Name: Ilya's Retreat - Rather Dead Than Alive by Iranai in my rock and punk and shit playlist
Duration: 3 min 5 s
Description: Off the album 'Apologies of the Kinslayer'.

my rock and punk and shit playlist

Silver Chaining

Raven

Gone Away

Legacy Of The Outsider

Foreign Entity

No Turn Around

Glass Reflection

No Turn Around (acoustic)

Raven (acoustic)

Featuring https://soundcloud.com/bradyamour and https://soundcloud.com/safehold 

Produced by King Theta

Art by Biteki
https://twitter.com/sleepyxbxy
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCsUeNbrb8t2Td1faP1VbK2g

(King Theta)
Can you look at yourself in the mirror,
And honestly say that you've faced any fears?
Overlooking what needs to be nearer,
What's staring you right in the face
All that I needed was self-intervention
The sores keep on bleeding and I'd never mention
Keep on defeating myself, I'm obsessed now 
With getting the fuck out of state

I could leave this all behind,
This mess of a life
(An overgrown dream graveyard)
I could die in Sacramento,
Be the joke that burns in auburn,
Or get my shit and turn my back on you

(Brady Amour)
Intentions 
The ones you never hide 
They took you for a ride 
And made you feel alive 

I don’t know if I can make you love me 
Said too many lies now you never trust me 
I’m holding out, I'm holding on to something 
Broken heart I don’t wanna leave with nothing

(King Theta)
I could leave this all behind,
This mess of a life
(An overgrown dream graveyard)
I could die in Sacramento,
Be the joke that burns in auburn,
Or get my shit and turn my back on you

(Safehold)
I’m leaving for real this time
I don’t even want to talk more,
Just want to leave this place right here
And burn out like it’s nascar
Shawty in the back seat,
You can come on with me.
Bump a little backstreet
Bool on out like bigby.

All these locals wanna talk right now
I just hope you're not one
Too afraid to just leave this place and then run,
I wanna bool out in a fast car, nascar
Lil uzi I leave this place with no passport
I don’t want you to be where I’m not,
All I want is an end

(King Theta)
Can you let go of self medication?
Can you let go of our weak foundation?
Toxic vibrations, they seep through the pavement
This town holds a horrible fate
All that I needed was self-intervention
The sores keep on bleeding and I'd never mention
Keep on defeating myself, I'm obsessed now 
With getting the fuck out of state

Overgrown Dream Graveyard (ft. Brady Amour and safehold)

Off the album 'Apologies of the Kinslayer'.

Apologies of the Kinslayer

Rather Dead Than Alive

Ilya's Retreat - Rather Dead Than Alive

statues (feat. ohlucifer)

Dredged from the bottom of a dead man’s gullet
Carved into the ugliest down-and-out
You’ll live with the smell in the heart of winter
Pass me in the summer, and you’ll wanna leave town
 
Poked by the sticks of a children’s choir
Coughed up something awful: they’ll never sing again
Bathed in the river, got a rash that feels like fire
All the fish decide that they’re amphibians
 
I know when I’ve finally outstayed my welcome
Stocks in pitchforks go through the roof
Weathermen have started using my name
They’d rather have a hurricane than see my face
 
In this ugly world I feel like a model
I’ve been the worst me that I can be
I’d rather have a purpose than having sod all
Even if it’s turning stomachs in the streets
 
You’ve walked by me with your mind on salad spoons
Spice racks, and brand new bidets
My black eyes rained down a monsoon
Right upon your godforsaken gilded cage
 
You set fire to me, but my diseases
Will take to the air like a pestilent fog
Try and hold your breath, there’s no avoiding
I’ll leave you like a ragged, wretched, plague-bitten dog

(Image taken from Twin Peaks season 3)

Pond Scum

no samples
prod. 1080p dreams

lyrics:

doctors please don't discharge me
I don't wanna fucking leave
I've been here forever but I'm still not missing home
I eat for free
the staff treats me like I'm some royalty
feeding me drugs while I sit on a high throne 
all the patients here are awfully friendly
I like the way they always compliment me
no fear of judgment cause they're all fucked up like me
the outside world's too fucking scary 
real life burdens are too much to carry 
just keep me locked in here and throw away the key
I'm becoming the psych ward van wilder 
it's pathetic that I've been here for this long
I'm becoming the psych ward van wilder 
I'm still here but all my peers have long since moved on
nurses please sedate me
so I can have sweet dreams
like last night I dreamt that I had built a time machine
I traveled back to Y2K 
and saw blink 182 play
the mark, tom, and travis show
matt's just the coffee boy
all the drama here is so exciting
in the hallways a schizo is fighting with a security guard
it's so disorderly
all the noise forced me to get out of my bed
interaction helped me get out of my head
even if a lot of it was super weird
and there were times when I got sad
but after all the good times I had
I thought maybe life's not that bad
memories I won't forget soon
like that one night in the day room
cracking jokes and laughing so hard that we cried
I'm becoming the psych ward van wilder
it's pathetic that I've been here for this long
I'm becoming the psych ward van wilder
I'm still here but all my peers have long since moved on
yeah they've moved onto bigger and better things
I never wanna see the outside world again
I never wanna see the outside world again
I could not care less if I never saw it again

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psych ward van wilder

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Lyrics:

All I want is to feel a bit
We could fall in love
You could slit my wrist
I could tell you now that they both 'gon feel the same

I've been wide awake
I've been blacking out
I've been locked away
Could you let me out?
Cause I've grown so tired of existing in this cage

I remember when I used to feel
(It was beautiful)
But I guess that's something you can steal
(And I lost it all)
Now nothing seems to feel too real
(Unbelievable)
What have I been running from?
How did I become so numb?

I'm so numb
I give up
What have I been running from?
How did I become so numb?

All I want is a night of sleep
You could knock me out
I could rest in peace
I don't mind if I get to close my eyes

I've been day to day
I've been dying slow
If you find a way
Could you let me know?
My confusion no longer comes as a surprise

I remember when I used to feel
(It was beautiful)
But I guess that's something you can steal
(And I lost it all)
Now nothing seems to feel too real
(Unbelievable)
What have I been running from?
How did I become so numb?

I'm so numb
I give up
What have I been running from?
How did I become so numb?

All I want is to feel a bit
You could knock me out
You could slit my wrist

I'm so numb
I give up
What have I been running from?
How did I become so numb?

Black

Numb

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An alternative rock band with hardcore influences from Poland.

Ilya's Retreat - Rather Dead Than Alive

Iranai

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