Amazing, beautiful song...you are so talented 👏👏👏👏

** I uploaded this song to streaming, and for copyright reasons it cannot be used in youtube videos any longer :( ! Please feel free to use a different song of mine in your video! **

it’s warmer and brighter and nicer this march
than it ever was last may
and i think that the world is slowly ending
but i think the world is better off that way

if we truly are just dust from space
if we go or stay, it doesn’t really matter
but if we’re something more and we f*cked up this bad
well, i think that might just make me sadder

it’s a cute little form of nihilism
where my mind has finally found it’s home
wandering the streets of late stage capitalism
well, i guess there are worse streets to roam

it’s colder and sadder who are we pretending
why we joke oh i cannot say
and i think that the world is finally ending
but i think the world is better off that way

but i think the world is better off that way

sad song

don’t mistake my sadness for weakness
though i’m falling straight for the ground

broken into a billion little pieces
don’t take too long to come back to town

they say that winners can be losers
well, we can be losers too

zoning out to a dimes square epstein truther
while i’m daydreaming sleeping next to you

if you say love comes at a cost 
i won’t believe you
believing in yourself will often get you lost
i need to see you

so track me down 

don’t take yourself too serious
but don’t think that you’re funny at all

how come i’m smiling when i’m furious?
cramming my emotions small

feeling sick at the sight of my front door
god damn do i sure miss home

opted to leave but I would return still
baby if you’d pick up the phone

if you say life comes at a cost 
i won’t believe you
i fear i may have got myself lost
i need to see you

i’ll hunt you down

Track Me Down/Hunt You Down

i admit i was drinking 
before we met
caffeine would have been a heaven send
again

standing outside
didn’t mind the rain
while you’re coming down for me again
oh man

when you let me in
i was warming up
pour myself another cup
pretend

that i’ve been fine
the past few months
when truth is i've been in the dumps
my friend


you win
i lose
time and time again


i taste your breath
and i feel the cold
seeping deep down into my bones
playing dead

it’s not the same 
as i thought it was
my consciousness starts to float above
my head


you win
i lose
time and time again

you win

Nothing

Wrote/recorded this song in early 2021. 

Was going through my old files and thought I'd share here. <3

a step back

too bright

A poem accompanied by original background piano music:

"A Little Boy's Dream" by Katherine Mansfield

***
 
To and fro, to and fro
In my little boat I go
Sailing far across the sea
All alone, just little me.
And the sea is big and strong
And the journey very long.
To and fro, to and fro
In my little boat I go.

Sea and sky, sea and sky,
Quietly on the deck I lie,
Having just a little rest.
I have really done my best
In an awful pirate fight,
But we cdaptured them all right.
Sea and sky, sea and sky,
Quietly on the deck I lie--

Far away, far away
From my home and from my play,
On a journey without end
Only with the sea for friend
And the fishes in the sea.
But they swim away from me
Far away, far away
From my home and from my play.

Then he cried "O Mother dear."
And he woke and sat upright,
They were in the rocking chair,
Mother's arms around him--tight.


Here is an analysis of the poem: 

Katherine Mansfield's poem "A Little Boy's Dream" captures the whimsical and fantastical nature of a child's imagination. Through vivid and surreal imagery, the poem portrays the boy's dream as a blend of wonder and innocence. Themes of adventure, curiosity, and the boundless creativity of childhood are prominent, emphasizing the magical and unrestricted world of a child's mind. Mansfield's portrayal celebrates the pure and enchanting experience of dreaming as seen through a child's eyes.



Concerning the background music:
 
Neo-Contemporary Ethereal Fusion music is an attempt at an extraordinary and intricate musical journey that incorporates an array of innovative elements and artistic influences. Drawing inspiration from Neo-Classical, Avant-Garde, and Contemporary music, it standw as a tribute to the limitless possibilities to poetic exploration. 

This track showcases relentless commitment to pushing the boundaries of musical expression beyond the musical rules. 

Its Experimental nature invites listeners to embrace the unknown, as it delves into uncharted sonic territories. The result is an intricate tapestry of sound that challenges traditional norms and expectations. 

The Ethereal and Ambient qualities infuse the music with an almost otherworldly aura, creating an immersive and transcendent listening experience. 

The Minimalist approach adds depth and complexity through simplicity, allowing each note and sound to carry profound significance. The Fusion elements weave together a rich and diverse sonic palette, transcending genres and conventions. This Fusion not only tries to captivate but also provoke thught and emotion, making the musical tracks truly Expressive in its storytelling. With a Cinematic flair, this music may transport the listener to distant realms and evokes vivid imagery and emotions. It's Evocative in its ability to paint sonic landscapes that spark the imagination. 

Enigmatic and Reflective, the music invites listeners to explore the depths of their thoughts and emotions. It serves as a catalyst for introspection and self-discovery, leaving an indelible mark on the soul.

A Little Boy's Dream by Katherine Mansfield

cover picture - dylan martin ( @veryfreakingcool on instagram, follow that gurly)

please don't go (demo)

the sun burns through my eyes
and to be frank i’m not surprised 
that i’m met with nothingness
with dead silence
with nothing
i gaze through the mirror
and it becomes clear
there is something

there is something

salt in the wound that almost healed
and i still don’t know how to tell what’s real
and what’s something else
oh, i can not tell
what is something 
the sunlight
has burned my eyes
now i'm nothing 

i am nothing

sun song

the children have followed the footsteps of their father they're stuck in his evil trail

if only they heard the word of their kind mother who said when he gets bad, bail

he has studied greatly yet has never learned a smidgen of a single thing

they had met when they were younger but now are far gone as she she morphs into a frail being


his presence always trampled what was he was surrounding and she let him trample down

now her daughter tramples flowers as internal screaming grows into eternal frowns

nails on a chalkboard filling up the dreams of what she once had used to love

but when she wakes in a cold sweat she forgets bout what she was even dreaming of 


he takes her to the backyard before the sun rises, she stares down a loaded gun

she’s saddened but she’s not surprised as she tries to break down the old barn door and run

but when old door opens she's met with the feeling that she'll never come around

she lays upon her lover’s feet and decides to just rest and let him trample down

backyard at night

i will take my time
i hope that you’ll yours

for i have fallen down
a rabbit hole of horrors

won’t you tell me the thruth babe?
i can tell you’re lying through your teeth

there is nothing more painful
than when two broken people meet

i’ve hid myself from darkness
now all i know is light

i depend on you so heavily
even when i'm taking flight

promise when i leave for california
you won’t leave me behind 
i want to go i want to stay
i want to know that there’s a way

for love to power through
i’m forever indebted to you
for making me okay

i know love will power through
i’m forever indebted to you
for making me okay

you win

Ian Fredrickson

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Margus Sillan

Christie Fredrickson

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