thoughtform collective.  (Original Lineup)

kewl tunes & kewl peoples ;)))

Joe and friends

ruthie

Nostalgia (noun) - a sentimental longing or wistful affection for the past, typically for a period or place with happy personal associations.

Nostalgia is something that has always troubled me, as I found that it's difficult to properly put my emotions towards it into words. It's not necessarily, or at least in my opinion, a happy or sad emotion, it's just something that we feel. Remembering a possibly warped perception of the past to focus on because the present seems so grim. Looking back upon my childhood and early teenage years does invoke a sense of melancholy and nostalgia, and I tend to think that things were much more simple back then. Maybe it's because the problems of that time are over now that I am able to look at them so clearly, as the problems of the present are shrouded in fear and uncertainty.

I remember stomping through the woods with my friends, then going home to play my gamecube or gameboy, not really caring or thinking about the world around me. Maybe I get stressed out when thinking about nostalgia because I can't properly explain how it makes me feel, whether it's positive or negative, I'm not sure.

It's like a purple mist that surrounds distant memories, just slightly altering my perception of that time. It's interesting.

Thanks for listening <3

Retro Fantasia [prod. xmichaelwarren]

Check Out HeyLee Manzeron:
Soundcloud: @heylee-manzeron
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/0U57BGCHuZ2SMW5iK2t0dM?si=hbc97B2PSRqoYuZVM4RrYg
Beatstars: https://www.beatstars.com/heyleemanzeron
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCKhCeJiIRvbTMtQMlnzCwkQ
Insta: https://www.instagram.com/heyleemanzeron/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/HeyLeeManzeron
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@heyleemanzeron

Artwork by Fall:
Insta: https://www.instagram.com/_fxllen.stxrs_/

Cover Art Designed by:
Soundcloud: @devilboyxo
Spotify: open.spotify.com/artist/0u9B7tJYm…EN0zb5pfK3g&nd=1
Youtube: www.youtube.com/channel/UC1r8soprLjOPmurl2D_NdFw
Twitter: twitter.com/devilboyxo
Instagram: www.instagram.com/devilboyxo/

Check Out the Producer:
Beatstars: https://wxrst.beatstars.com/
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@wxrst1
Insta: https://www.instagram.com/wxrst.beats/

Lyrics:
------------------------------------
(Robstar)
I fell asleep with the lights on
I can't breathe when I'm this deep in the fog
Choking in my sleep with my ice on
She want me to leave but I was already gone
She told me be a little bit clearer
So I took a pill and I wrote this song
The feeling of apathy is nearer
But I couldn't care not to care at all

I cultivate my sins
I make them what you wish
I carve my body to pieces
Endless as bread and fish
Feed me to your hungry
Rip apart my flesh
Use my bones for your undead throne
While parading in my skin

(HeyLee Manzeron)
You told me not to worry about you, but I haven’t given a shit in so damn long
You tried to isolate me from my friends, while you sleep with yours so its hard to be strong
I remember when you held me hostage, you said you’d kill yourself and it would be my fault
I remember when I said I was struggling, you said you didn’t care, fuck you’re so damn cold

And this getting old, but I will never fold to your will and your manipulative games
I thought I knew you well, and in my arms I’d hold you, but all the love just seems to fade away

Through all the tears I’ve cried, and all the drawn out lies
You really took your time to let your darkness show
I hear the echoed chimes of all the hurt inside
Self inflicted scars that only seem to grow

Now I’m a fallen shell
Way too many faults to tell
My soul is gone, it’s dark, you see?
Wrapped up in my apathy

Apathy

HeyLee Manzeron

HeyLee Manzeron x Robstar - Apathy [Prod. WXRST]

She wanna love me, 
She doesn't know me. 
Bitch I been glowing, 
Like I'm super saiyan. 
I'm super hot, 
And I ain't even blazin. 
Okay, 
Bitch I ain't want it. 
Bitch I ain't coming. 
Stay in my room, 
Till it's noon, 
Then I get my girl, 
And I drum it. 
Bitch I been bumming, 
But still I can flex. 
Lazy as fuck, 
But I'm making a cheque. 
Letting her suck, 
And I'm getting her wet. 
She wanna Link, 
But girl I am not Rhett. 
Game set, 
Match. 
Pussy, 
Step back. 
I got, 
Big bags. 
Fuck a, 
Price tag. 

