It was the bark heard round the Universe. The inhabitants of Orbis Canum were a peaceful bunch: four-legged, furry, mostly cute. While they had accomplished much in their planet’s history, it was their lack of opposable thumbs that limited their opportunities for advancement. In no way primitive, the Caeruleum had developed simplistic ways to fight, mainly with their teeth (and sometimes their cavernous, echoing shouting known as “barking”). This left the populace each with a mouth capable of smiling and a death grip nearly unmatched. However, when the people of Germaniae invaded Orbis Canum, they did so with advanced weaponry, like coil accelerators, capable of delivering devastating rounds that would pulverize even the strongest of Caeruleum. To the rescue came the Sopwith. They had signed a treaty with Orbis Canum some decades past to provide protection in exchange for work offworld, which would benefit both planets. Armed with propeller-powered crafts, both the Sopwith and the Caeruleum took to the skies, the furry inhabitants’ keen eyesight and hearing alerting pilots to potential bombing targets and strafing enemy craft. The deadliest duo was Leo Joco, veteran pilot of several intergalactic wars, and his companion Daisy, a black-and-white Caeruleum whose accuracy was unmatched. Together they fought through the Germaniaen forces, obliterating frigates and columns of troops, interrupting supply and communication lines, and trudging deep into enemy territory to deliver a blistering and explosive message: “We will never surrender.” The war would stretch on for 17 years, incurring millions of casualties on both sides. Daisy, who survived the war and passed away just a few weeks after the Treaty of Treats was signed, had ensured that Caeruleum would forever be safe from invasion with the establishment of planetary borders and an extended gravity and revolution contingency plan. In honor of Daisy, the members of Dog Fight, themselves Caeruleumians, formed amid the war, nine years in and eight years to go, as a way for the government to earn more money to continue building and surviving. Commissioned by President Sweetlips, the resulting album, some say, turned the tide of war. Within were eight blistering tracks, as if one were taped to the very wing of a craft, zooming through the air, dropping grenades, bricks, whatever you could find, onto the enemy. Daisy, of course, was at the center of the narrative, her photo adorning the album’s cover as her celebrity rose amongst the resistance. Featuring heavy, crunching bass, soaring melodies, and cloud-like rhythm and padding, Dog Fight is only half the picture. As there was never a follow-up album to coincide with the end of the war, it served as the fuel that stoked the flames of freedom, but never encapsulated the actual price that was paid. Daisy, between sorties, would make public appearances, sign paw-tographs, and encourage citizens to buy the album; then, it was back to the wing of her plane, gripping onto the canvas for dear life as she barked out instructions to the pilot. The Germaniaens feared the echoing call that would precede the whining buzz of her propellered vessel, knowing all too well that death was just beyond the horizon. So exhilarating was the album that some listeners, with weaker constitutions, could not make it through even the opening track. It was here that Dog Fight could have cemented itself as a powerhouse group: commissioned by the government and then breaking into the industry to spread its message. But funding dried up as more troops arrived from beyond the stars, and money was diverted away from the public-facing war effort. We salute both Daisy and Dog Fight; they created indelible images of bravery, freedom, and creativity, inspiring others to pick up both keyboard and weapon in the never-ending battle to keep the tastiest beats in the Universe free.

Bricks, Grenades, Whatever!

The Intergalactic Beets Project captures real beats from across the universe, presses them to vinyl, and issues them for all creatures to listen to.