Not cursed. And yes it’s a promise 🫶🏻😍🫂

i’m either numb or i feel way too much
i’ve come to terms who i am and how it’s just my luck
i always hated change i hate it worse involving breaking up
when i can feel i gotta front
i’m always acting tough
i’m missing all the days with not a worry in the world
cause now i’m in a daze just tryna make some sense of it
as soon as i climb out i fall into a deeper pit of darkness 
leaving me to wonder if i never found my way out
would i be missed

when i open up my eyes
all i see and all i feel is leading to demise
the emptiness and shattered dreams the things that keep me up at night
the constant question what it means it got me looking to the skies like
like
like why

why do i feel like this
anxiety has got a hold on me it’s got a tight grip
my fist striking the concrete while on night shift
so many people but i still don’t know where i fit
i don’t wanna work a normal job 
i got dreams i could reach if i carry on
i have days when i feel like i could be on top
but then most of the other days i hate every single song

when i open up my eyes
all i see and all i feel is leading to demise
the emptiness and shattered dreams the things that keep me up at night
the constant question what it means it got me looking to the skies like
like
like why

why do good people have to go through bad things
why do people like you more when you have a little fame
why do people have advice for you when they are not the same
why can i not explain the reason that i have this pain
i don’t know if it’s cause and effect
i don’t know if it’s something that i’m bound with to my death
all i know is that half the time i feel like i am dead
and the other half anticipate for when it comes again

when i open up my eyes
all i see and all i feel is leading to demise
the emptiness and shattered dreams the things that keep me up at night
the constant question what it means it got me looking to the skies like
like
like why

i'm either numb or i feel way too much (prod. cloud cadet)

i don't think love is real

Blaming Me For Us

Im Losing It w/Matego (prod. moon)

cursed

written and performed by: @futoh
mixed and mastered by: @futoh
produced by: zeeky
———
was a lil sick but we up
———
lyrics:

eventually, itll all come crashing down,
buried under circumstance,
should've touched the thermostat,
cause i was freezing in the icy lovers water,
it all looks ok until your mind then starts to ponder,

will this happen?
will it not?
will i mess it up again,
cause the greatest of all battles are the ones you fight within,
when youre up against yourself you lose all hope,
then you try to cope,
telling you youre more
than that silly little mope,
that cant seem to pass his classes,
that cant seem to please the masses,
to them its all a joke,
but what you're missing is the punchline,
waiting for the right time-
oh its fizzled out,
now youre left alone in darkness with no one to help you 
out,

youre on your lonesome,
wont get it back,
you searching for your old life,
but its a wrap,
now its time to start again,
with sticks and stones youll build a home
and eventually an empire,
where you'll rest upon a throne,
you’ll be untouchable,
youll look at them through monocles,
a single lens is all you need,
yea no distractions,
and actions,
will come back,
like habits you 
you broke that,
but that dont mean its over,
now its time to run the throwback,

(filler thingie)

eventually, itll all come crashing down,
buried under circumstance,
should've touched the thermostat,
cause i was freezing in the icy lovers water,
it all looks ok until your mind then starts to ponder,
all the little things tend to get me,
you smiles when you met me,
no i cant forget, youll be gone eventually,
and if you do, its all on me,
shouldve treated you better,
instead of getting mad at you when you got wine on my sweater, damn

eventually pt. 2 (prod. zeeky)

written and performed by: @futoh
mixed and mastered by: @futoh
produced by: @futoh
———
wandering soul.
———
lyrics:

the birds silent,
and I’m my own tyrant,
I rule over the world for a bit,
but then I snap,
the worlds not vibrant,
and it all just seems so violent,
in a prison of requirements,
I let go of my garments,
I’m the one without a target,
I’m free (im free),
I’m truly free (im truly free)
I got no fees to pay (no fees to pay),
I got no friends to make (no friends to make),
I got no goals to reach (no goals to reach),
I got no truth to seek (no truth to seek),
it’s only me myself and I,
the flowers blossom as we speak,
they pay attention
when no one else would,
but no one else should,
they’ll just laugh at me,
the apathy’s,
disgusting,
they just ask me for my money,
beat me till my nose is runny,
and then they’ll think it’s funny,
swear I’m better as a mummy
decompose into the earth,
I’ll be part of something greater,
in a hundred years,
when grass is green,
you’ll hear my name in fables,
but for now you only hear my name when teachers send me home,
(they send me home),
that kid was getting picked on,
and they left him all alone
(yea all alone)

nature sleeps and i'm still wandering (prod. futoh)

i do not worship satan, this is fire force

@akumuh - I AM AKUMUH (prod. neverforever)

Maybe you don't want me...

Discover Thomas Reid:
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/artist/0dcxj82ddksd6tDDcJgbqo?si=-O1Ii6RgTaKCD8_BdvoQvQ&dl_branch=1
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCgwYdPzYFFKWu_7tCAAGQZw
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thomasreidmusic/

Lyrics:
I thought about
Calling your number
I don’t why I couldn’t press send
I’m hovering my heart 
Over a live volcano
Opening up pandora’s box
On the edge

I though about
Telling you I love you
I’m not sure what that feels like now
I know that you don’t think I’m going to heaven
Maybe you don’t want me dragging you down

But do you dream of when
We could be a family
Just be here again
Maybe it’s a fantasy

I thought about
Telling you I’m sorry
I didn’t pick up the pieces right
I’m spending every weekend at your apartment
Wondering if every kid hears the fights

I thought about
Hiding in my bedroom
Watching as the rays from my night light glow
I’m clinging to your coat, oh daddy don’t leave now
Don’t know how to fight the monsters alone

Do you dream of when
We could be a family
Just be here again
Maybe it’s a fantasy

Music video

Maybe it's a Fantasy (Prod. idly blare)

turning a new leaf fr

lyrics -

I want nothing more, nothing more than to hold you
Nothing more, nothing more, darling I won’t ignore you

Blue, neon, lights
Shining in your eyes
Bringing my heart to life
Standing right by my
You, too, bright
Soaring to brand new heights
Reaching into the sky
Wanting you all for mine

I want nothing more, nothing more than to hold you
Nothing more, nothing more, darling I won’t ignore you
At all, never shall we fall, I want you inside my heart

Blue, neon, lights
Shining in your eyes
Bringing my heart to life
Standing right by my
You, too, bright
Soaring to brand new heights
Reaching into the sky
Wanting you all for mine
Blue, neon lights
Oh
Blue, neon lights
Oh

blue neon lights

blue neon lights (prod. red eyez)

If I Could Tell You
by W.H. Auden

Time will say nothing but I told you so,
Time only knows the price we have to pay;
If I could tell you I would let you know.

If we should weep when clowns put on their show,
If we should stumble when musicians play,
Time will say nothing but I told you so.

There are no fortunes to be told, although,
Because I love you more than I can say,
If I could tell you I would let you know.

The winds must come from somewhere when they blow,
There must be reasons why the leaves decay;
Time will say nothing but I told you so.

Perhaps the roses really want to grow,
The vision seriously intends to stay;
If I could tell you I would let you know.

Suppose the lions all get up and go,
And all the brooks and soldiers run away;
Will Time say nothing but I told you so?
If I could tell you I would let you know.

Listen to "If I Could Tell You V2" on SoundCloud🔗 https://soundcloud.com/childofsilence/poetry-in-music-if-i-could-tell-you-v2-wh-auden

「Poetry in Music」If I Could Tell You V1｜W. H. Auden

my spam soundcloud <3
pls dm me on insta @ juliaalex.a b4 sampling any of my songs, tyy!

cursed

juli♡

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