I been up since 9am. 
Bitch I'm stressed. 
Working everyday, 
I never get my fucking rest. 
Bullet vest, 
I'm taking shots. 
Fireball, 
It on the rocks. 
Feel like sauna, 
In my jaws. 
I'm Ghostrider, 
Kill them all.
I'm with Joe, 
I'm with Goyard, 
In the studio. 
Got no hoes, 
I got a princess, 
All I'm needing though. 
She ain't in another castle, 
I was lucky with the raffle. 
I'm a cocky mother fucker. 
I'm a sexy fuckin asshole.

Gotta princess what you got?
You been fucking with a thot. 
You been fucking with a trick, 
You know I finna take your spot. 
Clean it out just like a mop, 
When I'm popping at the opp. 
Bitch I came from nothing, 
Now they know that I'm on top.

She wanna love me, 
She doesn't know me. 
Bitch I been glowing, 
Like I'm super saiyan. 
I'm super hot, 
And I ain't even blazin. 
Okay, 
Bitch I ain't want it. 
Bitch I ain't coming. 
Stay in my room, 
Till it's noon, 
Then I get my girl, 
And I drum it. 
Bitch I been bumming, 
But still I can flex. 
Lazy as fuck, 
But I'm making a cheque. 
Letting her suck, 
And I'm getting her wet. 
She wanna Link, 
But girl I am not Rhett. 
Game set, 
Match. 
Pussy, 
Step back. 
I got, 
Big bags. 
Fuck a, 
Price tag. 

SUPER SAIYAN!

Fireball spillin, 
Imma play the villain, 
Im with Hero and I'm chilling. 
You got zero what you feelin?
I been, 
Fireball spillin, 
Imma play the villain. 
I'm with Hero and I'm chilling, 
You got zero what you feelin?
Break back like I'm Bane, 
Like I'm insane, 
I spilled the vodka on my chain, 
I bet your bitch, 
She knows my name, 
Got her drippin, 
Like it's rain. 
I could stack a thousand plays, 
I could conquer like I'm Kang, 
She make me feel like Modok, 
Cause I got the big brain. 

Villainous, 
Venemous. 
Kill you, 
If I'm generous. 
Last night asking "who is this?"
Now she tryna suck my dick. 
Stacking racks, 
Now I'm greener than a Goblin. 
Imma take her out, 
And if she like it imma cop it. 
I got like a rack, 
Put in the bag. 
Bitch I need a stack, 
Bitch I need the cash. 
I got hundreds in the bank, 
I got money I got cake, 
Made some shit you couldn't make. 
Like this whole damn fucking tape. 

Look at me killing I feel like a villain, 
I guess that it's something you know. 
Breaking the ceiling im feeling, 
Like I am the one who is taking your hoe. 
Look at me peeling I'm dealing, 
With shit that you couldn't or wouldn't compose. 
Married the game and I stay in my lane, 
You should look at me chilling with bros. 

I feel like a god, 
I don't need a melody. 
I'm my own producer, 
I don't need your fucking beat. 
You're a fucking failure, 
Like you're epitome. 
Juice WRLD wannabe, 
Bet you pray to Lil Peep.

Fireball spillin, 
Imma play the villain, 
Im with Hero and I'm chilling. 
You got zero what you feelin?
I been, 
Fireball spillin, 
Imma play the villain. 
I'm with Hero and I'm chilling, 
You got zero what you feelin?
Break back like I'm Bane, 
Like I'm insane, 
I spilled the vodka on my chain, 
I bet your bitch, 
She knows my name, 
Got her drippin, 
Like it's rain. 
I could stack a thousand plays, 
I could conquer like I'm Kang, 
She make me feel like Modok, 
Cause I got the big brain. 

VILLAIN!

