blowing ash into my lungs like im an ashtray

I'm 18 today, I've been listening to this song since I was 14, it does hit different now lol

Almost gonna turn 17 listening since middle school crazy how life changes so quick but can feel so long at certain periods

Sad times

'Bitter Blue '
coming soon...

Prod:
@93feetofsmoke

MERCH: http://lilxlotus.storenvy.com/products/18507607-lil-lotus-noose-longsleeve

And i still remember 
Your hands in my hair
And the fireplace in December
And time's forever changing
But i still feel the same for you
I just wish you felt the same way too

I don't wanna waste you time 
And i know you have a better life
But it's stuck inside my head 
And i don't wanna leave my bed

So just tell me you want me 
Tell me you need me
Tell me you'll come back
And you're never leaving

I was eighteen when you loved me
And now i know I'm twenty-something
But I'm still hoping that you'd come home
And tell me everywhere that you've gone

eighteen (prod. 93FEETOFSMOKE)

Spyro <3 PS2 (Prod by Foxwedding)

[Prod. Kamikaze] 
// Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/6obbyy/
// Twitter: https://twitter.com/6obby
// Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/c/6obby
.
.
Lyrics:
Ain't  Nobody  really fuckin with me like they  always say
And all these people hit me up but I know that they be fake,
I'm Gonna grab the lawn mower and finally cut off all you snakes 
I just wanna one day finally get up out this place ,
But that's always been the dream, same shit  a different day,
So I pop a few xans and  try to eliminate this pain,
But it's never gonna change, and I'll always feel the same
I don't know what to do  my life is looking plain,
Never feel excited and it's always been this way
I wanna make it out  I wanna get up out this rain 
And Say you had my back but always saw  me in this pain,
I'm tired of this shit,  and I'm so tired of these days,
Sleepless nights, anxiety, just  ain't no good for me,
Wanna tell my problems but nobody listening,
Sleepless nights, anxiety, just  ain't no good for me,
Wanna tell my problems but nobody listening , yeah

Ain't nobody listening, yeah,
Ain't nobody listening, yeah,
Ain't nobody listening , yeah, 
Ain't nobody fuckin care,
Ain't nobody fuckin care, yeah
Ain't nobody fuckin care, yeah,
 Ain't nobody fuckin care yeah,

So I smoke up all this dope and I always check my phone,
Every 5 minutes even though that I'm alone, 
Nobody hit me up I'm always feeling like a ghost
I just wanna find some peace but nowhere feels like home,
Always smokin up  and sippin' on some styrofoam,
Yeah I got this guap and that iPhone rose gold,
But that don't mean I'm happy I'm just feeling so alone,
I just want somebody who would listen and can cope,
I don't know what to do cause I can't trust a soul,
Sippin all this lean but still  these problems overflow ,
I Ain't got shit to lose like I'm on death row 
Say you understand but you don't even fuckin know 
Every day I wake up and I'm always feeling low,
I just chase this dream and hope that one day I will blow, 
I've just had enough And hope that one day this can stop,
I'll just keep on working and grinding to the top, yeah.

nobody

Free Download

rip your underwear (prod. tothegood)

production by jay vee
vocals by shinigami

@ihateshinigami
full project together soon

grew up too fast
like a bullet breaking thru the glass
remember that
fell asleep in every single class
i hate the fact
that ive become an insomniac
i hate the fact
that im never ever going back

cant even say that im feeling sad
i cant help but dwell on everything i had back when i was a kid
all those emotions they cease to exist

the world was so new woke up bright every day
now im just jaded its faded to grey
and i lay in a coffin that i helped create
facing the fact that ill never feel great again

shinigami - grew up 2 fast (prod. jay vee)

occam's razor

in vain w/ kaiyko

decaying at 18 w/ supachefm

follow my bros @supachefm @guardinmusic <3
art by https://twitter.com/joeonexz
thank you all for any support, love u family
spoti.fi/2Bpo07A
apple.co/2Ab3U3e
https://tothegood.bandcamp.com/track/tothegood-little-bit-of-psycho-feat-supachefm-guardin

lyrics:

supachefm

i keep fighting i keep hiding all the pressure
hide behind a mask to coincide with all the extras!
cut my ties
lye me on the stretcher
finding my own time always fighting for an extra bit

im heaven sent
goes up my nose now im hella bent
i show my ass cause my pants dont fit
i lost my shit never making sense

why try
when my heart is where my head is
blindsides
the emotions and the feelings
i find
never had a different angle
i tried

to break the cycle
and shake the surface
i told my parents why they never earned it
you need a little bit of psycho to be perfect
i spend my earnings
you never earned it
______________________________________________

guardin

and i think that i
have got one too many things inside my mind
i'm alone but you're here like all the time
all the memories we shared never die 
this room is a chamber of sin
swallowing terror my nightmares will win
i'm falling asleep with a bottle of gin
my heart beat is steady but my skin is thin
______________________________________________

the only way you can make me crazy is by doing something crazy yourself
[Silver Linings Playbook]

spotify

little bit of psycho (feat. supachefm & guardin)

https://open.spotify.com/track/4SyKnSUTgKkTjAZETcQJ01?si=wqCOaZ7zRLy2ZJAeTL0OLg

@ihateshinigami
@ihateshinigami
@ihateshinigami
@ihateshinigami

shinigami - memories of you (prod. 4evr) [NOW ON SPOTIFY, ITUNES, ETC.,]

Just a little something we were working on and never released :)

Cover of "If It Means A Lot To You" by A Day To Remember 
Guitar and Mixing by Shinigami
Recorded in 2017

shinigami + shy - If It Means A Lot To You (Acoustic Cover)

produced by @ihateshinigami
engineered by heartbreak jake and shinigami
written and performed by macho randy and shinigami

I'm so sorry for what I did last night at that party with her :(

SHINIGAMI & MACHO RANDY "IDK why I'm like this"

credits:

@4evergone
@charlieshuffler
@kellbender
@pxlm
@supachefm
@guccihighwaters

i will never be a memory

download

a place where i belong [feat. supachefm!] (prod. 4evr)

an angels smiles what you sell
drag me slowly down to hell
misery is all i see
i can feel you here with me
cross my heart and hope you die
repeat the phrase until its time
born into this world to rot
all things come to be loved and lost

i wont be what you want me to be
feels like everyone just wants something from me

is it true what they say
just like night turns to day
you wake up to the sound
of your kids at your grave

say goodbye
say goodnight
make sure you sleep tight
knowing well this the last time youll see the sunlight

i did it all for you
i did this all for you

cross my heart n hope u die </3

a love letter to u

lyrics: what a world i live in now
the stars are falling from the heavens

bright lights
take away my vision
im blinded from it all

its just my luck
my lucks been running out
now the tides begin to turn

its my fault
and i know that this is none if your concern

im better off sleeping in my bedroom
wide awake since the day i met you
i dont know if i can make it thru this year

make it thru this year

i think about how much has changed
i cant hold onto these distant memories

letting go of all this takes time
im not in a rush at all

im growing up
and growing older 
everyday feels like a blur

it makes me sick
but i know that this something i must learn

im better off sleeping in my bedroom
wide awake since the day i met you
i dont know if i can make it thru this year

make it thru this year :(

decaying at 18 w/ supachefm

shinigami

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sick angel

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