestowed (epic instrumental)

Ode to Metal (epic instrumental)

Cleopatra's Curse (epic instrumental)

Stormblessed (epic instrumental)

War of The Gods (epic instrumental)

Neon Nights (epic instrumental)

Shahrazad's Tale (chiptune cover) (epic instrumental)

Vizier (epic instrumental)

Aussie scientist/classical musician who makes weird metal for fun. Expect mostly lighthearted songs and epic instrumentals. Thanks for listening 🤘❤️

Viral laryngitis

Gia

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