BRAIN ROT

Angel In Disguise w/ Danny's Adventures & HeyLee Manzeron

I ain't been myself in a long time 
I ain't felt right in this moonlight 
Summer undone for the third time
Praying and I'm wishing I could feel right 
I just wanna feel something baby
I just wanna feel something lately 
I just wanna feel something baby 
I just wanna feel something lately

Tell me gotta stop
When I put myself on top 
Cop anything I want
I don't shop 
I just buy shit 
Say she feel something special
I'm electric
I said baby you don't want me
I'm a bad kid
Two weeks later I be on some new shit 
Y'all can talk and you gon talk but you won't do shit 
I ain't no better need to cool it
Instead I pop a fucking tag on these new kicks
Nikes
Why she even tell me that she like me
Two years later on some shit
She tryna fight me
Fuck me for forgiveness 
Imma do it if she tries me
I'm so fucking livid
But forget it if I'm piping
Blowing bottles back
Like an automatic rifle
Imma hold the trigger 
On the mikes and I might fall
I ain't feeling better 
When the time come to nightfall 
I ain't getting better 
I'm just stuck in this time vault

I ain't been myself in a long time 
I ain't felt right in this moonlight 
Summer undone for the third time
Praying and I'm wishing I could feel right 
I just wanna feel something baby
I just wanna feel something lately 
I just wanna feel something baby 
I just wanna feel something lately

Triple dot text
It ain't sent yet 
I just wonder what you mean 
When you saying we ain't set
I thought we worked it all out
What you talking bout now
Say I never really meant it
But I did from the bounce 
All around 
Like surround sound 
Pounding in my head
I don't feel your love
I don't even feel sex
I'm empty in the core
And there's nothing in my chest 
No heart for myself 
No love for the rest

FEELSOMETHING

All instruments recorded by HeyLee Manzeron

Lyrics:

Lookin at me with a pompous grin
You're sucking clams out of vanilla wafers
No water taking ritalin
Prozac will be the perfect chaser

We touch skin on skin
Doing the same things over again
Cause I'm less of a man
Just more of a faded concept

Vice junky since the 2010s
Fast track to meet my goddamn maker
Eating risperdol like m&ms
Future HeyLee's like Hannah Baker

We touch skin on skin
Doing the same, but never again
Cause I'm less of a man
Just more of a sad attraction 

My miracles work in reverse
Everything I touch, i promise you it'll come out worse
I'll hide away inside my head, in the end its really all that i have
Does that make me less of a man?

With all the pills and all the drinks
Haven't felt like myself since god knows when
I'm struggling to feel complete
Does that make me less of a man

We touch skin on skin
Doing the same shit over again
I was less of man
The perfect scapegoat just to point your finger
Cause I’m not less of a man
You better hope to god the pain don’t linger

Less Of A Man

Stream on all platforms:
https://open.spotify.com/track/1a2VkKJMDItgcfMM4uSIr9?si=4J882XkVRmmWXnUUw7Zz8w

Snappin (prod. InBloom)

WASNT FAST ENOUGH PROD BY SMEbeats X BlastyBeatz

I guess this is it for a while.

To be continued...

Artwork by annalyceart

Produced, mixed and mastered by HeyLee Manzeron

Lyrics:

I met up with the mystery girl
I told her I’d take her place
Her use has run out in this world
She told me straight to my face
These metaphors are cliche
Like a lingering foul taste
Or a cavity on your tooth
Falling onto your pillowcase

I could tell you everything that’s ever been on my mind
But I don’t wanna bore you to death
I’m holding on to the secrets I kept
And I could tell you every sight that’s ever passed through these eyes
But I don’t wanna waste my breath
I’m holding on to the secrets I kept

Following my path is something you will regret
I’d like to say I’m saving face while I’m cutting my skin with a rusty gillette
It’s only for you, only you will ever get to slice this deep in me
It’s only for you baby, and I’m sorry.

I could 	show you every leaf that’s been strangled by this vine
But I would never choke you to death
To tell the truth you’re all I have left
And maybe I should open up, but I’m comfortable inside
But I don’t wanna scare you away
I’m not prepared to lose you today

Following my path is something you will regret
I’d like to say I’m saving face, but a passing glance is all you will get
It’s only for you, only you will ever get to slice this deep in me
It’s only for you baby, and I’m sorry.

