RE RE RE REMIX! I'm much happier with this project now! It's two of the most iconic orange cats with a love for layered foods duking it out in this episode of Quizzical Quarrels!

SIR Rap Battles as Stampy
UBERocity as Garfield

Written by Quizzique

Mixed and Arranged by Serena
Beat by Anywaywell

Art by Grasman
Thumbnail by Quizzique

Special Thanks to Fightmarker, RaccoonBroVA, GnomeYT and YLFEthan

LYRICS:

Stampy (0:09)
Hello, this is Stampy, and welcome to a let’s play vid
Today we’re against the scrap pages of Jim Davis
Your schtick is being lazy? That’s mundane
Not feeling up to battling? Must be a case of Mondays!

Your owner’s Jon, but your plot points Aren’t-Buckled
Seems your continuity has Garfield Kart-trouble
Since 2012, I’ve been on that Minecraft star hustle
Born in ‘76, and yet you’ve fallen to a Paws struggle

From Murray to Pratt, you’ve an array of casts
But with your production rights, away they’ve been passed
Sony, Fox, Paramount, and plastered on newspapers
This sellout amounts to having mastered reduced labor

And you’re the comic Guinness backs? I must really need a break
Eat you in minutes on this track as if you were a piece of cake
There are limits that I lack, fighting googlies I attack
Sic my dogs onto your back, since I know they make you quake

Garfield (0:47)

Yawn About time you wrapped up your verse
Ehh, I’ve heard worse, but now allow me to converse
Try to keep viewers immersed, but all your content is rehearsed
You wanna leave a mark on YouTube? Try to Hit the Target first

You sure run a Lovely World with all the helpers you’ve locked out
Man, you’re filled with even more crap than your dog house
Speaking of dogs, you’ve got too many to handle
Left some more dead than a Minecrafter’s channel

You used to be a hit, anyone can attest
Then you took a harder hit than you did with Wonder Quest
Think you’ve got fans on your pages? Be realistic, kid
The ink is going hard on mine like a ballistic squid

Now I’ll be taking names like we’re in the Love Garden
Lost memories are the only thing that heart’s guardin’
I’ve got one last thing that I need to tell you, dude
I bet Lee only left so he could hand the L to you

Stampy (1:24)
Don’t you dare threaten my canines, or else when the dust settles
You’ll be in the ground like you were some love love petals!
So you'd better quit the meddlin' with this MC veteran
I’ll cut your story short, like your show moved to Nickelodeon

If we’re talking dogs, you sure treat Odie like a rough one
No denying that this bully left him half his legs to walk on
If you keep sleeping in, you’ll be a zombie in this ordeal
Not even bone meal can bring your rep back from Gorefield

Entertaining kids for years, still at the peak of my genre
Your three-panel plots are cheesier than your lasagna
You’re impressing no one from that bed in which you’re comfortably curled
So make like Veeva: Dash the hell out of my Lovely World

Garfield (1:53)
Jeez, that writing was even worse than your book’s, chum
You’re looking Fidgety ‘cause that’s where you took your looks from
Your comedy’s more childish than all of Minecraft’s players
I like my comics like I like my lasagna: with layers!

Looking timid on the stage, why the Stampylongface?
You look like you in Story Mode: wrong time, wrong place
Started in FPS, but like your noms it’s only blanks you shoot
Look at the margins, and I’d bargain that you’re yesterday’s news

Write a better script for viewers if you’re hoping they’ll subscribe
I’m spitting fire on my papers like I’m smoking from a pipe
Not even Pooky likes this showman that was once an inspiration
But I guess the limit really was your imagination (Zzz)

Garfield vs Stampy Cat | QUIZZICAL QUARRELS [REDUX] (feat. SIR Rap Battles and UBERocity)

hazelmoth