Maybe you’re the falling star that I’ve been searching for my entire life
Possibly the deepest scar, I know you’ll cut my throat like an umbilical knife
Yes, you’re my fallen star, we could just let go and vanish into the night
Possibly the deepest scar, but I will let you in, you make everything right
Maybe you’re the falling star that I’ve been searching for my entire life
Possibly the deepest scar, I know you’ll cut my throat like an umbilical knife
Yes, you’re my fallen star, we could just let go and vanish into the night
Possibly the deepest scar, but I will let you in, you make everything right

Listen On Spotify

It's Only For You

I wrote this song when I was in a really dark place. 

Rest in peace, Nick, I miss you, I'm sorry.

Listen on Spotify!

its only me again (Prod. NICKISGONENOW)

-CREDITS-
PRODUCED BY DYLAN "HOROSHA" HARRIS
LYRICS BY CARL "CARLBY" LODOEN
ART BY DEAD & DETACHED (@deadanddetached)

-lyrics-
i'm a goddamn vampire
smokin' up all day
tryna see if i can get higher
'cuz lately i’ve been so low
i am not the same me that i see in old photos

you left me alone
feeling like i’m Swayze with the way these ladies go ghost
won’t answer your phone
message left unread
damn how you so cold

type out a text to my ex yeah
tell her shes the best and how i wish she never left yeah
but truthfully i wish we had never even met
'cuz you left me in distress
despite all the things you'd said

all the promises unkept
when you left you took my best
all the nights you spent with him
you could've been home fixing shit like
damn how you so cold
got me in a chokehold
no matter where i go
you'll always follow

all the promises unkept
all the nights you spent with him
got me feelin' like a simp yeah
damn how you so cold
got me in a chokehold
no matter where i go
your hands are at my throat

Vampire (Prod. Horosha)

-CREDITS-
PRODUCED BY DYLAN "HOROSHA" HARRIS & CARL "CARLBY" LODOEN
LYRICS BY CARL "CARLBY" LODOEN & ZACK "4LORN" DUNBAR
FEATURING ZACK "4LORN" DUNBAR (@4lornmusic) & DYLAN "HOROSHA" HARRIS
ART BY DEAD & DETACHED (@deadanddetached)

-lyrics-
will i be like this forever or will this one day pass
will i ever get better of will i just stay trapped
In this cycle of fear and regret
will i ever get better
or am i better off dead

(4lorn)
sometimes i try to find love in this place
with my heart on my sleeves and a gun to my head
try to make my own happiness without you in my arms
since i met you i just wanted you to love me in the end

i wanna feel whole again
maybe i just need a friend
can i recover from this
or am i better off dead

Better Off w/ 4lorn (Prod. Horosha)

-CREDITS-
PRODUCED BY DYLAN "HOROSHA" HARRIS & CARL "CARLBY" LODOEN
LYRICS BY CARL "CARLBY" LODOEN & DYLAN "HOROSHA" HARRIS
FEATURING DYLAN "HOROSHA" HARRIS
ART BY DEAD & DETACHED (@deadanddetached)

-lyrics-
lately i've been feeling worthless
as if i have no purpose
i know i'm not perfect 
neither are you
weighty heavy on my shoulders
i'm scared of growing older
i don't think i deserve half of what i've been through

what i've been through 
it's that type shit to make me come unglued
i feel worthless like i have no worth left
i’m imperfect but i’m doing my best

don't need the money or the fame
i'm just tryna explain how i've been the same way
through my pain i create
for all those who relate
but i won’t let it break me yet

(Horosha)
and yeah i never meant to be someone i hate to see
when i look in the mirror but
i wont turn away just yet
i won’t add this to a list of my regrets

Worthless (Prod. Horosha)

THE PRODUCER IS A GOAT BITCH
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KvCOPJjPxe0

BLANK!

BLANK! - GLIZZ X LONELY (Prod BLANKタ)

She/Her 🏳️‍⚧️
Artist, Producer
Ghxst Collective

i'm still here, forever manzeron